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Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 4:53:24 AM

wantoplease

Posts: 2
Joined: 8/8/2005
Status: offline

My search has left me scared and heartbroken....I have taken ever road and each always leads me back to heartache...There are only a few maybe 3 or 4 that i have talk to hear that seem to be real...Why is the search so hard..Do I have a black cloud over me...

Post #: 1

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 5:01:18 AM

bluesteel762x51

Posts: 4
Joined: 7/30/2007
Status: offline

You have no black cloud, my sweet lady. ANYTIME you venture into the computer world, expect lies, and deceit. This site is free, so therefore when you open a window all the way, some bugs are going to fly in. Just learn to not jump early and do not lead with your lust.

(in reply to wantoplease)

Post #: 2

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 5:09:03 AM

SixFootMaster

Posts: 829
Joined: 9/27/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: wantoplease

My search has left me scared and heartbroken....I have taken ever road and each always leads me back to heartache...There are only a few maybe 3 or 4 that i have talk to hear that seem to be real...Why is the search so hard..Do I have a black cloud over me...

Not a question I can answer. A person should be as they are, whether dominant or submissive, slave or master. I can tell you that there is a vast difference between those who dabble around the edges of D/s to get thier rocks off, and those who embrace it fully. D/s by it's very nature requires a level of trust that surpasses any other kind of relationship. Not only is their a demand for honesty, but dishonesty itself is indicative of who does not truly belong in the category they claim. Why do people lie, misrepresent themselves, betray and defile? It's an eternal question for all humanity, not just those of us in D/s.

(in reply to wantoplease)

Post #: 3

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 5:26:58 AM

Absolutemaster

Posts: 79
Joined: 9/27/2005
Status: offline

Why Are so many Doms Untruthful?

Answer: they're not.

This is like asking why are so many Muslims terrorists... If they are a terrorist, then they are NOT Muslims. They may think they are, they may claim to be acting for Islam, but they are not.

If a Dom is untruthful, then he isn't a Dom, simple as that. He doesn't deserve that title. Sites like this are plagued with cheats and liars and frauds. You just have to talk to them, test them, challenge them, and make them prove themselves to be genuine.

Challenge a Dom and test Him? Yes: absolutely.

(in reply to wantoplease)

Post #: 4

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 5:33:05 AM

biracalsub4wmDom

Posts: 109
Joined: 7/26/2007
From: Illinois
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: wantoplease

My search has left me scared and heartbroken....I have taken ever road and each always leads me back to heartache...There are only a few maybe 3 or 4 that i have talk to hear that seem to be real...Why is the search so hard..Do I have a black cloud over me...

I feel your pain wantoplease.
For me, it isn't so much lying, it's not wanting to give out any real information. And it seems like the ones I REALLY like....ie, the ones who seem the most compatable with me, and the most interresting.... are the ones who give the least information....won't talk on the phone....and don't want to meet. Go figure.

_____________________________

blessings...

biracialsub

***Please respect that I am OWNED & not seeking a Master. Thank You***

(in reply to wantoplease)

Post #: 5

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 5:34:20 AM

Exquemelin

Posts: 113
Joined: 2/2/2007
From: CT
Status: offline

I went on a date with a sub this weekend(quite successful). It was her first meet and at one point the conversation shifted to the fact that she had had meets with a couple of other Doms before. Apparently one was listed at 5 foot 9, and was shorter than her, she's 5 foot 2. The other said he was a non smoker and went to the bathroom at one point and came out reaking of smoke. As far as I know at no point did I lie and if I did it was by accident, as such we're planning our second date.

(in reply to SixFootMaster)

Post #: 6

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 5:41:43 AM

EclipseAbove

Posts: 220
Joined: 8/11/2005
Status: offline

Sorry that you have had a difficult time of it. I don't think there is a black cloud over you. You are just searching on the internet which means you'll have to weed through a lot more "stuff" to find a jewel. Don't let it get you down.

(in reply to wantoplease)

Post #: 7

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 6:24:33 AM

IrishMist

Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline

You have only been here on collarme for about a month... give it some time.

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to wantoplease)

Post #: 8

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 6:34:03 AM

sublizzie

Posts: 1252
Joined: 5/26/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: wantoplease
My search has left me scared and heartbroken....I have taken ever road and each always leads me back to heartache...There are only a few maybe 3 or 4 that i have talk to hear that seem to be real...Why is the search so hard..Do I have a black cloud over me...

First, Dominants are people. People lie. Hence, Dominants lie. So do submissives.

There are people on this site simply to find someone to have sex with and everyone knows that submissives will have sex with anyone at all. None of us are picky about who we have sex with. All of us immediately drop to our knees and give ourselves completely to anyone who'll email us. Blech.

