RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you?

RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (Full Version)

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colouredin -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 9:36:40 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark Yeah, I don't think it as shallow either, but you often see people advocating personal responsibility. Yeah - that will be me - I do it all the time. Fact is that I still need someone to tell me I am beautiful and I'm not embarressed to admit I want and indeed need that to function in a healthy way. the.dark. without vearing off topic too badly, yesterday girlie was making all these excuses as to why she needed a hug from Sir, cos this happened or this happene whatever, and I said to her, sometimes you need a hug because you need a hug thats it, there doesnt have to be a deep rooted reason for it you just do, sometimes you need to be told something nice, thats not a bad thing, and if you have to fish for it it shows you dont get it enough, sometimes its seen as wrong that we want/need these things to function but bugger me a world where you never have a nice thing said to you, never have a hug or a kiss for no reason, sounds like a pretty empty world to me

LaTigresse -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 9:41:56 AM)
It really is true. As much as some of us.......not naming names.......would like to they they are so uber cool self sufficient and don't really neeeeed anyone..... We all need some sort of external validation. How we get that will vary dramatically from one person to another. We won't believe we are loved if we do not get some sort of communication that we are. We won't believe we are a valuable employee without getting some sort of feedback, even if that feedback is simply continuing to get paid on pay day. We have to have something that shows us we are what we believe we are for it to matter to us.

RCdc -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 9:51:17 AM)
External validation is a big thing - because if you are validated, you feel important and if you feel important you feel beautiful. That is why I am big on the whole ignore button feature here. I don't do iggy, everything someone writes to me, I see and if I can acknowledge it I will. It is important to everyone that they know their words aren't falling on deaf ears - even the negative ones or ones I don't agree with. I don't buy into the whole 'I don't care' ethos. If it wasn't important, and you didnt care what people thought then people wouldn't post. Messageboards, blogs, emails are all forms of leaving you mark. By placing someone on iggy you are making the words invalid and in turn that makes the person invisable - if they are invisable, there is no beauty to be seen. And I truely believe that every single person has the tiniest amount of beauty that can be captured, even if it is for a tiny second. yikes - that sounds all hearts and flowers. the.dark.

cjan -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 9:54:53 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: kittinSol quote: ORIGINAL: cjan Wtf ? Stimulation junky? Fear of death ? No, I don't fear death, it's nature. What's to fear ? We don't all share the same fears; indeed, it would take a truly wise one to have none at all. Consider, if you like, that fear is like a diamond one holds in one's hand ( ok, I'm channeling Yoda again ). We can look at it, examine it closely, experinece it fully, and, finally see through it. Ok, Idon't want to jack this thread. I can be a chatterbox, but I enjoy y'alls points of view. Gotta go to work now. Chop wood, carry water.

masterfixer -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 11:46:39 AM)
death is just another venue of what happens as we grow old.

LaTigresse -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 12:53:19 PM)
Yes, but some people are terrified of it none the less.

lusciouslips19 -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 1:01:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark That is why corsets rock. They are sexy and hold me in! I loathe my 'mummytummy' - but it is there and there is nothing I can do about it. Some people get them, some don't. Tight tops look so unflattering, even though I feel my boobage rocks and I do not have to wear huge unflattering bras to lift and seperate. - but I do wear sexy bras and like the slut I am, love to show them off. And seriously - trying to get a good shot with boobs in the way coz ya cannot get close isn't funny. But even though I feel like that, I just couldn't go under the knife. Darcy wouldn't want me to, and I know he thinks I am beautiful and I think I am blessed in that sense. My beauty is important to me, but I can say that because I have someone who reaffirms and supports me. Not everyone has that and as shallow as it may sound, most people want that. the.dark. We are so hard on ourselves, arent we? I was really self conscious with my Sir the first time about my "mummytummy", stretch marks and overhang from c-section. I probably shouldnt have because well hes got a belly of his own. he said the nicest thing. He said he figured, I earned it! Sure its important to get validation of our beauty sometimes. I do think its more important that we see ourselves as beautiful and desirable and sexy. maybe because of the changes I have made in appearance knowing I look better today at 45 then I did at 35, but as we age, we become even more beautiful and sexy and confident. Ask any MILF chaser. I can assure you. There are tons of them out there!

