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RE: Younger Dom's - 11/4/2007 4:14:45 PM

LadySeraphina

Posts: 931
Joined: 3/28/2006
From: Calgary, Canada
Status: offline

No doubt crowned prince would have had a much more scathing retort for me if he knew I was a pro as well as a lifestyler - after all, doesn't that means I'm 'FAKE' and of course a scam artist? I think I see exactly what his problems are, and as he doesn't actually want assistance (anyone who negates every helpful comment clearly just wants a forum for his gripes) I wish him well, and wash my hands of it.

Oh, regarding young male Doms with excellent profiles, DominionsHand is another who actually popped up on my homescreen on the other side one day, and I simply had to send him a message to tell him what an excellent profile he had. Young Doms like him and MasterShibari make it very clear why not all young males should be written off as immature wankers, which it is often tempting to do.

Again, JMO - don't like it? Tough.

Lady Seraphina

_____________________________

"Men are like wine. They start out as grapes and its up to the woman to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with." -Unknown

www.LadySeraphina.ca

www.SeraphinasToybox.com.

(in reply to LATEXBABY64)

Post #: 41

RE: Younger Dom's - 11/4/2007 4:23:28 PM

sexyred1

Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline

Nothing wrong with younger Doms...I actually prefer them. However, it can only work if the Dom can relate to the submissive on all levels and that takes communication, interest, chemistry, compatibility and sometimes, even when all those are present, the simple fact of generational differences sometimes makes it difficult.

But in terms of D/s or M/s, bring the younger Doms on. As long as they can handle me, I am fine.

(in reply to LadySeraphina)

Post #: 42

RE: Younger Dom's - 11/4/2007 4:26:18 PM

MissMagnolia

Posts: 3636
Status: offline

No one gets respect automaticaly, regardless of their age. They could be the oldest Dom here, but if they don't have anything to respect, they won't be respected.

I generally don't have the same kind of respect for very young Doms or subs, regardless of their experience, as I do for older ones. Perhaps because my son is 22, and his friends are all around the same age, I see them all as kids. Wrong? Maybe, but that's the way it is.

The digs at MS and his profile. Obviously, he is doing better than you, so don't dismiss the suggestions that you make your profile something along those lines. A profile is the first thing people see. If they don't like what they see, it's all over red rover. You must be yourself, but make your profile something interesting and about you as a person.

We all get many, many messages per day. Most of us don't have unlimited hours on the net. Many people don't respond to messages that don't appeal, or to those from a profile that doesn't tickle their pickle. That's life.

The more bitching and moaning you do, the more likely people will see you as a petulant child and not as an experienced Dom.

_____________________________

if at first you dont succeed..then skydiving isnt for you

Resident Whip Cracker AND Resident Orbs Of Joy.

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 43

RE: Younger Dom's - 11/4/2007 4:27:36 PM

LadySeraphina

Posts: 931
Joined: 3/28/2006
From: Calgary, Canada
Status: offline

Well said, Miss Magnolia!

_____________________________

"Men are like wine. They start out as grapes and its up to the woman to stomp the crap out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with." -Unknown

www.LadySeraphina.ca

www.SeraphinasToybox.com.

(in reply to MissMagnolia)

Post #: 44

RE: Younger Dom's - 11/4/2007 4:57:23 PM

Maya2001

Posts: 1656
Joined: 8/22/2007
From: Woodstock ONT,CANADA
Status: offline

quote:

if you message someone with "Hi, my name is... how are you? here's a little about myself? care to share a lil something about you?" should you not receive a similar respectful response? regardless if you're a newbie or an experienced Dom disrespect from such greetings is not warranted...

I have mail filters set inorder to reduce the amount of emails I recieve.which means if you sent me a greeting I would not even see it in my inbox because you are well outside the perameters that my filter is set at.

