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Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/16/2005 8:38:07 PM   
fyreredsub


Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
Status: offline 		if your sub/slave was trying to thank you for a priviledge or gift you had allowed her would you dismiss her during her thanks w/out waiting to hear it, by saying," if you say another word something bad will happen"(ie punishment)?
Is doing so perhaps damaging to her psyche or the relationship?Or is that an acceptable practice to dismiss during a time when a 'thank you 'should come about?
and on the other side of the coin...
Subs/Slaves how would you feel if something similiar had happened to you?
Would you feel slighted or hurt?
Or what if it was someone that you were just being considered by would you continue with getting to know that person or move on?
Would be be worse for you if it was your Master?

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/16/2005 8:42:25 PM   
EmeraldSlave2


Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: fyreredsub

if your sub/slave was trying to thank you for a priviledge or gift you had allowed her would you dismiss her during her thanks w/out waiting to hear it, by saying," if you say another word something bad will happen"(ie punishment)?

Depends on what was going on...but sure.
quote:


Is doing so perhaps damaging to her psyche or the relationship?

I'd hope that just a simple order and a single cut off wouldn't be enough to damage one of my partners! Maybe get their feelings a bit hurt but that's about it.

quote:

Or is that an acceptable practice to dismiss during a time when a 'thank you 'should come about?

Of course it's acceptable, how else is the slave to learn what's bad timing and what isn't?
quote:


Subs/Slaves how would you feel if something similiar had happened to you?
Depends, might be a bit sad or miffed, but get over it and come back when I knew timing was better.
quote:


Or what if it was someone that you were just being considered by would you continue with getting to know that person or move on?
Would be be worse for you if it was your Master?

It would add something to the "questions clipboard" but it wouldn't be a make or break thing. It's just a single rebuff- not a huge deal IMO.

(in reply to fyreredsub)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/16/2005 9:05:11 PM   
OscarHargraves


Posts: 693
Joined: 8/9/2005
Status: offline 		In the Vanilla world this would probably be considered quite rude. The problem is you have to take into account the timing (as ES said) and the mood of the Dom. A compliment at the wrong time could be construed as a whining or maybe some way of trying to get out of something else.

Having said that, I would have to say that I would probably not do this. I would probably let the Sub finish what she was saying and acknowledge that. Then, if I felt there was a problem, I would bring that up. But please remember I'm a Dom and not a Master and I don't live in a 24/7 relationship with my Sub.

_____________________________

Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly ! !

(in reply to fyreredsub)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/16/2005 9:46:36 PM   
JohnWarren


Posts: 3807
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Delray Beach, FL
Status: offline 		I like compliments, particularly those rendered with enthusiasm and skill.

"Ah, you missed a spot there, dear."

_____________________________

www.lovingdominant.org

(in reply to fyreredsub)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/17/2005 3:20:50 AM   
Raphael


Posts: 263
Joined: 5/10/2005
Status: offline 		Perhaps she mis-judged what time it actually was in this case?


(in reply to fyreredsub)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/17/2005 9:11:30 AM   
fyreredsub


Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
Status: offline 		thanks ya'll, your input is always good to process for different situations and dealing w/ cognitive schemas that may or may not need changing.

< Message edited by fyreredsub -- 10/17/2005 9:13:51 AM >

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/17/2005 9:45:53 AM   
Kinkypupper


Posts: 713
Joined: 9/26/2004
From: Portland oregon
Status: offline 		Politeness and respect/ courtesy is ALWAYS welcome

_____________________________

Phil Moulton
A Sensual Touch
Locopony Racing
Portland Oregon

(in reply to fyreredsub)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/17/2005 9:57:43 AM   
greenie


Posts: 579
Joined: 7/24/2005
Status: offline 		Sometimes it's better to show appreciation rather then saying how appreciative you are. if i was in a situation where He was cutting off my thanks then i would just go out of my way to show Him how thankful i was.

