Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady

Page: [1] 2 next > >>

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/16/2008 11:12:59 PM

wankerforuse

Posts: 98
Joined: 7/21/2007
Status: offline

As how can a lady claiming to be a domme from the age of 18 to 25 what experience can they have of life.And what on earth do they know about the fetish scene.Can anyone please enlighten me thanks very much indeed.

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/16/2008 11:17:00 PM

abytchgoddess4u

Posts: 268
Joined: 10/17/2004
Status: offline

Perhaps she was intuitive enough to know herself and her desires at quite a young age? I know I did.

I started experimenting with BDSM at age 19, but I was always a biter/scratcher/wrist holder/instigator/poker/tickler/etc.

_____________________________

"Everything in the Universe Is within you.
Ask all from yourself." Rumi

"The world will know and understand me someday. But if that day does not arrive, it does not greatly matter. I shall have opened the way for other women."
George Sand

(in reply to wankerforuse)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/16/2008 11:19:05 PM

YourhandMyAss

Posts: 5516
Joined: 6/25/2006
From: Sacramento
Status: offline

age not qualifying knowledge has been hashed to death already,

(in reply to abytchgoddess4u)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/16/2008 11:33:22 PM

SweetDommes

Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline

OP - It's that attitude that made us shun multiple groups when we were 23-26ish ... It's a silly, stupid prejudice that way too many people believe. Why is it that a young male Dominant isn't looked down on (in one of the groups that we were in, a 20 year old male Dominant was treated far better than we were

), and young female submissives aren't looked down on (we were told multiple times that we couldn't possibly be dominant, that we needed to try being submissive

), but young female Dominants are told that they dont' know what they really are? Bah

_____________________________

Miss Karen and Miss Holly

Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

Friends are God's apology for relatives

(in reply to YourhandMyAss)

Profile

Post #: 4

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/16/2008 11:42:30 PM

AAkasha

Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: wankerforuse

As how can a lady claiming to be a domme from the age of 18 to 25 what experience can they have of life.And what on earth do they know about the fetish scene.Can anyone please enlighten me thanks very much indeed.

With a nickname like "wankerforuse," I am sure both young and mature femdoms are just lining up to get a chance with you.

Akasha

_____________________________

Akasha's Web - All original Femdom content since 1995
Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

(in reply to wankerforuse)

Profile

Post #: 5

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/16/2008 11:58:42 PM

Foititis

Posts: 66
Joined: 10/31/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: wankerforuse
As how can a lady claiming to be a domme from the age of 18 to 25 what experience can they have of life.And what on earth do they know about the fetish scene.Can anyone please enlighten me thanks very much indeed.

That’s great for you man. Personally I prefer subs around my own age and I'm sure if I was a sub I'd prefer Dom/mes my own age. I dare say being 18-25 is more then old enough to have an understanding of a 'scene' (I don't know if you mean scene as in the physical BDSM community or the concept of it). Wankerforuse, I've been doing this consistently for three years (into my fourth year), does this make me better at it then a 45 year old wife who's only just started Domming her husband? I'd dare say not. Does it make me worse? Not by your standards, since I’ve had more 'experience' then her.

At the end of the day its not about someone having more 'life' experience or 'BDSM' experience. It's about two (or three or four) people sharing an intimate relationship and meeting each others needs.

(in reply to wankerforuse)

Profile

Post #: 6

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/17/2008 12:08:36 AM

MollHackabout

Posts: 38
Joined: 2/16/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: wankerforuse

As how can a lady claiming to be a domme from the age of 18 to 25 what experience can they have of life.And what on earth do they know about the fetish scene.Can anyone please enlighten me thanks very much indeed.

I agree with you. Those 25 and under know NOTHING about being a Domme. It wasn't until my 26th birthday that I received official documents outlining how to be a domme and detailing the intricacies of the fetish scene (all articulated to your standards, of course.) Boy howdy, I sure was a chump for thinking I was a domme before that magical day!

(in reply to wankerforuse)

Profile

Post #: 7

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/17/2008 12:29:56 AM

MadameMarque

Posts: 1128
Joined: 3/19/2005
Status: offline

You can indulge your preference for more mature women, without attacking the validity of younger women. What is the point, besides to be divisive and make some people feel bad?

I realize it’s a popular pastime among some (certainly some here), undermining people’s right to their opinion, feelings, and experience, by chanting “you’re too young, what do you know,” or another favourite tune, “you’re not experienced, so everything you say is worthless.”

