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ORIGINAL: iwearpanties

hello All 

ive read all of the post here and i guess im the only one ?  but i hope im not  one of the Mistress ' es i met for the frist time told me where too meet and what to wear so she could see i have followed orders she had given and to be able too spot me out in a public place where  we met .   How ever she did tell me i d better be wearing ladies panties under my male clothes she gave me a type or panty and color it took me a few stores too find that but i had no trouble doing this for her kinda made me feel she was interested  more or just wanting too see if i would realy do as instructed?  and i did do as she told me she was very plaes too see i found my panties and she made sure the lacey wasit band on  then she colud see while we chatted

Personally, I think that what she did inappropriate.  In my view, she was domming you and having a public scene with you.  At that point you were not her submissive and she was not your Mistress.  Based on your brief description, if that's more of what she wanted, you should have met at a public dungeon as opposed to possibly involving non-consenting bystanders in your scene.  Having her suggest to what you wear externally in order to help her recognize you would be acceptable to me if not too specific.  At the same time, if it was someplace you weren't familiar with, you could have asked her what was appropriate to wear and then decided for yourself and told her what you'd be wearing to help her spot you. 

At this point in a relationship, IMO, a test of this sort isn't appropriate.  To me, that comes later.  I'm confident there are some who would disagree.  Those women are also the ones who likely wouldn't interest me to begin with as to me that's not what a first meet is about.

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ORIGINAL: Ostentatious:

I wouldn't meet someone who called it an interview.  I may not even want the job after meeting her.  Meeting as friends, with no pressure is much better and imo Ds relationships that work work because there's a friendship in place.  Making it Ds from the start doesn't allow that to happen.

I agree totally!  To me, what you inititally described is "putting the cart before the horse!"  One doesn't enter into a D/s dynamic until they know the other.  Once they do, the dynamic slowly develops on it's own as each party eases into it.  I've been on my own too long to have someone walk into my life and immediately take total control of it (e.g. "I'm not a doormat" LOL!).  It would have to be a gradual thing for me as we got to know each other better and my submission to her grew.  That was the case with my last Mistress who was wise enough to understand that.

As Bill Murray constantly repeated in one of his movies where he played a character with OCD, "Baby Steps". 

Just my two cents on the subject...  Okay, I'll admit it was at least a nickel's worth!

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ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I've mentioned this on other posts.  I'll try to make it sound like it's something fresh.

I generally don't do first meets at dinner.  I don't drink coffee, so that's out.  I usually arrange to meet people for the first time at an event I'm already planning to attend.  The only dinner would be if that would happen to be at a munch, if that was the most convenient.

I also happen to come with My own security.  My husband attends every first meet I'm involved in.  Should I encounter the question, I simply state that it will be discussed, and I will let them know of My decision.  In general, before actually meeting, the person has already been informed that there will be no play on a first meet, though depending on the venue, they might be invited to watch Me play with someone, so they can see My style.  I'm also happy to introduce them to others who know Me, should they want a reference of sorts.

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ORIGINAL: pixelslave

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ORIGINAL: DianeB269

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ORIGINAL: LadyHathor

No, this is not a Lady Hathor expose---
 
However, I am interested in perspectives--one of the things that irritates Me, is when in chatting with a boy and an agreement that we will meet for an interview--his question is invariably--what will happen. My response is standard:
 
We will meet for lunch or dinner, chat, share thoughts and see  if we connect---here is where I get peeved a tad--
 
' yes Mistress, I expect that to happen, but what will happen next?'
 
I am reluctant to give more than vague details as in that initial meeting I could decide, nothing more will happen---as I share with them--we moght not get any further than this---however, when pressed for the next meeting--how do some of you respond or what responses have some of you gotten from your Dominants?
 
 

LOL...Nothing ever happens on/at the first meeting....

Diane

You'd be surprised Diane.  I've been suddenly grabbed by the hair and kissed passionately when saying "goodby"! 
 
For me, that was "something happening" that I did not expect at all!  It was also a very pleasant surprise that was mutually enjoyed.

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ORIGINAL: LadyHathor

I adore putting things out there for you all---you do keep Me sane--or at least thinking I am sane--

one clarification---I never play or do anymore than anything vanilla on the first meeting, these questions seem to assume and leap ahead that thet first meeting willl be successful and we will then proceed to the good stuff--


oy