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RE: Email privacy - 10/21/2007 8:10:14 PM

grlneedstolearn

Posts: 728
Joined: 1/29/2007
Status: offline

First off for me, i would never give out my pw to anyone. i can not speak for others who do give out their pw in real time to their Dom/Domme so i can not respond to that question. But, my Dom has never asked me for my pw nor do i think he ever will in part because he does not care who i correspond with; he actually encourages it. But back to the topic at hand, that would immediantly raise red flags for me and i would let him know that i'm not comfortable giving out my pw to him. If he can't accept it, move on and he's not the right guy for you, or he may i don't know.

(in reply to RubyStiletto)

Post #: 21

RE: Email privacy - 10/21/2007 8:25:09 PM

slaveluci

Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie
I've offered my Master my email password before. He didn't want it. I tend to assume when talking to a slave friend, however, that the slave's owner may have access to what I have written to him/her. Because of my views on slavery, I would not feel my privacy was violated if a slave friend's owner read what I sent. On the same token, those I converse with know that while my Master does not actively go into my accounts, he is privy to anything in those accounts. It is not uncommon for me to share emails with him, just like I sometimes relay phone conversations with him - those I think he would be interested in.

Ditto, ownedgirlie

. When we first came to CM as a couple, my profile stated that He read all my mail and didn't want other doms contacting me. It was eventually revised because He ended up never reading any mail except when I specifically showed Him something interesting. He knows some passwords because we created log-ins/accounts together but He has never asked for my Yahoo passwords to email accounts I had long before I even knew Him. He is privy, as you say, but He just has no desire to know. He trusts me and that's a beautiful feeling

.................luci

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to ownedgirlie)

Post #: 22

RE: Email privacy - 10/21/2007 8:28:15 PM

slaveluci

Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross
My partner and I have all passwords, pins, bank statements, family and friends phone numbers and addresses. But then we live together and try and be practical about what could happen and it's just silly for him not to have my moms phone number so they can talk about what to get me for my birthday and stuff :)

We share bank accounts, pins, numbers and all that stuff too. He knows exactly how to contact all my family and my best friend in WV. As I mentioned above, He just doesn't care to have my email passwords and that's His choice. As far as me choosing to keep anything private, I certainly don't. And, as you say LA, they have to talk about what to get me

...................luci

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 23

RE: Email privacy - 10/22/2007 12:52:32 AM

mya75

Posts: 300
Joined: 10/14/2007
Status: offline

I definately wouldnt give my email and passwords to anyone that I wasnt in a 24/7 Live in relationship with and even then I think it would take months for me to hand over simple passwords to things like hotmail and yahoo....In order for me to pass out other info such as banks we would have to be sharing finances or he would have to be the sole provider in the house...now sites like collarme and alt I would more than likely give up once I was under a collar of consideration...

(in reply to chiaThePet)

Post #: 24

RE: Email privacy - 10/22/2007 2:47:00 AM

RubyStiletto

Posts: 2
Joined: 10/1/2007
Status: offline

Thanks to all of you for your thoughts and advice. You've given me a lot to think about and for us to discuss before deciding if we want to move ahead.

(in reply to grlneedstolearn)

Post #: 25

RE: Email privacy - 10/22/2007 6:32:44 AM

Celeste43

Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline

I would never give that out to someone I don't know. If and when your relationship progresses to that point is one thing, but to some guy you've only exchanged emails with? No way. You do realize he could change the password and lock you out. He could send emails to your friends pretending to be you in order to break off your relationship. He hasn't earned that yet and it shocks me that he thinks he can demand it without meriting such trust.

(in reply to chiaThePet)

Post #: 26

RE: Email privacy - 10/22/2007 11:03:48 AM

nephandi

Posts: 4470
Joined: 9/23/2005
From: Cold and magickal Norway in a town near Bergen!
Status: offline

Hi

my Master and i live together and he is far more computer savvy than me so he have a few of my passwords, some he have asked for some he have not but we have been together for years.

What bothers me about what you speak of is that this man you have known for only a few weeks you do not know him at all. Now a Collarme profile is not the most valuable thing in the world and as long as you inform pepole someone else is reading the mail and delete mails that are sensitive sure you can hand that over if you want, but do you really want that, it seam this man want to much far to soon. A few weeks why should he have any sort of control over you so early?