Well, what would you have people do? Wait till they’re 50, to live their lives? Deny their own feelings and perceptions because they’re supposedly not old enough to have them or because they are new to the scene? Be submissive when they feel dominant, just because they didn’t get your approval?

Fortunately, many people proceed to live their lives, fairly uninhibited by the opinions of others, are true to their feelings, follow their instincts, and seek out people who respect them as they are.

And another thing. FYI, young women are disrespected every where. It’s positively shocking how much so. So they’ve got enough to deal with without coming to a forum for dominant women to be disrespected.

Thank you.

(in reply to wankerforuse)

Profile

Post #: 8

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/17/2008 5:32:57 AM

MistressFaye1

Posts: 276
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline

OP,

In this day and time 18-25 year olds are exposed to far more than I was at this age. At 18 I didn't know my feelings and behaviors were dominant. Most of the Dommes I know that in my age group 40-50+ recall having certain feelings since they were young but because we did not grow up in a society where sexuality is so open, we questioned our feelings. I for one thought there was something wrong with me to have the thoughts I did. I didn't have many boyfriends because I wasn't the giggling, "write his name all over my notebook" type. There was always a seriousness about me. Nor did I take blind groping of private parts by them in the attempt to "neck" or "do it". Now if I was the one doing the groping and exploring, it was cool.

Today, this age group is more in the know about life than I ever was at this age and I was in the military! We didn't have booty shaking videos, didn't know what "bleeping" inappropriate language was because there were no such things. We didn't see nudity on TV, didn't have cable channels that needed to be blocked from young eyes, didn't have the internet to explore and gasp!!!! learn about BDSM or other topics of interest.

I would love to see you tell my 21 year old daughter that or my 25 year old for that matter (who is not a Domme). Is it really life's experience that make you dominate? Is it knowing the fetish scene that makes one acceptable as a Domme? I know some vanilla folks that know just as much and in some cases more than I do about certain aspects of some fetishes because it's their sexual kink and not mine.

Dominate is a state of mind, being, and it is IN you naturally. It isn't something that you learn. One last point, not all dominate women are into sexual fetishes/kinks. They are strong women that take lead in their relationships (Female Lead Relationships). These women are just as Domme as the Mistress/Domme that live the full spectrum.

Since you feel this age group knows little about life; how about starting a campaign to end selective service and the ability to enlist in the Armed Forces from 17 to 26. What can they know about life's experiences that would make them sign up, go to war, and possibly die for our country? Did you know this is the average age group of this and the Vietman War's casualities?

I would also suggest you stop knocking it until you try it. Since you have a "wanker" for use maybe it could be the learning tool to help a young Domme hone some wonderful CBT skills!

Faye

< Message edited by MistressFaye1 -- 2/17/2008 5:35:43 AM >

_____________________________

You can put away your masquerade
You won't ever have to be afraid of Me
Open up your eyes and see what is in store
I must the One that you are searching for.

(in reply to MadameMarque)

Profile

Post #: 9

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/17/2008 5:51:05 AM

MistressVnus

Posts: 1036
Joined: 1/4/2008
From: Central Florida
Status: offline

quote:

With a nickname like "wankerforuse," I am sure both young and mature femdoms are just lining up to get a chance with you.

Pfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff!! LMAO!!

_____________________________

In the ties that bind,
Mistress Venus
http://www.mistressvenus.com

"I'm not IN the lifestyle. The lifestyle is in Me!"

(in reply to AAkasha)

Profile

Post #: 10

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/17/2008 6:21:53 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: wankerforuse

As how can a lady claiming to be a domme from the age of 18 to 25 what experience can they have of life.And what on earth do they know about the fetish scene.Can anyone please enlighten me thanks very much indeed.

You know, when I read posts like this one, my biggest challenge is to decide...putz, schmuck, or moron?

When I was 25 I was parenting an eight yo, a seven year old, running a business, trying to keep a 28 yo alive, sober and working. I was also parenting my own parents and 5 younger siblings, not to mention the 28 yo's two younger siblings that were always at our house. I had been working for over 10 years. I had met many famous and infamous people that most only see in the news or played in movies. I'd already been wealthy and lived in poverty several times over, watched death, and birth. Known several of the most amazing women I wanted to grow up and be like. Now, while I know my life has been a bit extreme in some areas, compared to many.....I doubt I am the only one that had alot of life before age 30.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to wankerforuse)

Profile

Post #: 11

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/17/2008 6:43:11 AM

LadyHathor

Posts: 775
Joined: 1/2/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: wankerforuse

As how can a lady claiming to be a domme from the age of 18 to 25 what experience can they have of life.And what on earth do they know about the fetish scene.Can anyone please enlighten me thanks very much indeed.

