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RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 11/3/2007 10:34:57 PM   
PleasureMaster0


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not if it done right!

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RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 11/4/2007 10:33:54 AM   
Naturegirl4U


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I wasn't so sure about anal either. I remember wondering how it would feel. Having a finger or two up there was one thing, but a cock was a whole other story. All I could think about was OUCH. And the 1st. few times it really was a pain in the ass Literally. It is hard not to tighten up your butt check muscles. And if you have an imagination like mine it's really hard. He did use lube but, it still hurt. I will say it has been better, Using lube and a vibrator I think helps. Actually, the last time was alot better and I think a little part of me started to like it. So give yourself some time and ask him to please be patient with you.  

(in reply to grlneedstolearn)
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RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 11/24/2007 10:11:48 PM   
OscarHargraves


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May I offer a couple of suggestions please?  As a Dom I happen to LOVE anal sex, but I have learned that this love is not shared by very many women; at least not at first.  When I have been 'breaking in' a new lady on anal, I find that going slow is really important.  First of all it really helps if she is turned on and sexually excited when we start this.  I found that ladies are more willing to try new things and tolerate moderate amounts of pain if they are already sexually aroused.  Secondly I will not try to go all the way in one session.  I go slowly using a finger first, then a small dildo and then maybe a larger one, but ALWAYS with lots of foreplay and lube.  I try to do things that keep her enjoyment level up while I GENTLY work with these toys.  Usually by the time we have done this three, four or five times over a period of several weeks, she is relaxing enough each time to allow me to work a cock size dildo into her and begin to move it in and out.  Be SURE to use lots of lube and go slow.  Push it in part way and wait for her muscles to adjust before going further.  Your efforts will be rewarded when she tells you the first time to please go ahead and try using her that way.

All of that being said, it still requires continuous practice to keep those muscles relaxed and the mind in control.  Good luck and let us know how it all works out.

< Message edited by OscarHargraves -- 11/24/2007 10:14:24 PM >


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RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 11/24/2007 10:29:41 PM   
dawndewdropbaby


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Lube is your friend, use it. I wanted to try it for a while, I needed to settle my curiosity. After convincing myself that I just needed to go through with it instead of being nervous I was in for the surprise it didn't hurt as much as i thought it would. I keep quiet while im on bed but it caused me to make a little noise. My partner wasn't really slow with it but he used large amounts of lube, after the  initial shock of it all I really enjoyed it.

(in reply to grlneedstolearn)
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RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 11/25/2007 5:39:38 AM   
parttimehotty


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Everyone said it so well, but I just have to add my 2 cents :)  I've had anal in my "younger" days, but only on occasion and while it felt ok, it wasn't something I initiated.  Now, w/my Dom, His patience upon entry, even though I know He wanted to just ram it in, He was very gentle and now I'm His complete ass whore.  This is the only time I'm allowed to have complete release, when we have anal sex and I just an't stop. So it will hurt a bit, but if you trust your Dom, this should be a beautiful experience for you.  Next step A2M ;)

< Message edited by parttimehotty -- 11/25/2007 5:40:35 AM >


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RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 11/25/2007 6:01:05 AM   
exquisitefeline1


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For a start fear is not going to help. Period. You need to feel relaxed, highly aroused and fully open, only then can you feel the awesome pleasure that you have passed by. That special spot is filled with exquisite nerve ending that induce the most remarkable pleasure sensations.
I totally understand how you feel but, it was something that i had been petrified of until recently, what helped me is having a partner i completely trust, and have real feeling for. We took it all slowly, another key. Ensuring the right state of being, and gently working with just a finger, after a few plays and you begin to feel safe and enjoy the experience that you have had, can you work up to higher ground.
Make sure you are well lubed, use a manufactured one if needed, i prefer not to but sometimes it helps, and ensure protection, esp if you are switching from anal to vagina, make sure you use a condom for anal, and both shower, to ensure no migrating germs.
And it is true, once gone anal there is no going going back ;) It is not as scary as you think, trust me :)
Goodluck and may the pleasure be yours!

