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RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 9:03:56 AM

charlotte12

Posts: 471
Joined: 5/9/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop

My mother (in the example I posted above) used humiliation as a tool to correct me for an unacceptable action. Have I spent my life choosing to humiliate others? no. IN fact, if anything, I tend towards nurturing behaviors.
Who knows how this child will process this experience? None of us.
Not every child will keep this as a negative thing for years, not every child will process it and let it go with lesson learned.
*shrug*

Just my .50

Of course. That's why this can be such a tricky topic because there is no one right way to do things. My main concern is that parents create a nurturning environment. If they can do that while including punishment then I'm sure things will turn out fine. I think too many people rely on punishment as their only teaching tool though.

But I just had the thought that this thread might be close to a breach of TOS so I'm going to leave it at that. Interesting thread though.

charlotte

*edited to add.....I've always wanted to say I LOVE your sig line GreedyTop. Just remembered now so thought I'd add that in.

< Message edited by charlotte12 -- 2/8/2008 9:05:41 AM >

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Post #: 21

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 9:13:14 AM

Cyis75

Posts: 164
Joined: 8/31/2004
From: Georgia
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GreedyTop
I would assume that the child's mother DOES know her child.
One time my mom caught me doing something I shouldn't have been (well, more than once, lol, but we'll stick to this incident). On a public street, in center city Philadelphia, she grabbed me by the arm and in front of God and everyone (including the 6-7 friends I had been with) she smacked my ass every other step for the two blocks it took to get home.
Was I morbidly humiliated? HELL YES!!!! Did I ever pull the same stunt? HELL NO!!!!

Problem is now that would garner a visit from CPS or the police tipped off by some "concerned individual"...

(in reply to GreedyTop)

Post #: 22

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 9:29:27 AM

sweetwenchie

Posts: 1993
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Sacramento, California
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Last time my oldest threatened to call the police because my punishment was mean and unfair i offered to dial the phone for her! i have not had to use physical punishment for many years, once they got old enough other forms of punishment were far more effective. Ever see a kid break down and cry because their video games were taken away?

Sure darlin, call the police because your mother "stole" your DS, i would enjoy hearing their reaction to that!

Like Greedy Top my mother had no compunction against smacking my ass in public if it was warranted. i think i only threw a tantrum once or twice while she was shopping. i quickly learned that she would leave the store instantly, take me to the car and deal with me.

i was a quick learner...

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Post #: 23

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 9:31:23 AM

Missokyst

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Kids are horribly spoiled. Hmm.. I wonder who let that happen? As a former retail slave I saw a lot of parents indulging their children, but more who plain out ignored the way they acted. In fact, I saw too many parents that not only accepted their childs bad behavior, they encouraged it as their right.
Check out any toy department sometime. Kids open packages right in front of parents. They take out riding toys, skateboards, ect, and "test" them. And parents smile and look on.
Come on. What is the point of that? To keep them occupied? Do they think that letting the kid ride a skateboard in the store will tell them if it is safe to ride outdoors?
They do it to pacify the child and keep them busy for the moment in the store.

Parents are the reason kids are spoiled.
I could take my kids anywhere and be proud of their civilized behavior.
I never yelled at them, or spanked them. What I did do was make sure they felt safe with me, and that all actions have consequences. It is part of teaching a human to be part of the world.
If you can get your child under control before age 3, everything else is cake.
I would never have humiliated my children to teach them a lesson. But then again, my children were taught right from wrong by example and not the "do as I say not as I do" way I have observed in my retail life.
Kyst

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Post #: 24

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 9:32:43 AM

Cyis75

Posts: 164
Joined: 8/31/2004
From: Georgia
Status: offline

Likewise we didn't dare acting up in public with our mom. She'd grab you by the ear and walk you off smacking your ass every step of the way. You learned real quick not to act up. The one time I got mad and said I was gonna runaway after I'd been punished she grabbed a suitcase and packed up my clothes then set the suitcase and me on the front steps and closed the door to the house. After the shock wore off I knocked on the door and said I'd like to come home...

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Post #: 25

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 9:35:13 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
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thanks, Charlotte! :D

Cyis.. yeah, to me that just shows that the PC brigade has gone beyond the pale. NOT saying I condone child abuse, but there are some kids (and we have ALL seen them) that would benefit by a smack on the ass.

