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RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/11/2007 9:09:06 PM   
Aneirin


Posts: 6121
Joined: 3/18/2006
From: Tamaris
Status: offline 		I treat everyone with whom I correspond with as a friend, I seek friends as I know there are possibilities that friends may become something more, I keep an open mind.I understand others maybe like me, a word which may be used is wary, about online dating, I accept this and take what comes.I will always if it comes to meeting, meet as friends as friends are best thing one can have.I hold no intention of angling a meeting into getting another into the sack, this is just not me.Perhaps I am old fashioned, I believe in courtship and I hold ultimate respect for another and their wishes.

I have a lot of friends, 90% of them are female, of a similar age, friends we are and will be, if anything moves beyond that, then that is the way of things and I accept it, I allow nature to take it's course, as we are all creatures of nature.I used to hold ideals of what I wanted in a prospective partner, size, age, appearance, things based on vanity, my own.Now, I recognise the person within the shell, I allow my feelings to rule not my ideals.

I am online for interest, and I will say dating I suppose, else I would not contact those of the fairer sex, but what I do, I do with all honesty each and every time.If I come across a player, I do know, I trust my feelings and my feelings tell me something is wrong, what a website says I ignore.I seek true people not fakes and so far my feelings have shown 'red flags' which I have noticed and acted on, either by cutting contact or being tardy in it.Those who are not players or fakes do get a reply within a day or two.

On here, I always click the button which says' forum posts' as I believe genuine people will probably be there posting, that way one can get a good idea of the person.

(something I do like about another site I am a member of, IC to those that know it, is the network function, those on the network have the option to say whether they know the person offline or on,this way, one can suppose use as a reference system.I know there is a positive experience forum here, but does everyone use it, is it prominent enough)

_____________________________

Everything we are is the result of what we have thought, the mind is everything, what we think, we become - Guatama Buddha

Conservatism is distrust of people tempered by fear - William Gladstone

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/11/2007 9:12:17 PM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		i adore you sexyred, but c'mon do you honestly think that none of this stuff happened before computers? i know that i have lead folks on and been lead on before computers and i know that i have been on both sides of just not that into you before computers (yes i am that old) in fact i would say that the sexual dance is the oldest one there is.

he was on her back burner, he was a back up that she could not let go of for fear of having nothing, and he, bless his sleave wearing heart, bought into the promise of sex, happiness, connection, with out much evidence to go on.

who among us can say that they have not had a 'back burner' on simmer?

but i love the ranty way you say whats on your mind. very sexy.

_____________________________


Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."




(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/11/2007 9:14:04 PM   
Estring


Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		What exactly was so promising about her? I sure don't see it from your post.

_____________________________

Boycott Whales!

(in reply to NightWindWhisper)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/11/2007 9:16:18 PM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress

i adore you sexyred, but c'mon do you honestly think that none of this stuff happened before computers? i know that i have lead folks on and been lead on before computers and i know that i have been on both sides of just not that into you before computers (yes i am that old) in fact i would say that the sexual dance is the oldest one there is.

he was on her back burner, he was a back up that she could not let go of for fear of having nothing, and he, bless his sleave wearing heart, bought into the promise of sex, happiness, connection, with out much evidence to go on.

who among us can say that they have not had a 'back burner' on simmer?

but i love the ranty way you say whats on your mind. very sexy.


LOL, well thanks, that was the first time anyone said they thought my rants were sexy!!

No, seriously, I did say that these things happened, meaning people lied or did not show up, etc. before computers, but I thought I was being clear that it seemed so much more straightforward to me then. You did not have the vastness of the 'net to throw out, so I do believe people made more of an effort to actually meet in person rather than sit around and perv online. It was far better to perv inperson.

Oh, and I totally agree that NWW was deluded about this chick, I was not even addressing all that since everyone else already yelled at the guy.

Maybe it is just me, but I liked the dating/flirting thing so much better when I was giving a guy the double-glance whammy rather than adding a flirty emoticon to an email.