(in reply to biracalsub4wmDom)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 11/25/2007 6:06:28 AM   
exquisitefeline1


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quote:

ORIGINAL: eyesopened

It's a popular misconception that every submissive has to love oral, love anal, be bisexual, be a pain-slut, etc.





Really? Poor kittens...

(in reply to eyesopened)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 11/26/2007 1:46:18 PM   
subboi3382


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practice (with fingers and/or dildoes) and use lots of lube. it shouldnt hurt

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RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 11/26/2007 3:18:35 PM   
Solinear


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The women that I've 'broken in' all ended up saying basically the same thing "Wow, that wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be", then after about a month or two of relatively regular anal sex they find themselves saying the words they never thought they could ever say "Stick it in my ass, please!".

As so many others have stated, it's a two part thing - patience and lubrication.  Any master who is breaking in a new girl and wants it to be anything other than massive psychologically damaging trauma should make sure that they move slow, use lots of lube and don't care if it takes five minutes to get it in all the way, while reminding you frequently "Just relax, it's ok" (or words to that effect).  Once you get the knack of relaxing to make it less painful (there's likely gonna be a little pain in the beginning no matter what you do, unless you start using those scary toys), eventually you'll realize "OMG, that was the hardest orgasm I've ever had, I almost passed out" and you'll want it more and more eventually until you, like all the girls that I've taught about anal, are asking for it.

(in reply to grlneedstolearn)
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RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 11/26/2007 9:40:35 PM   
onlyHisgirl


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KY is Key!  It did hurt at first but as he went...it was lovely and i wow....yeah, it's great!!!!

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RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 11/27/2007 12:33:38 AM   
trusting


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From: Virginia
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your first time should be the most painful! just be gentle and things should work out fine. after the first few times, it will seem natural to you.

it is not as painful as you think it is and you may even find that you enjoy it!


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(in reply to biracalsub4wmDom)
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RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 11/27/2007 12:55:46 AM   
MaamJay


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I have a couple of things to add:

1) Remember to breathe out with long firm exhalations when trying to take in either a toy or a cock ... it really helps to relax your butt cheeks and sphincter. And relaxation and lube are the keys to minimising pain and maximising pleasure.

2) Afterwards, don't be alarmed if you want to pass faeces sooner than later and they are a bit soft ... all that lube softens things more than usual!

No, being a "3-hole girl" isn't essential ... but it's fun!
Maam Jay aka violet[A]

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RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 12/5/2007 8:01:17 AM   
fsub4use


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it is the most sensual experience... all those nerve endings, the submission, the position.... it's all good.  i find that it sometimes helps if the catcher (as opposed to the pitcher) has actually already had one orgasm... all that relaxation makes it easier to open up that muscle. 

i think also that anal virgins think it will hurt when it really doesn't all that much if you are relaxed and there's lots of lube.  i mean, think how big your poo can be ... a man is probalby not gonna put something bigger than that in there... and if he is... well.... relax a little more. 

after awhile it tends to get easier - because our fear has dissipated?  because we have learned to control the muscles better?  because it is partnered with huge pleasure?  who knows?   but i think the fear is bigger than the reality. 

have fun and enjoy!

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RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 12/5/2007 10:55:32 AM   
FRSguy


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I hate to sound incensitive but you'll get use to it.  Get yourself into a good head space and take it like a big girl.
If done corectly in about six to eight months you may find yourself really into it and wanting it at times. I know that
may be hard to believe now but it happens. You will stretch so that taking him will be easier and easier as time goes
by and although there is pain involved most guys care enough to not hurt a girl on purpose. Generaly, the guy want to
make it as nice as possible so he can have it on demand in a year or so. Its a modern world so we do have medical care
in the event any kind of infection occurs. Get with another sub to tell you how to take it easier like with the enemmas so your
clean and pushing slightly against his head when he enters however for the most part lots and lots and lots of woman really
enjoy it and you never know you may as well but the more nervouse you are about it the worse it will be that is why your
head space is so important. You have to accept and not anticipate.
Peace.

