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To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 12:30:27 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

I know this is a topic that's come around before, but I've found it a bit funny Myself the past couple of days.

I'm currently in the process of putting on a new main pic to My profile. As most of you know, this takes a couple of days and removes the last main pic from showing up on your posts on the boards.

The funny thing about this is, I haven't had even one single email come through My box that was in any way something distasteful. Don't get Me wrong. I'm not complaining about that one bit. Though now I'm left wondering if I might be better off not posting a pic at all.

Any thoughts from anyone on this? What are your comments on the advantages or disadvantages of not posting a pic?

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

Post #: 1

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 12:55:36 PM

xxblushesxx

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

Back when I was looking, I had *far* less distasteful emails than most of the other subs on the boards I had spoken with.
That was because (I think) that I made it quite clear, (both when I had a pic and when I didn't) that any communication would be on a respectful level, or they needed to move on.
I think it's more how you hold yourself, and the standards to which you hold others, rather than the pic you use.
UNLESS the pic you use is distasteful.
But I'm quite sure yours would not be.
Otoh, I found it interesting to get to know people who had never seen me, nor I them, and to see if an attraction would develop.

~Christina

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 2

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 1:05:42 PM

Jeffff

Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline

For various reasons. I don't have a pic on my profile.If some one asks I'll send them one. Since I don't troll the other side I don't see the need.I would be interested to know if anyone from the boards emails you foolishly, or is it all form the other side.

Jeff

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 3

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 1:19:55 PM

LadyRainfire

Posts: 6040
Joined: 2/20/2008
Status: offline

I have a pic up, admittedly a crappy one. I'm thinking of changing it though. I'm tempted to see if I can use my absolute worst picture and see if I still get responses. *grin* I also specify that I'm not here looking for anyone other than friends, though that hasn't stopped some. On the other hand, I've met some great people and who knows where it will lead from there. One of the nicest so far is someone who doesn't even have much of a profile up but just a nice, pleasant introduction. I think the pic question all depends on you and why you are here. I haven't had any problems either but I wouldn't be surprised if I did at some point. It's inevitable. If I was actively seeking someone, I would definitely want a picture up because being a 5'9" redheaded Amazon, I know my appearance is not something that appeals to everyone.

_____________________________

"Desire is an insatiable beast. Sample your strongest dreams, and you will only crave more." ~ Master

~ one half of "L&L"~

My current state of mind

(in reply to Jeffff)

Post #: 4

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 2:02:50 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

Consider yourself asked, because now I'm curious.

My mail usually comes down to two categories. The folks who write to Me from the boards, which I really tend to enjoy, and those that I'm sure come from the other side. I don't recognize the name, from the email it's easy to see their not familiar with the things I've said, or even noticed that My sig line is pretty clear. (Believe it or not, that last one stopped a lot of nonsense that hit my mailbox.)

I'd tend to say that at least 98% of the mail that comes from the boards is usually a treat. It's corny, but I love that stuff. I got so many wishes of congratulations when I put things up about collaring My sub, and other things of that nature. Most recently, I was really delighted when people sent Me messages on the other side about doing My first branding. I've had fantastic email exchanges with people from the boards. I never want anyone to think that I have the slightest complaints about those because they are great.

The reason I tend to tolerate the other part that comes with the pic being put up is that I want people to see the real physical form that I come with. I don't want them thinking that I'm more attractive than I really am, weigh less than I do, or have any other misconceptions about My outward appearance. I don't want there to be an illusion. When I meet people rt, I want them to know what to expect.

Thanks for the discussion, Jeffff, and also to the other participants.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

For various reasons. I don't have a pic on my profile.If some one asks I'll send them one. Since I don't troll the other side I don't see the need.I would be interested to know if anyone from the boards emails you foolishly, or is it all form the other side.

Jeff

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Jeffff)

Post #: 5

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 2:03:53 PM

darchChylde

Posts: 5279
Joined: 9/28/2006
From: Warm Springs, GA but i live in San Francisco.
Status: offline

i was property for months before i joined this site, so i have never looked for anything other than friends here. Most of my emails are respectful complements on my pics, profile and posts (listed in descending order of frequency). Yes, i have had some djstasteful emails; but those are relatively few (maybe once a week or so, lately); but it seems to have reduced since i stopped using a pic of myself topless as my main pic (which i don't get, since i can't see why anyone would be attracted to my scrawny and ill-defined chest).

i've always used pics online; mainly because even if i'm not particularly happy about my appearance, i know that many do find me attractive and i love to hear it. To me, it's also very nice to put a face with a name.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyRainfire

being a 5'9" redheaded Amazon

Sorry for this mini-hijack, but i can't help but wonder something. While 5'9" is tall for a woman, it's still right at a man's average height; exactly what is the minimal height for a woman to be considered an Amazon? In my mind it would have to be at around 6 feet, at least; basically, far outside of the normal range for a woman's height.

