RE: Dear Kinky Abbey

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seeksfemslave -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/26/2007 3:23:53 PM)
With regard to Silvars high speed Racoon there exists in the UK a chicken that is capable of running at 125mph. It's meat is so succulent and it is so easy to breed all the dopey Liberal experts think that it should eliminate hunger in the world within about 5 years. If they can be brought together in a closed space the Hens are nymphomaniacs and produce 10 fertilised eggs per hour and the cocks are well just insatiable cocksmen. who view it as their lifes mission to impregnate as many Hens as possible. The only problem is no one can round up the little fukkers. Is this the dark face of Darwinism at work? No doubt Kinky Abby will know. lol

servantheart -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/26/2007 3:44:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: seeksfemslave Am I CM's first genuine lunatic ? Hardly. In fact, I think You are a nice person, Seeks. [sm=flowers.gif]

probablyknowme -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/26/2007 4:15:11 PM)
Dear Kinky Abbey, I am writing to you cause I did something terribly naughty today, and I just know I am going to get into BIG trouble. I hid my Master's cane in the umbrella stand, his flogger in the UM's toybox, and used his clamps to hold my youngest's science project together. Now, I am thinking that he might not believe that the cat did it, so any advice that you might have would be appreciated. Waiting for Master to come home, kat

cautiousiasub -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/26/2007 7:51:24 PM)
probablyknowme, I know I am not the all-knowing kinky Abbey, but I felt I would offer my advice. You could try to hurry and put them all back. If it's too late for that and he is already home, just tell him that you thought it would be fnu to have a treasure hunt. Either that, or the house was over-run by poltergeists (sp?) while he was away. Be warned, if you use this one, it must be said with a straight face, and I'm not guaranteeing it's going to work even then. If all else fails, you will just have to deal with the consequences of your actions. [;)] I will say, that if at all humanly possible, wait for Abbey's advice before taking mine. She is at work at the moment, and she has commented to me several times to help her respond to some of your questions when she is unavailable. I've tried telling her that her advice would be so much better, but she never listens to me. Oh, and... Dear Kinky Abbey, I think I just gave some really horrible advice. What should I do? Hugs!! cautious

NLitendLady -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/26/2007 10:21:07 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: seeksfemslave Dear Kinky Abby Glad to see that you handled Gretchen H with a firm hand but I am puzzled. Since no one else has been on my computer I can only assume that Gretchen is in fact me. I have no recollection of making that post and when I mentioned what had happened to my shrink she said not only am I Oedipal I have multiple personality disorder as well. So my question is this Abby, since you began advising me I appear to have got worse. Is that supposed to happen.? In order to be healed and become merged and live a normal life you must first become aware that you have other personalities. So maybe, this has been helping. Seeks I could not bear it and would have to disappear forever, never to see you or another human if I were to have caused you harm. Am I CM's first genuine lunatic ?First? Hell no. One of may yes. lol Seeks you've finally joined the rest of us.

NLitendLady -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/26/2007 10:24:19 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: subtee Why? Why is everyone always picking on Iowa? Caucus envy??? ~singing, oh, come and see, come dance with me, to the beautiful iowa waltz~ Hmm word association.... Caucus leads to politics which leads to campaigning which leads to politicians which leads to lying pricks.... Caucus envy... similar to penis envy??? Either that or Caucus, caca? politicians.. pieces of shit....

NLitendLady -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/26/2007 10:31:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: seeksfemslave With regard to Silvars high speed Racoon there exists in the UK a chicken that is capable of running at 125mph. It's meat is so succulent and it is so easy to breed all the dopey Liberal experts think that it should eliminate hunger in the world within about 5 years. If they can be brought together in a closed space the Hens are nymphomaniacs (hmmm I resemble this term) and produce 10 fertilised eggs per hour and the cocks are well just insatiable cocksmen (would like to find one of these). who view it as their lifes mission to impregnate as many Hens as possible. The only problem is no one can round up the little fukkers. Is this the dark face of Darwinism at work? Darwinism? not likely. More the dark face of imbreeding and/or specialized breeding to make someone a large amount of money.They just need to find out how to catch them so they can enjoy. No doubt Kinky Abby will know. lol

NLitendLady -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/26/2007 10:36:09 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: probablyknowme Dear Kinky Abbey, I am writing to you cause I did something terribly naughty today, and I just know I am going to get into BIG trouble. I hid my Master's cane in the umbrella stand, his flogger in the UM's toybox, and used his clamps to hold my youngest's science project together. Now, I am thinking that he might not believe that the cat did it, so any advice that you might have would be appreciated. First of all, you need to find out what pushed you over the edge into this behavior. Figure out why you did it. Then you need to see if you can find a way to fix things before he comes home and then you need to really really be ready for some of his favorite activities. Kneel naked or lie prostrate and beg for mercy. The cat story is no good. Waiting for Master to come home, kat

