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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/7/2008 11:31:34 AM

domahpet

Posts: 1505
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From: Santa Rosa
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welcome back GT!!!!!!!!!
we missed ya's!!!!!!!

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*Love is giving someone the power to break your heart, but trusting them not to*

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/7/2008 11:35:36 AM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
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I missed you all, too!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/7/2008 12:43:25 PM

Lumus

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*huggles GT*

[without molesting her, even!]

[ok, maybe a little molesting...]

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/9/2008 5:47:13 PM

Lumus

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[by request; notes he was the last one to post]

Dear Cali,

Which 1-2 hole-punch combo do you think works best when trying to make a gal cum so hard her eyes cross permanently?

1. Mouth to pussy [duh].
2. Pussy to mouth [you only taste the ones you love].
3. Mouth to ass [because too much lube can just make a mess].
4. Ass to mouth [bow chicka bow bow...].
5. Pussy to ass [whoops, I slipped].
6. Ass to pussy [hey, if they say it's tighter, don't complain].

and finally, the most overlooked:

7. All three holes [in a hygenic order, and if you last over three hours you may find yourself dangerously close to the top of the list of lurves, though still under chocolate...].

Sincerely,
The Wanderer

[Welllll, I'm the type-a guy that likes to poke around;
your mouth n ass are good but I'm a-fuckin your tight mound;
I'll love ya and I'll beat ya, cuz to me it's all the same...
I'll even let-ya swallow, while I call ya filthy names
cuz I'm the Wanderer...
yes, the Wanderer...
I like to pound
and pound
and pound
and pound...]

_____________________________

<Talk to educate; listen to learn.>

~ the other half of "L&L" ~

I have been dubbed the Rainmaker. Do not make me take your water for my tribe.

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/9/2008 5:48:18 PM

GreedyTop

Posts: 52100
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From: Savannah, GA
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lumus

*huggles GT*

[without molesting her, even!]

[ok, maybe a little molesting...]

WOOHOO!!!!

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polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/9/2008 10:42:56 PM

CalifChick

Posts: 10717
Joined: 10/28/2007
From: California
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Lumus
Which 1-2 hole-punch combo do you think works best when trying to make a gal cum so hard her eyes cross permanently?

1. Mouth to pussy [duh].
2. Pussy to mouth [you only taste the ones you love].
3. Mouth to ass [because too much lube can just make a mess].
4. Ass to mouth [bow chicka bow bow...].
5. Pussy to ass [whoops, I slipped].
6. Ass to pussy [hey, if they say it's tighter, don't complain].
7. All three holes [in a hygenic order, and if you last over three hours you may find yourself dangerously close to the top of the list of lurves, though still under chocolate...].

Okie dokie then. I think the following would be effective (did you eat your Wheaties today??): 1, 1, 1, 3, 3, 1, 1, 3 oh yes 3, 3, 4, 2, 2, 2, 3, 4, 5, 5, 5, no don't stop now, 3, 3, 3, oh fuck yesssssss 33333333333333333333, NOW 555555555555555555555555.

Whew.

I'm sorry... what was the question again?

Cali

_____________________________

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/11/2008 11:31:02 AM

Sundowner

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Joined: 3/11/2007
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Dear Cali

I have a distinctly shitty cold. It appears that, through the wonders of sympathetic resonance, you have one too. What should we do about this?

(and btw - do colds limit the attraction of giving or receiving blowjobs? Is such a concept possible?)

Sniffy

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/11/2008 11:46:06 AM

CalifChick

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From: California
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Sundowner
I have a distinctly shitty cold. It appears that, through the wonders of sympathetic resonance, you have one too. What should we do about this? (and btw - do colds limit the attraction of giving or receiving blowjobs? Is such a concept possible?)

Dear Sniffy: Well one of us should take a first class plane ride (to be uber comfy, after all) to see the other so we can snuggle together and perhaps our combined body heat of oh, roughly the temperature of the surface of the sun, will burn it out of us.

And sadly, blowjobs are quite difficult when you cannot breathe thru your nose. Not impossible, mind you, but difficult. Hence the "burn out" phase should come before the "blow out" phase.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/11/2008 12:46:15 PM

DDraigeuraid

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cali, I do like your solution to whatever ails us. Simple, direct, and it works.
Now start swimming
Dragon

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/11/2008 1:01:18 PM

Lumus

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quote:

ORIGINAL: CalifChick

Whew. I'm sorry... what was the question again?