(in reply to fsub4use)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 12/5/2007 8:24:56 PM   
Sirsinini


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Joined: 11/13/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: biracalsub4wmDom

Ok, so, the title says it all.  I'M PETRIFIED.
And I know it will happen eventually.
For 33 years, it's been "exit only" back there.  How do I get past the fear that it's going to hurt like hell??  And DOES it hurt like hell??



Oh my !   .....sigh......
It is so friggin amazing !!
Totally an amazingly awesome experience !!
It's as awesome as doing his ass with my tongue 
 
Sir's devoted property

(in reply to biracalsub4wmDom)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 12/5/2007 8:31:22 PM   
goodgirl08


Posts: 145
Joined: 6/11/2007
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Oh my god, it killed. I must have been incredibly tight because the pain didn't stop at all. But god, the feeling of him IN me...incredible, and the fact that he took what he wanted even though it caused me agony I was *psychically* happy that it was all his...

All I can say is, breathe and learn how to take pain.

(in reply to Sirsinini)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 12/5/2007 8:40:55 PM   
Sirsinini


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Joined: 11/13/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: goodgirl08

Oh my god, it killed. I must have been incredibly tight because the pain didn't stop at all. But god, the feeling of him IN me...incredible, and the fact that he took what he wanted even though it caused me agony I was *psychically* happy that it was all his...

All I can say is, breathe and learn how to take pain.


No pain!!
I was dry ass raped by an exbf about 5 yrs ago, so I have something to compare it too.
You are so right goodgirl....  my ass is HIS and no one will ever use it but HIM..... IN me because HE can ....   because He owns me....
 
darn, I'm all fired up for some more !! 
 
Sir's devoted property
 

(in reply to goodgirl08)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 12/7/2007 2:02:57 AM   
phoenixinchains


Posts: 2534
Joined: 4/5/2007
From: i live here
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willpower...
headspace...
cocoa butter lotion...
                    finally was able to just a couple nights ago. after trying for a looooong time. i tried building up with toys but got frustraited because they were never wide enough at the top...  so, i made up my mind that i would accomplish this. i really wanted it, even more than i was afraid, and that was a great measure. so we did. and it hurt, yes. but, in a way that was also desired for. after all was said and done, i was giddy from the mental pleasure of what had happened and wanted to yell out the widow, "i gave Him my ass cherry,"...    yes, it hurt, but i still want to do it again : )          phoenix

what i meant about the toys; they're very narrow at the top to make it easy to enter. a penis is not narrow at the top. i knew this wasn't going to help. and then i reasoned rather than buying a life-like toy, why just have the real thing?

note to self,,, stop posting under influense of imsomnia..

< Message edited by phoenixinchains -- 12/7/2007 2:09:54 AM >

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Profile   Post #: 58
RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 12/7/2007 5:52:52 AM   
arayofsunshine55


Posts: 545
Joined: 8/1/2004
From: San Francisco, CA
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I wrote him a long story about working up to it slowly over time.  On our third date he pulled out of my cunt and plowed into my ass.  without warning.   Got me past it quick.  And the balls it took to just take me, use me as he pleased,  made me cum.  Was it uncomfortable?  Yes.  Did that make me cum more?  Yes.

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Is it not most transformative, most earthshaking, to pierce the veils of self-deception and illusion, and crack the eggshell of ignorance, to most intimately encounter oneself? Lama Surya Das

(in reply to biracalsub4wmDom)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: SCARED to do anal. :( - 12/8/2007 10:04:56 AM   
kaytm


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Joined: 2/6/2004
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I guess my big advice is to breath... Take it slow and breath.  I know it sounds odd to say breath, but the humans reaction to pain is to stop breathing and tense up.  if you can just breath through it you can get through anything.  Oh yeah and lots of lube :)  Good luck!

(in reply to grlneedstolearn)
Profile   Post #: 60
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