quote:

ORIGINAL: Lashra

No I don't agree with the statement that Mistress made. I don't want to remove my submales manhood, I happen to really like men a lot. What I want to do is have my fun with him and send him flying out into subspace. Part of my fun is taking his ass with a strapon it gives me a feeling of power, power over him, power over his pleasure and power  to use him as I will (within our limits).

~Lashra

quote:

ORIGINAL: hands0n0knees

A more interesting dispute is whether female dominants feel that appropriating the male shape in order to feel sexual power contributes to the diminution of their innate power as women.

But I think that's been asked a thousand times as well.

quote:

ORIGINAL: hands0n0knees

A more interesting dispute is whether female dominants feel that appropriating the male shape in order to feel sexual power contributes to the diminution of their innate power as women.

But I think that's been asked a thousand times as well.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lashra

No I don't agree with the statement that Mistress made. I don't want to remove my submales manhood, I happen to really like men a lot. What I want to do is have my fun with him and send him flying out into subspace. Part of my fun is taking his ass with a strapon it gives me a feeling of power, power over him, power over his pleasure and power  to use him as I will (within our limits).

~Lashra

<Simply applauds>

quote:

ORIGINAL: hands0n0knees

A more interesting dispute is whether female dominants feel that appropriating the male shape in order to feel sexual power contributes to the diminution of their innate power as women.

But I think that's been asked a thousand times as well.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHathor
Nothing can diminish or take away the woman that I am.  Evah---

quote:

ORIGINAL: ocilla

In many ways it takes a fella who is much more mature and secure in his sexuality to get the benefit of such play. 

I agree with this statement.  I recently met a vanilla man and was open and honest about who I am. Amazingly he had no problems with it, initially.  He spent a lot of time asking questions, which I was more than happy to answer. 
 
His thoughts and opinions were typically stereotyped but he began to express a better understanding of the lifestyle.  However, he began to talk about how he would never allow himself as a "man" to be in the position to be dominated by a woman in any manner.  Yet he claimed he wanted him and his woman to be "equal in all things".  I don't know that sounds to you dear readers of this post, but it sounds like an oxymoron to me and/or contradiction.
 
Long story short, it got to the point that he decided he would allow mild play (all for his "research" purposes) (yeah right!),  He convinced me that he really wanted to because I was right about him limiting himself to missionary positioned sex, with him (of course) being on top and he wanted to experience something new.
 
Fast forward to the Day of the planned "experience": 
 
My mantra for the "experience" was "go slowly, go slowly, baby stepping all the way".  I didn't plan on doing anything remotely related to any type of BDSM activities.  This was going to be straight, with me taking lead and he knew that.  It started off well enough but the minute, no make that the second I began to take the lead position he shut down.  He couldn't get past a woman taking lead in a sexual encounter. 
 
Once a counselor always a counselor because after he was able to get it together enough, I wanted to process the "experience" with him.  In a nutshell he said having a woman lead goes against everything he was taught or experienced as a man.  He said he, "felt like a sissy", didn't feel strong (I didn't recall cutting any locks of hair off Samson's hair) and because he never had a woman make love to him before, he "wasn't use to it" therefore he didn't "know how to act" and what he "should do".  I told him to relax and go along for the ride. 
 
He chose not to but then wanted to proceed with him taking lead.  I was so not in the mood after that and therefore nothing happened.  I told him that I thought it best we have a strictly platonic relationship and of course this didn't sit to well with him.  What makes this whole situation more ironic is, he enjoyed what was done (which was very little) but that pleasure put him in an emotional conflict.  He questioned his manhood, sexual beliefs, and other notions he has about being alpha male.  I think it would have been better for him if he didn't get anything out of it at all, rather than feel excitment and then feel bad about himself for feeling good.
 
It's his conflict and his internal battle and I'm letting him own it.  I have to admit I felt sympathy for him, like so many others I've known, because of the insecurities they put themselves through when it comes to their sexuality. 
 
"No I don't agree with the statement that Mistress made. I don't want to remove my submales manhood, I happen to really like men a lot. What I want to do is have my fun with him and send him flying out into subspace. Part of my fun is taking his ass with a strapon it gives me a feeling of power, power over him, power over his pleasure and power  to use him as I will (within our limits)."

~Lashra

I couldn't have said it better Lashra!  If I do use a strapon it's with submales that enjoy it.  It gives me a rush.  I choose not to "break" someone into it if it's a real limit because I don't get anything out of it.  Some would say, "get him to like it, you're the Domme!"  That may be true, but if it isn't floating my boat, I'm not doing it.  For this I want the willing!  You know the saying, choose your battles wisely?  Though he may be willing but not able to take it... getting him able is what I enjoy!  Baby stepping all the way!
 
Faye
 
 

_____________________________

You can put away your masquerade
You won't ever have to be afraid of Me
Open up your eyes and see what is in store
I must the One that you are searching for.

(in reply to ocilla)

quote:

ORIGINAL: hands0n0knees

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHathor
Nothing can diminish or take away the woman that I am.  Evah---

Excepting death, I'm sure that's true: nobody can take away the power of the phallus from you, unless you leave it out in the sun until its plastic melts.

quote:

ORIGINAL: AtlantaMistress

quote:

ORIGINAL: hands0n0knees

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHathor
Nothing can diminish or take away the woman that I am.  Evah---

Excepting death, I'm sure that's true: nobody can take away the power of the phallus from you, unless you leave it out in the sun until its plastic melts.

which is why I have a glass dildo - best for having my subs beg to suck - nothing better than a diswasher safe cock!

As for strap on/anal play - and diminishing the power of being a woman ...a woman has the versatility to add a cock to play, but a man can't add a cunt, now can he?

quote:

ORIGINAL: MisPandora

To argue the opposite, Bitchy Jones had a really fantastic rant on her journal today about femdom and strapons -- http://bitchyjones.wordpress.com -- and how they force a phallocentric sense of power upon a woman when we're powerful WITHOUT the cock.