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RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/15/2007 6:21:56 PM   
dawntreader


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Since tiny Sage has already hijacked the thread, i wanna say to dark: your pictures are so hot! you guys are awesome!
Now people, back to your discussion

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RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/15/2007 6:38:14 PM   
littlebitxxx


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They are, aren't they, dawn? 
(Sorry, couldn't resist ;) )

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RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/15/2007 7:16:17 PM   
PrincessEllie


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I think calling a whole group of people wanna be's is like standing on a soap box and spouting off "twue" nonsense like an idiot. But I also know someone who would probably fall into the only category I would ever have for people who I could call wanna be's. Honestly, the term wanna be refers to someone who wishes to be something that they are not, but in some way falls short of that goal. In general, we have all been there before in the past.

In refrence to BDSM and the related kinks, I learned early what I was interested in and subsequently had the time to do many years of in-depth research on the matter to make sure I knew all the risks. I learned the names of equipment, I learned safeword policies, I learned the lingo, and I learned that not all Goreans are big scary monsters who steal babies, many of them are pretty cool (even if I don't really agree with their ideals).

I have this friend, and quite honestly she is probably one of the few people I have ever met that I would call a wannabe. Firstly, she is a chronic liar who makes up stories to make herself seem cooler and hipper. She is probably the one person I know who I really want to keep far away from my kink. I'm not being selfish really, over the years she has consistantly tried to copy me in everything I do. I've been friends with her for a long time, and since then she has tried to copy all of my likes and dislikes. I noticed this trend recently and it is really starting to bug me. She is jealous of my looks and my easy way with making friends, because she herself is very immature and has to make up issues so she can feel like the victim while she talks trash about me behind my back (and thusly has lost many friends and is unable to ever get a date.) One day last year, she spontaneously decided that she was a sub and all she wanted in life was to be abused. At first I was excited about having someone on my side, but upon actually discussing things with her, I realized all she wanted was a hobby that would make her appear more mature and edgy. She wants to be a bad little girl for the first time in her life, and somehow has gotten this romanticized notion of BDSM into her head from badly written online stories. She just does not really understand what BDSM is all about. It's the notoriety of it that entertains her, she really has no intention of following the rules or actually learning anything about this before she starts to try and be a sub even though she has a very dominating personality and a bad temper.

She's a wannabe because she tries to copy me and achieve the same success I have. Unfortunatly, she's failed to realize that firstly, I will always be better at being myself than she is, and secondly, she would have to stop being an immature whiny bitch to even come close to my attitude on life. So really, in this scene, I would say a wannabe is anyone who wants the title of Dominant or submissive while actually not being interested in any of the kinky stuff. Essentially, someone who wants the title while still being vanilla to the core because it makes them more "hardcore" or some such nonsense.


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RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/15/2007 7:22:59 PM   
MadRabbit


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quote:

ORIGINAL: PrincessEllie

So really, in this scene, I would say a wannabe is anyone who wants the title of Dominant or submissive while actually not being interested in any of the kinky stuff. Essentially, someone who wants the title while still being vanilla to the core because it makes them more "hardcore" or some such nonsense.



So hypothetically, someone who only wants to give up control to a dominant in a relationship without any inclusion of "kinky sex" such as bondage, spankings or S/M, would be a wannabe?

As for the second sentence....Wow.


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RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/15/2007 7:28:24 PM   
KnightofMists


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             /
          /
        /                                                 Note Picture for Visual Representation
      /-----------------------------        
      \-----------------------------                   WANNA-BE's
        \
          \                                                                they wanna-be fucking
            \

< Message edited by KnightofMists -- 11/15/2007 7:29:13 PM >


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RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/15/2007 7:54:42 PM   
PrincessEllie


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

So hypothetically, someone who only wants to give up control to a dominant in a relationship without any inclusion of "kinky sex" such as bondage, spankings or S/M, would be a wannabe?


I knew I was going to mess up the explanation, sorry about that...

A BDSM wannabe is someone who wants to say "Oh, I'm into BDSM" but actualy does not like D/s, powerplay, or anything kinky at all. Someone who wants to sound cool by using the title, but has no urge to actually take part in any of the things those of us in the scene would term as BDSM.


_____________________________

Sticks and stones
May break my bones
But whips and chains excite me
So tie me up
Or hold me down
And bite me baby, bite me!

http://www.cafepress.com/scenedayware
--Discreet BDSM day clothes--

(in reply to MadRabbit)
Profile   Post #: 46
Wannabeing and nothingness. - 11/15/2007 8:45:05 PM   
ThomasMore


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Does the question also encompass Madonna wannabes?  I always thought they were cute.

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RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/15/2007 8:53:18 PM   
NControlofU


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Alumbrado
Actually, sometimes it is the definition of wannabe, and that's where the perjorative useage comes from.

American Heritage Dictionary:

Wanabe:

One who imitates the behavior, customs, or dress of an admired person or group.