Well let's separate the two statements:

"and what on earth do they know about the fetish scene...:---one can know alot about the "scene" and not be a participant, so I think those two statements don't jive----so knowledge but no action.

I find it rare to believe that someone wiht so little experience in life ( 18-21) could be a Dominant, that is IMHOO, however, there are young people today ( I bet LuckyAlbatross is one), who had their heads on very straight at an early age---however, I think that is more rare than it is common---as far as play, I think it can be, as far as the mental maturity to manage someone elses life, I'm very wary.

_____________________________

Lady Hathor, I am the Mistress Hathor of Orleans, I am what I am, often to the dismay and discomfort of others.

(in reply to wankerforuse)

Profile

Post #: 12

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/17/2008 6:49:28 AM

MsLilac

Posts: 151
Joined: 5/31/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: wankerforuse

As how can a lady claiming to be a domme from the age of 18 to 25 what experience can they have of life.And what on earth do they know about the fetish scene.Can anyone please enlighten me thanks very much indeed.

(highlight added for emphasis)

Well, you’re seemingly defining a Domme by her experience. What about those Dommes that first come to the scene later if life? In their 30’s, 50’s, 60’s and onwards?

_____________________________

I’m sorry, I don’t do autographs

(in reply to wankerforuse)

Profile

Post #: 13

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/17/2008 6:50:15 AM

MsBearlee

Posts: 1032
Joined: 2/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressFaye1

...
In this day and time 18-25 year olds are exposed to far more than I was at this age. At 18 I didn't know my feelings and behaviors were dominant. Most of the Dommes I know that in my age group 40-50+ recall having certain feelings since they were young but because we did not grow up in a society where sexuality is so open, we questioned our feelings. I for one thought there was something wrong with me to have the thoughts I did. I didn't have many boyfriends because I wasn't the giggling, "write his name all over my notebook" type. There was always a seriousness about me. Nor did I take blind groping of private parts by them in the attempt to "neck" or "do it". Now if I was the one doing the groping and exploring, it was cool.
...

Nods, I couldn’t agree more. Hell…I graduated from high school (in a class of about 1000, in the San Francisco Bay Area from a school considered to be pretty darn well ahead of it’s time (by the number of pregnant teens). And yet even there, in my day and age, most girls were expected to get married fairly soon out of high school. I’m guessing at least half the women who went to college actually stated they went to find a husband!

We were raised in a world that included ‘The Cleavers’ (the Beaver’s folks) and ‘Father Knows Best’. These shows, popular in the 50’ and 60s taught women that women are subservient to men. Hell, it was even hard for women to get the education needed to get jobs of authority: doctor, lawyer, etc.

As a teenager, if a boy and I retreated to my room to visit, we had to leave the door open; so I wouldn’t get pregnant. (Hell, I remember keeping this custom when male friends came to visit my husband and I, and he wasn’t home; front door stayed open!). When playing ping-pong with neighborhood pals, my mother made comments to me like ‘Let the boys win sometimes’. The whole idea was women were there for the pleasure of the men (thinks of seek’s rape-thread…ugg), and it was our job to let them know we thought them holier-than-thou (even if we had to fake it).

While I’ve always been pretty comfortable with my sexuality…oral and anal sex, watersports, wrestling, cross-dressing a bit and so on…It wasn’t until I discovered BDSM (about five years ago), that I realized the fact that I so enjoyed some of these things was because I was being ‘toppy’ when I experienced them. Of course, at first I was too busy keeping the guy ‘the stronger one’…so I thought a real, feminine woman (like myself) could only be submissive! I actually thought if I played to win, or told someone we’d be doing things my way, or was the fucker rather than the fuckee, I would be seen as masculine and bullish at the very least and certainly unattractive at best.

So, it’s taken me awhile to realize I am a strong and confident woman who enjoys being toppy with men…and that many people find that appealing. To the point that my spending 3 years in a cabin in the woods…off grid, miles from anybody (sans telephone, etc), learning to put chains and a blade on my truck, plow myself out, haul water when I had to, insist bears stay OUT of the cabin, chop wood, use a chainsaw, pee outside when the pipes froze, change a tire in the dark…yadda yadda yadda…is somehow awesome ONLY because I’m a woman and was up there alone.