NLitendLady -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/26/2007 10:39:06 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: cautiousiasub probablyknowme, I know I am not the all-knowing kinky Abbey, but I felt I would offer my advice. You could try to hurry and put them all back. If it's too late for that and he is already home, just tell him that you thought it would be fnu to have a treasure hunt. Either that, or the house was over-run by poltergeists (sp?) while he was away. Be warned, if you use this one, it must be said with a straight face, and I'm not guaranteeing it's going to work even then. If all else fails, you will just have to deal with the consequences of your actions. [;)] I will say, that if at all humanly possible, wait for Abbey's advice before taking mine. She is at work at the moment, and she has commented to me several times to help her respond to some of your questions when she is unavailable. I've tried telling her that her advice would be so much better, but she never listens to me. Oh, and... Dear Kinky Abbey, I think I just gave some really horrible advice. What should I do?lol It was not horrible not really anyway. I don't know it all just have some good resources lol. You should keep thinking and working on it you'll get better. Just need to keep you having sessions regularly so your mind doesn't go schizo. remember I luv ya Hugs!! cautious

probablyknowme -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/26/2007 11:20:38 PM)
Dear Kinky Abbey, Okay Master came home, and I did what you suggested, and met him kneeling nekkid at the door. He came in and tripped over the umbrella stand that I had accidentally left in the way when I put the cane in it. I tried not to laugh as he laid sprawled rather indignantly beside my nekkid self, really I did...I confessed prettily to what I did, and he got that LOOK on his face. He told me to go get the things that I'd hidden, and I had to dump out the toybox, cause somehow the flogger wound up on the bottom. When he came into the room to find out what was taking so long, he tripped over the rollerskate that had somehow gotten away from me...When he finally got up off the floor, with much appologizing on my part, he told me to go get the clamps. I took the clamps off of the science experiment, and honestly, who woulda thunk that taking that divider out would cause such a mess with smoke filling up the room??? I musta made some kinda noise cause here comes Master, except he can't see through the haze and ran into the doorframe, and fell on his behind... Now Master is on his way to the hospital to have x-rays, and I am still kneeling nekkid by the door waiting for him to come home...What should I do now? Waiting for some kind of advice, kat

cautiousiasub -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/27/2007 6:02:49 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: NLitendLady lol It was not horrible not really anyway. I don't know it all just have some good resources lol. You should keep thinking and working on it you'll get better. Just need to keep you having sessions regularly so your mind doesn't go schizo. remember I luv ya I only answered because you were at work and I was concerned she wouldn't get any advice before he came home. Don't get used to it, that really made my brain hurt, lol. Regular sessions? Awww, now you're just teasing me. Besides that, it's too late, regular sessions don't seem to by in my vocabulary...or his for that matter...life gets in the way so easily.

seeksfemslave -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/27/2007 6:11:29 AM)
Dear Kinky Abby I am thinking that maybe you and Cautious are one and the same person. I think those groundhogs may be getting the upper hand, or should I say trotter. Do groundhogs like to lol about in shit with a big smile on their faces like ordinary pigs do ? What is a groundhog anyway....the Iowan state mascot ? Bit like the British Bulldog only better looking and dont slobber so much ?

cautiousiasub -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/27/2007 7:16:20 AM)
Seeks, I would post pics of a groundhog on here for you, but I don't know how. Do you have any suggestions for me? If I could figure that out, I could even prove I am not Kinky Abbey. cautious

Silvar -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/27/2007 8:56:03 AM)
sighs Finally got out of the woods and back to some form of civilization. Duck man told me that a flashlight would fend off all the animals in the woods, but he didn't tell me that I had to wait at the last minute for them to come right up to my face, turn on the light and go "Boo!" Took me three days to figure that out. shrugs Anyways, I after getting out of the woods, I came into a small farm area located in the wilderness where they were holding a business of letting tourists canoe down the river. I declined the offer since I'm not much for adrenaline rush, and the guy sitting on the porch playing his banjo in a familiar tune gave me the creeps. Hrm... Reminds me of some some movie... Oh well. -Silvar

