RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry.

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RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/23/2007 6:35:00 PM

charmdpetKeira

Posts: 916
Joined: 6/2/2007
Status: offline

Another approach to getting over depression; don’t. Depression is the effect of some type of cause; trying to cure depression is like healing a sore caused by a virus, without getting rid of the virus. It will just keep coming back.

To the OP, I started reading your posts in this thread, but had to stop. From my prospective, you are sitting in one of the biggest pits of despair I have ever encountered; low test scores are the least of your problems.

You seem to be basing everything you believe to know of yourself on the opinions of others. While I am doubtful that anyone can ever completely know their selves, no one is more capable of knowing you, than you are.

I would suggest working on raising your self-esteem, but first you would need to get some.

Side note: underachievement is sign of lack of desire, find that which drives you and achievement should follow.

Sincerely,

k

_____________________________

Life is tough, that does not mean it isn't fair.

There is no wrong choice, only consequence.

(in reply to kitttty)

Post #: 121

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/23/2007 6:55:34 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

I'm glad Kitty posted that exerpt from her dom because honestly, that's what a LOT of subs/slaves I know would THRIVE under. They need that hard line, they need that up front harshness.

Heck, even I need it occasionally.

As I said back on page 5, the issue here isn't really the dom setting a standard (which is not only reasonable, but completely acheivable and agreed upon by the sub in this case), or the sub failing the standard (which she most definitely did), or even the dom enforcing consequences for the pre agreed upon reasonable acheiveable standard which was not met.

It's someone freaking out, taking things out of perspective and posting when they aren't in a rational frame of mind with a relationship that obviously has some security issues involved.

Frankly I applaud what I've heard and seen of the dom IN THIS INSTANCE so far. Consistency, high standards, communication- all the good things for a solid authority dynamic.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to charmdpetKeira)

Post #: 122

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 11:15:23 AM

kitttty

Posts: 494
Joined: 10/10/2007
Status: offline

Keira,

I have tended to agree with you and have stopped trying to medicate my depression even though it is often severe. My psychiatrist actually agrees with you too and says it is unikely that i am depressed for purely neurochemical reasons. i am a very depressed person for a number of reasons but I have not always been depressed.

LA, thank you for the compliments for Master. it makes me happy when people express praise of him. I do not try to paint him in a negative light. I do tend to post when I am upset over something, but in those cases I do not try to express what is bad about him- rather I want to express how I perceive the situation.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 123

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 12:49:30 PM

kitttty

Posts: 494
Joined: 10/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

My entire life revolves around not allowing myself to ever get to the place where I do not want to crawl out of bed. That means a commitment to eating, sleeping, exercising, meditation...

It is a disease that the majority of people will suffer from at one point or another...

K. Thanks.

I'm neither helped or hurt by any comments you are making. But really? Put your big girl panties on? Are you sure you've been depressed?

There is such a strange variation in reactions in this thread. Some say I am arrogant and bragging. Some say I come off as having no self esteem. The whole thing reads like a jumble. I am not always a polarizing person, but it seems I am on collarme.

(in reply to popeye1250)

Post #: 124

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 1:31:48 PM

Peridot

Posts: 78
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: kitttty

Some say I am arrogant and bragging. Some say I come off as having no self esteem.

Makes sense. If you are not feeling confident you may come across as arrogant in defense.

quote:

The whole thing reads like a jumble. I am not always a polarizing person, but it seems I am on collarme.

Some people express themselves in writing better than others. Some who write well may think too fast and could be self concious or have an unusual style?

Besides - readers can't see your face. Likely words on a screen may not represent you as really you are.

Tomorrow is another day...
(beware of ellipsis)

Merry Christmas to All.

< Message edited by Peridot -- 12/24/2007 1:33:53 PM >

(in reply to kitttty)

Post #: 125

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 6:37:08 PM

kitttty

Posts: 494
Joined: 10/10/2007
Status: offline

Told my dad (biological father). I also mentioned that I would have been a lot less stressed taking it if he hadn't yelled at me so much the days before. I took off work for a few days to study and went home (bad bad idea). So, my dad is giving me a six month disowning and he says that if I do better without him ever speaking to me, then it proves that Im better off without him 'trying to get me to do well'. Strange because he is against me going to law school anyways.