Sweetwenchie! LOL Yeah, take away the digital stuff..lol Although, honestly, sometimes that might not make a dif.. whenI was a kid, my mom took away ALL my toys and books; I have a decent imagination, so I was content to be sentenced to my room because I could entertain myself just fine without the external stuff. But I love the idea of "lemme dial it for ya" LOLOL

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Post #: 26

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 9:35:51 AM

OmegaG

Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cyis75

Likewise we didn't dare acting up in public with our mom. She'd grab you by the ear and walk you off smacking your ass every step of the way. You learned real quick not to act up. The one time I got mad and said I was gonna runaway after I'd been punished she grabbed a suitcase and packed up my clothes then set the suitcase and me on the front steps and closed the door to the house. After the shock wore off I knocked on the door and said I'd like to come home...

heh, and I was the kid that told my mother if she ever kicked me out I'd be gone and she'd never see me again.

I was a tough kid to dicipline, I'm not sure that they ever found anything effective after I was about 10. They would have had to take my books away before they grounded me, but my mother was an english teacher and she'd never do that.

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Post #: 27

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 9:37:53 AM

OmegaG

Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetwenchie

Last time my oldest threatened to call the police because my punishment was mean and unfair i offered to dial the phone for her! i have not had to use physical punishment for many years, once they got old enough other forms of punishment were far more effective. Ever see a kid break down and cry because their video games were taken away? Sure darlin, call the police because your mother "stole" your DS, i would enjoy hearing their reaction to that!

Like Greedy Top my mother had no compunction against smacking my ass in public if it was warranted. i think i only threw a tantrum once or twice while she was shopping. i quickly learned that she would leave the store instantly, take me to the car and deal with me. i was a quick learner...

Isn't that part and parcel of being a parent now. I've done that too. I've told my kids that all I owed them until they turned 18 was food, clothes and shelter and I can define those items after that.

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Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

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Post #: 28

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 9:42:21 AM

Leatherist

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline

It's a great way to punish the one doing it.

People will tend to think the mom is a retard-or whoever.

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Post #: 29

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 9:45:14 AM

OmegaG

Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

It's a great way to punish the one doing it.

People will tend to think the mom is a retard-or whoever.

I think she was looking for her 15 minutes of fame.

_____________________________

Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

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Post #: 30

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 11:03:02 AM

Riff

Posts: 51
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

ritual humiliation of a non-consenting minor - it's just wrong.

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Post #: 31

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 11:32:47 AM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

Punishment for being rude to a teacher is to have him be a truant, and not have him apologize to the teacher? Sorry I don't see the appropriateness in that at all.

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Post #: 32

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 11:37:37 AM

Leatherist

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
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If one wants to instill a life long hatred of oneself with a child-this is exactly how to accomplish it.

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Post #: 33

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 12:15:53 PM

mydestiny2043

Posts: 714
Joined: 10/15/2005
From: Southern California
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It hardly looks like he was shamed...........You know it's hard enough being a parent these days without some people making preposterous assumtions.And I would bet the majority of the ones casting those assumtions are not even parents.What's that old saying?Those that can't teach.

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Post #: 34

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 12:23:07 PM

Leatherist

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Joined: 12/11/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: mydestiny2043

It hardly looks like he was shamed...........You know it's hard enough being a parent these days without some people making preposterous assumtions.And I would bet the majority of the ones casting those assumtions are not even parents.What's that old saying?Those that can't teach.

But we can certainly comment on things like this when we had partents that tried this. It didn't score any brownie points from me with my mother. I'll repeat to those who may think this is a cool way to instruct children.

It's gonna come back years from now and bite you in your stupid asses. They won't be under your control forever.

Try not to forget that.

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Post #: 35

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 12:26:28 PM

TracyTaken

Posts: 615
Joined: 2/1/2008
Status: offline

quote:

It hardly looks like he was shamed..

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,23174957-2,00.html

He looks pretty mortified to me.

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Post #: 36

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 12:47:17 PM

Leatherist

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: TracyTaken

quote:

It hardly looks like he was shamed..

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,23174957-2,00.html

He looks pretty mortified to me.

He looks angry to me.

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Post #: 37

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 12:49:30 PM

OmegaG

Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

quote:

ORIGINAL: TracyTaken

quote:

It hardly looks like he was shamed..

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,23174957-2,00.html

He looks pretty mortified to me.

He looks angry to me.

he seemed scared shitless to me. If he is as timid as he appeared in that video he may never talk in school again and that isn't desireable either.

_____________________________

Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to Leatherist)

Post #: 38

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 1:01:47 PM

Leatherist

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline

Whatever it was, inflicting trauma on people can have long lasting negative effects-especially in formative years. I'm not impressed with this sort of bullying.

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Post #: 39

RE: Nice Punishment Idea - 2/8/2008 1:06:24 PM

AMaster

Posts: 814
Joined: 8/4/2005
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I think it's a little extreme for a young child, but I can see the possibilities in an adult D/s relationship.

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Post #: 40

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