Added: Or did you mean it was not your collarme mail but your mail accounts that he wanted your password for? i would not give him that before you know him way better.

i wish you well

< Message edited by nephandi -- 10/22/2007 11:07:31 AM >

_____________________________

Whatever you think you can do or believe you can do, begin it. Action has magic, grace and power in it.--Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Futon torpedoes, make love not war!--Aswad

(in reply to RubyStiletto)

Post #: 27

RE: Email privacy - 10/22/2007 1:47:51 PM

SweetSarijane

Posts: 3788
Joined: 10/7/2005
From: KC area Missouri
Status: offline

It's one thing to give passwords to someone you are involved with face to face and know well and trust, it's something totally different to give passwords and account access to someone you've never met.

I echo what Celeste43 said above and add to that, that he could even pretend to be you and try to use your account to attract other women as well or any one of a number of things he came up with. You just don't know what a stranger would do.

_____________________________

Sarah2
Deviant Mind
Wild Side Readers KCSass

(in reply to nephandi)

Post #: 28

RE: Email privacy - 10/22/2007 1:51:19 PM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

Passwords?

Here is the jingle you need to remember:

I you ain't blowin' him,
he's not knowin' them.

the bill is in the mail.

Ron

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to SweetSarijane)

Post #: 29

RE: Email privacy - 10/22/2007 1:53:38 PM

colouredin

Posts: 4279
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline

I havent ever given my password to my main account and never would but my ex created a special email account for me which i had to use to mail him and im him on, it just made sure when he said full attention i was giving it him, he had a similar set up himself and it was very good due to it being long distence it gave me a sense of closeness. :D

(in reply to mnottertail)

Post #: 30

RE: Email privacy - 10/22/2007 2:26:47 PM

SweetSarijane

Posts: 3788
Joined: 10/7/2005
From: KC area Missouri
Status: offline

Ron,

You have such a way of putting things <grin>.

_____________________________

Sarah2
Deviant Mind
Wild Side Readers KCSass

(in reply to mnottertail)

Post #: 31

RE: Email privacy - 10/22/2007 2:31:12 PM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

yah, it should have said if....
I have a way of putting, but not of typing.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to SweetSarijane)

Post #: 32

RE: Email privacy - 10/22/2007 3:47:54 PM

wisteriaV

Posts: 438
Joined: 3/17/2005
Status: offline

OMG chia that was priceless hugsz!

_____________________________

Every story has two sides , much like a coin and neither one is totally perfect.
If it doesn't float your boat, then don't get in the water~!

(in reply to chiaThePet)

Post #: 33

RE: Email privacy - 10/22/2007 5:34:08 PM

SweetSarijane

Posts: 3788
Joined: 10/7/2005
From: KC area Missouri
Status: offline

Your keyboard is probably related to mine lol. Mine has attitude with me regularly.

_____________________________

Sarah2
Deviant Mind
Wild Side Readers KCSass

(in reply to mnottertail)

Post #: 34

RE: Email privacy - 10/22/2007 7:57:54 PM

gentlestarZR

Posts: 49
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline

quote:

That would be easily fixed by adding "My owner reads all my mail" to your profile, and making sure any friends you chat with here understand that as well. While a person may be comfortable telling you something, that does not mean they are comfortable telling him.

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: RubyStiletto

As I said, I don't have anything to hide but would I be violating the privacy of people who have emailed me, especially if they don't know he has access?

That would be easily fixed by adding "My owner reads all my mail" to your profile, and making sure any friends you chat with here understand that as well. While a person may be comfortable telling you something, that does not mean they are comfortable telling him.

i dont agree with that anything i hear form my friends i let my Master know anyways so he knows whats going on in all parts of my life .. my friends tell me things bu i talk to my love about whats going on in thier lives too they are important to me .. so i let him know about all parts of my life down to the lil gossips going around at work :}

forgot to mention Master has access to my accounts and ya know i love him in my email account he orgaizes it and junks the junk mail for me and its always neat and tidy now lol ..

