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WidowSpiders -> RE: Using Diapers in Bondage/Humiliation (10/31/2008 9:05:50 AM)
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It really all comes down to a difference of views of what is attractive and desirable in a submissive. Every Domme is different, and thank goodness we are.
Everyone is somewhere on the spectrum of the BDSM cube of interests. Some like humiliation, others are more into sadism, and others still are more into bondage. There's nothing wrong with having different interests. That's why there's a hard limit list. It would be lovely for those of you who are interested in extreme humiliation if there were a plethora of Dommes all clamoring to make you shit yourselves, but sadly, there are at least 400 subs to 1 Domme, and most of those Dommes are professionals, not lifestyle. It must be quite tempting to try to convince those who do not share your passion to engage in it, which you just did.
There are so many different kinds of subs and slaves out there. From what this post appears to be saying is that those with diaper fetishes see the perfect submissive as someone who is bonded through humiliation and a base psychological conditioning stemming from the association that a naughty child has for its mother.
To the two of us, a perfect slave is one who naturally serves, one who does not need to be humiliated or degraded to feel devotion. We desire beautiful and graceful artists, those who have a deep sense of empathy and intuition. Gardeners, poets, dancers, singers, sculptors, homemakers... artists. It is merely our personal interest to find people who naturally seek a nurturing and guiding hand. We seek happy and internally beautiful people. This is not a game to us, nor do we feel particular dominant if we need to make someone shit in an adult diaper to feel devotion towards us.
We do not like humiliation play, period. If it humiliates a slave to go outside with his shirt off, we would not allow him to do it, even if he gets a kick out of humiliation. Diapering is merely an extreme form of humiliation. It is not the diapering itself that is solely repulsive. It is humiliation in general. If a person feels degraded by a request we give, we find it insulting and do not allow it. People who serve us must wish to do so because they are drawn to doing it, because it gives them a sense of pride, not humiliation.
If someone needs to be forced to shit himself to feel submissive to us, we do not feel that we have found a good match. To us, submissiveness is an orientation, an attitude, not a conditioned Freudian response to being degraded. Submission, to us, is not degrading, it is a beautiful and giving personality. It is a kind and loving devotion. It is not something to be ashamed of. The association between a child shitting in a diaper and being dependent upon his mother to wipe his ass is not attractive to us. It does not signify submission. Rather, it signifies dependence, which is an involuntary and helpless frame of mind.
We do not condemn the practice of diapering, nor would we discourage those who enjoy it. If there are Dommes out there who enjoy humiliating their subs and the psychological bonding that comes with it, then good for them! It does no good and shows marked disrespect to try to convince others to pander to your fetishes. If a sub/slave's duty is to serve, the last thing s/he should do is to convince a Domme to bow to his kinks and fetishes, especially if it is unattractive and unnatural to them.
This post was wondering how taboo it was to use diapers. It is not taboo, at least to us. It is simply another aspect of entertainment, albeit extreme.
It is, however, something that the two of us, and the four other Domme friends we share a community with, find unnecessary.
Find a Domme who enjoys it. Do not waste any time trying to convince those of us who do not find it arousing or empowering to engage in it.
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