Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Definition of Doormat?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: Definition of Doormat? Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/24/2007 3:10:24 PM   
OldBastardly1


Posts: 651
Joined: 7/22/2006
From: Atlanta, GA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

. 
This was the nicest way I have ever seen this put.  Well done, laurell.  I get tired of all the disparaging remarks made, as though someone without this ability must somehow be abolished from the earth, lol.  Typically, calling someone a "doormat" is way of insulting them for not meeting someone else's standards.

I also agree with LA.  There are times I have functioned as a doormat, as part of my service to to my Master - both metaphorically and literally (although he prefers a foot rest, he said).  I am happy being anything for him, so when he wants me to shut up and do something without thought, regardless of what I feel, I do so.  As I've said before, slap a daisy on my ass and let me say Welcome!

Doormat does not inherently mean something bad, in my opinion.  It might be unhealthy.  It might also be the healthiest thing for a person at that time.







< Message edited by OldBastardly1 -- 12/24/2007 3:11:27 PM >

_____________________________

Old Bastard

"You cannot make footprints in the sands of time if you're sitting on your butt. And who wants to make buttprints in the sands of time?" -- Bob Moawad



(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/24/2007 3:14:58 PM   
DarkDaddyZ


Posts: 805
Joined: 4/7/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tootsiepop

DarkDaddyZ...

If one chooses to back down to avoid an arguement or to resort to name calling (such as the second poster here did to me in an email) would that consitute a doormat?

I don't know the situation so I can't speak on that situation.  But if someone is in relationship where they HAVE to back down or are in a non consensual situation and are being verbally or mentality or especially physically abused they shouldn't be in that relationship.  If they chose to stay in that relationship for other reasons or do not have positive self esteem then they are allowing theirselves to be a doormat. It is up to them to get the resources to not be a doormat IF that is what they want.

quote:

If NOT taking someone to task for their actions because you know you are talking to a brick wall constitute a doormat?

Again I'm not really sure of the situation but if they there is a brick wall issue and problems in the relationship where both parties or one party isn't happy and there isn't communication then I would think there are problems.  While we all have problems, if there are situations that you don't talk about no matter how uncomfortable they are (and I've been in uncomfortable situations too) then it could be or could leave to a doormat relationship.

Z-

_____________________________

"Flirting is part of the job description." DJ Jesus (Lucy Daughter Of The Devil)

Vanilla Official Music Page http://www.myspace.com/djzulu

(in reply to tootsiepop)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/24/2007 3:31:20 PM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		doormat - mindless drone who enjoys being stepped on repeatedly 

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to tootsiepop)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/24/2007 3:57:17 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OldBastardly1

quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

. 
This was the nicest way I have ever seen this put.  Well done, laurell.  I get tired of all the disparaging remarks made, as though someone without this ability must somehow be abolished from the earth, lol.  Typically, calling someone a "doormat" is way of insulting them for not meeting someone else's standards.

I also agree with LA.  There are times I have functioned as a doormat, as part of my service to to my Master - both metaphorically and literally (although he prefers a foot rest, he said).  I am happy being anything for him, so when he wants me to shut up and do something without thought, regardless of what I feel, I do so.  As I've said before, slap a daisy on my ass and let me say Welcome!

Doormat does not inherently mean something bad, in my opinion.  It might be unhealthy.  It might also be the healthiest thing for a person at that time.








Um...that was funny?  It wasn't meant to be but hey if you got a laugh over it, yay to you!

Oh, unless it was the daisy comment.

(in reply to OldBastardly1)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/24/2007 4:44:41 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		Cynical definition: a doormat is someone who will do things I won't.
Corollary: a princess or wannabe is someone who won't do things I will.

Real one: someone who allows others to treat them in an unhealthy manner for them.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/24/2007 6:34:14 PM   
OldBastardly1


Posts: 651
Joined: 7/22/2006
From: Atlanta, GA
Status: offline 		Actually, I didn't think the daisy thing was funny.

_____________________________

Old Bastard

"You cannot make footprints in the sands of time if you're sitting on your butt. And who wants to make buttprints in the sands of time?" -- Bob Moawad



(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/24/2007 7:04:59 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		any womans profile that starts out ---- if you are looking for a doormat---or any variation of same; is one...

Ron

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to OldBastardly1)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/24/2007 8:18:55 PM   
lauren0221


Posts: 681
Joined: 8/29/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

any womans profile that starts out ---- if you are looking for a doormat---or any variation of same; is one...

Ron


Running off to revise profile now:)

(in reply to mnottertail)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/24/2007 9:48:54 PM   
Knightenslaves


Posts: 28
Joined: 1/6/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tootsiepop

Could You please tell me Your definitions of 'doormat'?

Thank You,

~tootsiepop

Added: What exactly are the actions one does that defines them as such? Not just 'walked over'... but in what way? W/we all get walked over.


Someone who out of being naive, fearful or any multitude of reasons allows those in a Dominant mindset or action set to harm them in either a physical, emotional or mental way.

(in reply to tootsiepop)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/24/2007 11:01:24 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OldBastardly1

Actually, I didn't think the daisy thing was funny.


