Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Like to be Punished?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Like to be Punished? Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Like to be Punished? - 10/25/2007 6:45:21 PM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline 		exactly. You are assuming the punishment is corporal play type activity, in your case that sounds like it would not be appropriate.  Everyone has things they don't enjoy, I'm sure a punishment could be found for you.  However, as Rrafe pointed out, the goal of punishment is behavior modification, not play and I believe should be used sparingly.
l 

(in reply to Shawn1066)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Like to be Punished? - 10/25/2007 7:04:12 PM   
RosesHaveThorns


Posts: 312
Joined: 10/14/2007
Status: offline 		I don't like punishment, and since I'm only a sub in the bedroom, this has limited applications in my relationship. Now, punishment play for being naughty? That sounds like fun.

(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Like to be Punished? - 10/25/2007 7:04:59 PM   
RRafe


Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: laurell3

exactly. You are assuming the punishment is corporal play type activity, in your case that sounds like it would not be appropriate.  Everyone has things they don't enjoy, I'm sure a punishment could be found for you.  However, as Rrafe pointed out, the goal of punishment is behavior modification, not play and I believe should be used sparingly.
l 


Used too much-it leads to frustration on the Part of the top-fear and resentment on the part of the bottom. Having played both sides, I know how much this bites rocks.

There are no short cuts in relationships-do the work-or quit.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Like to be Punished? - 10/25/2007 7:55:34 PM   
Willowmoon


Posts: 227
Joined: 9/25/2007
Status: offline 		Sir is trying to teach me that pain can be good and enjoyed so he doesnt tend to use if to punish or discipline me, insteaed he is more likely to make me write as essay, stand/kneel in the corner or sleeep away from him.


(in reply to RRafe)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Like to be Punished? - 10/25/2007 8:17:02 PM   
RRafe


Posts: 2060
Joined: 8/29/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Willowmoon

Sir is trying to teach me that pain can be good and enjoyed so he doesnt tend to use if to punish or discipline me, insteaed he is more likely to make me write as essay, stand/kneel in the corner or sleeep away from him.




The idea is to cause reflection.

Rather than simply dismiss it with some drama and a little sensation play.

_____________________________

I seem to be some wierd combination of Ren and Stimpy

(in reply to Willowmoon)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Like to be Punished? - 10/25/2007 8:37:28 PM   
msindigomontoya


Posts: 28
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline 		For me, the worst punishment of all is "I'm so dissapointed in you". 

(in reply to Shawn1066)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Like to be Punished? - 10/26/2007 10:36:24 AM   
TakenPet


Posts: 147
Joined: 1/12/2007
Status: offline 		For me its not the punishment, any punishment Master gives me is slathered with the trueness that I have disappointed him and pissed him off because now he has to punish me.   
I do enjoy the sadistic part of Master that is willing to play with me, humiliate me and hurt me and treat me like his property because he can.  I guess to each his own.  You should know you are not the only one, just because its something you like and others do not share that view does  not mean it is wrong.  I do enjoy being "beaten" in a form silmilar to what some might call a punishment.
Enjoy it, your Master will have no problems finding a way around it, and finding alternative forms 

(in reply to Shawn1066)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Like to be Punished? - 10/26/2007 10:54:19 AM   
meticulousgirl


Posts: 969
Joined: 2/20/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

quote:

ORIGINAL: stef

If you like it, it's not punishment.  It's play.

~stef



I'm with Stef here.
I cannot imagine gaining any pleasure from a) the act of displeasing Sir so much He punishes me and b) the caning i get as punishment.


Yeah i'm with them only i dont get caned ( i would hate that too) i get flat out denial, my collar taken away etc.etc. etc. until He knows i've learned my lesson.  It's play when you act out just to get punnished and in all honesty that's not a sub or slave that's an attention seeker at that point.

~meticulous~

(in reply to missturbation)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Like to be Punished? - 10/26/2007 1:17:12 PM   
TakenPet


Posts: 147
Joined: 1/12/2007
Status: offline 		Okay the concept of pain for pleasure is different from punishment.  That is simple conditioning, much like pavlov did with his dogs, there is a certain expectation of play when the two(pain and pleasure) are mixed, but the diffrence between play and punishment is very easy to understand even in a conditioning situation.  My worst punishment is being ignored, and I have to say that is not as effective as "I am very disappointed in you" or simply behaving in a way that would make me understand that.  

