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RE: Till when are you a submissive, and when do you turn into a doormat ?


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RE: Till when are you a submissive, and when do you tur... - 12/14/2007 11:49:26 AM   
Shawn1066


Posts: 987
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessTeaze

To Me this is a grey zone.
I treat My subs always with respect,
and wouldn't want a doormat in the first place.
I don't like to see them, and will tell them too!

But how far will you go for your Dominant?
And when are you turning into a doormat?

There is a huge grey area, in which use and abuse lay close by.
In the name of Bdsm there is allot done, which in My eyes, isn't correct.
So how do Yyou see this?

Thanx already for Yyour opinion.

Warm Greetingz

GoddezzT`



You're a doormat the moment submission becomes something you feel you -have- to do rather than something you -want- to do.  In my opinion, anywhoo.

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Till when are you a submissive, and when do you tur... - 12/14/2007 11:53:59 AM   
kyraofMists


Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessTeaze

sounds that you've a healthy relationship goin on
kyraofMists !!
good on you hon.

B safe

GoddezzT`



Thank you, T.  I think our relationship is very healthy.  I also know that there are people who think our relationship is unhealthy and possibly that I am being abused.

Knight's Kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Till when are you a submissive, and when do you tur... - 12/14/2007 12:33:15 PM   
Peridot


Posts: 78
Status: offline 		When you bottom for a heel 

(in reply to kyraofMists)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Till when are you a submissive, and when do you tur... - 12/14/2007 1:26:02 PM   
adoracat


Posts: 1779
Joined: 2/16/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessTeaze

I really admire you
for being so honest adoracat.
And the fact you so well know how it is in your relationships,
and you're able to handle that.
I truly have respect for that.

It's a choise, after all.

I wish you enough!

GoddezzT`




thank you.  *smiles*  i could make other choices but for the most part i'm content.

and i do have the satisfaction of the occasional "you know, NO one else would put up with my shit!"  i just smile and say "i know, honey.  i know."

happiness is what you make of things.

kitten

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Till when are you a submissive, and when do you tur... - 12/14/2007 2:02:07 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Doormat status arrives when you do things that makes you lose respect for yourself, when you break your moral boundaries knowing that you'll hate yourself for doing so.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Till when are you a submissive, and when do you tur... - 12/14/2007 4:10:44 PM   
littlebitxxx


Posts: 732
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kyraofMists          snipped

Webster defines doormat as "one that submits without protest to abuse or indignities". Knight's Kyra


I was a Webster's doormat for 21 vanilla married years.  Now I am a submissive.  HUGE difference. 

_____________________________

There is no such thing as can't unless it is followed by yet

It is the meaningless little acts that become meaningful in the doing.

The people that mind don't matter and the people that matter don't mind.

(in reply to kyraofMists)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Till when are you a submissive, and when do you tur... - 12/14/2007 7:57:49 PM   
salilus


Posts: 201
Joined: 5/18/2007
Status: offline 		I don't think I'm ever a door mat. I'm 110% his possession, all the time, but he doesn't own a door mat.

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Till when are you a submissive, and when do you tur... - 12/14/2007 9:15:20 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sambamanslilgirl
doormats are only good for wiping the snow, grime and salt off my Nikes


I love it when he uses me for that. 

I think doormat is the derogatory term some submissives give other submissives...similar to the derogatory label of "micromanager" given to dominants. 

I am whatever he says I am - happily so.  Although he did say I am more useful as a foot rest than a doormat.  No abuse here.  I left that relationship a long time ago.

< Message edited by ownedgirlie -- 12/14/2007 9:16:55 PM >

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Till when are you a submissive, and when do you tur... - 12/14/2007 10:43:17 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		The doormat syndrome really has nothing to do with submissiveness. Being a doormat is being in an incredibly co-dependent relationship. Here, you are not enforcing your boundaries or striving to have your needs met as you work to make your partner happy. A doormat has not self esteme of there own and thus relies on their partner to give it to them. When the partner is unhappy with them, which eventually happens, their world crumbles. At this point, they will do anything to gain the other person's approval again, thus leading to the co-dependent relationship. You can have this kind of relationship anywhere. It's not soley our problem.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Till when are you a submissive, and when do you tur... - 12/15/2007 9:01:10 AM   
GoddessTeaze


Posts: 1125
Joined: 10/14/2006
From: The Netherlands
Status: offline
I'm happy to hear that littlebitxxx,
I wish you enough.

GoddezzT`



_____________________________

~* The only disability in life is a bad attitude. ~Scott Hamilton*~

~*Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart. ~Kahlil Gibran*~

(in reply to littlebitxxx)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Till when are you a submissive, and when do you tur... - 12/15/2007 9:04:21 AM   
GoddessTeaze


Posts: 1125
Joined: 10/14/2006
From: The Netherlands
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sambamanslilgirl
doormats are only good for wiping the snow, grime and salt off my Nikes


quote:

I love it when he uses me for that. 
ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

As long as you're happy
and fine with all that happends,
then it's no problem!

Goodluck hon.

GoddezzT`



_____________________________

~* The only disability in life is a bad attitude. ~Scott Hamilton*~

~*Beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart. ~Kahlil Gibran*~

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 31
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