RE: Your physical appearance

RE: Your physical appearance (Full Version)

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CalifChick -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 7:34:22 PM)
Poke! Fluffy said POKE! That's it! I'd have to poke his eyes out, then he wouldn't see my less-than-lovable body anymore. I mean, he's gotta sleep sometime, right? Just kidding. Sort of. I mean, yes, yes, just kidding. Cali

fluffyswitch -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 7:41:15 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: CalifChick Poke! Fluffy said POKE! That's it! I'd have to poke his eyes out, then he wouldn't see my less-than-lovable body anymore. I mean, he's gotta sleep sometime, right? Just kidding. Sort of. I mean, yes, yes, just kidding. Cali lol, i told Him when we had the 'where we stand' talk that if He hurt me i'd break His knees. He told me that it's not much of a threat since a ten year old could break His knees with all the injuries that He's had...

charmdpetKeira -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 7:41:37 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: breatheasone Say you are in a LTR...and you both love each other. Would it bother you to find out that your partner loved you in spite of your physical appearance? When you thought they liked how you looked? No, but it didn’t do much for me to hear him say, I am the look-a-like of someone who went to prison for having her husband killed. k

slavekal -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 7:44:06 PM)
I always assumed it was in spite of. I look like Frankenstein.

MissMagnolia -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 8:01:09 PM)
Oh you so do not, Kal.

MasterFireMaam -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 8:16:32 PM)
I'm not sure how I'd feel. I think I'd struggle with it for a while. On the one hand, I had thought all along that I was physically attractive to my partner. It'd be a blow to my ego and probably my self esteem to find that I'm not. On the other hand, if it didn't actually change how he or she interacted with me and what not, I'd be happy that they loved me for me, not my body. In the end, I think I'd be ok with it, if my knowing didn't change how he or she treated me. Master Fire

Gwynvyd -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 8:22:19 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MissMagnolia PPPFFTTT Level. I aint sending you no noodie pics then........................................[sm=lol.gif] You can send them all to me Darlin' blows kisses There are some of us who appreciate that sorta thing.. [sm=tongue.gif] chuckles Gwyn

breatheasone -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 8:28:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam I'm not sure how I'd feel. I think I'd struggle with it for a while. On the one hand, I had thought all along that I was physically attractive to my partner. It'd be a blow to my ego and probably my self esteem to find that I'm not. On the other hand, if it didn't actually change how he or she interacted with me and what not, I'd be happy that they loved me for me, not my body. In the end, I think I'd be ok with it, if my knowing didn't change how he or she treated me. Master Fire I understand....and yes, how wonderful it is to have someone that loves you(because they say the words "i love you" every day so it must be true) even though they don't find you physically attractive any more. Sex is practically non existent, but I'm still loved! God....I know how I sound.... maybe this is one thread should have stayed in my head, I sound like a whiny asshole.[:(]

DommeofFantasies -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 8:29:14 PM)
NEWSFLASH!!! Men and Women, in or out of the lifestyle do not have long term relationships with a partner that he or she finds unattractive. Granted, his or her partner may not be what he or she is normally attracted too or may not even be their ideal physical type, but the attraction is there. To tell someone that you loved them in spite of their appearance is just emotionally cruel. If my partner told me that he was in love with me in spite of my appearance, I would pack his bags, make a hotel reservation for him, and wish him well because I deserve better then his sorry, arrogant ass. Life is too short for such pettiness.

MasterFireMaam -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 8:30:52 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: breatheasone God....I know how I sound.... maybe this is one thread should have stayed in my head, I sound like a whiny asshole.[:(] It depends on how important it is to you. Apparently, this is. How other people, including me, react to your question is about their stuff, not yours. Same thing with your partner. In the end, how he reacts, or doesn't, to you physical appearance is about his stuff, not yours. Knowing this is what would probably get me through it if it were me. Master Fire

sexyred1 -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 8:38:38 PM)
You know, the opposite can be just as devastating, believe it or not. To have someone tell you they love you, for many years and to find out it was all based on physical/sexual really sucks.

breatheasone -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 8:42:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam quote: ORIGINAL: breatheasone God....I know how I sound.... maybe this is one thread should have stayed in my head, I sound like a whiny asshole.[:(] It depends on how important it is to you. Apparently, this is. How other people, including me, react to your question is about their stuff, not yours. Same thing with your partner. In the end, how he reacts, or doesn't, to you physical appearance is about his stuff, not yours. Knowing this is what would probably get me through it if it were me. Master Fire I know is shouldn't be important....I really do....but at least now I know why my husband of 24 years and father of my 3 kids doesn't want to have sex any more. What kills me is that it is my fault. I know I gained more weight with the kids then I should have....and I know I STAYED heavy WAY too long....so when I did finally lose weight (80 pounds, no drugs, no surgery, on my own) my skin didn't "forgive" me...and my body looks like a deflated balloon.... I get it.....It just really took the wind out of my sails you know?

