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RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/14/2007 10:01:31 AM   
MystressDream


Posts: 345
Joined: 7/11/2004
From: Colorado
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: joanus

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kirren

 So, keep your head up kiddo. Dont let em beat you down for saying bone...I happen to like that term.


Thanks for the moral support Kirren, and I like that term to its kinda funny sounding....bone

I don't know what I would have done if I was alone with all these judgemental people...Oh wait yes I do I'd just ignore them like usual......ok screw it, the sarcastic mood isn't with me today.

Anywho Thanks its nice to know that I'm not the only person here who doesn't think Monocromaticly. YAY for Intalectual Prolifuration and Self Actualization. LOL Hows that for young and immature, that will send half of them running to the dictionary.

Also to those of you who didn't get the cute joke*(explained below) there is an old Mexican Proverb: If more than three people say your an ass, then your an ass.
So more than three people say Im cute, guess what that means.

* I act like I have a big ego and say Im cute and all, but I grew up with people calling me ugly, geeky, scranny, etc. So I dont really think Im all that good looking, I simply play the arogant egotistal angle to hide that fact. Great now I'm teaching Psych 101


Just an FYI.... Very few if any will have to run to a dictionary to learn the definitions of the "big impressive words" you have chosen to throw out there to impress us with your "maturity".   However, I advise you to get your own dictionary and at least spell one or two of the words correctly.  It's much more impressive to express your "Intalectual" side if you spell it "Intellectual".  And that's only one of the many words you slaughtered.   So, if you wish to put us all down for being "stoopid", take the time to post it without showing your OWN ignorance.  <smile>
 
Have a nice day.

_____________________________

Knowledge and experience are wonderful things to share. When we stop asking questions, we might as well "hang it up".

check out: www.enclaveproductions.com
www.enclavewest.com

(in reply to joanus)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/14/2007 10:10:38 AM   
Shawn1066


Posts: 987
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MystressDream

quote:

ORIGINAL: joanus

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kirren

 So, keep your head up kiddo. Dont let em beat you down for saying bone...I happen to like that term.


Thanks for the moral support Kirren, and I like that term to its kinda funny sounding....bone

I don't know what I would have done if I was alone with all these judgemental people...Oh wait yes I do I'd just ignore them like usual......ok screw it, the sarcastic mood isn't with me today.

Anywho Thanks its nice to know that I'm not the only person here who doesn't think Monocromaticly. YAY for Intalectual Prolifuration and Self Actualization. LOL Hows that for young and immature, that will send half of them running to the dictionary.

Also to those of you who didn't get the cute joke*(explained below) there is an old Mexican Proverb: If more than three people say your an ass, then your an ass.
So more than three people say Im cute, guess what that means.

* I act like I have a big ego and say Im cute and all, but I grew up with people calling me ugly, geeky, scranny, etc. So I dont really think Im all that good looking, I simply play the arogant egotistal angle to hide that fact. Great now I'm teaching Psych 101


Just an FYI.... Very few if any will have to run to a dictionary to learn the definitions of the "big impressive words" you have chosen to throw out there to impress us with your "maturity".   However, I advise you to get your own dictionary and at least spell one or two of the words correctly.  It's much more impressive to express your "Intalectual" side if you spell it "Intellectual".  And that's only one of the many words you slaughtered.   So, if you wish to put us all down for being "stoopid", take the time to post it without showing your OWN ignorance.  <smile>
 
Have a nice day.


*applauds*

(in reply to MystressDream)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/14/2007 10:27:04 AM   
joanus


Posts: 527
Joined: 2/28/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MystressDream

Just an FYI.... Very few if any will have to run to a dictionary to learn the definitions of the "big impressive words" you have chosen to throw out there to impress us with your "maturity".   However, I advise you to get your own dictionary and at least spell one or two of the words correctly.  It's much more impressive to express your "Intalectual" side if you spell it "Intellectual".  And that's only one of the many words you slaughtered.   So, if you wish to put us all down for being "stoopid", take the time to post it without showing your OWN ignorance.  <smile>
 
Have a nice day.


