ownedgirlie
Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006 Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: juliaoceania It seems almost ludicrous to me that 3 points would make the difference between a happy life and being a worthless failure. I am sorry, but after losing a parent at 14, being a single mom most of my adult life, over coming many challenges, being a scholar, having the opportunity to apply to one of the top 10 schools nationwide this year...it is hard for me to feel pity. We all have different thressholds, different boundaries, different "last straws." Many of us have gone through challenges and traumas in life, which have brought us to where we are today. I could list mine here, but I will choose not to, and just say I was pretty fucked up for the majority of my life, due to a lot of emotional and physical abuse. One time I was complaining to one sister about the other. My grandmother had had a heart attack, and my sister & I were taking care of her. Now, I was married and working full time, and my sister was married and at home, doing god knows what (no children or pets). She was really stressed about having to help my grandmother - it was too much for her. This pissed me off, because the burden fell on me, so I griped about it to my other sister who was across the country. She told me great advice which I have carried with me to this day: "Rather than getting angry at her for being weak, why don't you be grateful for your own strength?" To this day, that one sister of mine crashes when faced with what I view as "nothing." She has her reasons. I choose to support her and help her rather than chastize her and tell her to grow up and shut up. As a result, we have a loving relationship in which she gives what she can, and in which she has become more open to hearing gently offered advice. We wouldn't have that if I expected her to meet the bar I have for myself.
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