RE: Slave Training Plan

RE: Slave Training Plan (Full Version)

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crouchingtigress -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 12:29:22 PM)
Not sure which of your two posts to add this to, because it sort of covers both in the end i moved it there though.. :) And i dont know if this will help or not, it is simply a different POV but in our relationship we are going in a different direction. A little back round: we have both been in D/s relationships that have incorporated training programs in the past, and it was great for what it was, and yet we wanted more out of it then simply the basics of behavior mods, protocols, and domestic/sexual service. We wanted something that took a larger world view. And something to celebrate the milestones, and to honor the journey. What i would ask you, is are you interested in world contribution? volunteering with kids, animals, or d/s out reach? or anything of that nature? Also what ideas have you come up with to honor and celebrate milestones as you achieve them? i think reward is IMO is a very important aspect to training programs. A little more back round: I live by the samurai code, for me having this code is deeply fulfilling and something i strive to be worthy of on a daily basis. I had sworn my oath to my sword before i met him, but as our relationship grew, we both realized that this was an integral part of who i am and what i offer him and what i could potentially offer the world. in short the code is: COURAGE. ABUNDANCE. PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY. HONOR. KNOWLEDGE. HONESTY. CONTRIBUTION. COMMITMENT. TRUST. FOCUS About my reward: I personally am not big into body mods, just not a me thing, but i do really want a carving on my chest of the Samurai symbol, that would become a blackened raised kanji scar. So as part of my service to him, i have to do a task on each one of those 10 words, (something worthy of me ie; really hard and a stretch of my comfort zones) before he will cut this symbol into me. What this gives me is a deeper appreciation of my code, and a deeper connection with him, it also allows me to go deeper in to the yummier aspects of "training" and have accountability, and reward built in. I find this very nourishing....we both do....he likes me in his service because he likes me to serve the world at his direction, as an extension of his own arms...if that makes sense?

beargonewild -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 12:43:30 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Stephann Morning Folks, I'm sitting here with a bullet list of about 14 different items, with "Slave Training Plan" at the top. So far in the bullets, I have: Journal Exercise Diet Sexual Service Career Education Spiritual For dominants, what else would you list? For submissive types, what would you anticipate on there? Just curious. Stephan As a submissive type, I find that many would be anticipated to a certain degree. Probably the anticipation I'd feel is a mixture of puzzlement and curiosity. The one issue I know I'd have a problem with is Spiritual. My thoughts is my spirituality is too personal to chance the fact my Dom may decide that my spiritual path should be akin to his

Stephann -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 12:45:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BRNaughtyAngel We see the results of it's failure or non-existence in relationships on here every single day and it is obviously an issue that does require some training or whatever you'd like to call it for a lot of people...... myself included! Communication You may very well have been a fly on our wall yesterday. Part of the motivation for this Training Plan would be we're realizing there are easier, more efficiant ways for us to communicate. Stephan

crouchingtigress -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 12:47:05 PM)
hi bear, maybe what stephann meant was to incorporate some sort of spiritual pratice? not changing your spiritual beliefs, but supporting you in finding a daily or weekly nourishment from them? this could look like incorporating meditation into your day if you are a buddist, or holding you accountable to go to church on sundays if that is what feeds your soul? thats what i read it to mean anyway.[;)]

Stephann -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 12:47:57 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: beargonewild As a submissive type, I find that many would be anticipated to a certain degree. Probably the anticipation I'd feel is a mixture of puzzlement and curiosity. The one issue I know I'd have a problem with is Spiritual. My thoughts is my spirituality is too personal to chance the fact my Dom may decide that my spiritual path should be akin to his I expected someone would mention this. For my part, addressing Spirituality doesn't mean dictating religion. It means I have a very deep seated belief that spirituality plays a vital role in emotional health. I don't expect her to believe what I believe (though we are indeed fortunate to have compatible spirtual goals, as my last slave was agnostic) but I do expect her to explore what she believes in her own manner. If she told me she wanted to be Muslim or Hindu or Discordian, I'd support her efforts so long as I felt the values she was embracing from that religion were healthy. Edit: Yes, Amy, that's more or less it. As a tangent, I suppose it's worth mentioning (and probably threadworthy of itself) that I would never permit my slave's spiritual beliefs to inhibit her service. If in giving her a command that she refused on the grounds that the command directly violates her religious code, I would consider if the command was important enough to keep the slave or not. Religious incompatiblity would probably be a dealbreaker for me. Regards, Stephan

