RE: calling all dominants (Full Version)

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FullCircle -> RE: calling all dominants (12/31/2007 5:18:41 PM)

That isn't a dream my friend it is a nightmare, you need to look to the future or you will spend the rest of your life living in the past.[8|]



FullCircle -> RE: calling all dominants (12/31/2007 5:29:53 PM)

Sorry that was a bit Operaish I know this is the time of year for looking back is all but it never really helps.



unforegvn -> RE: calling all dominants (12/31/2007 5:35:13 PM)

I fell completely apart; once.  If either of us wanted the relationship to work we would still be together we are still friends oddly enough.



ShaktiSama -> RE: calling all dominants (12/31/2007 5:38:17 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Prinsexx

Why is it that Doms never seem to let their submissives know they fall apart without the submission?


Of course they do.  Geez, haven't you ever seen The Phantom of the Opera?  [:D] 



zhouwuatsien -> RE: calling all dominants (12/31/2007 7:22:29 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: ShaktiSama

quote:

ORIGINAL: Prinsexx

Why is it that Doms never seem to let their submissives know they fall apart without the submission?


Of course they do.  Geez, haven't you ever seen The Phantom of the Opera?   


INSTANT WIN!!!  OH MY GOD...  Phantom of the Opera was a Daddy Dom, all the way!!!

---

I have a heart even when my submissive and I are together.  When she's gone, I don't fall apart, but a part of me dies.  I think that you have to look at this in a few ways.  For one a Dominant does have to make the submissive a part of them in order to control her, to become with her.  However, as a relationship, as a dependency, if a Master loses the slave then that part of him that was dedicate to their slave dies with the relationship.  If a Master believes that they cannot Live without the Slave, then the Master will fall apart.

I Loved that deeply once, and afterwards I never Loved like that again.

It's not worth it.

It doesn't mean I didn't Love my ex slaves or Love my current slaves.  All it means is that I can't make any slave or slaves so integral a part of me that I cannot function without them.



PsyVamp -> RE: calling all dominants (12/31/2007 8:46:55 PM)

I always have my little goodbyes... each person affects me differently.
My first I remember to this day, miss him very slightly as things that happened over 20 years ago don't have so much hold on me.

And I love each and every one that I get involved with on a D/s level, how can you not?  To me it seems an involvement of so much more than just the mind, which is why I am so very meticulous and picky.

But fall apart?  No, I would not fall apart.  I would grieve and give myself a moment in time to do justice to a memory, but fall apart is not in my nature.

Lady Jag



ShaktiSama -> RE: calling all dominants (12/31/2007 8:52:43 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: zhouwuatsien
INSTANT WIN!!!  OH MY GOD...  Phantom of the Opera was a Daddy Dom, all the way!!!


Totally.  I've always viewed the story as a sad tale of a dominant losing his submissive to her vanilla boyfriend.  [>:]



zhouwuatsien -> RE: calling all dominants (1/1/2008 12:19:50 AM)

...I don't know why, but it seems more romantic in that context.  More romantic for the Vanilla side.

I remember seeing Phantom of the Opera from box seats when I was five.  I saw it twelve more times after the first.  And I barely understood it at all, I was so young.



AnnabelHell -> RE: calling all dominants (1/1/2008 2:56:07 AM)

I am Dominant not inhuman. Of course I have feelings and miss the people I become attached to. In any long term relationship where you depend on or have emotional feelings for someone there's an adjustment when it ends. There are people who have relationships where there's no emotion at all, but I suspect most of us put more of ourselves into things than that. I mourned my last girl for a very long time before I was ready to even think of someone new. I didn't feel less Dominant for it.



Level -> RE: calling all dominants (1/1/2008 3:24:36 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Prinsexx

.....have you hearts? and did you miss her? the one? the first one? the only one? or do you miss one of many? when she is gone?



Very much so.



mons -> RE: calling all dominants (1/1/2008 3:55:59 AM)

greetings to all

i miss him he was great but it was not to be. but i am so surprise at how many Dom's have a heart? let me explain i was rest by a father who was nuts a mother who was strong but was scare to death of him i had a brother who abuse me as a child and as an adult so my feeling are excuse were men do not have a soul or heart . i am so wrong i see and learned . each one of us can be hurt and have feelings that can not forget, my slave are all white i am black i guess it is my past . and guess what i can not even stand the thought of one of them touching me. yes i am in therapy and will find out how to get pas this . but it is something for me to see that yes a dom can be hurt just as i can be hurt. i mean no disrespect to anyone here. i was just surprised . i do have things i do that takes up all of my time i build doll house adult ones oh lol i saw a doll house doll who was a dom me i was lol shock i should had brought it . ok enough
and yes i do look for him at times

mons



Elorin -> RE: calling all dominants (1/1/2008 5:18:56 AM)

quote:

Why is it that Doms never seem to let their submissibes know they fall apart without the submission?

