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Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 2:05:58 AM   
dominic2008


Posts: 3
Joined: 11/19/2007
Status: offline 		Below is a short excerpt from a vanilla site that discusses how men should behave with women
The owner of the site constantly harps on about not being "Too nice" to womenand I would love your opinion on this
So here it is.........................................................


I have a girlfriend who is a perfect 10, but she
has the worst luck with men. Know why? They are
TOO NICE TO HER!!!!!!!! I was sitting out by the
pool with her this past weekend, and listening to
her talk about the latest guy she's dating. He's
cute, attentive, sweet, thoughtful, generous,
funny, and a tiger in bed!! BUT, she told me that
he isn't the "one." I asked her why, and this is
exactly what she said, "He's too agreeable.
Everything I say is OK with him...anything I want
to do, go, or think is OK with him. I'm getting
bored. He doesn't have enough personality for me.
He's always smiling, and my thirteen year old
daughter even says he's a wuss for being so nice
all the time. I want a man who's a challenge."
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 2:54:18 AM   
LadyDove


Posts: 2
Joined: 7/21/2004
Status: offline 		Seems someone has already trained him!!  LOL  Now I would be saying... what a good boy!!

To each their own... now if I can just get rid of the damn vanilla cone over my name Ill be happy.

(in reply to dominic2008)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 4:33:41 AM   
AFlyInYourWeb


Posts: 284
Joined: 8/30/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyDove

Seems someone has already trained him!!  LOL  Now I would be saying... what a good boy!!

To each their own... now if I can just get rid of the damn vanilla cone over my name Ill be happy.



Just keep posting.  I think the changeover is at 25 posts.



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RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 4:54:38 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline 		Actually I can understand what she is saying. While undivided attention is nice on occassion; it does make for a pretty boring relationship after a time.

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RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 4:57:42 AM   
camille65


Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
Status: offline 		I consider 'too nice' in that context to be too passive. Been there & yuck. I didn't like it one bit.It is one thing to be agreeable but quite another to have no opinions or desires of ones own.

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Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 5:11:11 AM   
Mezrem


Posts: 311
Joined: 11/12/2007
Status: offline 		I have heard this often enough in the hum drum of life. Men in general have been taught by our culture in general to be this way.. that it is what is expected if you are not a cave man waiting in the shadows to hit a woman over the head so you can pull her back to your cave.

For my part I agree with Dominic2008 I would pat him on the head, tell him he is a good boy and enjoy.

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Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 5:17:42 AM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		I will not be with someone that is not "nice". What she describes is not about "niceness", it is about feeling as though the person you're with does not have views of their own, anything they are passionate about... in other words, someone who will suck up what they feel to please the person they are with... that to me is not about being "nice"

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Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 5:35:10 AM   
Synocense


Posts: 255
Joined: 8/8/2004
Status: offline 		OOooo yay! Give me the cave man.

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Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 5:40:05 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Synocense

OOooo yay! Give me the cave man.

Ditto LOL

Caveman any day
/nods

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Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 5:48:56 AM   
MasterGremlin


Posts: 230
Joined: 12/30/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dominic2008

Below is a short excerpt from a vanilla site that discusses how men should behave with women
The owner of the site constantly harps on about not being "Too nice" to womenand I would love your opinion on this
So here it is.........................................................


I have a girlfriend who is a perfect 10, but she
has the worst luck with men. Know why? They are
TOO NICE TO HER!!!!!!!! I was sitting out by the
pool with her this past weekend, and listening to
her talk about the latest guy she's dating. He's
cute, attentive, sweet, thoughtful, generous,
funny, and a tiger in bed!! BUT, she told me that
he isn't the "one." I asked her why, and this is
exactly what she said, "He's too agreeable.
Everything I say is OK with him...anything I want
to do, go, or think is OK with him. I'm getting
bored. He doesn't have enough personality for me.
He's always smiling, and my thirteen year old
daughter even says he's a wuss for being so nice
all the time. I want a man who's a challenge."


And when she breaks up with him, he's going to get mad because he "gave her everything she ever wanted" and "nice guys always finish last". 
YUCK!  gives me the heebyjeebies just thinking about it.  There is a big difference between a "nice guy" and a "jellyfish".  But then, I have never liked the kind of guy you could wrap around your little finger.  Give me a man who can lead with confidence and conviction...even if it is in the wrong direction, it's better than a "jellyfish" any day. 

Sincerely,
minxy  

(in reply to dominic2008)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 10:04:31 AM   
MadRabbit


Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline 		Awww....beautiful women....

It's so easy to take something really great for granted because of some small annoyance or defect when you can just scoop up the next guy for a date out of the whole armada of dick-thinking men looking to feel some titties.

It utterly amazes me how I can find very little difference between clothes shopping and dating with some women.



