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ShaktiSama -> RE: The meaning of a strap on--or not (2/3/2008 8:57:27 AM)
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To me it's a toy, and I seldom strap it to my body because I prefer to control it with my hand--it gives me far greater control of angle, allows me to corkscrew twist as it goes in and out, etc.. The bodily impact of driving the tool with your hips and thighs is very intimate and has its virtues as well, but my body isn't really well-configured for that--it feels uncomfortable and usually hurts my lower back.
The issue isn't just what it means to ME to use that tool, though, in whatever way. The issue is what it means to the man or woman on the receiving end of the penetration. And the subjective emotional experience of being penetrated and surrendering to whatever pleasure, pain and/or humiliation goes with it? Is going to vary from person to person, male and female.
The issue of the strap-on as a symbol of maleness is an interesting one, just from an intellectual point of view. I would definitely say that we live in a male-dominated society and that most of the men we encounter will believe, either fully consciously or subconsciously, that Power is gendered male. Some of them will feel that for a woman to assume Power, she must assume trappings of maleness to express it.
We are not the first society to associate power with gender: if you look at ancient Egyptian portraits of the female pharoah Hatshepsut, she is wearing a false beard--even if she was a woman, she was still officially the "son" of the dominant Egyptian god at the time (I believe it was Amun? Not sure.). So for the Egyptian mindset, Adult + male = power.
Similarly, that fringe of beard that older women sometimes grow after the mid-life hormonal shift was a symbol of mystical power and authority, among the peoples of the Northwest Coast--chieftain masks in British Columbia are depictions of the bearded Goddess Dzonoqua, and men would hold that depiction of Her face over their own before standing to speak in public gatherings. So for the Kwakawakh mindset, Older + female = power.
Similarly, submission and victimization are gendered, in some societies--including our own. I personally veer away from any submissive who self-identifies as a "sissy" for this reason--it's just a turn-off for me when a man associates femininity with powerlessness. Men who use their female identities to empower themselves, or to become beautiful or express some valued part of themselves--I am fine with! Have photographed two very glamorous t-girls and really enjoyed the experience. But a man who feels the need to feminize in order to be victimized is not going to find a sympathetic partner in me.
<----Unrepentent Feminist signing off.
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