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Credibility - 2/22/2008 7:59:22 AM   
LadyHathor


Posts: 775
Joined: 1/2/2008
Status: offline 		I think this question applies to real life activities where you meet people like us or online--do you place credibility in someone who does not have a "partner"--i.e, a Dom or Domina who espouses the life--but for some reason does not have a submissive?
 

 
 

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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:02:12 AM   
colouredin


Posts: 4279
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline 		Not everyone has a partner all the time do they, it depends on the person I guess, there are a lot of whisperings and gossips about people that i know from the scene and i know a fair few Doms but i also know ex subs of theirs so i guess it depends on that. There is one specifically I know who hasnt had a sub as long as i have known him and no one else can recolect one either, and he is seen as a preditor picking off newbies and stuff but as thats only one instance i cant really say anything general

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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:04:18 AM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		Absolutely.
I'd trust someone who takes their time, and waits for the right one over those who jump into whatever just to say they have someone.

~Christina

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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:05:13 AM   
camille65


Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHathor

I think this question applies to real life activities where you meet people like us or online--do you place credibility in someone who does not have a "partner"--i.e, a Dom or Domina who espouses the life--but for some reason does not have a submissive?
 
 Well sure I do. Just as I consider anyone without a partner/s-type/d-type to be credible. Why wouldn't I?Some folks love being single or unattached, some are looking still. Some are fresh out of a relationship.Maybe I'm not understanding the question?

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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:13:14 AM   
SailingBum


Posts: 3225
Joined: 12/10/2007
From: Sailin the stormy sea
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHathor

I think this question applies to real life activities where you meet people like us or online--do you place credibility in someone who does not have a "partner"--i.e, a Dom or Domina who espouses the life--but for some reason does not have a submissive?
 



I/m tring to figure out what this has to do with the price of tea in china.

BadOne

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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:14:49 AM   
TracyTaken


Posts: 615
Joined: 2/1/2008
Status: offline
quote:

I think this question applies to real life activities where you meet people like us or online--do you place credibility in someone who does not have a "partner"--i.e, a Dom or Domina who espouses the life--but for some reason does not have a submissive?


If people did not see singles as being credible, no one would ever get together in a one-on-one relationship.  Poly would be the only way to go.

Online ... there is no telling what is what with people.  I tend to put more stock in those who seem to have real life experience over those who do not.

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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:15:29 AM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		Although there are times when I ask questions directed specifically to people who have had a rt 24/7 relationship as opposed to just reading about it.
They don't have to be *in* that type of relationship, just have *had* one.
Because people who haven't (in my experience) tend to have rather grandiose ideas of servitude, and, yanno, cages and chains get uncomfortable after a while...

~Christina

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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:20:29 AM   
LadyHathor


Posts: 775
Joined: 1/2/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHathor

I think this question applies to real life activities where you meet people like us or online--do you place credibility in someone who does not have a "partner"--i.e, a Dom or Domina who espouses the life--but for some reason does not have a submissive?
 
 Well sure I do. Just as I consider anyone without a partner/s-type/d-type to be credible. Why wouldn't I?Some folks love being single or unattached, some are looking still. Some are fresh out of a relationship.Maybe I'm not understanding the question?


You definitely have a grasp of the question, in the world out there, we think nothing of single people, but within the WIITWD, do we tend to be harsher on someone who espouses, speaks to, provides thoughts, ideas etc, participates that is single? Do we not wonder more why? Do we question more how they could offer any insight when they are alone?


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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:23:48 AM   
camille65


Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
Status: offline 		I don't know in general, I guess a lot of the time I don't seperate people unless I'm actively doing something in the BDSM world. So people are just pretty much people to me lol.

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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:25:22 AM   
SubbieOnWheels


Posts: 590
Joined: 12/14/2007
Status: offline 		OK, I am alone, but I have 57 years of experience in life. That has to count for something. of course, the remarks I make and the advice I give are usually not slanted toward the D/s dynamic, but more towards general life lessons.

If we discount someone's thoughts and words simply on the basis of their partnership status (or lack thereof), we may be missing out on something profound.