WalterRego -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 12:54:00 PM)
Interesting stuff, this, but it's really more of a training List. Not a Plan. What does the Plan for the training consist of? Do you just say to your slave: "Keep a Journal"," Exercise daily", "Cut down on fats"? Because I would see that as a list of requirements, without a plan as to how to train your slave to do those things . Would you gradually increase rewards for standards met; or administer punishment for standards not met? Offer incentives? Praise, criticism? Say: "Keep a Journal starting with one minimum 5 sentence paragraph a day. After two weeks go to two paragraphs. Check your punctuation." I've never been trained in this sort of stuff, (then again I've never been a slave). Just curious how these things work.

beargonewild -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 12:55:35 PM)
And which I had figured you was referring to. I had assumed that was to mean a sub having to adopt their Dom's spiritual beliefs. My appologies for the misunderstanding.

Archer -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 1:04:48 PM)
Well before you can make a plan WalterRego don't you have to have the goals in mind? If you don't know where you are going any road at all will do. So the plan almost has to start with the list of goals. After the goals have been identified then the planning of how to get from here to there can start. The things you mention are pretty close to milestones (short term standards), that mark progress. They are also usefull for many folks. I also figured Stephan was on the track of I don't dictate what the spiritual path will be, but I can dictate that the slave spend at least X amount of time studying towards an identified goal on their spiritual path.

Stephann -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 1:08:56 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WalterRego Interesting stuff, this, but it's really more of a training List. Not a Plan. What does the Plan for the training consist of? Do you just say to your slave: "Keep a Journal"," Exercise daily", "Cut down on fats"? Because I would see that as a list of requirements, without a plan as to how to train your slave to do those things . Would you gradually increase rewards for standards met; or administer punishment for standards not met? Offer incentives? Praise, criticism? Say: "Keep a Journal starting with one minimum 5 sentence paragraph a day. After two weeks go to two paragraphs. Check your punctuation." I've never been trained in this sort of stuff, (then again I've never been a slave). Just curious how these things work. To be fair, I was eliciting ideas for the Plan. I'm a whole plan, top down kinda guy. I draw up general plans, and start cutting those general topics into pieces. So it goes something like: Mind Body Spirit Under Body, I'd scribble in Diet, Exercise, Sex. Under Diet, I'd list "Vegetables (she loves them, I haven't been buying enough of them) Water (she doesn't drink enough, find ways to increase the amount, I know she hates tap water, buy small bottles of water), seafood (she loves seafood, buy more, plan more meals using it), etc etc etc. I'm not trying to set up a system where I'm constantly punishing her. If I have to spend half my day beating her for infractions, I'm using half of both our day on negative activities and preventing her from performing the rest of her duties. Hope that fills in the blanks for you. Stephan

TracyTaken -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 1:24:16 PM)
quote: I find this very nourishing....we both do....he likes me in his service because he likes me to serve the world at his direction, as an extension of his own arms...if that makes sense? It makes a beautiful kind of sense.

roughleather -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 1:41:11 PM)
Well, first get the spam links out of your postings. Is this for real, or one of those lame fantasies like "slave contracts". Training a sub can be fun. Here are a few things I've done. Work on her posture. Make her walk around with a book balanced on her head. That's a good exercise to give her the look of a proud, trained sub. Take her for a hike on a hot day. Make her wear something a bit too skimpy, like very short cutoffs and a ratty tank top. Make it a tough enough hike that she has to work at it, so she stops being self-concious about showing too much. Pour a water bottle over her as a reward. Sit her down nude, and look into her eyes. Look over her body She has to look straight back and not lower her eyes. A slave is not allowed shame. If she breaks eye contact before you do, a few whacks with a crop will teach her to do it right. Thereafter, she's expected to meet the eyes of anyone who looks her over in public. They'll flinch from the eye contact, and she'll feel her sexual power. This arouses most women. Train her to respond to hand signals. Hold out your hand, palm down. The top of her head must not rise above your hand. Without touching her, force her to her knees. Then down to the floor. Let her up to her knees, then force her down to the floor. Then force her to push her face into the floor. Let her rise to a stand and release her. Then ask her how it felt, and talk over her feelings. Teach her a few more hand signals which she must instantly obey. Don't use them too often, but often enough to remind her. So those are a few slave training tricks. This is a head game. You're forcing her outside her normal behavior patterns to make her a proud, shameless, obedient slut.