Cali

I forget. You'll have to remind me by doing that with me all over again.

_____________________________

<Talk to educate; listen to learn.>

~ the other half of "L&L" ~

I have been dubbed the Rainmaker. Do not make me take your water for my tribe.

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/11/2008 1:11:19 PM

CalifChick

Posts: 10717
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From: California
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DDraigeuraid
cali, I do like your solution to whatever ails us. Simple, direct, and it works.
Now start swimming
Dragon

Dear Big and Scaly:

Ahem. You missed the part about "first class plane ticket". And the fine print about who is hosting (hosting=forking out the cash).

The devil is in the details.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/11/2008 1:17:05 PM

tsatske

Posts: 2037
Joined: 3/9/2007
From: Louisville, KY
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quote:

Edited to say... yes, chicks like flowers after blowjobs. lol.

But we like chocolate before blowjobs. I always tell everyone - men = blowjobs, women = chocolate.
Master has banned me from chocolate. Does this mean no blowjobs for Him?

(becuase I have tried to ban him from blowjobs on several prevouis occasions, and always found my mouth full before i could finish the sentence. mrrrph)

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/11/2008 1:19:23 PM

CalifChick

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From: California
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quote:

ORIGINAL: tsatske
becuase I have tried to ban him from blowjobs on several prevouis occasions, and always found my mouth full before i could finish the sentence. mrrrph

Bwahhhh hah hah hah hah hah hah. Ahem. Oh my, were you serious? You were trying to ban him from blowjobs? Turn in your girly card, you should be ashamed. Now drop and give him another one.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/11/2008 1:22:34 PM

purepleasure

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Joined: 4/9/2004
From: Lehigh Valley, PA
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Dear Cali

I'm bored at work and NOBODY else is here. What should I do?

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/11/2008 1:23:39 PM

CalifChick

Posts: 10717
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From: California
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quote:

ORIGINAL: purepleasure

I'm bored at work and NOBODY else is here. What should I do?

Take off your clothes and dance naked around the desk. Karma will then cause someone to come in. You know the drill after that, drop to your knees...

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/11/2008 1:25:41 PM

faerytattoodgirl

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dear cali...do you think that if i offer my chocolate bars as tribute to a pro...i could get an hour session per chocolate bar??? some women are addicted to chocolate you know....

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/11/2008 1:26:56 PM

faerytattoodgirl

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dear cali...will me new updated profile video attract me a hot Mistress?? or just horny men???

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I did not reply to your cmail.

I am flawed.

Imperfect.

MUST SPANK!!!

SPAAAAAAAANK!!!

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/11/2008 1:28:21 PM

CalifChick

Posts: 10717
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From: California
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quote:

ORIGINAL: faerytattoodgirl

dear cali...do you think that if i offer my chocolate bars as tribute to a pro...i could get an hour session per chocolate bar??? some women are addicted to chocolate you know....

I'm thinking the value of one chocolate bar vs. the value of one hour of a pro's time... hmm, I dunno, is that even close to equal?

Maybe you should put out a trail of chocolate pieces and see who follows them to your door.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/11/2008 1:29:21 PM

CalifChick

Posts: 10717
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From: California
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quote:

ORIGINAL: faerytattoodgirl
dear cali...will me new updated profile video attract me a hot Mistress?? or just horny men???

With that tongue, it's going to be horny men all the way. But hey, have them send you chocolate.

Cali

_____________________________

AKA "The Undisputed Goddess of Sarcasm", "Big Bad Cali" and "Yum Bum". Advisor to the Subbie Mafia, founding member of the W.A.C. and the Judgmental Bitches Brigade, member of the Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's and Team Troll

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RE: DEAR CALI - 4/11/2008 1:54:53 PM

hejira92

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From: Palm Beach County, Fl
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Dear Cali,

I have a gig tonight and I really don't feel like singing. Master is not here, so I can't give Him a blowjob. Oh, woe is me!!!!

What should I do???

signed,
I need more than music in my mouth

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