That's it exactly.  You nailed it.  I have met plenty of people in all walks of life but especially in the professional world who are wannabes.  They don't just want to be something.  They wannabe seen as someone they arent.  They arent just aspiring to some higher level or wanting to be more or better at what they are, like a backup singer wanting to be a lead singer. They are trying to deny who they really are and they try to act like someone they arent.  Some of them seem almost delusional in the way they seem to be trying to convince themself that they really are who they are wanting others to believe they are.  They arent being themself.  They just mimic the person or the type of person that they wannabe.  Some are pretty good at it but there is always something phony about them.  They try too hard to convince everyone that they are something they aren't.

(in reply to Alumbrado)
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RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/15/2007 11:07:21 PM   
dyingsexy


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i tend to find people who call others "wanna bes"  or whatnot are simply insecure about their own talents

(in reply to NControlofU)
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RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/16/2007 2:34:18 AM   
stella41b


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Wannabe is a term used by people who seek to define other people but who are unable to define themselves.

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RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/16/2007 5:07:41 AM   
MissBathsheba


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I find the concept of calling people "wanna-bes" with respect to BDSM fascinating.  I don't think everyone knows what they want especially early on and they need to experiment.  It is so unfortunate that so many people are judgemental rather than being encouraging to newcomers.  I get emails on this site saying things like "so are you into D/S?", and I think to myself "of course, otherwise why would I even be on this site to begin with".  I guess since there is such a broad range of interests and activities each person has their own personal perspective on what D/S means to them.  Some people just fantasize about it and I don't see anything wrong with that.  Some people think they do want to meet someone in real life but then they realize when it comes down to it that they are scared or whatever and they change their mind.  Does that make them a bad person just because they changed their mind?  I wouldn't think so. While I do respect all of you who have many many more years of experience and knowledge than I do, I also believe that many things come quite naturally to those who are truly into BDSM in their nature, and experience is just one of many factors that might make someone a good match for you.  I personally see the use of the word wannabe in a profile to be a negative reflection on the individual.  

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RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/16/2007 6:57:00 AM   
Jeffff


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Wannabe, true, fake, poser, real, they are all just more labels. People seems to find it easier to wrap their heads around a concept if they can put it in a neat little box.

Jeff

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RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/16/2007 7:26:52 AM   
LATEXBABY64


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oh this is easy simple someone that does not fallow through with what they say  they can talk the talk and not walk the walk just that easy

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RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/16/2007 12:18:33 PM   
RCdc


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quote:

ORIGINAL: lighthearted

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

Someones wannabe is another persons somebody.
 
the.dark.

 
yes, but no poetry was ever written about wannabees
(at least that I'm aware of)


Oh gosh darnit, and there was I gone dun finking dats what I had jus dun!
 
the.dark.
(.whosthinkingoftakingsomemoreclassesnow.)


< Message edited by Darcyandthedark -- 11/16/2007 12:19:07 PM >


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RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/16/2007 12:24:52 PM   
RCdc


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dawn and tiny sage (yikes littlebitxxx - that's what i want to call you from now on!) -
Thanking ya both kindly and an awww shucks...
Coming from you two beauties, that's a real honour...
I swear, when Darcy and I make it across the pond... photoshoots abound!
 
Peace
the.dark.

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love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

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RE: Wannabeing and nothingness. - 11/16/2007 12:33:11 PM   
Prinsexx


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quote:

ORIGINAL: ThomasMore

Does the question also encompass Madonna wannabes?  I always thought they were cute.

oh dear god.......tears of joy......

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RE: Wannabeing and nothingness. - 11/16/2007 12:35:57 PM   
BruisedTonsils


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quote:

ORIGINAL: ThomasMore

Does the question also encompass Madonna wannabes?  I always thought they were cute.


I was a Madonna wannabe circa 1990.  I'm still a Madonna wannabe.  She always gets what she wants.

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RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/16/2007 12:39:39 PM   
dawntreader


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Joined: 11/23/2006
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 Now that is a definition i can relate to!!

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists







            /
         /
       /                                                 Note Picture for Visual Representation
     /-----------------------------        
     \-----------------------------                   WANNA-BE's
       \
         \                                                                they wanna-be fucking
           \


_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to KnightofMists)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/16/2007 12:41:35 PM   
dawntreader


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That another thing i wannabe....in a photo shoot with Darcy and dark! Sweeeet!

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: How do you define a "Wanna-Be" - 11/16/2007 12:45:19 PM   
lighthearted


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

quote:

ORIGINAL: lighthearted

quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

Someones wannabe is another persons somebody.
 
the.dark.

 
yes, but no poetry was ever written about wannabees
(at least that I'm aware of)


Oh gosh darnit, and there was I gone dun finking dats what I had jus dun!
 
the.dark.
(.whosthinkingoftakingsomemoreclassesnow.)



lol!  no, since you mention it, I don't think you do, maybe just another line or two...

wannabee lived in a wannabee town
with twue doms and subs everywhere around

(and most sincere apologies to ee)

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