(in reply to meticulousgirl)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Like to be Punished? - 10/26/2007 4:13:21 PM   
msindigomontoya


Posts: 28
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline 		I got punished the other day by being put in the corner.  It was a double edged sword, cause I was really getting off on the humiliation of being in the corner, yet I was sad over dissapointing my Daddy.  When it was over, he said "You know, I don't enjoy punishing you".  That part was the worst.  So for me, dissapointing Him is the worst punishment.

I might ask for more corner time though... heh heh heh

Indigo

(in reply to Shawn1066)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Like to be Punished? - 10/27/2007 1:26:07 PM   
asiandoll27


Posts: 101
Joined: 2/5/2005
Status: offline 		I am with so many others on this, I do not like to be punished, because it means that I have faild to do what I was suppposed to. If punishment was fun -- probably woudl have different name for it. :)

(in reply to msindigomontoya)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Like to be Punished? - 10/27/2007 4:31:05 PM   
MrSpectacular


Posts: 1153
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline 		To repeat the others if you enjoy it , it is not punishment - now I bet there are some punishments your dom could inflict that you will not enjoy. Broach the subject if you dare!

_____________________________

Yes I am Spectacular and they are real!

(in reply to Shawn1066)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Like to be Punished? - 10/28/2007 12:38:37 AM   
adoracat


Posts: 1779
Joined: 2/16/2007
Status: offline 		Daddy never punishes me physically.  its something he knows puts me in a bad place mentally, i get extremely upset and think that the next step is him rejecting/releasing me.  he says when the time comes if i need correction, he'll think of something else.

now if i *want* to be spanked or flogged?  i ask.  and then he decides if he wants to or not.

kitten, up too late

(in reply to MrSpectacular)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Like to be Punished? - 11/8/2007 10:00:06 AM   
mastertom0071


Posts: 13
Joined: 10/25/2007
Status: offline 		well the type of punishment i like to do is make the slave who has bee n a bad slave  stand in  front of the open window and  let everyone see her naked body all day long  she can sit or do anything at all . no matter who comes to the house she must stand there  and be looked at touched by others  who can do what they want to her and she must thank them for doing it  , will then at the end of the nite have her shave her cunt  and prepare for the sexuall things that she knows i am gonna do  to her  and they can be anything  at all . till i am satisfied with her and that she has satisfied my complete sexuall cravings .

(in reply to Shawn1066)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Like to be Punished? - 11/8/2007 10:07:22 AM   
BBWnNC72


Posts: 1155
Joined: 6/22/2007
From: NC since Jan of 2007, but born and raised in Cali
Status: offline 		i like pain too much so physical punishment of that nature doesnt work for me.  But to hear that i have disappointed Him while He sits there and strokes my hair while craddling my head on His chest, that is the worse thing ever.  Him being so caring, me crying, and hearing in His most gentle voice that i was a disappointment but how He still cares and everything will be ok.  i would rather melt into the floor and become compost then to hear that.


_____________________________

huggs and purrs
Brian's kat
a.k.a. "greedy monkey"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
i am who i am, i am not ashamed. spank me, beat me, bite me, pull my hair, dominate me, control me, but always respect me for who i am.


(in reply to mastertom0071)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Like to be Punished? - 11/8/2007 10:25:42 AM   
mistressadj


Posts: 17
Joined: 11/5/2007
Status: offline 		My submissive is quite masochistic, so I first thought the only way to truly punish him for displeasing me would be to not interact with him at all.  And yes, that would be quite effective.  However, I accidentally discovered that I can deliver the same physical sensations...spanking, paddling, caning...but my attitude made a difference.  When I do those things for play, or just because I want to, he is quite turned on and enjoys it immensely.  But when he believes I am doing those things because I am unhappy with him, it is actually unpleasant for him, and it's difficult for him to accept.  So as long as I make it clear that what is happening is meant as punishment, traditional corporal punishment works. 

If I were actually angry about his behavior, though, I would not touch him.  There isn't really anyway to effectively deliver corporal punishment while angry.  The ultimate punishment for angering me would be no interaction. 