The great thing about the internet is that no one (or at least I don't) gives a gravy loaded shit if they mispell a word. ( in my defence it was early when I wrote it)
Also Im not ragging on your mediocore grammar, so instead of comenting on the mistakes of others you should be fixing yours.
Anywho the words themselves while large and impressive to you, are quite commen place among most mainstream civilization. Now you see why I used smaller words in my OP so that it could be understood by all not just the upwardly mobile. But I degress from now on I will use smaller words for you ok?

(in reply to MystressDream)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/14/2007 10:28:34 AM   
joanus


Posts: 527
Joined: 2/28/2007
Status: offline 		I apologize I sounded like a total ass in that last post.

(in reply to Shawn1066)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/14/2007 6:02:22 PM   
KaramelGoddess


Posts: 404
Joined: 6/20/2006
Status: offline 		I'm the Domina.  I have needs just like any other Female.  My primary need is to be in control of My boy.
 
I might want to have ice cream hanging upside down from the chandelier while the boy paints My toes... It's his job to see that it happens just the way I want it to.
 
If it's sex with another consenting adult and that adult happens to be My boy, hell yeah I'm going to have it. 
 
~Kara

_____________________________

"Never eat more than you can lift." ~ Miss Piggy

(in reply to joanus)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/14/2007 6:15:16 PM   
PsyVamp


Posts: 1026
Joined: 10/30/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Baroque

This is interesting.
Thank you Tammy Jo.

Your take is another point.
While I may not be as conservative in this area as you, I do not do first meets - no where near.

Oh no. Anyone who I would have sex with has to be known, trusted and wear protection.

( joanus' hopes seem to be getting slimmer)

best -



*nods* 
Ladies....

I do not want a sub or slave to even talk to me about sex... except to find out if it is a hard limit for them.
I want the submission of their mind.. I want their service, what can they do for me?

And if I want to have sex- I'll have sex.  Bearing in mind that I already have someone to serve in that capacity, I'm not out looking for another sexual partner, if I happen to find one, all is fine and "hunkey dorey".

But I don't do sex as a way of introduction.. I don't even do play as a way of introduction.  I once declined to meet a "slave" because he had the gall to think I would meet him at my hotel room for a "first meet"

I also tend to put people in different categories, so there are some that I would never sleep with... even if they looked like adonis.

Lady Jag (Psy)

< Message edited by PsyVamp -- 11/14/2007 6:16:48 PM >

_____________________________

Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive. .
Could a blue screen of death constitute being defenestrated?
~Owner of wolf~ (one of them, anyway)

(in reply to Baroque)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/14/2007 8:46:19 PM   
Solinear


Posts: 283
Joined: 1/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: joanus


The great thing about the internet is that no one (or at least I don't) gives a gravy loaded shit if they mispell a word. ( in my defence it was early when I wrote it)
Also Im not ragging on your mediocore grammar, so instead of comenting on the mistakes of others you should be fixing yours.
Anywho the words themselves while large and impressive to you, are quite commen place among most mainstream civilization. Now you see why I used smaller words in my OP so that it could be understood by all not just the upwardly mobile. But I degress from now on I will use smaller words for you ok?


It's so sad that you have such a poor understanding of the English language that I have to look at your post and say "Does he even know what grammar is?" when you accuse her of having mediocre grammar (false, her grammar is correct) while having poor grammar yourself.

Netiquette from about four years ago was to not criticize others for poor grammar, but that usually goes out the door when spelling and grammar are so poor as to make something difficult to read.

BTW, you made no less than a half dozen grammarical errors and at least as many spelling errors.  This many errors makes it highly likely that you are going to be misunderstood at least a small amount.

PLZ Lern2English

(in reply to joanus)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/14/2007 9:53:19 PM   
aidan


Posts: 904
Joined: 5/28/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

See, I'm actually a very prudish person.

I don't believe in an exchange of body fluids (or the potential of it) unless there is love involved.

Second, I don't believe in playing the odds when it comes to pregnancy so I don't do intercourse at all because we do not want children.

So if sex is only intercourse, then I've only done that consensually with two men in my entire life -- non-consensually would raise that number to 3.

If sex is any activity where you could exchange body fluid even without risk of pregnancy then the numbers are higher but each of those men I loved and I believe loved me.


