quote:

ORIGINAL: HerLord

Ok.
This is going to be messy. But let me try.
I know that ther are absolutely NO absolutes. But, what if you were to really try to write a book of rules for the life. What in your mind would be most important, least important, and the notso important "must haves?"
I see lots of posts in here on various topics that generally come down to what are the rules of; being a sub/slave, dominating, etc.
Let's say that between us on CM, we have been charged with writing a rule book. BTW Noah... I think it should be 2 nudies for every toy, and 1 "money" as profile, lol
Any way, so as to give a thread dedicated to the one twue rule book, I took it upon myself to begin a thread on this topic. I did a VERY quick search on this and found everything to be disorganized. So I stopped looking.
I would love to see real answers, sarcasm welcome, but I would like to see what everyones individual idea is on their own version of rules, and maybe as a "community" come to some sort of consensus as to what they could be, if generalized enough to "fit the mold." I expect the rules are different for each person, so I will be taking the time to look at each one and see what of each one could be gleaned and reformatted to within/out context be applicable to the whole. I would love to see, as a continually evolutionary input, a listing continually edited on OP a list of What It Is That We Do handbook... lol I know I have not perfectly expressed my self here, so any ?'s feel free.

quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum



HUH no where in you first post did you say you were not serious.  perhaps once you saw the direction of the post you were like " i was only kidding"   but at that point it was to late for you to back out.  Seriously  dude you take this/yourself  way to serious.

BadOne

quote:

ORIGINAL: HerLord

quote:

ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub

It seems to me that most problems stem from 3 rules already mentioned that crop up frequently..Communication (seems to be a good credo, however many seem to have the most difficulty with that!)..Honesty (seems to be hard due to the fact that many times in our days we tend to be less than honest to have our life go more smoothly ie:Yes boss, I am working on that as we speak, or...no problem, it's ok I did not like that vase anyway, when your best friends son knocks it over..things like this..)and face it..then you have those with hidden agendas, Dom and submissive alike..and as LA said being true to yourself,some seem to think if they behave or act in certain ways, that it will attain them that which is being sought, and hence not being true to who they are, and then the incompatabilities set in when the facade cannot be kept up..(refer to honesty again)..So I guess I can simply add, Respect for each other and their contribution to the dynamic...Tempting

Being true to yourself, in my book, falls under the catagory of honesty. It is no less imperative to be honest to owns own self that to others. Being HONEST, starts with honesty to yourself. If you can not be honest to yourself, there is NO WAY to be honest to those around you.

I was going to let that slide... but being as it is SO VERY VERY important, I deemed it fruitfull to clarify.

quote:

ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub

Maybe you should look a wee bit past the blue highlights that you placed and you will see what else I also wrote..it is enclosed in parenthesis...so clarify away, just make sure actual clarification is needed...in this case,it was not..Tempting

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

The main downfall of "the d/s lifestyle" is this man.

People have this idiotic notion that they can just whip out a silly book with some trite agreements, and everything is going to be "happily ever after."

Three main things work in a relationship.

Honest transparency.

Honest self realization, ditch the rosy glasses.

A willingness to cooperate and work out the bugs-rather than trying to prevent irrelevant bugs with a 'screen".

The bugs are always going to sneak in there,and you need to be fast on your feet to deal with them-not sitting on a freaking throne, wondering why your ass is being eaten alive.

quote:

ORIGINAL: HerLord

quote:

ORIGINAL: SailingBum



HUH no where in you first post did you say you were not serious.  perhaps once you saw the direction of the post you were like " i was only kidding"   but at that point it was to late for you to back out.  Seriously  dude you take this/yourself  way to serious.

BadOne

[snip...]
For the n00bs who have not the experience, or wit, you have, may not know where to begin thier exploration, or how. The "book" I am going to finish with will be no more than a few KEY elements to focus on, honesty and communication and the like. So for a big part of it, yes your right. This IS a stab at the notion of there being rules that govern WIITWD, but it is also advice I believe that n00bs should hear, and adhere to.
[...snip...]

quote:

ORIGINAL: brainiacsub

A book of 'Rules'? Rules implies truisms. I swear, if we have one more thread or debate about 'true this', 'true that'.....argghhh....I'm running away to join the Goreans, cause they don't fuck around with the truth.

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ORIGINAL: marieToo

My only rule is to rule out doms who look like they have cum dripping off their mustaches.

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ORIGINAL: BitaTruble

quote:

ORIGINAL: brainiacsub

A book of 'Rules'? Rules implies truisms. I swear, if we have one more thread or debate about 'true this', 'true that'.....argghhh....I'm running away to join the Goreans, cause they don't fuck around with the truth.

Of course they do. Goreans are still a group of humans and individuals within that group are just as likely to lie as any other individual within a group of humans.

Celeste

quote:

I thought this was going to be a fun one, but it has turned nasty, so here is rule #1, Sit down shut up and read the rules so the self  proclaimed ones with all the experience don't have to read and answer your dumbass questions. Rule #2, If you are a noob or a boob don't ask a question, don't have fun, just sit down, be real quiet and tell youself to be real honest about how f--king quiet you to are yourself.
How in the hell can you all take the original post so seriously? Did you read the whole post before you got all worked up? Why don't you call it the book of law and make everyone "OBEY". Would that make you happy? My sub, my rules. But the book of rules sounded fun, kinda like "The Idiots Guide to the Universe"

1. Life is too short to go to bed angry or to not say goodbye, I love you. (having lost a child to murder, I know this one to be very true)
   
2. Life is too short to work at something you hate. Find what you love to do and make it your career.
   
3. Laugh. It may not be funny now but one day it will be. Perspective changes with time.
   
4. Love with all your heart, Committ to life fully. Trust in your self. Follow the beat of your Drummer.
   
5. To thine own self be true. Stay honest with yourself and you will find few reasons to be dishonest with others.
   
6. It takes great effort to remember a lie and to whom you told it, it takes none to remember the truth. Tell the truth and shame the devil.

quote:

ORIGINAL: HerLord

For the n00bs who have not the experience, or wit, you have, may not know where to begin thier exploration, or how. The "book" I am going to finish with will be no more than a few KEY elements to focus on, honesty and communication and the like. So for a big part of it, yes your right. This IS a stab at the notion of there being rules that govern WIITWD, but it is also advice I believe that n00bs should hear, and adhere to.

Not all of us think only of our own position as a reference point for what we can offer to assist others.

(slams and flaming anticipated)
Peace

quote:

ORIGINAL: HerLord


The fact that safewords have as yet been unmentioned is of concern to me. There are many things that you, the experienced do not tend to think of as being "rules" for you have been doing them so long they are second nature, unthought of dynamics no longer needed to be conveyed.