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SteelofUtah -> ~~Let's be Friends.....Now can I see you Naked??~~ (3/28/2008 4:07:27 PM)
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Okay I am sure that I will take some heat for this but , such is life.
Okay I have seen MANY MANY MANY profiles that says, "I'm looking for friends first and we'll see where that goes." seems harmless enough, seems simple and clean. Ahhhh, but there is something that sits behind that phrase that is agrivating me to no end.
I have had subs who were friends, I met them at Munches and I knew thier Master/Mistresses and when they were single I knew who they were interested in and what was going on with them and I also knew where the line was. I knew the boundry that existed, however with girls online I am COMPLETELY LOST.
Case # 001- We'll call her "girliegirl", I met her online and offered to be her friend, and MEANT FRIEND, and after the initial "Dog Sniffing" Portion of our relationship where I sniffed out what she was all about and she sniffed out what I was all about we started talking about what she wanted in a relationship and who she was meeting and she started asking my advice and even asking me if I thought someone was good enough for her and well once after a slew of bad failed relationships she confessed to me she wished she could meet a Dom like me, to which I said "Odd, I happen to BE a Dom like me, and I have always been fond of you so, hey here's a Model Idea How about ....ME?" to which she freaked out and got all shy and we talked two more times and then ZERO contact and ZERO Reasons.
Case # 002 - We'll call her "SweetCharity", Talked a LOT, always flirty and ALWAYS blunt, I was always honest about the fact that if she wanted to come out for a weekend fling that she was welcome to but we BOTH knew that a relationship would NEVER happen, so we go on talking and one day things get very personal and very real and we start getting into the "What am I doing Wrong" Debate and I give HONEST, THIS IS HOW I FEEL answers and I am very blunt and I know that what I am saying isn't the sweet and kind answer but at least I'm willing to be HONEST and well Now evertime we talk the conversation seems strained like we are forcing ourselves NOT to talk about something. The Elephant in the Living room if you will.
Case # 003 - We'll call her "NastyBetty", Started out with her complimenting me on my Posts and telling me that although she doesn't always agree with me she respects what I write and would I like to be friends, I ask ALL SORTS of questions, I am TRYING to get to know her as a FRIEND and getting ANY kind of information is like pulling teeth from a very alert gorilla. So I finally mention that I am putting 100% into getting to know you as a friend and feel like I'm getting nothing but a brick wall, to which she says I am very Protective and I need to trust someone before I open up to them. At this point I got very confused and perhaps a little annoyed and asked "How can you get to know me if I'm doing all the work and you aren't willing to offer anything is return? If you want to be friends don't you think I deserve to at least know a little about the person I am letting be MY Friend?" This of course was met with No answer at all and again NO CONTACT and NO REASON.
Case # 004 - We'll call her "lil`sara" In becoming her friend I found I had feelings for her and wanted more however I respected that she was in a relatioship and just wanted frineds and I tried really really hard JUST to be her frined, one day after a long period of no contact because she was in college I get an e-mail that she is no longer with the Ex and that she misses me. I had carried my feeling for her for some time and now I figured I had to take my chance and in a single conversation I spilled my guts and beared my heart to bleeding and told her how I felt and what I wanted and how I thought it could work to which she said she had similar feelings for me but wanted to know how it could possile work to which I offered her at least four (4) different possible solutions to which she said nothing, then said she had to go and I havn't heard from her since.
So why have I called this ~~Lets be Friends.....Now can I see you Naked??~~ Well because someone e-mailed me today and asked me why I bother to put that I just want to be friends when every woman I try to be frieds with I try to sleep with?
This Blew me off my chair. Now I know that I am looking for a second girl and that some might think that everything I say is a play to get someone to agree to being a second girl but lets cut the crap, every girl I ever talk to I am respectful of the fact that they are Friends and with the exception of "lil`sara" Had not once suggested that they be anything more than friends unless THEY wanted to but that I was willing to be friends no matter what they just needed to set a BOUNDRY!!
There is that word. Boundry. Look I like women and I am a FLIRT Friend or not Hell I flirt with lil old ladies at the super market to see if I can make em blush. If someone says "Steel, I only want to be your friend and nothing more" Then I still flirt but I know it will NEVER go anywhere and If the issue is that I am a Flirt then I have to ask if they are being MY frined when they aren't accepting the person that I am. I am a Flirt, if they were really my frined they would know it's harmless and leave it at that.
So the QUESTION? Do you think it is really possible for Male Dom's and Female subs to be friends when there is flirting involved or when the friendship is emotionally involved? Do you think that a Female Domme can be frineds with a Male sub and keep it STRICTLY Platonic? And do you think that they relationships can be sustained when one person is interested in the other for any reason.
When Sex is involved, or rather sexual attraction, can Friendship actually be achieved?
Do you often think that just because the person being your friend discusses sexuality with you that they are only intersted in having sex with you?
How is frindship in this lifestyle supposed to be sustained in this lifestyle if everyone simply assumes the worst of the other person?
Okay that's a LOT of questions just answer the ones that you want.
Steel
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