|
PairOfDimes -> RE: Of Course You Are Bi. You’re A Submissive (4/12/2008 3:34:20 PM)
|
Yuck. That really devalues both submission and bisexuality.
It is true that there are quite a lot of women in BDSM communities who are bisexual, and that there are quite a lot of women in BDSM communities who submit (either as part of their switch identities, or as their primary identity), and that there's a lot of overlap between those groups, so much that it might lead people to make erroneous guesses about sexual- or power- orientation at play parties. Heck, in general there are more openly bi people in alt-sex communities than there are generally--the better test case there is bi men, but that's another thread. At any rate, it's true that some female submissives will consent to homosexual activities that they wouldn't seek out ordinarily, perhaps as part of a "forced bi" experience. And it's certainly true that this particular person gets to say that he wants a relationship with a person (a woman?) who is both submissive and bisexual.
But for heaven's sake...even if it's common, and even if it's a reasonable thing to ask for, it's not a universal rule, and part of politeness is recognizing that! When I've gauged someone's sexual- or power- orientation wrongly, or when I've failed to appreciate a nuance of it (like a woman who identifies as a bi switch, but who bottoms to men and tops women), I've tried very hard to withdraw with graceful apologies, and I've also tried to be gracious when people peg me wrongly. I think that this guy might have a reasonable idea to express (I want a bi submissive) but he's going about it altogether wrongly.
|
|
|
|
