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RE: The difference... - 1/13/2008 8:14:59 AM   
Rover


Posts: 2634
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline 		Admittedly, agreement on BDSM definitions are exceptionally elusive.  Still, the difference between Top and Dominant enjoys more consensus than most (which is not to say that it's universal).

quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696

I love your French

but Tops was not introduced by me.


I'm sure you're right... it was your use of it that I happened to notice.

quote:


But if you explain me why a Master/Dom is not a Top, then we can leave it out. Till then...i think there are 3 options.


I believe I stated that rather clearly in my previous post.  A Top may also be a Dominant, but not necessarily so.  Just as a Top may also be a Catholic.  But a Top does not have to be a Dominant, nor a Catholic.  It's really not too difficult to grasp.
 
It's related to the different aspects of BDSM.  A Top can engage in B/D and S/M, but have no interest in D/S.  In fact, that is a rather common occurance.  Conversely, a Dominant can be interested in D/S without engaging in B/D and S/M.  And although that is less common, it's hardly unheard of.

quote:


As you said, they are not the same.


So if they are not the same, why did you say that they are?
 
John




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(in reply to Justme696)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: The difference... - 1/13/2008 8:18:43 AM   
Justme696


Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
Status: offline
quote:

quote:


As you said, they are not the same.



So if they are not the same, why did you say that they are?

John


I clearly stated you said that they were not the same. (made it red)
As we talk about the lifestyle here and not religions...for me (that means it is an opinion) Master and Dom(mes) are Tops.

(in reply to Rover)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: The difference... - 1/13/2008 8:31:49 AM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		Well for you that opinion may work... but a dominant can actually be topped by their own submissive. A submissive can top another submissive.... etc. Top to me denotes a verb more than a noun or title... although people can refer to themselves as a "top" because they have no desire to have a power exchange dynamic. Just like a masochist can refer to themselves as a bottom for only being in that position during a scene...

It really is all in what someone wants to call themselves, we all self label. I thought I would point out that many people use the terms the way that Rover does


_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to Justme696)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: The difference... - 1/13/2008 8:36:38 AM   
Justme696


Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
Status: offline 		Yes that is a possible view also.
Would love to see more opinions.

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: The difference... - 1/13/2008 8:45:04 AM   
Arrrchibald


Posts: 350
Joined: 1/3/2008
Status: offline 		Doms are omnivorous, fly south for the winter, and shed their skin twice per year. 
Masters are flightless birds, hibernate for the winter, and only come out at night to feed on the flesh of the living. 

Doms are made of candy and leave presents under your pillow when you have happy dreams. 
Masters can smell your sins and steal pieces of your soul every time your photo is taken. 

Doms are elusive creatures, and while many wildlife enthusiasts have claimed to see one, authentic video footage has yet to be confirmed. 
Masters are a growing pest in many agricultural areas.  Do your part to control the master population by spraying your house for masters semi-annually. 

(in reply to MRandme)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: The difference... - 1/13/2008 10:00:14 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arrrchibald

Doms are omnivorous, fly south for the winter, and shed their skin twice per year. 
Masters are flightless birds, hibernate for the winter, and only come out at night to feed on the flesh of the living. 

Doms are made of candy and leave presents under your pillow when you have happy dreams. 
Masters can smell your sins and steal pieces of your soul every time your photo is taken. 

Doms are elusive creatures, and while many wildlife enthusiasts have claimed to see one, authentic video footage has yet to be confirmed. 
Masters are a growing pest in many agricultural areas.  Do your part to control the master population by spraying your house for masters semi-annually. 



Thanks for making me laugh my soda through my nose...dammit!

(at least I didn't spray the monitor this time, though...LOL)

(in reply to Arrrchibald)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: The difference... - 1/13/2008 11:02:08 AM   
Padriag


Posts: 2633
Joined: 3/30/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MRandme

What is the difference between a Master and a Dom?

Personal opinion

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Padriag

A stern discipline pervades all nature, which is a little cruel so that it may be very kind - Edmund Spencer

(in reply to MRandme)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: The difference... - 1/13/2008 12:04:02 PM   
meticulousgirl


Posts: 969
Joined: 2/20/2007
Status: offline 		They are mainly just labels.  my Owner and i have our own classifications that We just keep between Us. 

the labels are what you personally make them to be, choose from them as you see fit.  In many ways it's like choosing a label for yourself or for you to call the Dom of choice....some Doms dont like being called Master, some prefer to be call Sir, Master Sir, Lord etc....it's all in preference.

~meticulous~

(in reply to cherrypez)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: The difference... - 1/13/2008 2:37:34 PM   
girlygurl


Posts: 6973
Joined: 8/5/2007
From: in the palms of His hands
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

quote:

ORIGINAL: girlygurl

quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

Begging your pardon... WHAT???  Earned and given??  Okay, I just knew it!  I KNEW there was this big club that nobody was letting me know about, and NOW you tell me they give titles.  What is it gonna be next?  Trophies??  Yep, they're giving out trophies, aren't they??

Cali



Cali~ They get a badge and learn the secret handshake, yep, that's what defines them alright.

girly


Well geez girly... so when he told me to reach out my hand with a firm grip and give "this" a few pumps up and down... THAT was the secret handshake???  Who knew??? I think I need more practice.

Cali



Oh great Cali, you've just shared the "secret hand shake" with everyone!  
mmmmm practice is such a good thing! 
girly

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happily forever one

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Profile   Post #: 49
RE: The difference... - 1/13/2008 3:08:51 PM   
Redoubt


Posts: 185
Joined: 8/11/2007
Status: offline 		I haven't seen anyone chime in with this yet, so I thought I'd add it.