< Message edited by sexyred1 -- 12/11/2007 9:19:16 PM >

(in reply to crouchingtigress)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/11/2007 9:21:11 PM   
Aneirin


Posts: 6121
Joined: 3/18/2006
From: Tamaris
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress
who among us can say that they have not had a 'back burner' on simmer?


I can, whom I take interest in is for real.It is not me to play with another's feelings.I don't like it done to me,and there won't do it to another.

_____________________________

Everything we are is the result of what we have thought, the mind is everything, what we think, we become - Guatama Buddha

Conservatism is distrust of people tempered by fear - William Gladstone

(in reply to crouchingtigress)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/11/2007 9:29:53 PM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin

quote:

ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress
who among us can say that they have not had a 'back burner' on simmer?


I can, whom I take interest in is for real.It is not me to play with another's feelings.I don't like it done to me,and there won't do it to another.


Aneierin, you know i read your post and i can totally feel that level of sincerity from you and hopefully you can feel it from me....but this is where we are at this point in our lives, the dance of unrequited love  i was speaking of, was back in my teens and early 20s...i would be very surprised if you scanned all the chicks that dug you back then and could not come up with a single one you kept on a back burner...

sexyred:
quote:

Maybe it is just me, but I liked the dating/flirting thing so much better when I was giving a guy the double-glance whammy rather than adding a flirty emoticon to an email.


god i laughed out loud...yep...so true so true.

_____________________________


Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."




(in reply to Aneirin)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/11/2007 10:09:51 PM   
KindLadyGrey


Posts: 358
Joined: 11/6/2007
Status: offline 		I tend to like to meet as soon as possible too. If a person does not indicate an interest to meet in real life and start talking pragmatics (when? where?), I tend to lose interest and fade away.

(in reply to batshalom)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/11/2007 11:01:34 PM   
surelyujest71


Posts: 48
Joined: 4/28/2007
Status: offline 		My grandfather went to WWII, and my grandmother stayed home.  While in Europe, a friend of my grandfather took a picture of him.  Meanwhile, back in the US of A, a friend of my grandmother's "borrowed" a picture of my grandmother.  These 2 people wrote letters back and forth, my grandfather and grandmother never realizing their own photo was part of the catalyst of this budding long-distance relationship.  When they all made it back, it was eventually time for them all to get together.  The most amazing thing is... ok, these were NOT attractive people, but they had each lied to each other with someone else's pictures... they didn't get upset with each other, not at all.  They got married.  They lived long and happy lives together "till death did them part."

Of course, this is not something I recommend to anyone.  Tell me lies about who and what you are, and either everything falls apart before we meet, or I leave you naked, in the middle of a national forest, in the winter.  Perhaps with just a small cut, so the blood smell might attract predators. 

No, I wouldn't be that bad!  But I've been lied to online, before, and I do not take it well.

Tell the truth, everone.  It may not always have the same short-term benefits, but the long-term will really turn out incredible.

-Mathew

(in reply to KindLadyGrey)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/11/2007 11:12:16 PM   
surelyujest71


Posts: 48
Joined: 4/28/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: crouchingtigress
who among us can say that they have not had a 'back burner' on simmer?


Honestly?  I haven't kept any girls on the back burner.  Ever.  I can look back, and wish I had been able to, at least once, but given the choice again, I still would have made a choice, not kept anyone on the side.  And in my youth, I never really had the chance to hold someone on a back burner - a date here, a date there, never was much going on.

(in reply to crouchingtigress)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/11/2007 11:44:37 PM   
MsPleasure


Posts: 215
Joined: 1/1/2007
Status: offline 		   The deception I run into usually has to do with a person being married or attached.  Also the sub that says they are willing to submit but are trying to run things when you get into a conversation.  Then the sub that seems to be a good prospect drop out of site.

I send a few questions important to me by email if the response is what I'm looking for, I always request a picture and phone number.   Sometimes viewing a picture I will stop the process.  Next, I will call on the phone.  If they find excuses about leaving a number I stop the process.  If the conversation flows and we seem compatible on what our expectations are, I decide if I want to meet.  The subs I've met did represent themselves accurately.  It does'nt always lead to anything, but at least my experiences have been positive.  

