Update... (Full Version)

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submissfifi -> Update... (10/18/2007 5:13:59 AM)

Hi,

Following on from the whole not allowed to contact Sir post. I went to speak with him the day I was supposed to, only to straight away be accused of being a day early, which I was not. He never talked to me about it, why I behaved that way, nothing. Just that did I want to be owned by him, and that he was waiting on me. Well now that really is ironic, when after setting up a fake profile on facebook, to which he denied using, he was flirting with fake me. I always had a vibe I was one of many, and that he was never really that interested.

Next came his profile here, saying how he hadn't meet that someone, and hoped to find it here. How very charming, two weeks no contact with me, whilst he resumes his search for that someone! It gets better, when I asked, note the word asked, not confronted, apparently someone had logged in and changed his profile, how bizzare, and then he said he hasn't used it in months, well thats funny he was looking at my profile 3 days ago, and oh look he logged in a few hours ago too. Wow that hacker is good. I mean come on, credit me with some intelligence, yeah I maybe submissive sexually, but I'm not stupid. Oh I will change it, I will delete it, well there was last night to do that, and first thing this morning when he logged in! Yet it still remains.

Then theres sending fake me a photo in a dare via facebook, something which I had asked from him for months, yet a complete stranger on facebook gets it straight away. Theres going on a diet, theres exercising for him, theres doing everything I possible could for him, theres investing my time and energy in him, theres the fact I commited to him. Yet all along I was played. Yeah yell at me for entrapment, or underhand tatics, but was I wrong? no I wasn't? He was never interested in me, never even attracted to me, being describe in a photograph as summery really didn't cut it either.

Theres the whole speech about how a relationship should be built on honesty. I was always honest with him, (yeah mention the fake profile) but the whole reason the fake profile exisit was because I couldn't bare two weeks without talking to him. Yeah pathetic, sad, old me. What a sucker hey. And if you all think for one minute I'm happy, I'm not. A guy, a dominat guy that I was very attracted to, who I did everything I could possibly do for, who I had commited too, has broken my trust, my respect,but most importantly my heart.

And not one word of an apology.  

So I know he maybe few and far between. But why do I feel such a fool?




MissMagnolia -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 5:16:28 AM)

Bagging a master? Good way to not to get back in the good books.[8|]



laurell3 -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 5:17:11 AM)

well...at least you know now.  It's hard when someone plays you, I've been there, feeling foolish on top of hurt feelings is alot to deal with.  Take a break, work on you, when you're ready, start over, one bad apple....well you know the rest....
Sorry it ended that way...but at least you're not agonizing anymore.



submissfifi -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 5:18:25 AM)

Whats bagging a master mean exactly? Oh did I forget to mention the fact he was far more prepared to meet the fake profile on facebook, to someone he had chatted to for months.

What makes you think I even want to be in his good books? He lied!

How can I trust him now?



laurell3 -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 5:19:44 AM)

neither of you can trust each other now....move on, it's done by your own statements



MissMagnolia -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 5:20:45 AM)

You can't, but bagging him isn't going to help you get over it and find another master. Any who see that you bagged one out isn't likely to put much trust in you.

You were dishonest in making another profile and talking to him as if you were someone else. He isn't the only dishonest person in this.



submissfifi -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 5:21:50 AM)

Thank you laurell3, if he is sitting at his desk thinking how much I enjoyed any of this, then he is wrong. The really sad thing is, if he said sorry I don't know what I would do. God why did I put so much of my feelings into this. Yeah I have myself to blame. Don't worry, I'm no longer on here looking for a dom, I need one hell of a break from this.




submissfifi -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 5:25:01 AM)

I didn't say I wasn't the only dishonest person. But I never flirted with, talked to another man, or dom. I commited myself to him. He wasn't commited to me.

I don't care really if other masters see this, as far as I feel right now I don't want another master/dominant any where near me.

I'm sorry for what I did, but I'm not getting into a relationship with someone who wants to own me, and expects my commitment when they don't give it in return. Or does it not work like that? a dom owns u, but is free to continue looking for that someone?



laurell3 -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 5:31:17 AM)

woah nelly...slow down.....his dishonesty doesn't make all Doms dishonest, yours doesn't make all subs dishonest either.  Unless you want to swear off sex and relationships all together forever, you're going to have to sort through dishonest people kinky, vanilla, dom, sub, purple giraffes....take a break and pamper yourself and get beyond this, don't let it warp your perspective on everyone.  Life sucks sometimes...lemons....lemonade..you know this one too...



came4U -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 5:35:51 AM)

You were played by a loser.  Point is, if you have learned from this experience to not let it happen again.  Hopefully so.

We all make mistakes, perhaps he said the right things at the right time and you swooned to him. But, that time out phase was merely because he was sick of you and of course he was moving on the entire time.

