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Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 5:30:09 PM

DominaJayde

Posts: 110
Joined: 12/28/2007
From: Tasmania, Australia
Status: offline

That's probably not the best title for the topic, but I can't really think of another way to put it.

Background, I have been chatting for quite a while to two male doms, sending messages back and forth, usually just about various methods of sub training, amusing anecdotes, you know the sort of thing you do with a work colleague about shared issues, nothing too deep or meaningful, a little banter, etc etc.

Then out of nowhere, both of them suddenly admitted that they had long held submissive tendencies and wanted nothing more than to submit to me, at first I thought it was just a ploy to get wank fodder, I am very descriptive when I explain how a scene goes with my boys, but after talking to them both some more I get the feeling that it is not just a passing whim for mastubatory purposes.

My issue is that *I* seem to be the one who is having the problem getting over the fact that both of them identify as Dominant, there is a large disconnect going on here, and it's making what was once a very pleasant and interesting shared discourse into something stilted and uncomfortable on occasions.

Theoretically I should have NO problem dominating either of them, if they are as I think they are, genuine, but theory and practice don't want to join up right now.

DJ

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letting go is a freedom in itself
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Post #: 1

RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 6:09:42 PM

LadyHathor

Posts: 775
Joined: 1/2/2008
Status: offline

happens all the time, there is a contingent of men that I say will secure or procure---

secure=i am a sub take me Mistress

procure=I am a Dominant kneel bitch

I will pose as one or the other and acquiesce as the situation dictates.

its category number 2, hiding what they want for fear that the boss is looking and will shame them, or thinking we are spineless creatures--who really need a man to straighten us out--

puhleez.

< Message edited by LadyHathor -- 2/26/2008 6:12:46 PM >

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RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 6:26:28 PM

NefertariReborn

Posts: 381
Status: offline

I personally think it's hot. Doms have all those alpha tendencies that I find irresistably sexy. Now, on the other hand, if those tendencies start creeping into My turf over time, that's a problem. If the submission is totally reflexive, and it's not a "Crush Me, into being a sub" thing, wrap either one up, or both if that's your slant, and enjoy the ride.

(in reply to DominaJayde)

Post #: 3

RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 6:38:40 PM

TheBanshee

Posts: 403
Joined: 7/19/2007
Status: offline

It's the misrepresentation I think that troubles you. If they are a dom, fine. If they are a switch I think they feel they'll lose some mojo to potential submissives. Nothing wrong for them to have a sub side - but for crying out loud, own it!

(in reply to NefertariReborn)

Post #: 4

RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 6:54:19 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

Or (and this is me attempting to be positive) maybe they are just hot for you and don't know how to express it another way.

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RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 6:59:17 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
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From: Island Of Misfit Toys
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And, everyone has the potential to want to try the other side at one time or another. Yes, I absolutely agree with Lady Hathor's secure/procure description---can I borrow it?---but if I genuinely like a top who is interested in bottoming (and I am deliberately making the distinction between bottoming and submission) then I am willing to pursue it further, without automatically assuming an ulterior motive.

Plus, think of the secret laughs you can have whenever he does the domly dom routine!

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RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 6:59:51 PM

MissHarlet

Posts: 2728
Joined: 9/11/2005
From: El Paso , TX US
Status: offline

I have had the same thing happen over the years .. and it is always uncomfortable for me ... If it is in the context of I want to experience what a sub feels ... I can handle that .. but I dont understand not owning they want to switch .. if that is truly where their head space is ...

I have topped some of them and it is rarely a good thing for me......just me .... but not something I enjoy as a rule ....

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Post #: 7

RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 7:00:20 PM

Jeffff

Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
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What wrong with. " I think your hot. I wanna fuck you"?.........to subtle?

Jeffwey

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Post #: 8

RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 7:01:35 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

Well that response MIGHT work on some of us.

However, we tend to get some variation of that one quite a bit.....

Actually.... a hookup I had last fall said he would love to spend time with me as long as there was no pain involved! Was he implying that I have some kind of one track mind, I wonder.....

< Message edited by LadyHibiscus -- 2/26/2008 7:10:42 PM >

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Post #: 9

RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 7:16:14 PM

DominaJayde

Posts: 110
Joined: 12/28/2007
From: Tasmania, Australia
Status: offline

I never thought of it like that, thats an interesting slant, thank you.

DJ

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letting go is a freedom in itself
http://fetishfandango.blogspot.com/

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Post #: 10

RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 7:19:00 PM

DominaJayde

Posts: 110
Joined: 12/28/2007
From: Tasmania, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: NefertariReborn

I personally think it's hot. Doms have all those alpha tendencies that I find irresistably sexy. Now, on the other hand, if those tendencies start creeping into My turf over time, that's a problem. If the submission is totally reflexive, and it's not a "Crush Me, into being a sub" thing, wrap either one up, or both if that's your slant, and enjoy the ride.

I will admit I am sorely tempted, very sorely tempted, on a certain level I do find it very sexy, but I would worry that their dominant tendencies might come out, and that would spoil it, for me anyway. I shall have to think about it some more.

DJ

_____________________________

letting go is a freedom in itself
http://fetishfandango.blogspot.com/

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Post #: 11

RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 7:19:02 PM

Jeffff

Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
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Ladies..... while I really try to avoid sweeping generlizations........most men, dom . sub. nilla.....are do me's
take this information and use it wisely!

Jeff

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Post #: 12

RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 7:19:58 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
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From: Island Of Misfit Toys
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So, what's your point, sweetie?

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Post #: 13

RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 7:20:46 PM

DominaJayde

Posts: 110
Joined: 12/28/2007
From: Tasmania, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Jeffff

Ladies..... while I really try to avoid sweeping generlizations........most men, dom . sub. nilla.....are do me's
take this information and use it wisely!

Jeff

Should you really be letting us know 'secret mens business' like that *grin*

DJ

_____________________________

letting go is a freedom in itself
http://fetishfandango.blogspot.com/

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Post #: 14

RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 7:23:15 PM

Jeffff

Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
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I trust you will keep it to yourselves..:)

Jeff
(who would never sub....but might let you think so in order to get you in bed)

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Post #: 15

RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 7:24:34 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

<insert unseemly snort of laughter>

The submissive stuff comes FIRST....but then you wouldn't know that, would you? heh

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Post #: 16

RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 7:28:48 PM

Jeffff

Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
Status: offline

Hard limit?...............RED!!?...............lol

Jeff

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Post #: 17

RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 7:30:28 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

One person's CBT is another person's dick massage.........just sayin'.....

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Post #: 18

RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 7:37:34 PM

Jeffff

Posts: 12600
Joined: 7/7/2007
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LOLOLOL............nice effort...........really......... I appreciate the offer.........but thank you.......no..:)

Jeff

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Post #: 19

RE: Male Doms who suddenly display their 'sub' side - 2/26/2008 7:38:32 PM

LadyHibiscus

Posts: 27124
Joined: 8/15/2005
From: Island Of Misfit Toys
Status: offline

Oh sure, you say that NOW.

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