_____________________________

I'm the man your mother warned you about...
if only to keep me to herself.

I'm a male dominant switch whose experienced as a poly sub to a dominant woman
.
Where the fuck do I post?

Proud Owner and Protector of chyldeschylde.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 6

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 2:39:34 PM

Politesub53

Posts: 14862
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline

i have had some nice comments about my coffee drinking photo. i agree with Christina though, its fun making friends with people without seing a photo.

(in reply to darchChylde)

Post #: 7

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 2:49:34 PM

sweetwenchie

Posts: 1993
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Sacramento, California
Status: offline

i personally like seeing pictures of the people whose words i have been reading if possible.

On my profile i have a few different pictures so people who see me around here can put a face to the wench.

Having a few different ones can show that i am not actually some guy living in my mother's basement pretending to be something i am not. i am very open about who and what i am.

The emails i receive that i find most enjoyable are the ones that comment on something is said in my profile, if it is a one liner about my picture... forget it.

_____________________________

"To make oneself an object, to make oneself passive, is a very different thing from being a passive object." - De Beauvoir

"You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist." - Nietzsche

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 8

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 2:58:53 PM

Sweet1Maybe4U

Posts: 144
Joined: 8/1/2006
Status: offline

I enjoy reading all the threads I can and I just LUV putting the names with the faces..but I do realize not everyone can do that.
As far as mail goes, now that Ive been collared my mail is alot less but very respectful, mostly 'good wishes' kind of stuff..which is always replied to in a nice manner. Occassionally I get the stuff like "show me your boobs"

Like yeh, Im gonna do that...
Before my collaring my mail was excessive and had just about all you could think of~nasty, nice, gross...all kinds..but things have settled now..

_____________________________

It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.
Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)

(in reply to sweetwenchie)

Post #: 9

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 3:02:40 PM

Skully7000

Posts: 377
Joined: 7/22/2007
Status: offline

that brings forth a question I have been thinking of:

Ladies do you give better preference to males who add a photo to there email. I have only recently started doing that and noticed a much better response rate. I am not sure if its b/c I'm not a creepy old guy...or if its just because a pic with a photo doesn't get lost in the fold so easily...

as far as having a pic: I think its important. (i'm also a nice guy who trys to be idealistic) I look at a photo and the info in the profile and the interests and base my decision on as much info as possible. while looks are only a minor faction they do play a role. so I don't hide that(especially when it comes to men I am interested in) but its not just physical looks its style, dress, grooming ect. the stuff that goes beyond a basic photo of what you look like and moves closer towards "who you are"

(in reply to sweetwenchie)

Post #: 10

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 3:04:03 PM

Sweet1Maybe4U

Posts: 144
Joined: 8/1/2006
Status: offline

oh also:
*goes to perv the pics on everyone's page..

Hey!...Dang! Sweetwenchie!....i LOVE the music!...woo hoo!
*does a wiggle and turns around..

_____________________________

It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.
Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)

(in reply to Sweet1Maybe4U)

Post #: 11

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 3:06:14 PM

sweetwenchie

Posts: 1993
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Sacramento, California
Status: offline

Thank you! Still stuck on the music of my wild youth.

_____________________________

"To make oneself an object, to make oneself passive, is a very different thing from being a passive object." - De Beauvoir

"You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist." - Nietzsche

(in reply to Sweet1Maybe4U)

Post #: 12

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 3:11:16 PM

Sweet1Maybe4U

Posts: 144
Joined: 8/1/2006
Status: offline

well...Ive been told Im an Amazon. I stand 5'11 without heels..Ive had quite a few comments in person and online about it not being "normal" for a girl to be this tall...that God made a mistake...or that Im a freak for being tall..*shrugs...but Ive been this tall since I was 10 years old..Others have said I look like a model...*rolls eyes....Im just me!

Im also very glad that my Dom is very secure in His Manhood. He says it doesnt bother Him in the least if I wear my 2-3 inch heels.

_____________________________

It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.
Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)

(in reply to darchChylde)

Post #: 13

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 3:13:48 PM

Sweet1Maybe4U

Posts: 144
Joined: 8/1/2006
Status: offline

well I just LOVE the stuff...and am playing it now!
I hope its alright that Ive added you to my favorites..