Yeah, I share a lot of this thinking.

First and foremost, I'm a paranoid person. I just know I'd be the one guy who's condom burst, or who's significant other got a defective pill, or something. The only (near) 100% way for me to be sure that I don't become a father before it's a viable option is to not have intercourse, vaginal intercourse at least.

When I decide I'm ready to have sex, it'll probably be with somebody I'd be ready to take that step in life with. But, who knows, for the right person I might be willing to relax that standing. You can't claim to know for certain how you'll react in a situation until you face it.

That said, I still consider myself a very sexual person, and BDSM is a very sexual thing for me. I consider what I do to be "sex", and it's a part of my romantic relationships. If a Domme makes it clear that she doesn't have sexual contact with her submissive(s), then right away that's a sign that we wouldn't work together. That's putting a distance in the relationship that I wouldn't be comfortable with. I'm not knocking the choice for that distance, just describing why it doesn't work for me.

Aside from vaginal intercourse, I'm willing to do almost anything else with someone provided that we're compatable and have mutual attraction.


_____________________________

Do what now?

"I aim to misbehave."
-Mal Reynolds

(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/15/2007 12:00:42 AM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: joanus

quote:

ORIGINAL: Kirren

 So, keep your head up kiddo. Dont let em beat you down for saying bone...I happen to like that term.


Thanks for the moral support Kirren, and I like that term to its kinda funny sounding....bone

I don't know what I would have done if I was alone with all these judgemental people...Oh wait yes I do I'd just ignore them like usual......ok screw it, the sarcastic mood isn't with me today.

Anywho Thanks its nice to know that I'm not the only person here who doesn't think Monocromaticly. YAY for Intalectual Prolifuration and Self Actualization. LOL Hows that for young and immature, that will send half of them running to the dictionary.

Also to those of you who didn't get the cute joke*(explained below) there is an old Mexican Proverb: If more than three people say your an ass, then your an ass.
So more than three people say Im cute, guess what that means.

* I act like I have a big ego and say Im cute and all, but I grew up with people calling me ugly, geeky, scranny, etc. So I dont really think Im all that good looking, I simply play the arogant egotistal angle to hide that fact. Great now I'm teaching Psych 101


The OP has actually been rather open in the past about some emotional and childhood issues he struggles with.  I don't doubt he's being defensive because of those and it's not necessary for him to explain his every word.  It this the typical post or the way it's presented or the way any of you would have done it?  No, but you're not the OP are you?

Joanus, I'm glad you found someone and this is a great topic which seems to be prompting some good conversation.

Personally, I wouldn't ever want a relationship as either a sub or a Domme without intercourse.  While structure is important to me, having a meaningful close relationship is more important and damn it, I love penetration.

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to joanus)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/15/2007 12:09:48 AM   
SlaafSteven


Posts: 1
Joined: 11/11/2007
Status: offline 		Well, If the Mistress wants to,  there could be sex, maybe if the slave has served her very well.

(in reply to Baroque)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/15/2007 12:34:50 AM   
beeble


Posts: 799
Joined: 5/25/2005
From: UK
Status: offline
quote:

BrainSlugs83 wrote: If a domme wants to fuck her sub, why can't she?

Well, for starters, if the sub doesn't want to be fucked, it's called `rape'.

(in reply to BrainSlugs83)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/15/2007 12:37:48 AM   
laurell3


Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: beeble

quote:

BrainSlugs83 wrote: If a domme wants to fuck her sub, why can't she?

Well, for starters, if the sub doesn't want to be fucked, it's called `rape'.



reread the OP's post and question

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to beeble)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/15/2007 12:55:07 AM   
beeble


Posts: 799
Joined: 5/25/2005
From: UK
Status: offline
quote:

BrainSlugs83 wrote: If a domme wants to fuck her sub, why can't she?
beeble wrote: Well, for starters, if the sub doesn't want to be fucked, it's called `rape'.
laurell3 wrote: reread the OP's post and question

I'm well aware of the context of the OP but the vibe I got from BrainSlugs83's post was that the question was intended literally and outside that context.  Having read BrainSlug83's profile before writing this post, I think I was on the right lines.