I agree with Faye, people today see, hear and are taught things differently than even just 50-60 years ago. Our world is going faster, information is easier to get, and witnessing people doing things differently than what you see in your home is easy. IE: people grow up faster and have more choices. Not to mention the stereotypes are slowly falling away.

Embrace it baby!
MsB

_____________________________

A must read for submissives! (click here)

This one, as well!

(in reply to wankerforuse)

Profile

Post #: 14

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/17/2008 6:56:22 AM

ItalianSMistress

Posts: 427
Joined: 1/19/2007
From: Niagara Region Ontario Canada
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

quote:

ORIGINAL: wankerforuse

As how can a lady claiming to be a domme from the age of 18 to 25 what experience can they have of life.And what on earth do they know about the fetish scene.Can anyone please enlighten me thanks very much indeed.

With a nickname like "wankerforuse," I am sure both young and mature femdoms are just lining up to get a chance with you.

Akasha

Hahahahahaaha, good one AAkasha

Anyway, to answer the OP, I started at 18, and trained that first slave for four years. By then end of that experience I would say I was a fairly seasoned Domme. Was that fact that I was around 21 change that? Or does it have more to do with the four years I spent experimenting and learning? As I have said many times before, it does not have as much to do with your age as it does with your experience level. Seriously, if you were going to do some edge play, would you trust someone that was 21 but had been doing it 3 years, or someone 41 who has only done it once before or not at all?

_____________________________

Governess

"Dominance is the ability to create a hunger in someone that's so strong they will do anything, anytime, anywhere just to please you."

http://italianmistress.livejournal.com/

(in reply to AAkasha)

Profile

Post #: 15

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/17/2008 7:00:48 AM

DianeB269

Posts: 1596
Joined: 10/30/2006
Status: offline

Fast reply.....

It has nothing to do with your age. Either you have it or you don't.
At the age of 17 I realized I was very dominant. The guys I went out with realized it too. From day one I'd take control of every part of the relationship.

Diane

< Message edited by DianeB269 -- 2/17/2008 7:27:57 AM >

(in reply to MsBearlee)

Profile

Post #: 16

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/17/2008 7:09:46 AM

LadyEllen

Posts: 10931
Joined: 6/30/2006
From: Stourport-England
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: wankerforuse

As how can a lady claiming to be a domme from the age of 18 to 25 what experience can they have of life.And what on earth do they know about the fetish scene.Can anyone please enlighten me thanks very much indeed.

So, we have this one, and we have two threads in Random Stupidity - one about how we should grow old gracefully and not waste money on anti-wrinkle cream, and another about how whats on the inside is so much more important than whats on the outside.

It would seem then that the reason someone just upped and left without a word (other than "I need to move my car") and no word of an explanation afterwards, after five minutes of meeting in a Felixstowe hotel last year, is because I'm far too young looking and far too glamorous, and I have an awful personality. Clearly, no other factors could have been influential.

I'm surprised some people can afford to be so fussy.

E

_____________________________

In a test against the leading brand, 9 out of 10 participants couldnt tell the difference. Dumbasses.

(in reply to wankerforuse)

Profile

Post #: 17

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/17/2008 7:28:44 AM

aidan

Posts: 904
Joined: 5/28/2005
Status: offline

This line of thinking rubs me the wrong way, for the same reason that the logic of "young submissive men shouldn't be involved in BDSM because (insert reason here)" is a bunch of hogwash.

The fact is, at 18 we're legal adult citizens (in the United States, at least), and have the right sexual experience and exploration with other adults. Even before that, humans are defining and exploring their sexuality. Nobody comes into BDSM, or anything in life, with full knowledge from the start like Athena burst from Zeus' skull. You've got to start somewhere. If you know who you are and what you want, why not start now?

< Message edited by aidan -- 2/17/2008 7:29:22 AM >

_____________________________

Do what now?

"I aim to misbehave."
-Mal Reynolds

(in reply to LadyEllen)

Profile

Post #: 18

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/17/2008 7:34:06 AM

RedMagic1

Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha
With a nickname like "wankerforuse," I am sure both young and mature femdoms are just lining up to get a chance with you.

Quite a few people lined up when he started his "Satanism in BDSM" thread.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to AAkasha)

Profile

Post #: 19

RE: Personally i prefer a mature dominant lady - 2/17/2008 8:21:56 AM

slavekal

Posts: 1486
Joined: 7/20/2004
Status: offline

I think it's all relative. I have known some very young dominas who were quite intuitive and talented. Some ladies in their forties are still trying to figure it all out.

(in reply to wankerforuse)

Profile

Post #: 20