NLitendLady -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/27/2007 12:16:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: probablyknowme Dear Kinky Abbey, Okay Master came home, and I did what you suggested, and met him kneeling nekkid at the door. He came in and tripped over the umbrella stand that I had accidentally left in the way when I put the cane in it. I tried not to laugh as he laid sprawled rather indignantly beside my nekkid self, really I did...I confessed prettily to what I did, and he got that LOOK on his face. He told me to go get the things that I'd hidden, and I had to dump out the toybox, cause somehow the flogger wound up on the bottom. When he came into the room to find out what was taking so long, he tripped over the rollerskate that had somehow gotten away from me...When he finally got up off the floor, with much appologizing on my part, he told me to go get the clamps. I took the clamps off of the science experiment, and honestly, who woulda thunk that taking that divider out would cause such a mess with smoke filling up the room??? I musta made some kinda noise cause here comes Master, except he can't see through the haze and ran into the doorframe, and fell on his behind... Now Master is on his way to the hospital to have x-rays, and I am still kneeling nekkid by the door waiting for him to come home...What should I do now? Waiting for some kind of advice, kat I'm not sure how much help I can be here. I suggest cleaning the house and making certain all clutter is removed. I also suggest you decide if this is really for you and how much you want to stay with your Master. I strongly suggest you be ready to take care of your Master in a very loving manner focusing on HIS favorite things. I'd be psyching myself up for the discipline I see coming. Can you say SEVERE? Or you could run very fast, very far to somewhere he'd never go. Remember play toys for adults have no place other than where than can be easily accessed and used by adults. They are to be kept always out of reach of children and out of public areas. A Dom's toys should never be hidden, but always nearby in a place he can find them. Children's toys should be kept at all times away from adult's feet and away from where they could become a danger. I have to ask, since you seem to have some subconscious desire to put him in harms way and to irritate him, do you have some repressed anger towards him? or Are you a masochistic person who craves punishment? Are you a bratty sub who wants attention and to test him? Do you have a death wish?

NLitendLady -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/27/2007 12:21:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: seeksfemslave Dear Kinky Abby I am thinking that maybe you and Cautious are one and the same person.We are a lot alike in many ways but we are definitely different. She's like me years ago but then again she is significantly younger. I think those groundhogs may be getting the upper hand, or should I say trotter.They will never win. I promise that. Do groundhogs like to lol about in shit with a big smile on their faces like ordinary pigs do ?No they like to go to Cautious' house and cause trouble lol. What is a groundhog anyway....the Iowan state mascot ? It's an oversized furry cross between a rat and a dog. Iowa does not have a mascot unless you count corn or the Hawkeyes lol. (To you cyclone fans, Iowa is known as the Hawkeye state after all) Bit like the British Bulldog only better looking and dont slobber so much ? They are kinda cute and their face isn't smushed. I don't think they slobber but I don't like to get close cause they can inflict pretty serious damage when provoked, not quite as bad as a raccoon but serious still.

NLitendLady -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/27/2007 12:24:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Silvar sighs Finally got out of the woods and back to some form of civilization. Duck man told me that a flashlight would fend off all the animals in the woods, but he didn't tell me that I had to wait at the last minute for them to come right up to my face, turn on the light and go "Boo!" Took me three days to figure that out. shrugslol At least you are learning good survival skills. Anyways, I after getting out of the woods, I came into a small farm area located in the wilderness where they were holding a business of letting tourists canoe down the river. I declined the offer since I'm not much for adrenaline rush, and the guy sitting on the porch playing his banjo in a familiar tune gave me the creeps. Hrm... Reminds me of some some movie... Oh well.LOL Deliverance meets Iowa. We are not quite so hillbillyesque in Iowa. The river and it's people not nearly as dangerous as say um the children of the corn. So watch the cornfields not the river for danger. Then there is always that lovely field of dreams. lol We'll have to give you the grand tour of Iowa someday. -Silvar

NLitendLady -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/27/2007 12:28:02 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: cautiousiasub Seeks, I would post pics of a groundhog on here for you, but I don't know how. Do you have any suggestions for me? If I could figure that out, I could even prove I am not Kinky Abbey. cautious I might be able to figure it out. How would you prove you are not me? We should get a pic of us together somedaylol.

NLitendLady -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/27/2007 12:30:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: cautiousiasub quote: ORIGINAL: NLitendLady lol It was not horrible not really anyway. I don't know it all just have some good resources lol. You should keep thinking and working on it you'll get better. Just need to keep you having sessions regularly so your mind doesn't go schizo. remember I luv ya I only answered because you were at work and I was concerned she wouldn't get any advice before he came home. That was very thoughtful of you.Don't get used to it, that really made my brain hurt, lol.With regular use your brain would not hurt like that lol. Regular sessions? Awww, now you're just teasing me. lol I love to tease. Besides that, it's too late, regular sessions don't seem to by in my vocabulary...or his for that matter...life gets in the way so easily.Well we will have to work on that.

cautiousiasub -> RE: Dear Kinky Abbey (10/27/2007 1:25:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: NLitendLady I might be able to figure it out. How would you prove you are not me? We should get a pic of us together somedaylol. First of all, that someone thinks you and I are the same person either says scary things about me, or scary things about you. I wonder which, lol. Getting a pic of us together would be difficult. Who would hold the camera?

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