I bet he means it to. The last disowning I got was for four months (although it wasn't a deliberately specified time period)- did not hear one word from him. It was because he saw my birth control shot perscription and he was fucking livid to guess that I was engaging in 'activity'. Good lord would he proud of me now- me belonging to a Master as a sexual pet and all.

Because I took a few days off of work then, I worked today and now I'm all alone for X-mas and looks like I am mainly getting the threat of punishment and a temporary disowning. No, its not true. My aunt sent me a gift certificate. My mom sent me some make up. And my friend mailed me a card.

I any case, this isn't the type of thing that makes me depressed. I think that because Master says he will see me as soon as he gets back and because he is being communicative with me, I feel almost content.

My goal is to finish a draft of my diversity statement today. If I do that, I will feel okey dokey, I think.

God, I really really hate my score. It makes me want to hit something really hard.

Any male subs out there that need a sadist?

(in reply to Peridot)

Post #: 126

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 6:41:35 PM

BlackKnight

Posts: 767
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

You should be thoroughly flogged.

_____________________________

'Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.'
Life of Reason, Reason in Common Sense, Scribner's, 1905, page 284"
George Santayana

Just because I'm paranoid, doesn't mean they're not out to get me!

(in reply to kitttty)

Post #: 127

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 6:53:14 PM

charmdpetKeira

Posts: 916
Joined: 6/2/2007
Status: offline

<<< wishes she was being thoroughly flogged. :(

_____________________________

Life is tough, that does not mean it isn't fair.

There is no wrong choice, only consequence.

(in reply to BlackKnight)

Post #: 128

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 6:55:41 PM

laurell3

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: kitttty

Told my dad (biological father). I also mentioned that I would have been a lot less stressed taking it if he hadn't yelled at me so much the days before. I took off work for a few days to study and went home (bad bad idea). So, my dad is giving me a six month disowning and he says that if I do better without him ever speaking to me, then it proves that Im better off without him 'trying to get me to do well'. Strange because he is against me going to law school anyways.

I bet he means it to. The last disowning I got was for four months (although it wasn't a deliberately specified time period)- did not hear one word from him. It was because he saw my birth control shot perscription and he was fucking livid to guess that I was engaging in 'activity'. Good lord would he proud of me now- me belonging to a Master as a sexual pet and all.

Because I took a few days off of work then, I worked today and now I'm all alone for X-mas and looks like I am mainly getting the threat of punishment and a temporary disowning. No, its not true. My aunt sent me a gift certificate. My mom sent me some make up. And my friend mailed me a card.

I any case, this isn't the type of thing that makes me depressed. I think that because Master says he will see me as soon as he gets back and because he is being communicative with me, I feel almost content.

My goal is to finish a draft of my diversity statement today. If I do that, I will feel okey dokey, I think.

God, I really really hate my score. It makes me want to hit something really hard.

Any male subs out there that need a sadist?

Well this explains alot about your view of yourself. Success, accomplishment, esteem, self-worth come from within. I don't know your family, but I can tell you it took me three years of therapy to learn that my family has some serious limitations that have nothing to do with me or my value and should not be any type of measuring stick for how I feel about myself. It took several years for my mother to learn that when she criticises me, there is no place in my life for her. Until you can learn that you are a valuable human being because of you and how you feel about you, your successes will always be limited and hollow.

I know you were probably kidding with the statements about seeking a male sub to hit in anger, but it isn't actually very funny however it's rather applicable to the image you have created of yourself here. Other people are never an appropriate dumping ground for your own issues.

< Message edited by laurell3 -- 12/24/2007 6:56:24 PM >

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to kitttty)

Post #: 129

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 7:09:30 PM

BlackKnight

Posts: 767
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Charmed pe, it's a little far of a drive right now, sorry!

_____________________________

'Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.'
Life of Reason, Reason in Common Sense, Scribner's, 1905, page 284"
George Santayana

Just because I'm paranoid, doesn't mean they're not out to get me!