So am I being desrespectful for not responding to an email that I am not seeing when I check my inbox??? I am sure many others use the email filters to cut down the amount of mail they receive based on things like gender or roles and age

_____________________________

Lead me not into temptation - I can find the way myself

(in reply to thecrownedprince)

Post #: 45

RE: Younger Dom's - 11/4/2007 4:57:52 PM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: thecrownedprince
this has nothing to do with me demanding respect or anything like that, it is more about receiving respect as a person. if you message someone with "Hi, my name is... how are you? here's a little about myself? care to share a lil something about you?" should you not receive a similar respectful response? regardless if you're a newbie or an experienced Dom disrespect from such greetings is not warranted...

Oh your letters aren't being answered. That's all this is about.

No response is a response. Sending a polite "thanks but no thanks" e-mail becomes not worth the time and keystrokes when you get a bunch of "Well, I wasn't interested in you anyway, you fat cow!" responses.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to thecrownedprince)

Post #: 46

RE: Younger Doms - 11/4/2007 5:10:33 PM

MadRabbit

Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: thecrownedprince

why don't younger Doms, like myself, get respect from older subs? They say that age brings experience but there are many older subs that have been in the lifestyle for less years than I. there are also older Doms that have been in the life for less. so my question is, why do subs feel that age has ANYTHING to do with dominance and a Dom's capabilities...

This insecurity isnt a new one or something that is uncommon.

Once you stop whining about it and focus on your own self assurance and not allowing anyone's opinion to influence your self worth, I am sure you will be surprised at how much better things will be.

Edited to Add : Oh yeah...at some point, you will have to accept the fact that time is a factor in knowledge, self improvement, and growth. If you dont get over your own ego, you might end up not knowing anything in 20 years.

< Message edited by MadRabbit -- 11/4/2007 5:12:49 PM >

_____________________________

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(in reply to thecrownedprince)

Post #: 47

RE: Younger Doms - 11/4/2007 5:16:26 PM

MrSpectacular

Posts: 1153
Joined: 8/27/2007
Status: offline

I think Aquaticsub hit the nail - he is peeved because he doesn't get a response - even though he may have crafted a very polite introduction.
He just needs to learn that people have the right to respond or not and not to take it personally.

_____________________________

Yes I am Spectacular and they are real!

(in reply to MadRabbit)

Post #: 48

RE: Younger Doms - 11/4/2007 5:21:00 PM

MistressPurpleFL

Posts: 112
Joined: 10/2/2005
Status: offline

I started at a young age as well but I was always aware that there was also someone out there that could teach me something and my motto in life is if you stop learning you stop living.

My profile states exactly what I want and what I will or will not tolerate. I may interest others and I may scare a few but I always try to be approachable; some say I am too approachable that is why I get a lot of posers.

It is a good thing that not everyone is for you or me where would the challenge be or the fun??

< Message edited by MistressPurpleFL -- 11/4/2007 5:22:16 PM >

_____________________________

"Life is too short to stay in the missionary position" By Mistress PurpleFL

"Nothing caresses like a suede whip in my hand; now let me touch you all over." Be me

"Smile at me with your eyes as you KNEEL to serve me with your HEART!" By me

(in reply to BOUNTYHUNTER)

Post #: 49

RE: Younger Doms - 11/4/2007 6:13:04 PM

Maverick21

Posts: 6
Joined: 9/3/2006
Status: offline

How good the final posts by older Doms are atleast nice too have, and make up for the flames in the begining. I have had previous experiences with this, when I was younger than I am now, but not so much since I have stuck to around my age groups.

I would advise not talking to older submissves, as was brought up the older a person is the more set in their ways they can be. No one likes having a younger person show to them they are just as good if not better. I will also say that with age does come patience.

My advice is that it is a situation that does suck, and laugh in your mind at negative comments because every older person that criticises you hates themself becuase they do not want to admit your better.

(in reply to thecrownedprince)

Post #: 50

RE: Younger Doms - 11/4/2007 7:35:32 PM

SylvereApLeanan

Posts: 8275
Joined: 11/1/2007
From: Hell
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord

quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

Can't say I've ever had that problem. Maybe it's a guy thing?

