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RE: on patronising subs - 1/19/2008 3:35:03 PM   
softness


Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline 		kind unsolicted opinions are always welcome ... if you had said i had an ass the size of Wales ... that would be a different matter!

_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio





(in reply to Lordandmaster)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: on patronising subs - 1/19/2008 4:20:45 PM   
Honsoku


Posts: 422
Joined: 6/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: softness
... bite me


quote:


bite me as well ....... what kind of candy??


No wonder you get patronizing comments, you keep topping from the bottom! The doms will bite you when and if they feel like it!

Be careful about asking me to do the same, as I've been known to take requests...

(in reply to softness)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: on patronising subs - 1/19/2008 4:53:55 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: softness

and so from what you say ... its ok for them to be patronising because i have that picture up?



I wouldn't say that. But my general advice is that if you want to avoid the stupid, take the picture down.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to softness)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: on patronising subs - 1/19/2008 5:09:14 PM   
CalifChick


Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
Status: offline 		Sorry about the age thing... I was helping an 18 yr old with their profile and I had that on the brain.  Other than that, ditto what Aqua said.  It's never OKAY for someone to be patronizing... just don't be surprised.

Cali

< Message edited by CalifChick -- 1/19/2008 5:11:07 PM >

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: on patronising subs - 1/19/2008 5:39:25 PM   
slaveluci


Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: softness
so how do you deal with being patronised by Dominants purely on the basis that as a submissive they can pat you on the head and say "never mind"

The same way I'd deal with anyone who thought they could "pat" me "on the head" and patronize me and say "never mind" to my thoughts - I'd dismiss them from my life and move along to people worth conversing with..........luci

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to softness)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: on patronising subs - 1/19/2008 7:47:50 PM   
salilus


Posts: 201
Joined: 5/18/2007
Status: offline 		While I actually really like someone patronising me, I'd probably get offended if it was a complete stranger on the internet that did it.  Daddy can do it and it just makes me blush and get all soft and there are friends of ours, that we've known for a while, that can do it and I just blush and get 'enjoyably' humiliated.

I do remember, when I was single, being treated like that on occasion. I usually ignored it, I think, because I don't remember how I 'handled' it! lol

< Message edited by salilus -- 1/19/2008 7:48:35 PM >

(in reply to softness)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: on patronising subs - 1/19/2008 8:35:05 PM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline 		A nice piece of chocolate

or some bubble gum

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: on patronising subs - 1/19/2008 9:34:13 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline 		It's just what happens when you let the small head direct the course of the big one.

Ask them to go jerk off, and write you again ten minutes later.

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to softness)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: on patronising subs - 1/19/2008 9:34:28 PM   
sexyred1


Posts: 8998
Joined: 8/9/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: softness

and so from what you say ... its ok for them to be patronising because i have that picture up?



I wouldn't say that. But my general advice is that if you want to avoid the stupid, take the picture down.


Taking her photo down will not avoid the stupid. Why should she have to do that? Stupid will be there waiting around regardless of photos.

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: on patronising subs - 1/19/2008 10:11:14 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

Taking her photo down will not avoid the stupid. Why should she have to do that? Stupid will be there waiting around regardless of photos.


It's been my experience that taking the picture down greatly reduces the stupid. If you want to avoid it and having the picture up doesn't matter to you *shrugs*

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: on patronising subs - 1/20/2008 4:48:04 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		Because of stupid people, we(generic) cannot put up the images or dress the way we want because it attracts the wrong type of attention?
 
So in other words, we now really do have to take care about what we wear and say and what photos we have up because it might attract the 'stupid'.  How utterly dull and takes away a persons right to be who they are and instead be who we are supposed to be, just so stupidity isn't given an open door?
 
I will go out dressed as a nun tomorrow.
 
the.dark.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: on patronising subs - 1/20/2008 4:55:02 AM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: softness

and so from what you say ... its ok for them to be patronising because i have that picture up?



I wouldn't say that. But my general advice is that if you want to avoid the stupid, take the picture down.


Taking her photo down will not avoid the stupid. Why should she have to do that? Stupid will be there waiting around regardless of photos.


perhaps they have a picture up because they want an actual chance of finding a Master? Men are visual creatures. It may be fine for you, but you already have your Master.

My advice is to use your delete and block buttons. Just dont let the stupid ones bug you. There are everywhere.