_____________________________

"According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful."
-- Robert DE Niro

(in reply to Kinkypupper)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/17/2005 11:00:41 AM   
TheChastiser


Posts: 95
Joined: 10/16/2005
From: Hemel Hempstead
Status: offline 		if my slave was thanking me, then of course i wouldnt cut her off in mid speech, unless i was busy of course. one reason for this would be,that i would evaluate from the gratitude that it was indeed given for the right reason and that if the thanks were because of a lesson learnt; her words would indicate that the lesson had been learnt properly.

Mike


_____________________________



Let Me unchain your mind and your sexuality will follow.


(in reply to fyreredsub)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/17/2005 2:03:47 PM   
Sub03


Posts: 600
Joined: 4/30/2005
Status: offline 		Im not a Dom but if i was i think i would want to hear a thank you for something i had done. As a sub if i was cut off like that i might be a lil hurt but i guess it all depends on the circumstances.

(in reply to TheChastiser)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/17/2005 3:39:33 PM   
MrDiscipline44


Posts: 1776
Joined: 1/5/2005
Status: offline
quote:

if your sub/slave was trying to thank you for a priviledge or gift you had allowed her would you dismiss her during her thanks w/out waiting to hear it, by saying," if you say another word something bad will happen"(ie punishment)?


Sometimes it's not be what you say but how you say it. One can say something with all the love and honest emotion one can have for another, but if it doesn't sound sincere, you minus well be flipping that person off. The sub might have meant it to be a show of appreciation but to the Master/Dominant, it sounded like the snide remark of a SAM. I, for one, hate over exaggeration. Say either "Thank you, Sir" or "Yes Sir" and move on. Don't sit there and say "Thank you, thank you, thank you" while kissing my boots unless that is what I've told you to do. But then, thats just me.

(in reply to fyreredsub)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/17/2005 3:48:17 PM   
fyreredsub


Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
Status: offline 		no it was just a quick simple thank you for a priviledge

_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to MrDiscipline44)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/17/2005 3:50:50 PM   
fyreredsub


Posts: 3403
Joined: 10/7/2005
Status: offline 		now this is a good thought


quote:

ORIGINAL: greenie

Sometimes it's better to show appreciation rather then saying how appreciative you are. if i was in a situation where He was cutting off my thanks then i would just go out of my way to show Him how thankful i was.



_____________________________

"Accordingly, men must then either fulfill their nature, or deny it, and in denying their nature, deny us ours, for ours is the complement to theirs. " Renegades

(in reply to greenie)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/17/2005 9:06:18 PM   
Soulhuntre


Posts: 223
Joined: 9/29/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: fyreredsub
if your sub/slave was trying to thank you for a priviledge or gift you had allowed her would you dismiss her during her thanks w/out waiting to hear it, by saying," if you say another word something bad will happen"(ie punishment)?


Sure. If it wasn't convenient, if the timing was wrong or if I just plain didn't want to hear here voice at the moment. Even to say thank you, speaking is a priviledge here - it must be perfectly timed or it will simply be taken away.

quote:

ORIGINAL: fyreredsub
Is doing so perhaps damaging to her psyche or the relationship?Or is that an acceptable practice to dismiss during a time when a 'thank you 'should come about?


No offense, but there is no way I would deal with someone who was so fragile that something like that would be damaging to them emotionally. If someone couldn't handle a simple rebuff like that with balance and grace then they have no hope of survival in my world.

< Message edited by Soulhuntre -- 10/18/2005 6:38:05 PM >

(in reply to fyreredsub)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/17/2005 11:07:57 PM   
Wolfie648


Posts: 600
Joined: 9/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

if your sub/slave was trying to thank you for a priviledge or gift you had allowed her would you dismiss her during her thanks w/out waiting to hear it, by saying," if you say another word something bad will happen"(ie punishment)?


Often when my slave tries to say something mushy to express whatever passing emotion she is feeling for whatever trivial kindness she thinks I have afforded her, I do cut her off. As someone else posted in a different fashion - actions speak louder than words. I particularly enjoy watching her squirm, mentally, as she tries to think of a way to do it.