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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:27:25 AM   
sweetwenchie


Posts: 1993
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Sacramento, California
Status: offline 		Why would i find a single person any less credible than someone who is not?  Their relationship status has nothing to do with them as a person, or their thoughts on how they live their life.  There are quite a few single people i respect and admire for who they are, and if they had a partner i would have felt the same.  Their actions and words speak far more loudly than their relationship status.

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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:30:20 AM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline 		I don't wonder why someone is alone.
Sometimes from their posts it's pretty obvious.
There are times in your life you are meant to be alone.
It's best to do that then to try to force a relationship. Only BAD things happen when you do this. I know.
No, I don't think most of us here judge others just because they don't happen to have a current relationship.
Now, if you've been sitting in your mom's basement all these years, posting your fantasies, well....then I might begin to wonder.

~Christina

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~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:31:22 AM   
camille65


Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
Status: offline 		But blushes... it is such a NICE basement! I even have casement windows...

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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:35:48 AM   
MsIncontrol


Posts: 261
Joined: 10/3/2007
Status: offline 		I don't think I question ones credibility with partnering.  However, I do see people who's credibility is doubtful and usually they are NOT alone.  It seems to me those lacking ethics tend to be able to easily manipulate people into their lairs.

On the hand, there are some people, with or without credibility that will always be alone.  Either by choice or their lacking skills as a human.

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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:48:14 AM   
xxblushesxx


Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

But blushes... it is such a NICE basement! I even have casement windows...


But do you have a disco ball and a black light?

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~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com


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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:51:28 AM   
KatyLied


Posts: 13029
Joined: 2/24/2005
From: Pennsylvania
Status: offline 		~fr~
Most people who are single have had past experience and they may also be having current experience, in a play situation or less serious relationship.  I don't think what they say has less value than those who are in a serious relationship.  Actually some people in relationships make me take pause when I read some of their nonsense.


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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:52:21 AM   
Kana


Posts: 6676
Joined: 10/24/2006
Status: offline 		Why wouldn't I?

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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 8:52:45 AM   
Skully7000


Posts: 377
Joined: 7/22/2007
Status: offline 		isn't just an kinkified twist on an age old vanilla situation.

if I go out to the clubs alot but my girlfriend never comes with me eventually some people would start to doubt wether or not I actually had a girlfriend.

I feel like this is the same idea... if you never see a Dom dominate in all the time you know them...eventually you start to question how good of a Dom are they really...if they were that good wouldn't they do at least a scene here or there...

I was in a situation like that for awhile. I was often playing and having fun with Lifestylers at Paddles and TES and a few private parties. but when I was hanging out with some of my Fetishist friends...I got the feeling that they didn't really understand how far I went into Top space.(because most of the time i'm a very lade back chill guy) then one day at an afterparty I had the pleasure of Toping a friends long distance submissive who was in town for the weekend. we clicked right away and i through him into such a deep subspace that only elevated my top space... I could seriously see that I blew away there whole entire concept of ME as a person. Now Granted I didn't mention that it was one of the most intense scenes I had and that it went over better then I could have imagined...but thats not the point.

The point is: while I don't think not playing/or being single will discredit you...the opposite can go along way in proving yourself
Cheers
Skully

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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 9:03:50 AM   
MsBearlee


Posts: 1032
Joined: 2/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHathor

... in the world out there, we think nothing of single people, but within the WIITWD, do we tend to be harsher on someone who espouses, speaks to, provides thoughts, ideas etc, participates that is single? ...   


Hmmmmmmmmmm... I do not, but then of course, I'm single.  LOL   Still, I never had that perception, single or not...nor felt it from others.  Besides, these sites are 'dating sites'...there is a high percentage of singles here; I can't imagine people feeling that way.
 
B

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This one, as well!

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RE: Credibility - 2/22/2008 9:15:11 AM   
azropedntied


Posts: 1829
Joined: 7/25/2005
From: Phx AZ
Status: offline 		If the person has a partner or not  does not factor in to the credibility  scale or gauge in my book .Its not if they have one or  a whole  tribe of people behind him/her , It matters not if they he she  has nobody or somebody or a  whole stable of people . Its  the actions and deeds and how they live and treat others .If its an educator its how they teach , if its a chief its how the meal is prepared and  does it taste good , did i get sick . Why would i care if the teacher is single or the cook has no partner in his/her life .Dammit now i am hungry ..

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