Master is typically used to refer to one who has achieved supremacy in a given area. This is often a matter of opinion. It has far more weight when used by a third party when referring to ability in said given area.

Dominant refers to one's preference or inclination in a relationship.

Anyone referring to themselves as "Master" without sufficient credentials to back it up is usually hung up on their own self worth. The term means nothing unless others recognize it as being earned. Those who have earned this title do not need to let everyone know they are one. They can simply show you, or are confident enough in themselves to expect you will find out.

Addressing someone as Master confers your recognition to their ability or position. i.e. skill with a whip, or their ownership of you.

Addressing someone as "a dom" infers your opinion of their inclination in a relationship.

As for "Top", simply describes who is the do-er rather than the do-ee in a scene thats happening or a scene that will happen.

As these are all titles, they are labels, and totally subject to one's own opinion or viewpoint. Best to take all with a grain of salt. After all, a Master can still be submissive to his/her father/mother and still be a master, likewise a slave can still run a successful company as the dominant leader of said organization.

(in reply to girlygurl)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: The difference... - 1/13/2008 3:14:39 PM   
Justme696


Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
Status: offline 		@Redoubt
nice point of view.
Here in Europe Master is often used for certain old trades (black smith, butcher) when the worker is very skilled. How could we forget that option

(in reply to Redoubt)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: The difference... - 1/15/2008 7:42:20 PM   
MRandme


Posts: 661
Joined: 9/24/2007
Status: offline 		Thought i'd add this in...

i had the opportunity to discuss this with my Master and He said that He felt that Dominant was a role, Master was a title. At least, that is what the discussion boiled down to. *grin* 

It was very interesting to see the take everyone else had on the topic.

g


_____________________________

And thus i conclude with a wish you go well,
Sweet be your dreams, may your happiness swell,
I'll leave you here, for my journey begins
i've gone to be with Him again...

(in reply to Justme696)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: The difference... - 1/15/2008 7:47:41 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline 		He takes a huge amount of responsibility for me and he calls himself a dom.

To my mind the difference is between those who don't micromanage and those who do. Micromanagement of course being defined as controlling those things I don't think need to be controlled by another

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


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Profile   Post #: 53
RE: The difference... - 1/15/2008 9:49:20 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		Since I haven't seen anyone from my school of thought post....

To some of us, these are the definitions we use:
Top/bottom - physical roles
Dom/sub - mental roles
Master/slave - spiritual roles

The three can be combined in any way. For example, I know many Masters and Doms who like to bottom on occassion and I know many slaves and subs who like to Top. However, the most familiar combinations are Master/Dom/Top and slave/sub/bottom.

Master Fire


_____________________________

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(in reply to MRandme)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: The difference... - 1/15/2008 11:26:53 PM   
Justme696


Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

Since I haven't seen anyone from my school of thought post....

To some of us, these are the definitions we use:
Top/bottom - physical roles
Dom/sub - mental roles
Master/slave - spiritual roles

The three can be combined in any way. For example, I know many Masters and Doms who like to bottom on occassion and I know many slaves and subs who like to Top. However, the most familiar combinations are Master/Dom/Top and slave/sub/bottom.

Master Fire



Thank you for that interesting view. Gonna think about it (how it fits to me)

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Profile   Post #: 55
RE: The difference... - 1/16/2008 10:17:41 AM   
kuuntuli


Posts: 17
Joined: 11/3/2007
Status: offline 		I don't think I've ever heard my master call himself a master. He calls himself a dom. But he is my master. I think that a master is someone who masters some skill, for example. If somone want to call themself a master just to boost their ego, by all means do so, but I generally won't call them that unless I really see them as a master of something. If they are someone else's master I may refer to them as their master, though.

(Please tell me if it's considered inappropriate for me to answer to a question on this area, since I am not a dominant myself. I only started reading these message boards few weeks ago and I don't know if there's some protocol to this.)

< Message edited by kuuntuli -- 1/16/2008 10:20:44 AM >

(in reply to Justme696)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: The difference... - 1/16/2008 10:24:04 AM   
Justme696


Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kuuntuli

I don't think I've ever heard my master call himself a master. He calls himself a dom. But he is my master. I think that a master is someone who masters some skill, for example. If somone want to call themself a master just to boost their ego, by all means do so, but I generally won't call them that unless I really see them as a master of something. If they are someone else's master I may refer to them as their master, though.

(Please tell me if it's considered inappropriate for me to answer to a question on this area, since I am not a dominant myself. I only started reading these message boards few weeks ago and I don't know if there's some protocol to this.)


As a Master I find you can have your opinion and speak it out....even loud. If I don't like it..I stop reading  and shouldn't visit a forum.

Welcome btw, I hope you enjoy beeing here ;)


but explain me this contradiction
quote:

But he is my master.

quote:

but I generally won't call them that



< Message edited by Justme696 -- 1/16/2008 10:25:52 AM >

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Profile   Post #: 57
RE: The difference... - 1/16/2008 10:26:23 AM   
kuuntuli


Posts: 17
Joined: 11/3/2007
Status: offline 		Good! Following protocols is not my strongest side. :D

(in reply to Justme696)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: The difference... - 1/16/2008 10:51:01 AM   
Justme696


Posts: 3236
Joined: 1/7/2008
From: Royal kingdom of the Netherlands
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kuuntuli

Good! Following protocols is not my strongest side. :D


can you answer the second part of my post too please ;)  I am curious


_____________________________

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Profile   Post #: 59
RE: The difference... - 1/16/2008 11:52:42 AM   
Dnomyar


Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline 		Master, Dom , verbs, nouns, top, bottom. I cant take this anymore.

(in reply to Justme696)
Profile   Post #: 60
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