MasterFireMaam -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 8:43:17 PM)
Yes, we do. I am not with my girl because I find her physically attractive. We are not sexual partners, so physical attraction isn't a factor. The same thing with my houseboy. I'm absolutely not attracted to him, but I'd welcome him into my family if he ever decided to move (but then, I'd have to find another houseboy to look after the house!). Not all of the relationships represented here are sexually based, thus not all require physical attraction. Master Fire

breatheasone -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 8:43:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: sexyred1 You know, the opposite can be just as devastating, believe it or not. To have someone tell you they love you, for many years and to find out it was all based on physical/sexual really sucks. I agree...that would be just as hurtful....

MasterFireMaam -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 8:44:44 PM)
Yep...and that would actually piss me off...especially when they left me for "the younger model" when I got old. THAT instance WOULD cause a breakup...and FAST. Master Fire

MasterFireMaam -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 8:46:21 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: breatheasone ...my skin didn't "forgive" me...and my body looks like a deflated balloon.... I get it.....It just really took the wind out of my sails you know? Yes, I do know. I DID have surgery and MY skin didn't forgive me...so I understand. The question NOW is, even before you knew this, was the relationship fulfilling enough to stay in? Master Fire

Gwynvyd -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 8:49:42 PM)
I waited to really think on this one.. and I have had something simular... A person very close to me who isnt my normal type but I love dearly and I have been in the on and off stages. It has been hell. His normal type is much slimmer then me, and blonde. His primary fits that mold perfectly.. as does all the other women from previously. They also run on the short side. We love each other deeply.. but do not get to spend very much time together due to the squickyness of his primary. Yeah she knows the full deal about me.. hates my ever living guts. Every time he sees me in person he has to re adjust almost because what he physicaly sees isnt what he sees in his head (or so he has explained) He kinda just looks and stares for a bit.. and then is ok. I know I am not his exact cup of tea... and it bugs me a bit. I know it shouldnt.. and he thinks I am a lovely person.. and beautiful in many ways.. including physicaly in parts. But I know there are things about me that squicked him at first. I am female after all... proud owner of a uterus.. so I can be "a chick" about these things I guess. As far as long term realtionships go~ married or long term couples tend to "settle in" they usualy gain weight.. stop going to the gym.. get busy with work, and the raising of the kids. I am saying They because it happens to men too. But somehow mostly the men get disenchanted and try to trade out for a newer model. I think it points to our "disposable" society... and the whole midlife crisis buy in that to be sucessful as a middle aged male you have to have a young trophy wife. ( yet another thing I bitched about on my blog) Many do not want to work on themselves.. or thier own issues ( usualy of feeling inadequate ) so they dump thier mates with some catch all of I dont find you attractive any more. What a cop out. Cupcake prob. is just as unattractive as his mate.. if not more so.. but thinks of finding fulfillment in greener pastures. If you grow apart.. and one person is evolving.. and the other refuses to grow and stagnates.. and you no longer relate.. fine. But something easily solved by diet and exercise.... or just learning to love them as is... that is just deplorable in my eyes as a cop out for thier own issues. Just my two ducats... keep the change. Gwyn

breatheasone -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 8:51:11 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam quote: ORIGINAL: breatheasone ...my skin didn't "forgive" me...and my body looks like a deflated balloon.... I get it.....It just really took the wind out of my sails you know? Yes, I do know. I DID have surgery and MY skin didn't forgive me...so I understand. The question NOW is, even before you knew this, was the relationship fulfilling enough to stay in? Master Fire Ouch.... well ok then...here it goes....yes and no...was/am I getting everything I NEED no...and I haven't for a LONG time.....was I getting "enough" to stay? yes, yes I WAS

DommeofFantasies -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 8:54:27 PM)
I agree that we have friendships and Domme/slave relationships and attraction is not the issue because it is not a sexual relationship. But, a person cannot have a sexual relationship with someone they do not find attractive. Also, to only love person because they are physically attractive is swallow.

sexyred1 -> RE: Your physical appearance (1/29/2008 8:58:34 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam Yep...and that would actually piss me off...especially when they left me for "the younger model" when I got old. THAT instance WOULD cause a breakup...and FAST. Master Fire It is not even that; it is that no matter how much someone desires you physically, if they do not truly love you wholeheartedly, then it is an empty shell of a relationship even though you seem to be going through the motions. I would not like it if a partner was not attracted to me physically, but I will never be with anyone ever again long term who does not love me from inside out, instead of the outside partly in.

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