Aww, too bad.  I made myself laugh when I came up with that one. 

Then again, I'm a dork like that.

(in reply to OldBastardly1)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/25/2007 10:31:25 AM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

Cynical definition: a doormat is someone who will do things I won't.
Corollary: a princess or wannabe is someone who won't do things I will.

Real one: someone who allows others to treat them in an unhealthy manner for them.


I loved this celeste, and it is so true. It is a subjective thing.


_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to DesFIP)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/25/2007 12:25:28 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tootsiepop

DarkDaddyZ...

If one chooses to back down to avoid an arguement or to resort to name calling (such as the second poster here did to me in an email) would that consitute a doormat?

If NOT taking someone to task for their actions because you know you are talking to a brick wall constitute a doormat?

Thanks,

~t


Nope, you aren't by that a doormat. But by referring to emails which you could be coloring or making up, and referring to pms on the board you do show yourself to be passive aggressive.

Which, fyi, is not a good thing.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to tootsiepop)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/26/2007 4:14:53 PM   
Evility


Posts: 915
Joined: 12/19/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tootsiepop
Could You please tell me Your definitions of 'doormat'?


My definition of a doormat in a BDSM context is:

doormat: noun:  A name that submissive A uses to refer to submissive B when submissive B will do things that submissive A refuses to do.



(in reply to tootsiepop)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/26/2007 4:32:56 PM   
girlygurl


Posts: 6973
Joined: 8/5/2007
From: in the palms of His hands
Status: offline 		Of course we'll all have different views of what a doormat is...... here's mine:

A doormat is one that does not express pleasure or displeasure..... this person may chose to be a doormat, but non the less, their thoughts/feelings are not an issue... if I were being literal, a doormat is what we use to wipe our feet, so then, it's an object we use and discard once it's dirty and unsightly. 

IMO "if" I were treated as a doormat (and accepting the treatment) then I'd have very low self esteem. 

PLEASE don't interpret my statement as a demeaning comment... that's not what I was after.  I'm talking about me personally, that's all. 

 
girly

< Message edited by girlygurl -- 12/26/2007 4:37:56 PM >

(in reply to IrishMist)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/26/2007 4:40:14 PM   
girlygurl


Posts: 6973
Joined: 8/5/2007
From: in the palms of His hands
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Evility

doormat: noun:  A name that submissive A uses to refer to submissive B when submissive B will do things that submissive A refuses to do.


Just submissives huh? 

girly

(in reply to Evility)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/26/2007 4:46:14 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tootsiepop

I'm sorry but this is directed to Master's, Mistresses, Dominants, Domme's... or did I get the heading wrong?

Thanks...

I was chastized by the previous poster for wanting to direct this question to Dominant's... for it is Their definitions I am interested in. Which is why I posted in 'ASK A MASTER' and not in 'ASK A SUBMISSIVE'... if this offends, so sorry.


As the moderators have stated, anyone can post anywhere. If these rules are unsuitable to you, there are more strict forums elsewhere. As it happens, I frequently post here as I feel that that more knowledge is gained from a variety of answers and because I have my owner's permission to speak for him when I know his mind. If that offends you... well I really don't care.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to tootsiepop)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/26/2007 4:53:29 PM   
girlygurl


Posts: 6973
Joined: 8/5/2007
From: in the palms of His hands
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

As the moderators have stated, anyone can post anywhere. If these rules are unsuitable to you, there are more strict forums elsewhere. As it happens, I frequently post here as I feel that that more knowledge is gained from a variety of answers and because I have my owner's permission to speak for him when I know his mind. If that offends you... well I really don't care.


AquaticSub you rock!

girly

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/26/2007 7:53:39 PM   
goodgirl08


Posts: 145
Joined: 6/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

Real one: someone who allows others to treat them in an unhealthy manner for them.


Yeah...bingo

(in reply to girlygurl)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/26/2007 7:56:07 PM   
IdiotMale


Posts: 132
Joined: 10/5/2005
Status: offline 		A doormat is a good slave.

(in reply to goodgirl08)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Definition of Doormat? - 12/26/2007 8:18:41 PM   
TheScrivener


Posts: 91
Joined: 8/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

I am happy being anything for him, so when he wants me to shut up and do something without thought, regardless of what I feel, I do so. 



I realize this is simply a way of showing your devotion to your Dominant, but this is the kind of mindset that scares me.  Loyalty and submission are wonderful, but you should always be mindful of how you feel.  It doesn't have to come out, and it doesn't mean you have to back talk, but still.  I worry about submissives when they say something like that.

Simply my opinion on the matter.  I imagine it works quite fine in your relationship, yet, I do hope that other submissives don't emulate the same ideal.

Submissives should be loyal, not mindless.

I personally find doormats to be rather boring.  Nice for cleaning mud off of my shoes though.

< Message edited by TheScrivener -- 12/26/2007 8:20:49 PM >

_____________________________

"We are the facilitators of our own creative evolution."

- Bill Hicks


(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: Definition of Doormat? Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.105