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DesFIP -> RE: BDSM SNOBS (1/25/2008 6:13:05 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: RoughFN
quote:
ORIGINAL: DesFIP
Your analogy is somewhat flawed. Look at the example as you presented it, and note the part that I put in bold. You say yourself that you'd seek out an expert and talk to them so as to figure out what you're doing before you try to jump into the middle of things.
I would say, by extension, that asking on collarme for advise and suggestions before going to local clubs or doing your own play is the exact same thing. Seeking out an expert and asking them.
Now, I will admit that one major difference is that your hypothetical golf pro is getting paid to offer up his insight and knowledge whereas we here are not (anyone that wants to pay me for advise is welcome!), but we're also not obligated to provide any help, so I think the two evens out. All volunteer.
The next paragraph you go on about asking other people for help...which is what the new people are doing. So what's the problem with it?
Rough, apparently I wasn't clear. I applaud those who come in, are frank about being newbies and ask for advice. The ones who come in, declare that at age 18 they have years of experience, and then tell everyone else the one true way are the ones who get flamed and rightfully. Actually, anyone who shows up at any age and says they are the only true dominants because they trained in ancient European houses, are old leather despite being young and straight, or have read two whole books and now know everything deserve to be treated the same way they're treating the rest of us, which is rudely.
We were all new at one time. The difference is being honest about it, asking people you admire for help, or come in afraid to be shown up as not knowing anything and then opening their mouths and proving it. I was never flamed as a newbie because I didn't tell everyone else what they were doing was wrong. I just stated what we do and then asked a specific question. Oh yes, and I was careful that my question was what I meant, and didn't flame others for not being able to read my mind.
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