There are good people on this site but it takes time to find them. Some good people will not be a good match for you but they'll make great friends. Do a search for threads about "red flags". Read the threads and take their information to heart. (If you are lucky, LA will give you a list.) That'll help you weed out the ones who aren't worth spending any of your time with.

Just my thoughts.........

_____________________________

"cooking is my kink"

Collared June 19, 2008
(uncollared 12/21/09 with his death. RIP my Santa)

(in reply to wantoplease)

Post #: 9

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 7:03:11 AM

sweetnurseBBW

Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline

Alot of people online lie, it isn't just limited to Doms. The internet is a swinging door for everyone to chime in. Find a local group in or around your area and meet people that way. It takes time both ways to find someone compatible. It is like any other relationship, you have to weed out the dorks and find the gems

_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to wantoplease)

Post #: 10

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 7:04:52 AM

chellekitty

Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sublizzie

First, Dominants are people. People lie. Hence, Dominants lie. So do submissives.

QFT

just because they slap on the title Dominant doesn't all of a sudden cause them to ascend to a level of holiness...they are still human...and just like any cross section of society there are crappy Dominants to go along with the great ones and average ones and lieing ones and truthful ones and skilled ones and inexperienced ones and so forth and so on....

edited to add: and its not just online...its everywhere

< Message edited by chellekitty -- 10/8/2007 7:05:18 AM >

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to sublizzie)

Post #: 11

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 7:16:16 AM

catize

Posts: 3020
Joined: 3/7/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: wantoplease

My search has left me scared and heartbroken....I have taken ever road and each always leads me back to heartache...There are only a few maybe 3 or 4 that i have talk to hear that seem to be real...Why is the search so hard..Do I have a black cloud over me...

First, don't think of them as dominants, think of them as potential dominants. Then, ask lots and lots of questions and take a hard look at the answers. Use your brain and listen to your gut instincts.

_____________________________

"Power is real. But it's a lot less real if it's not perceived as power."
Robert Parker, Stranger in Paradise

(in reply to wantoplease)

Post #: 12

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 7:28:10 AM

Kana

Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline

OK lots of things come to mind when I read your post.
Without going to far into speculation, innuendo etc...this is as most people have pointed out the internet, and it is a site which is involved with sex which means that there are going to be a huge chunk of people lying for a variety of reasons. Players, posers, frauds, wannabes, people who stay at home and wank, power trippers, and just plain people who wish they were somebody else, the net provides a way for sad people to social engineer themselves into a fantasy realm. With that aside, there are a number of people who are real, who understand BDSM and are also searching. As tough as it is for women, it is equally difficult for men. Face the fact that the majority of people you talk to are probably being deceptive and that will help a lot. Leading with hope and the heart can be a dangerous move in these woods. In general I presume that anyone I am talking to is lying until I meet her. That sounds cold and hard, buts it’s based in hard experience. The feedback you have gotten is good. Domination has less to do than what a person can do with a flogger and more to do with their character. How can someone ask for respect unless they have earned it and how can they ask for trust unless they are trustworthy? And lets right now qualify lying simply as communicating with intent to deceive, whether by omission or commission. Personally if I feel a connection I try to arrange a face-to-face meet fairly quickly. It’s astounding how many people have sudden emergencies when they are supposed to meet someone from the net. I have heard heart attacks, mothers dying, work emergencies; I lost my wallet, and so many others. The funny thing is that in vanilla, in real life, I have never had someone miss a first date, its just not done.

The good thing is that if they are lying and you find out quickly, you have just saved yourself a whole lot of trouble and potential pain. It’s easier that way all around. I understand where you are coming from, I remember when I first got on here how hopeful I was those first few contacts, and how disappointing it was when they didn’t turn up, or were far from the picture they had painted through words. In this realm it’s easy to let emotions run ahead of logic, our hearts see what they want to see and ignore the warning signs. Stick through it, I have met some amazing people on this site, good friends, good submissives, its been worth the experience. Nothing good comes easy. Try your local BDSM chapter, that way you can scope out who is there and who is not, and also get to know other subs, they can tell you who is real and who is not. Good luck to you in your search.

(in reply to chellekitty)

Post #: 13

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 7:37:05 AM

ehlovindom

Posts: 248
Joined: 1/23/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: wantoplease
Why Are so many Doms Untruthful?
My search has left me scared and heartbroken....I have taken ever road and each always leads me back to heartache...There are only a few maybe 3 or 4 that i have talk to hear that seem to be real...Why is the search so hard..Do I have a black cloud over me...

