Are these "houses" real or only a fantasy created by some fiction book?
These houses are very real as are the people who are involved in them.   The history available dates their existence as far back as 2000 years and they most likely existed before then in a less structured manner.  It is a common practice for people with similar ideals and interests to join together to share their experiences and needs, so the existence of these groups should not come as any great surprise to those who are aware of human behavioral sciences.  You may not see a sign hanging over the doorway of the little white house on the corner of 3rd and Maple Street that says "Joe's D/s House and Grill," but they are there, hidden from view and doing very nicely in our everyday society.

One of the things that has undermined the existence of these houses is the current fad D/s is undergoing.  It seems that every Tom, Dick and Harry has jumped on the band wagon and proclaimed themselves to be members of this or that house and boast of having their Masters degree in BDSM or D/s.  The truth is that most of them are charlatans who have found a way to give credence to their misuse of power and pitiful knowledge.   Their unfounded claims have planted more misunderstanding in this lifestyle than almost any other factor.  Be wise and have doubts about anyone who solicits you for enrollment in a "house" especially on the Internet or at scene clubs.  Most people who truly have roots in the old families are not about to proclaim it to the world.
1. How can I find a house to join? 
   In a few words; You probably can't.  Most of the members of these groups have family connections or have had a personal recommendation given by someone in the group that got them invited inside.  You are not going to find them listed in the Yellow Pages of your phonebook or on a matchbook cover from the Holiday Inn.   Membership is carefully screened and most belong by nature of their birth, meaning it was passed on from father to son. 
2. Why are these houses so secretive?
   Like any group that goes against the mainstream beliefs of the society within which it exits, there are carefully guarded standards about their establishment and being.   Five hundred years ago, such things were only considered bizarre and extreme but not criminal.  Today, with laws and concerns for human rights, such organizations fall into the jurisdiction of illegal activities or criminal acts.  It doesn't take an active imagination to consider the consequences for a group or individual discovered to be living a D/s lifestyle or to be practicing some of it's activities.  Remember that in many states it is still a crime to engage in oral or anal sex with your spouse.   Just think of what a group who advocates the practices found in BDSM would be facing.  Not a lovely thought, heh?  Then is it any wonder that you don't see billboards pointing out the way to "Joe's D/s House and Grill?"

quote:

How can I find a house to join? 

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

I prefer crappydom's dissertation on the ancient houses.  But I'm too lazy to search.

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

FR

But hey...CastleRealm is all just romance and innocence and light BDSM, right?

Everyone who has a beef with it is just bitter and lonely and jaded, and not a little annoyed by the completely unsubstantiated and unsupported misinformation presented on something claiming to be an "educational source" for newbies.

I guess when people say people should be more "open-minded" toward Castle Realm that they should let their brains fall out of their head.

quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveluci

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

FR

But hey...CastleRealm is all just romance and innocence and light BDSM, right?

Everyone who has a beef with it is just bitter and lonely and jaded, and not a little annoyed by the completely unsubstantiated and unsupported misinformation presented on something claiming to be an "educational source" for newbies.

I guess when people say people should be more "open-minded" toward Castle Realm that they should let their brains fall out of their head.

Come on, Mad Rabbit.  Ouch.  Your twisting what I said so badly it hurts.  I never said "everyone who has a beef with it is just bitter and lonely and jaded."  You know I did not say that.  I don't recall anyone else saying that.  What I said boiled down to this:  "OFTENtimes people who slam romanticism aren't currently experiencing it in their own lives.  Thus sites they consider too lite and romantic (like CR) sicken them."  

I don't support "completely unsubstantiated and unsupported misinformation" in any context, least of all in your response here insinuating that something was said that was not.  I also never indicated the site was "all just romance and innocence and light BDSM."  I do think some of the people bashing it indicated that's how they saw it.  In addition, I'm positive I never indicated it was an "educational source for newbies."  I hate the word "newbie" and I certainly don't see the group called "newbies" by others as all being so lacking in judgment and sense that they are all so easily lead or mislead by any one site. 

I don't think either one of us are apt to be the type to let our brains fall out.  But I question how your brain perceived what you read as being what you said above.  I didn't say that at all.  I may be assuming you were aiming that in my direction but since I actually wrote the words "lonely, bitter, and jaded," I don't think I'm in error here.  If you really think that's what I meant, I'm here to assure you that it in no way was...................luci

quote:

These houses are very real as are the people who are involved in them. The history available dates their existence as far back as 2000 years and they most likely existed before then in a less structured manner.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Julia- we've got a handful posting on the boards now who would assert that about themselves as well

I think the idea that there are solid families/houses which have been constantly and traditionally practicing what we Americans consider bdsm today is pretty fat fetched.   Most Americans don't have any traditions going back more than a few generations at all- it's pretty impressive if you're still a Daughter of the Revolution.

But it's not at all hard to believe there have always been kinky people who grouped themselves and enjoyed their fun as a community and called it a family/house- even in times of severe opression (perhaps even more so at those tiems).

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit
No, I don't think that is what you meant at all which is why I didn't mention you by name. I am sure it looks like I am twisting your words, but that isn't my intentions or motivations. I am glad you posted so I can clarify that I am not trying to pick on anyone and certainly not you

quote:

I am using those words to drive home an alternative viewpoint as to why people have an issue with CastleRealms. This is the reason why I asked for this essay to be posted for debate by people who had the links. The site didn't simply have fluffy romance or light BDSM, but things that were, in the mildest words, utter crap