< Message edited by lusciouslips19 -- 1/20/2008 4:57:00 AM >

(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: on patronising subs - 1/20/2008 6:19:54 AM   
softness


Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

Because of stupid people, we(generic) cannot put up the images or dress the way we want because it attracts the wrong type of attention?
 
So in other words, we now really do have to take care about what we wear and say and what photos we have up because it might attract the 'stupid'.  How utterly dull and takes away a persons right to be who they are and instead be who we are supposed to be, just so stupidity isn't given an open door?
 
I will go out dressed as a nun tomorrow.
 
the.dark.

 
 
my sentiments exactly


_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio





(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: on patronising subs - 1/20/2008 6:30:24 AM   
lauren0221


Posts: 681
Joined: 8/29/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sexyred1

Taking her photo down will not avoid the stupid. Why should she have to do that? Stupid will be there waiting around regardless of photos.


I think I got a message from Stupid just yesterday:)

And if a picture brings out the Stupid, then probably ahead of the game to know sooner rather than later?

(in reply to sexyred1)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: on patronising subs - 1/20/2008 6:39:20 AM   
dawntreader


Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline 		Greetings softness :-)
 
While it is unfortunate that you have been patronized by these individuals, i would remind you of the type site we are on. It is a kink, alternative lifestyle,  BDSM site available worldwide. We have every right to post a picture, a post and a journal entry... just as the stupid and clueless have every right to cmail and comment. We cannot change them, only how we react to them. Let it blow right over you ~
 
j
 
p.s. And take the candy

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to softness)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: on patronising subs - 1/20/2008 10:47:44 AM   
HalloweenWhite


Posts: 1028
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline 		Being patronising is never excuseable be it from a vanilla or lifestyle person, I'm surprised you were calm-if you'd said you were pissed off with what they'd said they'd think twice about it and wouldn't have dismissed it the way they seem to.

(in reply to softness)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: on patronising subs - 1/20/2008 10:52:40 AM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark

Because of stupid people, we(generic) cannot put up the images or dress the way we want because it attracts the wrong type of attention?
 
So in other words, we now really do have to take care about what we wear and say and what photos we have up because it might attract the 'stupid'.  How utterly dull and takes away a persons right to be who they are and instead be who we are supposed to be, just so stupidity isn't given an open door?
 
I will go out dressed as a nun tomorrow.
 
the.dark.

 
No. That isn't what I'm saying at all.
 
It was a suggestion, the same as you might suggest someone who has complained that they got a lot stupid e-mails about their breasts to choose a picture that doesn't have full frontal nudity.
 
As I said, I've found it to greatly reduce the stupid and if you don't feel like dealing with the stupid, taking the picture down is one option.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: on patronising subs - 1/20/2008 11:02:48 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

It was a suggestion, the same as you might suggest someone who has complained that they got a lot stupid e-mails about their breasts to choose a picture that doesn't have full frontal nudity.
 
As I said, I've found it to greatly reduce the stupid and if you don't feel like dealing with the stupid, taking the picture down is one option.


ME?  - I would not suggest someone should take down a picture of their breasts or no full frontal nudity to avoid stupid emails.  I would say, ignore the stupid emails and concentrate on the not stupid ones.  Getting worked up over something like that feeds and is giving them power over you.
Yes an image does bring out the stupid people, but it does allow you to sift them out much earlier.  I believe it much worse to pretend to be something you are not and if it makes her happy to have such a gorgeous photo up, then she rocks for doing it.
Frankly, it isn't just dominants that patronise submissives and submissives aren;t the only people patronised.  Its just the crazy world we inhabit hey.
 
the.dark.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: on patronising subs - 1/20/2008 11:07:09 AM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline 		*Shrugs* You wouldn't, others would. Personally, I find it easier to not have to hit block and delete because they aren't in my inbox.

Like I said, it's one option that I wanted to suggest in case it appealed. I'm not trying to preach the "one twue way" of avoiding the stupid. Some people don't care about having their photo up regardless if they are looking or not and I'm not a mind-reader.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: on patronising subs - 1/20/2008 11:09:40 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline 		Candy from Kana

That just sounds kinky

Or like a bad rap song.

Thanks DT.

(in reply to dawntreader)
Profile   Post #: 40
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