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What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight off? - 3/28/2008 6:56:28 AM   
GoddessTeaze


Posts: 1125
Joined: 10/14/2006
From: The Netherlands
Status: offline
What atracts you to a Dominant, and do you feel is truly importent??

&

What is a total turn off for you ?

I wish you all enough.

Warm Greetingz

GoddezzT`


< Message edited by GoddessTeaze -- 3/28/2008 6:57:09 AM >

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RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 7:15:44 AM   
OsideGirl


Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline 		There are a lot of things that are important to me in a mate. 

The early three turn offs are:

-The guy that doesn't understand the difference between "domineering" and "dominant".

-The guy that thinks he's somehow the exception.

-The Uber-Dom

There are others, but those three won't get past a two minute conversation with me.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
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RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 7:35:38 AM   
chamberqueen


Posts: 1597
Joined: 10/25/2007
From: Kalamazoo, MI
Status: offline 		When I was still an active Mistress I was told that what turned men on about me was my intelligence.  Ironically, when these same men wrote back to once I became a slave they told me that they were sure I would be successful at it - because of my intelligence.  

Another thing I was told was a turn on, which is also helpful on both sides of the lifestyle, is my understanding of people and willingness to ask the right questions to get them to open up.  For some it was my range of toys, for some my looks, but for most it was the combination of intelligence and a true caring for the person.


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(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
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RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 7:38:43 AM   
Shawn1066


Posts: 987
Joined: 10/7/2007
Status: offline 		Intelligence is a huge turn on.  Arrogance is a huge turn off.  A sense of humor is a huge turn on.  A sense of superiority is a huge turn off.

DV's Fox

(in reply to chamberqueen)
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RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 8:19:28 AM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Intelligence and if I can watch them interact with others.  The way they carry themselves.

Two major issues that have to be there for me to have future interest.

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
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RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 8:29:55 AM   
OmegaG


Posts: 1474
Joined: 10/23/2007
Status: offline 		well put Fox.

I am turned on my an open mind and conversely turned off by a closed one.  In the past when I was looking, I tended to end contact quickly with those who inteded to mold me to be a replica of every person they'd had before.

And I run from those who think that an s-type should not have an opinion.

_____________________________


Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable. Sydney J. Harris

Sex without pain is like food without taste.
- de Sade

(in reply to Shawn1066)
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RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 8:36:00 AM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		I will have to say  intelligence  also I want to be able to talk to my Master out of a scene as well as in one.  Another huge turn on for me is confidence a man who is confident would have when i was looking get another look from me.  A sense of humor is a real big turn on also.

Turn offs well lack of intelligence, guys who think just cause they call themseles Masters i should fall at their feet.  Poor grooming. Guys who think because i am submissive i should be submissive to all,as someones tag line says i am a submissive but not your submissive.

Matt's littleone


(in reply to sub4hire)
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RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 8:44:43 AM   
BBWnNC72


Posts: 1155
Joined: 6/22/2007
From: NC since Jan of 2007, but born and raised in Cali
Status: offline 		The first thing i notice when i receive messages from some one is the grammar.  i can not stand some one who doesn't take the time to spell out things.  i really loath abbreviations. 

What attracts me to a Dominant?  Humor, the ability to laugh and have a good time.  It is not all about the "lifestyle" every minute of every day.  There is always respect, but sheeesh people have fun too! Then the usual things like honesty, the ability to take care of themselves and having control of their own life. 
The one thing that turns me off right away?  Bad, uncared for teeth.  Then the "i am better then you are, because i am a Dominant"or "you must submit because you are a submissive".

_____________________________

huggs and purrs
Brian's kat
a.k.a. "greedy monkey"
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
i am who i am, i am not ashamed. spank me, beat me, bite me, pull my hair, dominate me, control me, but always respect me for who i am.


(in reply to OmegaG)
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RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 8:45:53 AM   
TethersEnd


Posts: 102
Joined: 1/29/2007
Status: offline 		Intelligence
Confidence
Humor
Humility
The Ability and Desire to Communicate

of course there is also physical traits too.
He Must carry himself well, take pride in his appearance. 
He also needs to have his life in working order, not perfection,
but he has to be able to function in the Real World. 

edited to add the ucky stuff! 
it totally squicks me out when I have more confidence then they do. 
or when I have to explain big words. 
another thing that gets my attention is when they begin to sprout feathers if they think they
got caught doing something they shouldnt.  you know, that deer in the headlights look? 
then there's also that false bravado that puffs some up too large for their own good. 
I also cant stand a lack of follow through, a life screwed up more then mine is.
But the worse has to be empty words.



< Message edited by TethersEnd -- 3/28/2008 9:02:21 AM >

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The problem with communication ... is the illusion that it has been accomplished.
~George Bernard Shaw

(in reply to littleone35)
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RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 8:51:58 AM   
tarnishdhaylo


Posts: 44
Joined: 8/23/2007
Status: offline 		Humor
intelligence
Ability to communication
and he must be a good kisser

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
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RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 8:55:46 AM   
Mercnbeth


Posts: 11766
Status: offline
quote:

What atracts you to a Dominant, and do you feel is truly importent??

 
self-knowledge, self-confidence, a keen sense of humor.
 
quote:

What is a total turn off for you ?

 
a submissive posing as a Dom.