(in reply to laurell3)

Post #: 130

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 7:14:09 PM

charmdpetKeira

Posts: 916
Joined: 6/2/2007
Status: offline

I so look forward to the days, when distance is no longer an issue.

lol

k

< Message edited by charmdpetKeira -- 12/24/2007 7:15:05 PM >

_____________________________

Life is tough, that does not mean it isn't fair.

There is no wrong choice, only consequence.

(in reply to BlackKnight)

Post #: 131

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 7:15:59 PM

BlackKnight

Posts: 767
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Tease!

_____________________________

'Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.'
Life of Reason, Reason in Common Sense, Scribner's, 1905, page 284"
George Santayana

Just because I'm paranoid, doesn't mean they're not out to get me!

(in reply to charmdpetKeira)

Post #: 132

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 7:21:07 PM

charmdpetKeira

Posts: 916
Joined: 6/2/2007
Status: offline

:O Well, I never.... ok, maybe once or twice, but that's it... ;)

_____________________________

Life is tough, that does not mean it isn't fair.

There is no wrong choice, only consequence.

(in reply to BlackKnight)

Post #: 133

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 7:25:10 PM

BlackKnight

Posts: 767
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Just did!

_____________________________

'Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.'
Life of Reason, Reason in Common Sense, Scribner's, 1905, page 284"
George Santayana

Just because I'm paranoid, doesn't mean they're not out to get me!

(in reply to charmdpetKeira)

Post #: 134

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 7:31:46 PM

charmdpetKeira

Posts: 916
Joined: 6/2/2007
Status: offline

I didn't say when that once or twice was.. lol. My apologies, I will repent by going to work now.

best wishes

k

_____________________________

Life is tough, that does not mean it isn't fair.

There is no wrong choice, only consequence.

(in reply to BlackKnight)

Post #: 135

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 7:36:18 PM

BlackKnight

Posts: 767
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Safe journey, merry christmas, happy whatever you believe,
That explains why your owner wasn't flogging you.

_____________________________

'Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.'
Life of Reason, Reason in Common Sense, Scribner's, 1905, page 284"
George Santayana

Just because I'm paranoid, doesn't mean they're not out to get me!

(in reply to charmdpetKeira)

Post #: 136

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 7:43:56 PM

charmdpetKeira

Posts: 916
Joined: 6/2/2007
Status: offline

Hold the phone, maybe God does like me after all. I just called into work to let them know I was on my way and they said I didn’t have to go. Yeah, me! (It is my usual night off.)

Guess that means I will have to repent another way.

charmd

ps. thank you for the send off anyway.

_____________________________

Life is tough, that does not mean it isn't fair.

There is no wrong choice, only consequence.

(in reply to BlackKnight)

Post #: 137

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 7:45:35 PM

BlackKnight

Posts: 767
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

go get your owner to flog you!

_____________________________

'Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.'
Life of Reason, Reason in Common Sense, Scribner's, 1905, page 284"
George Santayana

Just because I'm paranoid, doesn't mean they're not out to get me!

(in reply to charmdpetKeira)

Post #: 138

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 7:46:12 PM

ThinkingKitten

Posts: 447
Joined: 6/15/2006
From: Ontari-ari-o
Status: offline

Lordy, lordy kitttty. Good thing you don't seem to have any actual enemies, 'cos everyone else in your life seems to be doing a fine job of filling in for them.

There's two sides to every story, and we're only hearing yours I know, but really, but like I said earlier: Whose life are you living anyway? Yours or theirs?

_____________________________

Thinking Kitten

If you can't stand the heat... tell the chef to get out of the kitchen.

(in reply to kitttty)

Post #: 139

RE: I fucked up my LSAT. I am going to cry. - 12/24/2007 7:48:25 PM

BlackKnight

Posts: 767
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Oh, another kitten without a profile!

_____________________________

'Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.'
Life of Reason, Reason in Common Sense, Scribner's, 1905, page 284"
George Santayana

Just because I'm paranoid, doesn't mean they're not out to get me!

(in reply to ThinkingKitten)

Post #: 140

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