FRSguy -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 1:02:40 PM)
Foe me I prefer all the flaws in people. It makes them ... well them. I think the barbie porn dolls you see in photography get so common that what a lot of people strive to look like or compare themselves to is something thats rather static. When whatshername from Baywatch first bounced around it was for a lot very hot looking then a large percentage of woman went out and got them and then it was oh look she got P... set. It just not the same when people all look alike. As far as why I think its because in everyone there is a measure of self worth based on wether or not we feel needed and acceptable to others.... How much of the whole that measure is I think is to blame.

lusciouslips19 -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 1:05:48 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark I truely believe that every single person has the tiniest amount of beauty that can be captured, even if it is for a tiny second. yikes - that sounds all hearts and flowers. the.dark. dark,dark, are you ok? I think someone slipped ya something![:D]

lusciouslips19 -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 1:09:22 PM)
“Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams.” Ashley Smith

RCdc -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 1:18:43 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19 dark,dark, are you ok? I think someone slipped ya something![:D] I think it's all the cold I have... someones spiked my honey and lemon.[;)] the.dark.

lusciouslips19 -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 1:38:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Darcyandthedark quote: ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19 dark,dark, are you ok? I think someone slipped ya something![:D] I think it's all the cold I have... someones spiked my honey and lemon.[;)] the.dark. Yea, it's got nothing to do with the topic of beauty. Or the fact that some give us validation and make us see our own beauty. Nothin to do with unconditional love either. or that deep down you're an ole softie. Yep, it must be the cold![:D]

LadyHibiscus -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 1:39:32 PM)
Being born with a facial defect, and having parents that could pass for Italian movie stars, obsession with my appearance sucked up a lot of my early life. Thank you, charming peer group, for making my childhood Even More Fun! I think that's why I missed a lot of the adolescent phases! Now I am looking ahead to needing more plastic surgery in another ten years or so to counteract gravity on the side of my face that is falling... think it will be really cheap by then? Or will wimples be in style, and it will all be okay? I miss being young, healthier, and fitter. Oh well! As for aging, my family is extraordinarily well-preserved. I have clients around my age, and theirs, that make me wonder just what the HELL they have been up to....but I think it's just the luck of my genetic heritage as much as anything. I try to make myself presentable, but I will always see a freak looking back at me in the mirror, so I am not going nuts. Plus, when I was growing up the no-makeup look was in --- and its opposite, disco makeup and Farrah hair --- so those endless preening habits never got ingrained. I am clean and tidy, and sometimes I wear some of the makeup I own. (I collect cosmetics...then don't use them....) Love my jewelry. Dress well, and age-appropriately. If the package is not acceptable to others, wellll...there are days when I am not so happy with it myself, but HEY! Here it is boys and girls!

Bound2One -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 1:55:02 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LaTigresse I agree with you. While it may sound as though I hate plastic surgery, I don't. I know it is quite valuable to many. I also believe we should have the freedom to alter our bodies as we see fit. I think more than bashing the surgery, I question what drives so many to do it, especially to the extremes. The extremes are what bother me also, LT. For example, the other day Madonna was in the news b/c of the 'hall of fame' stuff. God, you could bounce a quarter off her face it's so taut. Any actress of a certain age is starting to look like she's 25 not 45 or older. And all the magazines and gossip wags go on and on about how fabulous they look. Puhlease! I rarely find perfection beautiful. I like little quirks, lilttle imperfections - those things that make us human.