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 8:59:22 AM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline
quote:


What atracts you to a Dominant, and do you feel is truly importent??
 
Power
Intelligence
Self Confidence
Self Awareness
Humor


quote:

What is a total turn off for you ?
 
Uncertainty
Lack of self awareness
Being absent of any of the "turn-ons" listed above
 
 
Edited to add, I suppose I could have just pointed to beth and said "Ditto"
 
(Tried to fix quotes but they're winning the battle)


< Message edited by ownedgirlie -- 3/28/2008 9:01:31 AM >

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Good is the enemy of great.

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
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RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 9:04:48 AM   
TreasureKY


Posts: 3032
Joined: 4/10/2007
From: Kentucky
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessTeaze

What atracts you to a Dominant, and do you feel is truly importent??


Common sense... it's so uncommon these days.     Decisiveness, confidence and quick wit are also turn-ons, as well as intelligence.  In addition to these, they must be truly dominant... none of this "I'll label myself as a dominant so I can get what I want but I really don't want to be responsible, in charge or make decisions".

quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessTeaze

What is a total turn off for you ?


Lack of the above.

Edited to correct quote formatting.

quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

(Tried to fix quotes but they're winning the battle)


lol... I had the same problem.


< Message edited by TreasureKY -- 3/28/2008 9:09:06 AM >

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 12:08:21 PM   
Wheldrake


Posts: 477
Status: offline 		In my world the most attractive qualities in a dominant are intelligence, humour, responsibility, decisiveness, open-mindedness, confidence, groundedness (a sense of being down-to-earth and realistic about things) and, of course, the absolute essentials of lust, sadism, a perverse imagination, and a capacity for delight in having power over a helpless piece of human property. One could hardly expect another human being to have all these qualities in abundance, but the more of them the better.

Unattractive qualities are the opposites of the attractive ones, but particularly shrillness, prissiness, and superficiality. Beauty and physique are pretty much irrelevant.

Looking back at what I've written, I see that most of the characteristics I've listed as attractive or unattractive apply to people in general - not just dominants.

(in reply to TreasureKY)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 1:11:05 PM   
DefiantFlower


Posts: 204
Joined: 2/15/2007
Status: offline 		Turn ons...
   REAL confidence
   A piercing intellect that's always two steps ahead
   Sense of humor
   Playfulness
   Sensitivity
   Done in the right way, that yummy cocky patronizing tone of voice
   Muscle!

Turn offs...
   Funky smells
   Poor personal hygiene (hair, teeth, etc)
   Life more fucked up than mine
   Faking anything...i can usually tell
   Incapable of respecting boundaries
   Shallowness
   Too much disorganization
   Pretty much any absence of the turn ons
 
  

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 1:19:20 PM   
softness


Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
From: Leeds, UK
Status: offline 		Turn on
Intelligence, wit, insight, perception, understanding what "classics" means, real life experience that has nothing to do with a BDSM but about actual LIFE, makes eye contact often and easily even with a lowly submissive, socially at ease.

Turn offs
Third person self referential, no sense of humour, bad breath, patronising, obviously more interesting in my tits than anything coming out of my mouth.

but the aboslute hum dinger of a turn off

CALLING ME LITTLE ONE!!!! ... am 5 foot fricken 10 ... My ass is the size of a small car... I AM NOT LITTLE!!! metaphorically, literally, OR OTHERWISE

pants ... breathes... pants ... breathes ..... really needs to stop going to munches full of old men

_____________________________

proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio





(in reply to DefiantFlower)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 1:23:45 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline 		What,you mean these incredible and powerful masters don't turn you on?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vaeD9XFyWXo

< Message edited by Leatherist -- 3/28/2008 1:24:08 PM >

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My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to softness)
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RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 1:27:09 PM   
Gleegal67


Posts: 218
Joined: 6/18/2007
From: Phoenix
Status: offline 		Attraction within the first 2 minutes...

Smile
Appearance
Confidence
Intellect
Voice
Sense of humor

Turn-off within the first 2 seconds...

Appearance - lack of hygiene
Arrogance
Lack of intellect
Submissive in Wannabe Dominant Shell
Grating Voice



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~always the gleeful one~

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 1:42:57 PM   
sambamanslilgirl


Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline 		turn offs are much simplier for me to discuss. i don't like dominants who display lack of communication skills and manners; who demand instant play session/submission and who don't understand there needs to be trust, compatialbity and communication as a foundation to build a relationship.

Daddy's the direct opposite and more - it's why we're able to connect instantly almost 2 yrs ago


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...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...


...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: What atracts you to a Dom/me or turns you straight ... - 3/28/2008 2:05:46 PM   
gallowmere


Posts: 4
Joined: 7/23/2007
From: Massachusetts
Status: offline 		The first thing I notice is intelliegence, intelect, wit, whatever you want to call it.  That piercing just sort of... passive understanding. 

I consider myself very bright, and very witty, and when I find someone who easily beats me at my own little game, it will instantly get my attention.       

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)
Profile   Post #: 20
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