He will probably still be a jackass and attempt to bother you in other ways because it seems he just never grew up.  My old advice? For a long while, do not respond to any new profiles created within the past month or so just to be safe.

best of luck, I feel badly for ya.



submissfifi -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 5:40:12 AM)

I never said everyone was like this, I said it was few and far between. But the thought of any other dom just isn't exactly what I need. Deep down I still want him, why god only knows.  I know that there are some dishonest people out there. I know life can be hard when people break your trust. I have taken a break. Do u think what I did was bad? I didn't enjoy it, but at the same time he would never have told me.



laurell3 -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 5:42:22 AM)

"good" "bad"...what does it matter?  Stop looking for fault and move forward.  If you go back to this guy after this debacle, that would be "bad".  Figure out what happened and how you ended up in the situation if you can so you can learn from it, don't blame, learn.



submissfifi -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 5:44:05 AM)

Thanks for the words of comfort. But why didn't I know these things, you reckon the two week no contact thing was because he never wanted me. Why is life this cruel? what did I do to deserve this? I gave him everything and he was laughing at me the whole time.



laurell3 -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 5:45:42 AM)

You're never going to know the answers to these questions....beating your head against a wall isn't going to help you....take a nap, walk, run, exercise, eat ice cream...stop obessing and get some perspective.  In 10 years you won't remember this guy's name.



MrDiscipline44 -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 6:02:05 AM)

Oh my God, what a fuckin drama queen. So you created a fake profile to circumvent your masters order of no contact and then started flirting with him. Now your angry because he flirted back? You got what you deserved. You were probably very different on your fake profile then how your are normally. Creating a "grass is greener" effect. Hell, I don't even know you and can already tell a fake you is better then the real you. Look, you played stupid games and burned yourself. Get over it and learn that playing games will hurt you as much as anyone else.



SimplyMichael -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 6:04:06 AM)

Why do you choose bad partners?



submissfifi -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 6:19:54 AM)

I agree whole heartedly with what you have said. But answer me one thing how long was I supposed to be treated in this way? when I was supposedly owned by him, whilst he continued searching for someone else. If I was not good enough then he should have said and let me go. For which I have apologised for. Not that it will change anything for him. But I didn't flirt with him any differently. I was myself. I was hoping he would have noticed. But that wasn't my intention.

What I cannot understand is he owned me but wasn't even commited to me. Do u think that is fair? How would you feel if you were commited to someone who was openly flirting and arranging to meet up with other girls/boys, whatever your preference.



submissfifi -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 6:25:23 AM)

Good question, although things are very messed up, and I doubt he will never contact me again. But I did really, do still like him, u can't help your feelings. (I know its stupid)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

Why do you choose bad partners?



CutieMouse -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 7:20:23 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: submissfifi

Good question, although things are very messed up, and I doubt he will never contact me again. But I did really, do still like him, u can't help your feelings. (I know its stupid)

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

Why do you choose bad partners?



You don't need him to contact you again to sit back and explore why you chose him, why you remained faithful to him, why you ignored the red flags with him.

You made a poor choice in a partner, and apparently got very emotionally attached, very early... Given that we can only control our own behaviour, this might be a good opportunity to explore your behaviour, so that you'll be less likely to make the same mistake twice.



MrDiscipline44 -> RE: Update... (10/18/2007 7:22:23 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: submissfifi

I agree whole heartedly with what you have said. But answer me one thing how long was I supposed to be treated in this way?
For as long as you thought he should put up with how you admitted to treating him in your past threads.
quote:

when I was supposedly owned by him, whilst he continued searching for someone else.
Was he searching for someone else? Were you able access his account and see the list of women that he was in contact with? Or did you just create a fake account, started flirting with and assumed the rest?
quote:

If I was not good enough then he should have said and let me go.
True, this I do agree with.
quote:

For which I have apologised for. Not that it will change anything for him. But I didn't flirt with him any differently. I was myself. I was hoping he would have noticed. But that wasn't my intention.
The intention you may have had has become very convoluted.

quote:

What I cannot understand is he owned me but wasn't even commited to me. Do u think that is fair?
Sweetheart, life isn't fair sometimes. Is it fair that you lied to him? Is it fair that you let your mouth run amok and then tried to excuse it with PMT?
quote:

How would you feel if you were commited to someone who was openly flirting and arranging to meet up with other girls/boys, whatever your preference.
If you're so narrowminded as to think that flirting constitutes cheating then you might want to rethink your reasoning for being in a relationship.

Look, on the whole, I'm not condoning this guys passive-agressive attempt to get rid of you or any other actions he took. But I'm not going to condone your actions either. Nor will you garner any simpathy from me for your relationship debacle. You both had equal share in its destruction. Coming on here and trashing him shows me that you aren't adult enough to take responsibility for your actions or be in a relationship with.



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