I would have to say that timing does play more than a minor part and she has a sense of timing like a Shakespear's tragedy. (Honestly tho' this is more of a life intruding it's ugly head than her fault kind of situation).

D (owner of j)

< Message edited by Wolfie648 -- 10/17/2005 11:08:15 PM >

(in reply to fyreredsub)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/19/2005 5:34:23 AM   
Prunesquallor


Posts: 181
Joined: 10/12/2005
Status: offline 		It seems from this thread that many people think that a good Master should behave like a total shit.

This is not my view. I think that domination, even hard domination, can be carried out with consideration and courtesy. But that is my own individual view of what a Master should be, and each and every Master has his own view. I think in a question like this, there is no 'right' way.

(in reply to Wolfie648)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/19/2005 6:15:23 AM   
EmeraldSlave2


Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Prunesquallor

It seems from this thread that many people think that a good Master should behave like a total shit.

This is not my view. I think that domination, even hard domination, can be carried out with consideration and courtesy. But that is my own individual view of what a Master should be, and each and every Master has his own view. I think in a question like this, there is no 'right' way.

No- but it means that if the slave is making a mistake, he or she has accepted that the master can correct the slave, in whatever way they find appropriate.

Sometimes, cutting them off and hurting their feelings just a bit is the perfect way to send a good message and teach a good lesson. This isn't about all fuzzy yummies.

Of course a master can be kind and sweet and giving and polite, but learning and growing and training isn't always soft and sweet.

(in reply to Prunesquallor)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/19/2005 8:05:28 AM   
Prunesquallor


Posts: 181
Joined: 10/12/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2

No- but it means that if the slave is making a mistake, he or she has accepted that the master can correct the slave, in whatever way they find appropriate.

Sometimes, cutting them off and hurting their feelings just a bit is the perfect way to send a good message and teach a good lesson. This isn't about all fuzzy yummies.

Of course a master can be kind and sweet and giving and polite, but learning and growing and training isn't always soft and sweet.



I agree, but I didn't see anything in the first posting to suggest that the sub had made a mistake.

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/19/2005 8:34:00 AM   
EmeraldSlave2


Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Prunesquallor
I agree, but I didn't see anything in the first posting to suggest that the sub had made a mistake.

Who is to judge? There's nothing in the first post suggesting much of anything other than asking "Would you cut your slave off if she was attempting to thank you?"

My answer is yes- there are tons of reasons I'd cut a slave off, whatever they might be trying to do. And I don't consider that rude or wrong.

(in reply to Prunesquallor)
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RE: Thanking a Master/Dom - 10/19/2005 8:56:15 AM   
darkinshadows


Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
Status: offline
quote:

if your sub/slave was trying to thank you for a priviledge or gift you had allowed her would you dismiss her during her thanks w/out waiting to hear it, by saying," if you say another word something bad will happen"(ie punishment)?


A Master has every right to do such and has right to punih if the sub/slave disobeys.

quote:

Is doing so perhaps damaging to her psyche or the relationship?Or is that an acceptable practice to dismiss during a time when a 'thank you 'should come about?


There is a bigger issue to be concerned about than the psyche - as in, why would a sub/slave feel damaged by such action?

quote:

and on the other side of the coin...
Subs/Slaves how would you feel if something similiar had happened to you?


I would see a lesson and something to learn about. He is teaching and under submission, I should grow.

quote:

Would you feel slighted or hurt?


No.

quote:

Or what if it was someone that you were just being considered by would you continue with getting to know that person or move on?


No. For He is setting the bounderies of the relationship. I would do as told, then, when allowed a question session, I may ask about it, but its really a non issue for myself.

quote:

Would be be worse for you if it was your Master?


No.

Peace and Love

_____________________________
.dark.



...i surrender to gravity and the unknown...

(in reply to fyreredsub)
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