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RE: need advice please? - 11/17/2007 6:18:00 PM

SexyBlackMan2

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WARNING! WARNING! WARNING!
you really need to get out soon. you are only going to end up hurt and with nothing. GET OUT and find a master that is more than master in fantasy or name only.

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RE: need advice please? - 11/17/2007 7:17:49 PM

SweetSarijane

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From: KC area Missouri
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My thoughts on it...........

Sit down calmly and talk to him about your concerns and fears. Talk about both of your expectations and desires and needs in this relationship and in general. Where do you match and where don't you? Full, open, honest communication is the key. By doing so, you can make an informed choice on whether or not you can be happy and continue in this relationship. His reactions, actions and words will tell you what you need to know............especially on whether they all match up or not.

It does sound as though you moved a little fast. Maybe didn't take the time to know him well enough first, find out if there were any dealbreakers before making the move and commitment such as poly when you only want monogamy. Take a long, thorough, honest look at all that's transpired in your relationship to date. Did you make a plan for if it didn't work out? Do you have money saved in case you need to get out?

Whatever your choice, I do wish you the best.

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RE: need advice please? - 11/18/2007 3:45:28 AM

laurell3

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quote:

ORIGINAL: wildnbeautiful

ok well i havent said anything to Him and well He hasnt read His messages yet on His profile so...He goes daily as if nothing is wrong calls me His precious wants to marry me and adopt my child ext buys me things... spoiles my kids...true i jumped the gun we met on collerme in january and talked every day for hours on phone he came to fla and got me in april and been here ever since as far as M/s thing goes i could care less really simply because he said i wasnt really a slave type -shrugs- what ever that meant and alot of things he wont talk about because His excuse is He dont wanna make me mad or hurt -shrugs- no He isnt a abuser doesnt make alot of money but i love Him deeply in my heart he is the perfect One for me except i dont know what gives.. but guess all hell will hit the fan when he reads the message i left him wont it..

You live with him and you're sending him an email on collarme instead of sitting down and talking to him? You went to far too fast because you didn't talk, now you're not talking again? Really, if you love him as you say, talk to the man.

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RE: need advice please? - 11/18/2007 6:37:19 AM

wildnbeautiful

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well he came to my work lastnight after he got the message we are gonna work thru this because he and i love eachother and well alot to talk about......thanks for all your opinions -ss- wildnbeautiful

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RE: need advice please? - 11/18/2007 8:10:53 AM

donnaamarie

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Joined: 9/7/2007
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Hi wild,

I'm a little late with this response but felt it needed saying. Now I'm not sure if you are more upset that he isn't what he said he was, or that he is still looking online for something he states he needs. I'll speak more to the first part.

I met my Master in December of 2002 and he moved here to be with me in March of 2003. He came over 2500 miles. The very first week I told him he needed to leave. I actually gave him tickets on Greyhound to go. He said "okay". That was our first test of trust. Had he went all Dom on me and said that he moved all this way and he was damn well staying here I think it would have been shot and I would have wanted him out even faster. That started our journey together and now almost 5 years later we are still together and STILL growing together.

I think that there is an outrageous amount of fantasy perpetuated online and we all get caught up in it. Thankfully I wasn't collared online, Master refused to do it. He also didn't say he loved me until he was here about 3 months. We didn't cyber so there was no preconceived notions about what a stud he would be. But still I had been online for a good long time, collared in chat rooms, blah blah blah, so I already had a bunch of preconceived notions about what it was all going to be about.

It's often NOT like we read about online, but it can be just as appealing and fulfilling in it's own different way. There has to be time invested in the real time world to really learn about one another. Staying honest and keeping the lines of communication open are what is most important.

Good luck and I hope you keep an open mind enough to continue to work on this relationship.

donna

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RE: need advice please? - 11/21/2007 8:28:15 AM

wildnbeautiful

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thankyou for your post and well we have worked out issues and are still together and will see what happens from here thanks everyone and have a great day! wildnbeautiful

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RE: need advice please? - 2/9/2010 8:09:26 AM

wildnbeautiful

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well as i have stated in other thread.. I SHOULD OF RAN AND NEVER LOOKED BACK! just as yall said.. He was no Master .. He was obsessed with my 16 yr old daughter so the police told me..i should of saw the signs...and LISTENED to you guys...He now sits in prison for 10 yrs and life probation for hurting my child badly...physically ..emotionally..and i didnt look for another but found the One who IS a Master and not a wannabe..He is awsome in everyway..and Has stuck by me thru all of what happenedand has happened..oddly enuff i met Him on SL and have ended my search for as long as He will have me...