It's unfortunate, but there are no guarantees.  People can say anything but a lot of times can't or are afraid to back it up. 

(in reply to NightWindWhisper)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/12/2007 5:18:36 AM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

quote:


It's also worth mentioning that the Collarme milesometer is more than a bit wonky.


How does it even work if you don't supply a zipcode?  Does it go by IP server location?  Because I don't have a zip, yet if figures mileage.



If it knows that there are over 28+ million girls in your area wanting to fuck your brains out and you live in a town of 165 and there is no californiasuckangel in Richville cause you went door to door.........go to Ebay and check a distance to a town, then go to mapquest and check a distance to a town....they could vary 100 miles easy, but yah!!! it goes by ip collocation.

Ron

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/12/2007 6:45:28 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline
quote:

collocation.


That should be a collarme word.  Like collarcation.


_____________________________

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/12/2007 9:21:33 AM   
Jeffff


Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline 		I am tired of all you online hussy's NOT leading me on!!.What about my fragile ego? I swear, not enough people wake up in the morning and think to themselves "what would be good for Jeff today"


Jeff

(in reply to KatyLied)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/12/2007 9:59:39 AM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline 		Nine out of ten dermatoligists agree that most subs don't dig farmer tans.

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(in reply to Jeffff)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/12/2007 10:10:08 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		Hey red look into my eyes. Tell me it isnt so coruchingtigress is older than the computer age. Big deal in grade school we had ink wells and feather quills to write with. As for online deception learn to deal with it.

(in reply to Jeffff)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/26/2007 8:37:29 PM   
vegeta


Posts: 93
Joined: 8/14/2004
Status: offline 		You will find more honest people in the forums than the Nigerian scammers you will find in the personals here.

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/26/2007 8:59:04 PM   
faerytattoodgirl


Posts: 5824
Status: offline 		Ive been active online bdsm since 2000.  it took 2 years before my first meeting with someone.   but in that year i met several and even long distance to california. I at that time was to new to know what i wanted.  So the way i tried to figure out what i wanted was going with the extreme 24-7/TPE.  Which had taught me so much about myself and what i want now.

Since then i have always been true to what i seek and what i dont seek.  I have blogs on my life and experiences.  I am serious but when someone talks to me and finds out my physical issues then the game is over, no interest.  Mainly because anyone who has had interest in me only wants sex.  Im not here for that.  I cant even offer it due to current physical issues.

This makes things near impossible for me to find someone.  A high % of people here are only here for fantasy fun or sexual contacts.  Yes of course there are real ones here as well.  Just what i have to offer doesnt seem to appeal to them because my situation is very very unique.  But i wont quit my search. 

(in reply to vegeta)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/26/2007 10:00:00 PM   
Missokyst


Posts: 6041
Joined: 9/9/2006
Status: offline 		I agree.  I would never have someone on the back burner.  I deliberately stay away from getting involved with anyone until I have stepped away from someone for a long time.
I never understood why people choose to move from one to the next as if they could not stand that moment of "alone"
Kyst

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aneirin
I can, whom I take interest in is for real.It is not me to play with another's feelings.I don't like it done to me,and there won't do it to another.


_____________________________

pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding ~Gibran, Kahlil

“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”
― Bob Marley


(in reply to Aneirin)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/26/2007 10:02:41 PM   
PanthersMom


Posts: 2215
Joined: 11/26/2007
From: Cleveland Ohio
Status: offline 		not everyone is here to find a mate, some are here to amuse themselves with fantasies and games, other people's feelings be damned.  grow a thicker skin and move along, nothing to see here.

PM

_____________________________

That which does not kill me, better run pretty damn fast

I miss my ex, but my aim is improving!




(in reply to batshalom)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Sick and tired of online deception... - 12/27/2007 1:24:43 AM   
CuriousLord


Posts: 3911
Joined: 4/3/2007
Status: offline 		I'm with LA on this one; it sounds like you really thought too much about it. It sounds like this girl had a casual chat interest, but you thought it was something much more serious..

To be honest, you may want to take a deep breath and a moment to back up and let go of some of that emotional investment.

(in reply to NightWindWhisper)
Profile   Post #: 60
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