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RE: Response Honesty - 3/17/2008 7:31:13 PM

Leatherist

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Urdok

Personally, I'd prefer honesty to no response if I take the time to write out a decent personal message. I try to keep to that in my responses as well, though I'm likely to say "you're not my type," rather than "you're fat/old/a cave troll."

I owe nothing to anyone I choose not to cede something to.

Even if you wrote me war and peace-I'd still need to have a reason-like being interested.

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RE: Response Honesty - 3/17/2008 7:32:45 PM

MzMia

Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
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I just changed my age to 98, so I will never have to change it again.
If someone does not approach me cause I claim to be 98, tough titties.

I figure when I get 98, I won't need to change it.
lol, when I am 99, I can lie and say I am 98.

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RE: Response Honesty - 3/17/2008 9:11:04 PM

Real_Trouble

Posts: 471
Joined: 2/25/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist
Even if you wrote me war and peace-I'd still need to have a reason-like being interested.

Especially if they wrote War and Peace! It's overrated to begin with, and it would be blatant plagiarism!

Ahem; to get back on topic, I think something I always consider is this: unless you genuinely believe the other person is deliberately fucking with you, they took a risk to try to get into contact with you. Maybe this one didn't work out, but if they aren't rude, I'm not going to be rude back. In fact, I usually will thank them and say no politely without much detail (though as I said before, if they ask, I will tell, but be careful what you wish for). In general, I think smart risk taking to get something you want is a behavior that should be rewarded, not discouraged, so I try to treat it as such.

What I don't want to do is put too much in my profile that is over-specific about what I want. I have some criteria I am very unlikely to bend on, but I very rarely say never. Thus, I'd rather keep my eyes open for kink-related Black Swans than shut the door completely.

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Post #: 63

RE: Response Honesty - 3/17/2008 9:19:56 PM

sillyfool

Posts: 286
Joined: 11/20/2007
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i understand what everyone is saying about being respectful, and if you can give a certain reason that will not be 'harmful' to another person do so... But for the most part we are all adults and personally i would rather someone just tell me the truth. Granted it needs to be in a respectful manner, but the real reason. i am a ssbbw and i understand that most people would not consider a relationship [or for some even a friendship] with me becuase of that. i am upfront with my weight, and if you have a problem with it--then you can return the respect by not wasting my time and also telling me the truth.

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RE: Response Honesty - 3/17/2008 9:21:38 PM

Leatherist

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Real_Trouble

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist
Even if you wrote me war and peace-I'd still need to have a reason-like being interested.

Especially if they wrote War and Peace! It's overrated to begin with, and it would be blatant plagiarism!

Ahem; to get back on topic, I think something I always consider is this: unless you genuinely believe the other person is deliberately fucking with you, they took a risk to try to get into contact with you. Maybe this one didn't work out, but if they aren't rude, I'm not going to be rude back. In fact, I usually will thank them and say no politely without much detail (though as I said before, if they ask, I will tell, but be careful what you wish for). In general, I think smart risk taking to get something you want is a behavior that should be rewarded, not discouraged, so I try to treat it as such.

What I don't want to do is put too much in my profile that is over-specific about what I want. I have some criteria I am very unlikely to bend on, but I very rarely say never. Thus, I'd rather keep my eyes open for kink-related Black Swans than shut the door completely.

I have some definite things that tend to annoy me in people. Which is because I'm an odd duck-I really don't care for a lot of vanilla attitudes. (at least vanilla to me)

So if I see a lot of hard limits I find silly.....romantic platitudes and exhortations of expectations (shopping lists)....I'm going to immediately lose interest. I just tell someone I really don't think we are a match-and yes I really DO mean "friends only".

I don't get nasty unless they persist. Which will happen exactly once-before I hit the block button and shut them down.

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I'm not taking custom orders.

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Post #: 65