xaria
Posts: 97
Joined: 1/24/2006
From: USA
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: tootsiepop
I am a submissive that has accepted a LDR with a Dominant with the proviso that W/we suit when W/we meet in the next couple months. My profile clearly stated 24/7 D/s LTR and that I am monogomous.
I am happy with this arrangement except tonight, for the fourth time, I am asked why my owner's name is not mentioned in my profile and why He didn't put His name or nic onto my TSR certificate when He filled it out.
Yes, I've thought of the possible reasons. Good and not so good.
Suddenly I have doubts. The first three questioners were curious subs/slaves so I gave it no regard, but tonight it was a Dominant/Master. What does that mean?
Do I have cause for doubt or am I being overly sensitive? Do I have the right as His owned submissive to ask Him about this? I don't wish to shake this up needlessly. Am I missing something here? Is it common practice to put a Dominant's name into our profiles?
Thanks so much for any insight Y/you can give.
Greetings tootsiepop,
Well, i must say that many things have popped in and out of my mind as i have read through from start to finish. You may notice that most people have the same'ish type advice. i'm going to try to make points instead of suggestions. Try, being the optional word....
Point 1: The relationship is new. There will be questions that appear here and there that will make other questions "pop up", so to say. This is a time when you're establishing if it a relationship that will work once you have met, so make sure you quiry everything.
Point 2: Not all people rush out to place their new-found ownership (both ways of being owned or owning) out there for others to see. This generally has a variety of reasons from things like "why flaunt it, until I know for sure?" to generally not wanting to express their interests for all of collarme.com to browse through.
Point 3: Why let others put worries into your head when most are probably just trying to cause problems? i can't tell you how many times i've had people, Dom's especially, trying to say they would be better for me than my Dom. When they don't get what they want from you they will try belittling you to make themself feel better. It's pointless to put yourself in that position.
Point 4: As a submissive you have the right to question anything. Even as a slave, i am allowed to question Master. It's just in my case, because Master has owned me for so long, i know that His decision is final. i am allowed to ask questions. Most people are, unless their dominant denies such things. One that constantly denies such things should be questioned, (in my opinion obviously) because where is the communication or the ability to build trust.
Ok...i think that's enough points. i hope these help you, even if only in a small way. my personal opinion is that you may or may not have a right to be concerned. The only way to settle your curiousity is by being open and talking to him about your fears, worries, or concerns. Whether they may seem silly or not to others, they probably don't to you. Addressing him openly is truly the only way to clear them up for yourself to have a peace of mind.
One small personal point, i guess everyone calls it something different. Don't let anyone try to tell you that it's "wrong" to say that you're owned, but not collared. Most would consider it more as you're under his training or consideration collar. That doesn't mean you're wrong. It just means you two mutually see it as ownership, without the collar for now. There's nothing wrong with that. There is no one way of doing this lifestyle and the things that make it up to what it is. i hope it all goes well for you.
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xaria - Property of Xavier
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