< Message edited by gentlestarZR -- 10/22/2007 8:00:08 PM >

(in reply to AquaticSub)

Post #: 35

RE: Email privacy - 10/22/2007 9:24:48 PM

Michaelsangel

Posts: 49
Joined: 10/15/2007
From: Portland Oregon
Status: offline

i discussed this issue tonight with my Dom. He said that in His opinion trust has to be developed in order for that to happen even in the real world. He also reminded me that it wasn't until after we had been together for two or three months that he had access to my e-mail accounts and that was only because i became seriously ill and He had to contact my friends and family.

i normally don't go against what a Dom or Master wishes for their sub or slave but under these circumstances, if you decide to give Him access to your e-mail accounts, i would set up a new one strictly for family and close friends so you have some kind of safety net.

respectfully,
Michaelsangel

(in reply to RubyStiletto)

Post #: 36

RE: Email privacy - 10/23/2007 1:31:05 AM

brightspot

Posts: 3052
Status: offline

I wouldn't do it for an on-line connection.
I might with a RL Domina, if that was what she wanted.
My ex Domina didn't ask it of me, we really had an open
honest relationship and she trusted me to be truthful of anything she asked.
She also knew the importance and value of my having my own outlet in conversing with other people, for me and for herself.

Missy.

_____________________________

"Comedy is NOT Pretty!" ~Peter Nelson

But..."May at Least One person have a sense of Humor!" ~KML.

http://360.yahoo.com/my_profile-TD4TwEw8crWS3GHFDcs_DK1rHmW6Dq_E;_ylt=Av2PfG9gH0wkQrMPivuMCivGAOJ3

(in reply to RubyStiletto)

Post #: 37

RE: Email privacy - 10/23/2007 2:21:41 AM

spanklette

Posts: 882
Joined: 2/22/2005
Status: offline

Honestly, if you don't feel comfortable with it...then don't give your passwords out. That being said, Daddy has all of mine...but I have all of His too. It makes paying bills and other things more simple. Honestly, He's never checked my e-mail unless I was still logged in when He brought up the site. And, I've checked His more than once trying to find e-mails that I had sent Him.

Anyway, the point is, it goes both ways. And, it really goes both ways, and was more casual than anything else. He wanted to check something on CM and asked what my password was and He probably doesn't remember it now. But, with the autofill thing, He doesn't have to remember...it's all there if He is so inclined.

Actually, I'll admit that I'm an abuser of His chat account. I'll sit in chat rooms with His Domly name and I don't get trolled. It's almost peaceful.

On a more sober note, He was able to reach my mother when I had to go to the ER because I stuck the number in His phone. And, He always knows what's going on in our checking accounts...I can't tell you how many times He has rolled His eyes at the blank look on my face when He asks how much is in my checking account.

I suppose it's all about trust and being useful. If He wants all of my passwords, He's welcome to them...but unless it's something important, mostly He couldn't care less.

But, there are some things I do hold back, because they aren't mine to share. My mother has shared much of her financial information with me, that will not pass my lips to anyone...even Daddy. I doubt He cares, but there are always personal lines. You just have to decide where yours are and when to push them back should it become necessary.

< Message edited by spanklette -- 10/23/2007 2:22:19 AM >

_____________________________

~spanklette~

"The important thing is this: to be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become. " Charles du Bois

"Please don't shout, can't you see I'm not listening." Billie Myers

(in reply to RubyStiletto)

Post #: 38

RE: Email privacy - 10/23/2007 9:21:00 AM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: gentlestarZR

quote:

That would be easily fixed by adding "My owner reads all my mail" to your profile, and making sure any friends you chat with here understand that as well. While a person may be comfortable telling you something, that does not mean they are comfortable telling him.

i dont agree with that anything i hear form my friends i let my Master know anyways so he knows whats going on in all parts of my life .. my friends tell me things bu i talk to my love about whats going on in thier lives too they are important to me .. so i let him know about all parts of my life down to the lil gossips going around at work :}

forgot to mention Master has access to my accounts and ya know i love him in my email account he orgaizes it and junks the junk mail for me and its always neat and tidy now lol ..

You may not agree with that, but have you asked your friends how they feel?

Valyraen knows just about every damn thing he would ever care to know and probably more than that about whatever conversation I had with my friends but my friends know and trust Valyraen. They also trust me. If they say "I don't want anyone to know this, including Valyraen", no one else is going to know.

I have had friends who, while I loved them, I couldn't stand their SO. If they had told their SO things about me, even if they were ordered to by an owner, I simply wouldn't be able to trust them anymore. In that situation, I would greatly appreciate a "everything I hear Master hears/every e-mail I get Master reads" warning.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to gentlestarZR)

Post #: 39

RE: Email privacy - 10/23/2007 10:14:07 AM

freyjasdottir

Posts: 253
Joined: 8/29/2006
From: PA
Status: offline

I had one person who had the password to here because I asked him to respond to someone for me. I doubt he remembered it after he used it. My old roomate though has all or almost all of them just in case they would ever be needed.

(in reply to AquaticSub)

Post #: 40

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