KnightofMists -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 2:15:37 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: AquaticSub Training is instruction. Instruction is for those who know they don't already know everything. Training is not just for instruction... it's also about perfecting or improving a given skill/talent. How many times did the Allies trained and practice specific manuvers that prepared them for D-Day. How many times did the Astronauts practice and trained for shuttle landings in a simulator. How many times did Gold medal Olympic Athelets train in their given event before they competed and won their event. Training is for anyone that desires to learn, improve, perfect a given skill/talent. Only an Idiot would consider training just for the weak.

derfrewop -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 2:24:24 PM)
quote: But I like the idea of adding "fun." I agree with Tracy. Every single one of those items can easily become extremely boring, frustrating and annoying. Look at it this way, none of the items would be on the list if they were areas she naturally enjoys. If you are planning on having her work on all of those things, planning how to keep it fun or at least planning a way to let loose when it gets too much should be a real high priority.

TracyTaken -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 2:35:35 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: derfrewop quote: But I like the idea of adding "fun." I agree with Tracy. Every single one of those items can easily become extremely boring, frustrating and annoying. Look at it this way, none of the items would be on the list if they were areas she naturally enjoys. If you are planning on having her work on all of those things, planning how to keep it fun or at least planning a way to let loose when it gets too much should be a real high priority. On my list of things to do is: Build a garden. He didn't add it because he really wants a garden but because I really need something enjoyable, a zen thing, amongst the drudgery we have goin' on right now.

KnightofMists -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 2:42:45 PM)
here is just few.... Time management Stress Management Power of Person Authority Transfer Asking questions/Seeking permissions Love in Relationship Play/Scening Protocols of Behavior Structure for learning protocol/behavior changes The Poly Family! Poly vs. monogamous thinking – How to move from one to the other Jealousy vrs Envy Proper communication of Feelings and Thoughts Effective communication – What is it 24/7… What is it Topping/bottoming… What is it The Collar – It’s meaning Family outside Raising the little ones in an M/s poly house Functioning Long distance relationships Uncertainty…The cracks in the foundation My Code – “Do my will, harm none” Punishment in My world Discipline in My world Fear… the enemy within Willful Disobedience…. My Hard Limit Pleasures, Indifferences and challenges to the Slave Demonstrating significance to each other. Anger Management Active and passive dominance/submission Submission… How I see it Dominance… How I see it M/s dynamic.. Authority Transfer! Sadism… a Part of the Whole Triggers/Buttons Building a connection Character Strengths! Mindfulness Needs and Wants Introvert/Extrovert Health Management

Katchoo -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 2:44:24 PM)
"Transparency"... so essential, yet so challenging

CalifChick -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 3:03:42 PM)
I find it really interesting what some people view as "fun." Pass, thanks. Cali

daddysliloneds -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 3:06:44 PM)
sounds more like the rules of your house, so to speak, instead of 'training'; what exactly are you 'training' them to do? anyone can write a list, and tell someone to do something or expect it of them, but 'training' as i know it, is teaching a 'specialized skill'... there's nothing 'special' about writing a journal, giving sexual service, staying healthy, etc., and none of those things are things that myself and my partner wouldn't already know about each other if we actually 'both' communicated once in a while; sooooooooo, with that said, i wouldn't 'anticipate' those or any other things to be added to a 'list' that someone tries to play off as 'training'. quote: ORIGINAL: Stephann Morning Folks, I'm sitting here with a bullet list of about 14 different items, with "Slave Training Plan" at the top. So far in the bullets, I have: Journal Exercise Diet Sexual Service Career Education Spiritual For dominants, what else would you list? For submissive types, what would you anticipate on there? Just curious. Stephan

DiurnalVampire -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 3:08:40 PM)
The only real training my boys have gotten have to do with watching their diets, managing their money and their time. Anything else is just teaching them how to do what I like, in the context of their relationship with me. I dont have a list, becasue Id have to write a new one for each boy. DV

TracyTaken -> RE: Slave Training Plan (3/26/2008 3:14:34 PM)
quote: there's nothing 'special' about writing a journal, giving sexual service, staying healthy, etc., and none of those things are things that myself and my partner wouldn't already know about each other if we actually 'both' communicated once in a while; sooooooooo, with that said, i wouldn't 'anticipate' those or any other things to be added to a 'list' that someone tries to play off as 'training'. What do you mean by "play off"? It's not weely weel, it's not truuuly true? Got news for ya: Lots of people who stay healthy are on training programs. Anyone who can write in a journal can also fly an airplane, but just because they can does not mean that they do, eh? Training is about "doing." And since when did something have to be "special" to qualify as training? You must be a very special person.

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