lusciouslips19 -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 1:57:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus Being born with a facial defect, and having parents that could pass for Italian movie stars, obsession with my appearance sucked up a lot of my early life. Thank you, charming peer group, for making my childhood Even More Fun! I think that's why I missed a lot of the adolescent phases! Now I am looking ahead to needing more plastic surgery in another ten years or so to counteract gravity on the side of my face that is falling... think it will be really cheap by then? Or will wimples be in style, and it will all be okay? I miss being young, healthier, and fitter. Oh well! As for aging, my family is extraordinarily well-preserved. I have clients around my age, and theirs, that make me wonder just what the HELL they have been up to....but I think it's just the luck of my genetic heritage as much as anything. I try to make myself presentable, but I will always see a freak looking back at me in the mirror, so I am not going nuts. Plus, when I was growing up the no-makeup look was in --- and its opposite, disco makeup and Farrah hair --- so those endless preening habits never got ingrained. I am clean and tidy, and sometimes I wear some of the makeup I own. (I collect cosmetics...then don't use them....) Love my jewelry. Dress well, and age-appropriately. If the package is not acceptable to others, wellll...there are days when I am not so happy with it myself, but HEY! Here it is boys and girls! The great thing about these forums. I dont have a picture of you. However from knowing you through your posts, you beauty is crystal clear to me. Anyone who cant see that is blind.[sm=kiss.gif]

Vendaval -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 2:29:28 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LaTigresse I agree with you. While it may sound as though I hate plastic surgery, I don't. I know it is quite valuable to many. I also believe we should have the freedom to alter our bodies as we see fit. My own opinion on plastic surgery is pretty conversative. If there is something like a masectomy, accident or birth defect then it can be a real blessing. I do have a problem with cutting into perfectly healthy and functioning bodies for the sake of an idealized doll or android, especially if the patient has not fully developed into an adult. I think more than bashing the surgery, I question what drives so many to do it, especially to the extremes. That is what bothers me more than the surgery in and of itself. And I do think that fear of our own mortality is a major motive.

Vendaval -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 2:41:01 PM)
Ah...the gender differences. Get a bunch of guys drinking and talking about their war stories and various skateboarding, bike, surfing, etc. injuries and pretty soon they are taking off their clothes to compare their scars. (Look! Mine is bigger/better nastier than yours!) Such a warrior mentality! But so many women hide their scars from pregnancy, C-sections and the like. One of the most beautiful women I ever saw was a lady in her 50's or so who was changing in the women's locker room at a gym. She had a masectomy scar and one breast removed. She also needed a walker for mobility. She stood before the mirror, completely naked. She told me how happy she was to have survived the cancer and how determined she was to regain her health and live her life. That lady has real beauty! quote: ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19 We are so hard on ourselves, arent we? I was really self conscious with my Sir the first time about my "mummytummy", stretch marks and overhang from c-section. I probably shouldnt have because well hes got a belly of his own. he said the nicest thing. He said he figured, I earned it!

cjan -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 5:54:38 PM)
quote: Ah...the gender differences. Get a bunch of guys drinking and talking about their war stories and various skateboarding, bike, surfing, etc. injuries and pretty soon they are taking off their clothes to compare their scars. (Look! Mine is bigger/better nastier than yours!) Such a warrior mentality! I agree. I think it was Gloria Steinem (though I'm not sure) who said that if men menstruated they (we) would brag about how strong their flow was, how potent their phereomes are and the size of the bloodclots they pass.

lusciouslips19 -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 6:05:08 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: cjan quote: Ah...the gender differences. Get a bunch of guys drinking and talking about their war stories and various skateboarding, bike, surfing, etc. injuries and pretty soon they are taking off their clothes to compare their scars. (Look! Mine is bigger/better nastier than yours!) Such a warrior mentality! I agree. I think it was Gloria Steinem (though I'm not sure) who said that if men menstruated they (we) would brag about how strong their flow was, how potent their phereomes are and the size of the bloodclots they pass. They would probably be big whiners too. if you watch shows on Tatoo shops, womens pain tolerance is way higher then men it seems. We do seem to endure more, even the non subs and vanilla women.

christine1 -> RE: Beauty..........what does it mean to you? (3/13/2008 7:07:31 PM)
my sis was in the hospital dying of cancer and she smiled and laughed and found joy despite knowing she only had a short time left. i haven't since seen anyone as beautiful as she was in those last several days. the ability to find happiness when circumstances are drastic and terrible is true beauty to me. i hope i have that kind of courage one day. edited to add: about the perfection in society, i find that i compare myself all the time to perfect images and sometimes it gets me down that i don't have my pre-baby tummy, (probably my biggest insecurity), or that i don't have the physical endurance i once had when i was younger. and yes, external validation and compliments on things ranging from job performance to a meal well presented to a good hair day will put a spring in my step.

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