Well that is some generalization "wantoplease", kinda like me saying why do all subs claim they want that "special" master but in fact end up with those who abuse them.

Like anyone seeking a relationship, you are going to come across those men who lie, cheat and possibly steal. Just grab your weedwhacker and weed out those who do. Not to be mean here, but have you thought about those men you have met which have left you so heartbroken? Can you detect any patterns in the characteristics of them?

And unless you made an error in your profile, you are married and that isn't going to make your search any easier.

_____________________________

Know which bridge to build, which one to cross, and which one to burn!

(in reply to wantoplease)

Post #: 14

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 7:52:37 AM

Guest123

Posts: 58
Joined: 9/6/2007
Status: offline

i wanted to say that i find american men in general more dishonest, but after reading the post of others, i will have to just say the men that i've met here in america have been less than honest, mostly because they don't know what they really want and have learned to play games with women. (and plenty of women do playing games with the minds of men as well)

i was brought up with men that spoke their mind to women non matter how painful it might be to the woman. if they wanted something, or felt something, you did not have to guess, you were told.... here,... it's so confusing, i am not sure if it is the language bearer or if people just gloss over their feelings with empty words, because they are afraid they will be rejected. i think that is why most people lie, that and maybe the fear of being punished....

i am still trying to figure out what one Dom's intentions are, we met once, seemed to hit it off, he never contacted me in person again, but every few weeks, i get an email saying he wants to collar me,.... then nothing.... if i was not such a shy girl, i might tell him the phrase i have heard more than once.. to "put up or shut up... " but, i say nothing.....maybe silence is a lie too?

(in reply to ehlovindom)

Post #: 15

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 7:55:17 AM

domiguy

Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline

Yes. You have a black cloud hanging over you.....It must suck to be you. It's one thing to have to wear a condom everytime ya wanna get busy.....It would really blow to have to get geared up like The Gorton's Fisherman just to hang out with you for awhile....Best just to tap it and run.....(Domiguy, right after cuming, springs off of wantoplease...Points at the clouds gathering above her) "Damn woman! Can you smell it?....A real Nor'easter is approaching....Haven't seen the likes of this since the fall of aught four....Pull up your bloomers lil' lady...And find you some high ground."...."Stay alive! I will find you!!!"

_____________________________

(in reply to ehlovindom)

Post #: 16

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 8:09:41 AM

Aileen68

Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline

It may have something to do with the fact that you're married.
You will most likely only attract other married people. Someone who is single and looking for a ltr will pass you by.

(in reply to wantoplease)

Post #: 17

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 8:14:02 AM

biracalsub4wmDom

Posts: 109
Joined: 7/26/2007
From: Illinois
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: domiguy

Yes. You have a black cloud hanging over you.....It must suck to be you. It's one thing to have to wear a condom everytime ya wanna get busy.....It would really blow to have to get geared up like The Gorton's Fisherman just to hang out with you for awhile....Best just to tap it and run.....(Domiguy, right after cuming, springs off of wantoplease...Points at the clouds gathering above her) "Damn woman! Can you smell it?....A real Nor'easter is approaching....Haven't seen the likes of this since the fall of aught four....Pull up your bloomers lil' lady...And find you some high ground."...."Stay alive! I will find you!!!"

Oh My Goodness!
This is the funniest thing I've read on here all day!! hahaha

thanks...I needed that.

PS...love the Tupac avitar. What a HOTTIE! :)

_____________________________

blessings...

biracialsub

***Please respect that I am OWNED & not seeking a Master. Thank You***

(in reply to domiguy)

Post #: 18

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 8:18:50 AM

domiguy

Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen68

It may have something to do with the fact that you're married.
You will most likely only attract other married people. Someone who is single and looking for a ltr will pass you by.

Do I get to fuck her husband as well? Or is he unaware of her dishonest activities? Why are there so many dishonest subs? Aileen batton down your hatches...A nor'easter approaches.....Would hate for it to blow up your skirt....All of that Italian hair is just so fucking goddam gross!! You do have some of the nicest hatches on CM.

< Message edited by domiguy -- 10/8/2007 8:20:36 AM >

_____________________________

(in reply to Aileen68)

Post #: 19

RE: Why Are so many Doms Untruthful - 10/8/2007 8:22:03 AM

Rushemery

Posts: 310
Joined: 9/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: bluesteel762x51

You have no black cloud, my sweet lady. ANYTIME you venture into the computer world, expect lies, and deceit. This site is free, so therefore when you open a window all the way, some bugs are going to fly in. Just learn to not jump early and do not lead with your lust.

This is the best way I have ever heard it put it made me laugh like hell

(in reply to bluesteel762x51)

Post #: 20

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