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Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 10:14:45 AM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		There is a difference between kindness and weakness. There is also a difference between rage and agression. it is probably best not too mistake them

Jeff

(in reply to dominic2008)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 10:39:42 AM   
tdslittlehelper


Posts: 79
Joined: 8/30/2007
Status: offline 		no one wants a yes man.. I mean I have a Sir because I like it when I say.. "where are we going, what should I buy, Can I dye my hair..." He has the answer... Can I make all of those choices on my own?  Sure.  Do I like having someone to make them for me?  OMG  yep... 

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Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 10:40:26 AM   
Lkg4MstrSacramen


Posts: 27
Joined: 10/15/2007
Status: offline 		lacking personality or passion is different from being too passive; some men just worship women naturally, and it has nothing to do with whether they are submissive/slaves/or dommes. They just worship women. period.

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Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 10:45:38 AM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tdslittlehelper

no one wants a yes man.. I mean I have a Sir because I like it when I say.. "where are we going, what should I buy, Can I dye my hair..." He has the answer... Can I make all of those choices on my own?  Sure.  Do I like having someone to make them for me?  OMG  yep... 


Many Dominant Women enjoy yes men. 

I have a friend who is like the guy described in the OP.  Nicest guy in the world, and can't understand why women don't stick around.  I won't advise him to change who he is, though, I help by advising him what kind of women to look for.  He needs to be true to himself, and being true to himself is someone who loves doting on a woman and bringing her pleasure and happiness.  I spent far too long trying to be what I'm not, so I won't advise anyone else to do the same.

Instead, I invited him to be my pet. 

(in reply to tdslittlehelper)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 10:50:55 AM   
servilecat


Posts: 126
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline 		i'm sure we hear this quite often but first it is most likely that there is not something lacking in him but in her.....She probably loves chaos and confrontation and a challenge.  That's not a bad thing as long as you can find the right partner.  She most likely wont be happy without a little drama and chaos.  Sometimes even in small increments is enough to add the emotional sting of chaos...some would call it passion, some masochistic  LOL

(in reply to dominic2008)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 10:57:23 AM   
gorgeous1


Posts: 367
Joined: 11/14/2007
Status: offline 		A guy who's too nice in too many ways is a turn off. What I loved about my husband when we first met was that he was Chivalrous, yet a bit chauvanistic, treated me like a princess, yet let me know he was King, NEVER embarrasses me in front of others, yet makes me blush when we're alone...

One time he said to me, "I guess I'm a nice guy. Is it true nice guys always finish last?" I told him it doesn't matter who was first, it's who's last that matters.

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Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 11:00:34 AM   
Tigrita


Posts: 484
Joined: 8/16/2007
From: California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit
Awww....beautiful women....

It's so easy to take something really great for granted because of some small annoyance or defect when you can just scoop up the next guy for a date out of the whole armada of dick-thinking men looking to feel some titties.

It utterly amazes me how I can find very little difference between clothes shopping and dating with some women.


Weren't you one of the ones in a thread a while ago adamantly proclaiming how you refuse to be percieved as 'nice'? 

Ah, right, I suppose if you gave this girl props for sharing your viewpoint it would be too nice of you. 

And as for shopping and dating, absolutely analogous.  I would neeeeeeever settle for an outfit that did less than compliment and enhance and express my personality to a T, and wold search far and wide, and wait many moons for that perfect piece to finish off an outfit, and sometimes stumble uppon it in the most delightful and unexpected places or when I'm not even looking for it. =)  You don't know how picky some women are about their clothes, do you?

All in good fun.  Loosen up a little MR.  When was the last time you smiled?

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~ Tigrita

There is no right path, only the path you take.

Success is making life happen, versus just letting life happen to you.

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Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 11:54:17 AM   
LadyHibiscus


Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline 		I am not one of those dommes just looking for some guy to repeat my orders.  A robot is not an amusing companion.  That said, give me a nice guy!  I hate fighting, I hate drama, I love peace and quiet and compatibility.  I require a tiger in bed, at the very least.  (no cavemen, thanks, they are one-trick ponies)

It is entirely possible to be nice AND boring.  The number of really boring people out there in the world is amazing to me.  May they all go to eharmony and hook up with each other, pronto!  No amount of nice can make up for lack of personality.  No amount of nice can make up for being a jellyfish.  Aaksha mentioned in a thread that the difference between a sub and a chump is one nut sack, and dang if that isn't right!

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Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Being "Too nice" - 11/20/2007 11:58:23 AM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		OP:
To each their own.  I cant deal with someone who has no opinions of their own, and who agrees with everything I say no matter what.  I do have slaves, but they have their own opinions and ideas.
Some women want someone who can be the "man" some dont. 
Sounds like she just needs to stop getting involved with the wrong sort of man.

DV


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VampiresLair

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Profile   Post #: 20
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