And to resond to someone's question about the difference between discipline and punishment...discipline is just another word for training.  The people who learned from Jesus were called "disciples."  When someone learns an art or craft, s/he studies the "discipline."  Discipline just means teaching or training.  Punishment is a negative consequence to bad behavior, meant to discourage it from happening again.  In my psychology 101 class, we learned that there are basically two ways of shaping someone's behavior...Negative Reinforcement and Positive Reinforcement.  I don't quite remember where corporal punishment would fit...it might not fit into either of those categories, which is why most psychologists would advocate against corporal punishment....LOL.  If someone wants to explain Neg & Pos Reinforcement, I'd love to refresh my memory.  I'm thinking Negative means taking away something desirable, for example....loss of privileges; and positive means adding something desirable, for example, giving praise or monetary rewards.     

(in reply to Shawn1066)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Like to be Punished? - 11/8/2007 10:31:14 AM   
MMMMudd


Posts: 83
Joined: 7/16/2006
Status: offline 		I have to put myself in this catagory, pain is yummy, so it would be a bit counter productive to deter bad behavior with a good time.

  In submitting, I have a deep inherent desire to please, very few things irk me more than being a disappointment. Some kind of penance could never be as cruel as guilt, or regret. In the times we've fought about one thing or another, my baby has given me some task to make it up to him as a sign that we're okay.

Mudd

quote:

i like pain too much so physical punishment of that nature doesnt work for me. But to hear that i have disappointed Him while He sits there and strokes my hair while craddling my head on His chest, that is the worse thing ever.



(in reply to BBWnNC72)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Like to be Punished? - 11/8/2007 10:45:05 AM   
charlotte12


Posts: 471
Joined: 5/9/2006
Status: offline 		I personally hate the idea of dissapointing my Master but the dynamic in which i am not allowed to get away with things and will be corrected when i mess up is very hot for me. When i say i enjoy punishment it's not the act itself (i can ask to be spanked for fun at any time and he will usually be happy to oblige.) I enjoy being made to endure something i don't like because it makes me feel safe in our relationship that he will follow through with the rules he sets. Generally this is not done out of anger or dissapointment but more for training or reminding. If i felt that i had truly dissapointed him that would really hurt.

It sounds like you might enjoy sensation play with lots of different things and perhaps wouldn't need to put it in a punishment context. My relationship to punishment has much more to do with my love of the Master/slave power exchange dynamic than any sort of masochistic side.

_____________________________

Stephan's slaveling

"I'm not superior, I'm just more important." Master (Stephann)

"When you are your freest self, who are you?" Jack Rinella

(in reply to MMMMudd)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Like to be Punished? - 11/8/2007 12:46:54 PM   
KindLadyGrey


Posts: 358
Joined: 11/6/2007
Status: offline 		While I do enjoy punishment and impact play as part of a playful scene, I also really like punishment for real offenses because it cleans the slate. If I have done something truly wrong and my Master/Mistress is actually upset, I feel terrible, and I want to do whatever it takes to make it go away. In vanilla relationships there is often a lingering sense of disappointment even after a prolonged discussion and some good makeup sex. A good punishment allows both the Dom/me and the sub to move on and reconnect after it is over.

On the sub side, I find corporal punishment extremely effective, because it is often my pride that gets in the way of a sincere reconciliation, and a good beating of any sort will break me down and strip that away so I can be honest about how I really feel.

On the Domme side, sometimes a sub hasn't committed a major offense but is just annoying the crap out of you or has done something to make you cranky. In this case, spanking his or her ass until he or she starts begging and apologizing can be a very pleasant way to release that minor frustration whether the sub enjoys it or not. So what if they enjoy it? I also enjoy beating them, so it's a win win. We both get the crankiness out of our systems and can move on with better moods.

That said, I have to agree with the other posters that sometimes the best punishment for real offenses is something really boring and mundane like writing an essay or getting extra chores around the house.

(in reply to charlotte12)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Like to be Punished? - 11/10/2007 12:48:12 AM   
shootingstar67


Posts: 195
Joined: 10/29/2007
Status: offline 		I really wish i knew what kind of submissive i would make. not sure if i would like to be punished. i would like to be corrected for little things that don't make him really  mad but if i am often pissing him off that would really lower my self esteem.

(in reply to KindLadyGrey)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Like to be Punished? Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.078