His nyla aka wildnbeautiful

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RE: need advice please? - 2/9/2010 8:56:35 AM

xxblushesxx

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From: Kentucky
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What did he do that put him in prison?
So you knew him for three months (on the phone) before you moved you and your children in with him?
Did you do a background check before you did this?
When you have children you are held to a higher responsibility. If you want to go off with a stranger, and entrust your life with him, that's your business, but you better REALLY know who you're with before you bring innocent lives into the mix.
It's too late for your daughter, but you said you have children, so you need to be careful. How long have you known the one you're with? What is his background? You should be able to answer these questions...completely.
There also may be other people reading this that NEED to remember this; just because someone operates under the flag of wiitwd, does NOT make him/her a sub/slave, dom/domme or master. It does NOT mean they will be more trust worthy or hold themselves to a higher accountability. Sometimes it's just an easy way to find trusting people willing to put their lives (and the lives of the one's entrusted to them) in their hands. Sometimes they do bad things with those lives. Real bad things.

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RE: need advice please? - 2/9/2010 9:11:22 AM

wildnbeautiful

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-----------------ive known my Master now for 2 yrs before i moved in with him and his family and He is the best that has ever happen to me.. my kids are doing good

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RE: need advice please? - 2/9/2010 9:21:35 AM

xxblushesxx

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Do you know his history? Has he been in prison or in trouble? You can't just take his word for it; look where that got your daughter the last time you did this.

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RE: need advice please? - 2/9/2010 9:25:53 AM

wildnbeautiful

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yes i do He is happily Married to a awsome woman who happens to be my Mistress and he has 3 YOUNG kids and i have been living with him now may be a year so now 3 yrs together and my kids live on there own now they have grown and have kids..so yes to your questions

no He has never been in trouble or prison lol He works for the state helping prisoners start life over lol

< Message edited by wildnbeautiful -- 2/9/2010 9:28:20 AM >

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RE: need advice please? - 2/9/2010 9:34:45 AM

sunshinemiss

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You sure are getting involved in a lot of threads telling a bunch of kind of different stories. Might want to figure your stuff out a bit.

*just saying.

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RE: need advice please? - 2/9/2010 9:40:42 AM

wildnbeautiful

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umm diff stories? whatever.... my story is fact ,,so take it or leave it.. im done thread closed

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RE: need advice please? - 2/9/2010 9:46:22 AM

sunshinemiss

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Well isn't that nice that you are telling us the thread is gonna close...

Let's see, aren't you the gal who is asking the Goreans about honor with a situation in which you imply your fellow there has not acted honorably? Hmmmm? And aren't you the gal who says everything is wonderful with your daughter who was raped by the last fellow you had in your life and now she's all happiness and light? Hmmmm? And aren't you the one who has that silly tag line while telling us that your other master was so bad and now this one is sooooooooo good... oh and now it turns out he's married... and and and.

While things may be fine on the surface, your frenetic posting, the way you speak in your posts, your back and forth, black and white thinking suggests some serious concerns.

Again, therapy. It does a body good.

Good luck,
sunshine

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RE: need advice please? - 2/9/2010 9:50:28 AM

wildnbeautiful

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and your problem is? so what hes married..ever hear of poly??? -rolls eyes- and yes my child is happy WE moved on -duh- so dont comment on stuff you have no clue about ok im done with you

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Post #: 35

RE: need advice please? - 2/9/2010 9:55:52 AM

sunshinemiss

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You know, the thing is I do know a whole lot about this. I know that your daughter is not fine while you think she is. That alone is proof that you are in denial.

Interesting that you ignored all the other points of my post, and you have done nothing but be rude to people who have said harsh but real things to you. You see, missy, a lot of us, the people you are dismissing with your snotty responses, know exactly what you are dealing with. And you COULD get a lot of support and help. Instead you choose to pretend that everything is lovely, you ignore your own shadow self, and you don't take adult responsibility for your actions.

Not everything is an equation. Some things actually need to be revisited, need to be handled. Your rash responses show your true character.

Good luck, and I wish you ... I believe I will borrow from Bull here...

I wish you adulthood,
sunshine

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RE: need advice please? - 2/9/2010 9:58:09 AM

Jeffff

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You simply can't make shit like this up!....

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RE: need advice please? - 2/9/2010 10:09:26 AM

xxblushesxx

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

You simply can't make shit like this up!....

I really wish it were.

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RE: need advice please? - 2/9/2010 11:58:56 AM

AQuietSimpleMan

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You know what is so creepy?

That nothing anyone said to her mattered the first run around and so when she comes back she doesn't listenm to anyone again.

Look, if your daughter was abused by a choice you made, I would think I would be MUCH more humble. Either way I am glad you found a Master that works for you.

But the high horse holyier than thou shit should be rethought.

You came you asked for advice with the exception of one or two people who didn't say run like hell they did say you needed to sit down and talk with your master and get a complete understanding of what was going on which I am going to assume you never did or you would have seen something long before it happened.

In the end, for someone who made all thje mistakes you like to point your fingers are lots of other people.

QSM

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RE: need advice please? - 2/9/2010 1:19:17 PM

HisSub1213

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AQuietSimpleMan

You know what is so creepy?

In the end, for someone who made all thje mistakes you like to point your fingers are lots of other people.

QSM

But in the end, its ALWAYS someone elses fault. I read through this entire thread and the one before and all I can do is shake my head.

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Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped. (Elbert Hubbard)

Fear is the mother of morality. (Friedrich Nietzsche)

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