Don't lump the gender together.

That wasn't my intent. At least not in a derogatory way. What I mean is that, as a Domina, I don't have a problem commanding respect based on my age. My height is another story since I'm short and it's harder to be intimidating when you're looking UP at someone.

Subbie men don't seem to care as much about youth. However, I can see how a sub femme might find it difficult to give control to someone young enough to be her baby brother. Or her son.

(in reply to CuriousLord)

Post #: 51

RE: Younger Doms - 11/4/2007 9:25:42 PM

Koala

Posts: 63
Joined: 5/5/2007
Status: offline

Hahaha... submissive men are often just happy to get the time of day...

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)

Post #: 52

RE: Younger Doms - 11/4/2007 10:53:05 PM

CuriousLord

Posts: 3911
Joined: 4/3/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan
quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord

quote:

ORIGINAL: SylvereApLeanan

Can't say I've ever had that problem. Maybe it's a guy thing?

Don't lump the gender together.

That wasn't my intent. At least not in a derogatory way. What I mean is that, as a Domina, I don't have a problem commanding respect based on my age. My height is another story since I'm short and it's harder to be intimidating when you're looking UP at someone.

Subbie men don't seem to care as much about youth. However, I can see how a sub femme might find it difficult to give control to someone young enough to be her baby brother. Or her son.

It's okay; no offense was taken. (My humor tends to be more dry than most.)

I tend to agree that age isn't a big deal. I haven't had anyone give me trouble for it outside of the boards when someone with an opposing view is out of points and attempts a person insult instead. (But I wouldn't worry about that as relating to D/s so much as someone just taking a debate too personally.)

It's sort of amusing how there have been the "Why are young doms not respected?" posts lately. I mean, a lot of people tend to get insecure and think that their specific demographic is the target of unfair biases, but how often are such a significant portion of such individuals young Dom's?

(in reply to SylvereApLeanan)

Post #: 53

RE: Younger Doms - 11/4/2007 11:05:48 PM

CollegeConundrum

Posts: 322
Joined: 5/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: thecrownedprince

why don't younger Doms, like myself, get respect from older subs? They say that age brings experience but there are many older subs that have been in the lifestyle for less years than I. there are also older Doms that have been in the life for less. so my question is, why do subs feel that age has ANYTHING to do with dominance and a Dom's capabilities...

Old people think they know it all, young people think they know it all.

I think you're the latter.

The people in the middle, like me, get screwed.

(in reply to thecrownedprince)

Post #: 54

RE: Younger Dom's - 11/4/2007 11:08:04 PM

Guilty1974

Posts: 467
Joined: 11/2/2005
From: Den Haag
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: thecrownedprince

i have had profiles like MasterShibari and true it has given me some results however I have had better luck with my profile the way it is

Except that the shouting in yours doesn't seem to get you the respect Shibari's (what's in a name eh?) profile seems to get him. The above also sounds like your adjusting your profile based on the results.

quote:

this is my 3rd time on CM after 1 good sub and one fake.

So each time you find a girls you leave?

quote:

P.S. shibari's profile looks more like a resume than a personal profile. there isn't anything there from what I read that separates him from another Dom, I'm sure his profile works for him but writing a profile like his does not reflect my personality.

Well, then maybe that's the heart of the matter, isn't it? I'm not too fond of people whining about FAKES and stuff like that, and about how they're not respected, no matter whether they're 22 or 52, whereas I do tend to like rope bondage lovers who know some humility, even if they're dominant, and are not afraid to show it.

(in reply to thecrownedprince)

Post #: 55

RE: Younger Doms - 11/4/2007 11:14:10 PM

CuriousLord

Posts: 3911
Joined: 4/3/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CollegeConundrum
quote:

ORIGINAL: thecrownedprince

why don't younger Doms, like myself, get respect from older subs? They say that age brings experience but there are many older subs that have been in the lifestyle for less years than I. there are also older Doms that have been in the life for less. so my question is, why do subs feel that age has ANYTHING to do with dominance and a Dom's capabilities...

