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RE: My Master said... - 3/29/2008 10:37:50 PM

BitaTruble

Posts: 9779
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From: Texas
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quote:

ORIGINAL: amayos

Can a Master be a lover or friend first and a Master second?

Such would take me out of my comfort zone. Not that I particulary expect to always be comfortable, but if it was consistently 'friend first' and Master second, I think I would become confused over where the lines were drawn. Without clearly delineated boundaries, following his path may prove difficult if not impossible. Himself views me objectively, not subjectively especially in terms of my behavior. Unacceptable is unacceptable and for those whom he owned/owns, it doesn't matter if he also likes you, loves you or cherishes you, behavior is dealt with in the manner which he deems appropriate.

Then, of course, sometimes he just feels like doing something to hurt me and sets aside his own emotions which may interfer with his desire to express his sadistic self. That's his choice and part of my duty as his slave is to accept such and present my entire self to him for that purpose.

Sometimes I wonder how someone can hurt someone whom they claim to love in ways which cause so much pain. I just don't have that sort of control over my emotions and to set up by choice to hurt someone that I have a deep and abiding love for isn't within me, at least as far as I know. In the end, I'm grateful to him for it, because sometimes that's exactly what I need. Hmm.. maybe that's exactly why he does it. ::shrugs:: Who knows. I need to breathe now, anyway.

Celeste

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Post #: 41

RE: My Master said... - 3/30/2008 2:54:34 AM

StormsSlave

Posts: 629
Joined: 2/6/2008
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Odd. My Lord and I were lovers and friends first, and that part comes first. The relationship is way, WAY more important than the d/s aspect, and will remain that way. Him mastering me in the bedroom or out doesn't change that. I couldn't give my will over to anyone who couldn't laugh with me, play with me, wipe my tears, and help us help each other through the tough times. Hell, what if I have a giggle fit during the session.??!?? Will he laugh with me or beat it out of me? Hmm...well, both do hold their appeal, but I'd like the smile, either way. If his being master comes before the relationship, check please! I'm outta here. Of course, ours is relationship, and not just play partners, so the dynamic might be different.

Hitting below the belt? Well, wtf does that mean? Did he do something or say something? Was the something intended to edify the relationship, or to put you through some sadistic test to see if you're worthy? My Lord has stated truths that hit below the belt, but didn't make them any less true or worthy of my attention. I hope I have done the same for him, sub or no. Since we don't fight dirty, so far we've managed to avoid doing it just to hurt each other. In your case, without more information, there's not really anyway anyone can assist you with this, imho.

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Post #: 42

RE: my Master said... - 3/30/2008 3:24:06 PM

HerLord

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Joined: 2/14/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sexysusieq11215

my Master professed undying love and then took a personal event and hit me below the belt with it....arent a Master and sub supposed to be friends....?

IceCream You scream We all scream... Oh quit whinning. If He was worth his salt, you would know and would NOT be here bitching about him. Find another dude.

*edited to add*
And if HE is worth his salt and you are still crying... I would tell him to find a new Her.

< Message edited by HerLord -- 3/30/2008 3:25:11 PM >

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Post #: 43

RE: my Master said... - 3/31/2008 4:28:02 PM

Sageandaslave

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Joined: 1/13/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Bound2One

For myself, if someone professed undying love for me and then purposely hurt me, then no, I wouldn't be pleased. If someone professed this love I'd expect friendship to be part of the package. You need to talk with him. Have you known him long?

Are we friends? or are we FRIENDS????? <wink>
Master

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Post #: 44

RE: my Master said... - 4/11/2008 4:08:35 AM

chyanna

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Joined: 11/3/2007
From: stafford, England
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I became friends with my Master, before going down the road of BDSM, we got to know all about each other, developed a bond, trust, respect and after 6 months of learning about each other we then met and it was awesome. He really got into my head.....Yes He is my Master now, someone told me once dont run before you walk or push everything too fast or you will end up hurt

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Post #: 45

RE: my Master said... - 4/11/2008 9:22:48 AM

AMaster

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Sorry, I don't understand the question.

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Post #: 46

RE: My Master said... - 4/11/2008 11:22:18 AM

Stephann

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Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
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quote:

ORIGINAL: amayos

quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696

I can be a friend first..and then get interested in a girl. Doesn't make the "friendship"suddenly go away..or less important then domination.

Can a Master be a lover or friend first and a Master second? It's an interesting thing to think about. I personally don't believe Master can take secondary or even equal importance to another relational dynamic and still retain the essence of its meaning. I think believing so is where many get into trouble.

Master and Mistress are heavy words, or they should be considered such, in the least. Opinion. Not the decree of Chairman Mao.

I don't think so. Ownership of a person trumps friendship of a person.

In my time in the Marines, I was 20, enlisted, married. I made friends with my boss, who was a first Lieutenant who was 26. At work, it was "Yes Sir, no Sir." When we were out shooting pool, it was "That was a really shitty shot, Denny." Techically, our friendship was against regulations and we were fully aware of that fact. In public, I deferred to him at all times, and treated him in a manner expected by the social standards imposed on us. Our friendship stopped at the office doorway, and our professional relationship kicked in.

He couldn't be my friend, when he was being my boss. When he didn't have to be my boss, we could be friends. The two never, and never could, overlap. When addressing Lt. Jones, he was no closer to being my friend than the statute next to him was.

Stephan

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Post #: 47

RE: my Master said... - 4/11/2008 12:33:00 PM

NorthernGent

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Joined: 7/10/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sexysusieq11215

my Master professed undying love and then took a personal event and hit me below the belt with it....arent a Master and sub supposed to be friends....?

Shouldn't you be thanking him for smacking your arse with a belt?

Manners and gratitude must be dead 'round these parts.

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Post #: 48

RE: my Master said... - 4/11/2008 1:36:33 PM

antipode

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Cryptic unclear question, 200 different answers. The usual.

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Post #: 49