_____________________________

It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.
Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)

(in reply to sweetwenchie)

Post #: 14

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 3:17:15 PM

LadyHathor

Posts: 775
Joined: 1/2/2008
Status: offline

I think if there is not a pic and one gets a response, then they took the time to read the profile. I find I get emails, they haven't read the profile, but they perved the pic.

_____________________________

Lady Hathor, I am the Mistress Hathor of Orleans, I am what I am, often to the dismay and discomfort of others.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 15

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 3:19:30 PM

sweetwenchie

Posts: 1993
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Sacramento, California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Sweet1Maybe4U

well I just LOVE the stuff...and am playing it now!
I hope its alright that Ive added you to my favorites..

add away!

i tend to add and rearrange the music every couple of months, or when i am bored! lmao

_____________________________

"To make oneself an object, to make oneself passive, is a very different thing from being a passive object." - De Beauvoir

"You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way, it does not exist." - Nietzsche

(in reply to Sweet1Maybe4U)

Post #: 16

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 3:19:51 PM

MissHarlet

Posts: 2728
Joined: 9/11/2005
From: El Paso , TX US
Status: offline

I get told that Im an amazon also .. and Im only 5'10" in bare feet and often wear 5" heels .. and because of this most men are shorter than I am ..... as this has been a fact since I was a preteen it doesnt bother me ... but it does make me smile when a man tells me he is very tall and then tells me he is 6'

I have a picture on my profile only because I want people to know I am an older Dominant and have no surprizes when they meet me ...I would rather see delight in their eyes when we meet than disappointment .. I ask for pictures from those I talk to for a while online .. only because I like to have a face to put with the words I read .. but do not ever choose a friend or sub by thier looks.... in fact Im more apt to not choose someone by thier voice than their looks .... lol some voices just irritate me .. not fair but its how it is

_____________________________

Protectress of hearts/souls of all submissives calling Bounty's Place home, by order of Bounty~Proprietor

To be respected you must be respectful, to be loved you must be willing to love,
to be trusted you must be willing to trust.

(in reply to Sweet1Maybe4U)

Post #: 17

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 3:28:30 PM

LadyRainfire

Posts: 6040
Joined: 2/20/2008
Status: offline

Yep, Sweet1, same here. I've been tall since I was 10 years old. I've also been called names because of it. Right now, I don't care anymore if someone doesn't like my height, its not something I can change. However, I can change if I talk with them. *wink*

Skully, while I won't say that I favour anyone with a picture in their profile, it would help me if I was actively seeking. Only because I was burned badly on another site and honesty is a near-fetish issue with me now. But I think it also shows an openess. Just my two cents.

_____________________________

"Desire is an insatiable beast. Sample your strongest dreams, and you will only crave more." ~ Master

~ one half of "L&L"~

My current state of mind

(in reply to Sweet1Maybe4U)

Post #: 18

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 3:32:12 PM

LadyRainfire

Posts: 6040
Joined: 2/20/2008
Status: offline

Oooooo, I'm the shorty here..... I love it!!! Sorry, LadyPact, didn't mean to hijack the thread!

I'll go back to singing along with Sweet Transvestite now with sweetwenchie...

_____________________________

"Desire is an insatiable beast. Sample your strongest dreams, and you will only crave more." ~ Master

~ one half of "L&L"~

My current state of mind

(in reply to LadyRainfire)

Post #: 19

RE: To pic or not to pic - 2/25/2008 3:35:30 PM

Sweet1Maybe4U

Posts: 144
Joined: 8/1/2006
Status: offline

Well, my Sir Shagmeister is 6'1". I think the actual average height for men is around 5'9 or so..so 6 feet can be tall. Ive dated men of all height. But alot of men are intimidated by tall women.
I understand about the voice thing...I had a fella want to date me but I couldnt get past the harsh scraping of his voice..And He was from waaaay up North and was very different from my voice. Im a Southern girl with alot of slang...LOL....so, He would say..."what?" alot to me..so, I just didnt think it would work out. Does that make me shallow?
Anyway, Sir TED is a southern boy with honey in His voice...

and I just melt..I didnt actually see His picture until we had chatted online a few months. Later, we met in person and it was just wonderful!
Since I was serious about finding someone (I had in the past made bad choices based on just the physical

) I wanted to give the blind test a chance and was glad I did. It makes me wonder how many wonderful Men I had passed up by not following thru with gut instinct about their letters to me..Youth is wasted on the young and stupid.
But it all worked out. I dont think I could find anyone more suitable for me than my Sir.

_____________________________

It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.
Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)

(in reply to MissHarlet)

Post #: 20

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