Perhaps because they don't fall apart without submission. Perhaps because they feel that 
quote:

When he lets feelings of self worth and vulnerability get to him he simply makes these beautiful women feel unsafe.
 
I know my Dom doesn't talk a lot about vulnerability and pain because he considers it giving power over to the one who can hurt him. And when he is damaged and hurting his reflex is to protect himself, not bare his belly to be hurt further. We've gone round and round on that circle together, that I need to know he feels and can hurt, and he needs to be reaffirmed not hurt deeper when he makes himself that vulnerable. Our mutual reactions when arguing are such that we throw up walls that drive each other further apart, unfortunately, as he goes into defensive mode and I begin pushing and taunting trying to get SOME evidence I'm not the only one hurting.
quote:

.....have you hearts? and did you miss her? the one? the first one? the only one? or do you miss one of many? when she is gone?

I have a heart and miss every submissive I've had. Some days more than others, some more often than others. But when walking down memory lane I can remember why it was in the first place, and the good times, and I miss the sub, even though parting was necessary for one reason or another. But I don't fall apart when submission is gone.



malus -> RE: calling all dominants (1/1/2008 6:03:54 AM)

Tal and Greetings..to answer your question..yes i do miss her desperately..does that make me weak in the eyes of some?only to those that i don't care are watching..how can you not mourn the loss of someone that is so close to you..unless of course you were never that close to begin with.



scottjk -> RE: calling all dominants (1/1/2008 6:35:51 AM)

Having read some of this thread and at the risk of sounding like a 'me too'...

I love six women in my life with all my heart. Two vanilla, one I married, divorced and stand at uneasy peace with, three have been slaves under my hands and there's a void in my chest whenever I touch those memories. Every one of them had been a precious gem in my 'bag 'o marbles', and my loss of them from my life was a nearly intolerable event.

Like the 'bag 'o marbles' mentioned, once they're spilled, it takes time to regather them, and there's almost always a few missing.

I said six, and only mentioned five. :)
The sixth woman in my life is my little girl, living with her mother about 3,000 miles away. I'd like to think that our 'semi-evolved successors' are the men and women in our lives that we can rely on loving us to a fault, regardless of how foolish we are. :)




malus -> RE: calling all dominants (1/1/2008 7:13:30 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: malus

Tal and Greetings..to answer your question..yes i do miss her desperately..does that make me weak in the eyes of some?only to those that i don't care are watching..how can you not mourn the loss of someone that is so close to you..unless of course you were never that close to begin with.




malus -> RE: calling all dominants (1/1/2008 7:21:34 AM)

Is there no delete on this thing lol?



Gwynvyd -> RE: calling all dominants (1/1/2008 7:41:24 AM)

Well Prinsexx, you already know my heart on my boy who is no longer with me.. and he is being quite a prat at the moment..

I love and miss him dearly.. but just as of today finaly made up my mind to stop hurting myself over it and stop hoping he would pull his head out of his arse.

Was I a wreck? Yes.. for once I actualy was... Do I miss him.. yes of course... what would I do if he were to magicaly show up on my door step after he comes back from London.. prob. give him a good swift kick in the bullocks, and close the door at the moment. That is unless he slipped legal papers under the door or had them out visable before my foot could make contact.

As for the other subs.. well they are still with me.. one for 10 years, one for 8 years, and one for 6 years. No need to miss. They are all still with me. the one for 10 yrs is moving back to my state so as to continue his training. He is getting a transfer here in Law school. ( sweet of him eh?)
I have only perm. released one sub.. and he was on trail basis.. do I miss him.. no... not really.. only when I get a sadistic streak a mile wide.. and really want to hurt some one. ( he was Gods own pain slut~ and screamed really nicely ) He was a pushy lil bastard, unconciderate, and not my cup of tea.

Being a Dom/me or not when someone you care about leaves you miss them..if you cared for them. This whole macho "I'm a Dom/me I cant show emotion" BS is just that BS... we are people. We bleed, we cry, we pine, we hurt.. just like everyone else. We are held to a higher standard sometimes where we have to keep ourselves in check because we have others we are still taking care of.. but it is all still there.

Read my multiply acct sometime.. you will see just how human I am.

Gwyn



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