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MaamJay -> RE: Getting naked (11/28/2007 12:46:11 AM)
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OK now to the thread ... there are too many variables here for a blanket answer. As many have said, it's different at a play party where naked or semi-naked can be the accepted "dress code" for subbies! I also do the first meeting in public such as a coffee shop or restaurant, and frown on those who dress in too revealing a fashion for such an occasion. So generally, no nakedness on first meeting, and I am not at all interested in watching naked subs on cam! Boring!
However, the first play session is different. As a Domme, I do like My subs to strip ... for the following reasons:
(a) It removes barriers
(b) I get to see how naturally tidy they are and I can issue the first commands directing what they should do with their discarded clothing, this gets the control aspect of the session going
(c) I get to check if they have been obedient to My rule of no boxer shorts (other forms of underwear may be permissible) ... I always keep a large pair of scissors in the Dungeon and I HAVE used them!
(d) For many male subs, it is the first stage of their switch ON to feeling subby (and to getting aroused and hard if they are male)
(e) I do inspect them ... NOT to humiliate them, but to acquaint Myself with them medically and to check out things I should know before I begin to play with them. As I consider (and touch) each part, I ask about its history ... have they ever broken bones, dislocated joints, have heart conditions etc etc ... and I examine the skin closely. I get a feel for how much fat padding there is. I look for existing bruises, swollen veins, broken capillaries, skin lesions and tags, pimples. All this is essential information before I start spanking or flogging them, engaging in hot wax play etc etc. (OK I confess, I also love zapping pimples LOL ... Master and i do bdsm pimples on a daily basis!)
(f) The touches which vary from soft and tingly to raking My nails over them to see how their skin responds, combined with My cool questioning, yet obviously caring questions, My close examination and My remaining fully dressed while they are naked all combines into a delicious mindfuck for them which gets them nicely prepared for what comes next
(g) Gives Me a chance to challenge negative views they may hold about their body image (and modern men are getting right up there with women in having "bits" that they worry about!) and to affirm that they are, as My submissive, beautiful to Me
(h) Reinforces the authority difference between U/us ... much like the boss remaining seated while the employee stands ... it's a body language thing. Naked = vulnerable which is part of the mindset of the submissive rather than the Dominant.
It HAS been My experience that males are generally less reluctant to get their gear off than are females ... I have had several males BEG Me to watch them get naked on cam, whereas a girl has NEVER said that LOL! ... but it is challenging to some males too. I find it to be a very worthwhile approach though. It's certainly not a matter of ogling and staring lewdly as one poster stated ... well, I see so few "classically beautiful" bodies in Dungeons, what is there to ogle at? And I am not about to "lead by example" on this one ... would set up entirely the wrong platform. However, once I am at a point where I want to be more intimate with a sub (not necessarily meaning sex, could be something like wanting to give a golden shower), and on a few rare occasions, this has occurred within the first long play session, I have been willing to remove some/all of My clothing as appropriate. But I do pre-warn subs that they will be required to be naked first off and to not expect to see Me likewise! Some might see that as a positive LOL ... that corset holds a lot in [:D]
Maam Jay aka violet[A]
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