Old people think they know it all, young people think they know it all.

I think you're the latter.

The people in the middle, like me, get screwed.

Don't worry, you strike me as knowledgable. I'd say you're probably number two in the know-it-all bit.

Right after MYSELF, of course.

(in reply to CollegeConundrum)

Post #: 56

RE: Younger Doms - 11/4/2007 11:35:35 PM

CollegeConundrum

Posts: 322
Joined: 5/18/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord

quote:

ORIGINAL: CollegeConundrum

Old people think they know it all, young people think they know it all.

I think you're the latter.

The people in the middle, like me, get screwed.

Don't worry, you strike me as knowledgable. I'd say you're probably number two in the know-it-all bit.

Right after MYSELF, of course.

That's really wonderful because your opinion of me means so much.

(in reply to CuriousLord)

Post #: 57

RE: Younger Dom's - 11/5/2007 12:17:34 AM

thecrownedprince

Posts: 4
Joined: 10/8/2007
Status: offline

actually I believe you are quite real, and unfortunately my other comment didn't get posted which would have cleared up all this confusion of why I posted this in the first place.
my problem is not with getting replies from older subs, nor is it in getting replies in general (hence why I said changing my profile means nothing to me). my gripe is in getting the rude responses when you show respect just because of your age. oddly enough I have only experienced this with older subs, ones my age will say " no thank you" or " sorry but I am taken" things of that nature. but the messages I send are not demanding, I speak as if I met them randomly on the street and I'll get the occasional responses like "I don't have time to raise prepubescent children" or "a young thing like you wouldn't know what to do with me" or "don't waste my fucking time"
is anyone else accustomed to getting messages like this from a simple "hi how are you?" can you imagin talkin to someone on the street or in a grocery store and saying "hi" only to receive a "don't waste my time you ugly old hag"? (not that you're ugly, cuz frankly you're not) but do you get what I'm saying?
the point of this is I'm trying to figure out 1... why there is that thought that a Dom is defined by his age and 2... why people automatically turn you away if all they are looking for is happiness... can one night find happiness with a person and not a person of x amount of years in age?

(in reply to LadySeraphina)

Post #: 58

RE: Younger Dom's - 11/5/2007 12:27:03 AM

MissMagnolia

Posts: 3636
Status: offline

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh, that's much clearer OP.

The sad truth is, nasty, rude, bitchy people abound here and everywhere else on the net. I have often had guys pm me in yahoo and say "Hi, do you wanna fuck?" and similar. In fact it got so tiresome I stopped going into chat at all. I also wondered if they would walk up to some random in the street and ask that kind of thing. I guess not, but you're not likely to get a kick in the balls on the net, as you would in real life.

In short sugar, it's not just you. It's Dom/mes, switches, slaves and subs of all ages, races, looks and sizes. We ALL get them. Often unasked for, as we didn't contact the person in the first place. I know it's frustrating, but DO NOT get disheartened, please.

_____________________________

if at first you dont succeed..then skydiving isnt for you

Resident Whip Cracker AND Resident Orbs Of Joy.

(in reply to thecrownedprince)

Post #: 59

RE: Younger Dom's - 11/5/2007 12:32:40 AM

thecrownedprince

Posts: 4
Joined: 10/8/2007
Status: offline

not at all, I don't see no response as disrespect, I understand that there are filters, I also understand that everyone gets bombarded with emails, I myself may or may not be lucky (I only get about 25 a day) but i understand all that and don't see it as disrespect if you don't respond. what I DO see as disrespect (and this is the basis of my who thread and inquiry) is going out of the way to insult and put down someone because of their age or inexperience(or the assumption of inexperience due to age). especially when someone has been nice to you. again... no response.. I don't care, I move on and talk to the next... a polite no thank you or anything along those lines... fine... insults and so on built off assumptions... then yes...
currently I have a pet, I seek another... hence why I usually message those who seek poly relationships...

(in reply to Maya2001)

Post #: 60

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