In the context of the OP, my answer would be that, if the domme and the sub both want it, there's absolutely no reason not to.  Plenty enough people have already said that.

(in reply to laurell3)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/15/2007 1:20:03 AM   
YourhandMyAss


Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		By the way immature and immaturity usually  has nothing to do with intelligence or knowing big words. It's usualy about the attitude that one presents to the public and or how the person in question acts.

Like are they champion grade spellers but stomp their feet kick and whine when they don't get their way, Are they quite possibly the  oldest person you know but still acts like a spoiled 2 year old.

Do they present themselves with grace and dignity, or like a brawling toddler. If any of those negatives applies constantly, over and over to the person in question then no to me they're not a mature person, and yes they've shown their immaturity.

ect ect ect...


quote:

ORIGINAL: joanus

Anywho Thanks its nice to know that I'm not the only person here who doesn't think Monocromaticly. YAY for Intalectual Prolifuration and Self Actualization. LOL Hows that for young and immature, that will send half of them running to the dictionary.



< Message edited by YourhandMyAss -- 11/15/2007 1:27:49 AM >

(in reply to joanus)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/15/2007 9:10:34 AM   
InnocentYoungSub


Posts: 210
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline 		I assumed sex is usually part of the equation if you're in a live-in situaiton...

Apparently some Dommes think it goes against the dynamic to have sex with a sub. I just thought denying sex was another way to dominate. Didn't realize a lot of Dommes are against it completely.


_____________________________

I live for.. I die for.. I breathe for..

(in reply to Baroque)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/15/2007 9:39:37 AM   
FullfigRIMaam


Posts: 718
Joined: 6/21/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: InnocentYoungSub
I assumed sex is usually part of the equation if you're in a live-in situaiton...

Apparently some Dommes think it goes against the dynamic to have sex with a sub. I just thought denying sex was another way to dominate. Didn't realize a lot of Dommes are against it completely.
Assume nothing, and ask those questions early on, because I've met several submissive men and have chat with a whole lot more who think I'm insane as a dominant (and not very dominant, lol) for saying you will be used as I see fit (including sexually).   
Many so called slave males consider it unnatural, and unacceptable as they try and teach me that is because they are true slaves; in this regard, I'm probably a lot more like the male dominants who require that the slave in my life would put out plenty.  M

_____________________________

"touching was and still is and will always be the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni
"Love is the only sane and satisfactory answer to the problem of human existence." Erich Fromm

(in reply to InnocentYoungSub)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/15/2007 9:55:37 AM   
Baroque


Posts: 38
Status: offline 		Thank you joanus for returning so politely.
We were hard on you.

Remember: if women didn't see such potential in you, no one would bother to correct or assist you.
I do agree you are cute.

(in reply to Kirren)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/15/2007 9:59:52 AM   
BossyShoeBitch


Posts: 3931
Joined: 1/13/2007
From: South Florida
Status: offline 		I agree completely with Baroque..

But maybe we could work on the spelling just a wee bit?

and the sex thing?  If I wanted to fuck him or use him, I would.  If I didn't I wouldn't.. But being that most of this stuff revolves around sex for me, if it was a sub I decided to keep around, he would be a happy boy...

< Message edited by BossyShoeBitch -- 11/15/2007 10:17:46 AM >

_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to Baroque)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/15/2007 10:09:38 AM   
InnocentYoungSub


Posts: 210
Joined: 8/7/2007
Status: offline 		I don't think I could be in a non-sexual relationship. That wouldn't be the right thing for me, personally. 

_____________________________

I live for.. I die for.. I breathe for..

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Sex and the Sub - 11/15/2007 10:31:52 AM   
YourhandMyAss


Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline 		Me either, cause I am a very sexualized person, even though I often get very little to nothing out of the actual act, due to it being a difficult subject, I would never agree to be in a no sex ever relationship unless they were other wise so amazing I'd diew ith out them. 
quote:

ORIGINAL: InnocentYoungSub

I don't think I could be in a non-sexual relationship. That wouldn't be the right thing for me, personally. 

(in reply to InnocentYoungSub)
Profile   Post #: 60
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