quote:

ORIGINAL: Subboy06

I've started finding myself at a cross roads my mom who unfortunately found out about me being in the lifestyle when she stumbled accross my toy bag (had more books than toys). She is very christian and keeps asking me if I fall in love with someone who doesn't support bdsm will I leave it for love? (my father was a submissive and gave up the lifestyle for my mother I found out when he hid my toy bag so she couldn't torch it), I recently received a training collar and part of my contract I have to be honest with my mom at all times if she asks I'm not allowed to lie which makes things extremely uncomfortable in my house and I find myself almost feeling like I'm being torn apart alot of the time and honestly am not completely sure what to do about it. I think alot about trying to go back into vanillaism but honestly never seemed to really fit in in it. I was at one time in line to become a youth leader for a church so that seems to tear me apart even further. I think I'm starting to ramble so I'm just going to shut up and curl up in a corner now.
Submissively yours,
subboy

I think it is unfortunate that your Mistress has taken this approach with you.  I don't think it's her right to force you to out yourself to your family.  There are other ways to be honest with your mother without sharing hurtful information or having frequent "in your face" confrontations with your mother over your activities.  Simply saying "you probably don't want to know" or "I think it's best we don't discuss it further" would not be lying to her and would clearly convey the message to her that you're likely going to be engaging in activities she wouldn't approve of.  Now that she knows about the path you've chosen to follow, she really doesn't need to know the details until she's ready at which time she'll ask. 

As to church, I know a sub in the lifestyle who until recently taught Sunday School at the church where my children attend with their mother.  I see no conflict in this.  The church accepts people of all lifestyles and at least half of the congregation (probably more like 2/3rds) are lesbian and gay couples who are living as couples who out of the closet, including one of the assistant ministers.

I wish you well and hope you will discuss this issue further with your Mistress; with her hopefully agreeing to modify your contract to allow for a less stressful living situation at home.  IMO, neither you nor your mother and father need this kind of constant tension and conflict in your home over the lifestyle choices you are making.  Clearly, it's not working to your benefit, nor to the benefit of your relationship with your Mistress if it's causing you such stress. 

quote:

ORIGINAL: Subboy06

This is because my Mistress felt that by hiding and by coming up with excuses for where I was going and what I was doing was dishonoring my mothers love for me and that by doing so my mom would start to trust me more and allow me to make my own decisions more (shes very overprotective and sheltering and at first thought I was trying to do things to rebel against her which I'm not). Not to mention that to an agreement with my parents while I attend college I get free room and board at home so I can have money saved up for when I graduate and move out.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Subboy06

This is because my Mistress felt that by hiding and by coming up with excuses for where I was going and what I was doing was dishonoring my mothers love for me and that by doing so my mom would start to trust me more and allow me to make my own decisions more (shes very overprotective and sheltering and at first thought I was trying to do things to rebel against her which I'm not). Not to mention that to an agreement with my parents while I attend college I get free room and board at home so I can have money saved up for when I graduate and move out.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MsCfromMelbourne

...It wasn't BDSM that was my problem, it was my need to "save" every cute stray dog that landed on my door step.