Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than "D"?


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than "D"? Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 5:08:25 PM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: OldBastardly1
I have seen many people that are severely afflicted by a condition called TME.....Too Much Education. Sadly, education does NOT indicate an equal amount of intelligence.

Many have probably seen the "Jaywalking" segments on the Tonight Show, where Jay Leno goes to college campuses, asks college students simple questions, and they are clueless.

There was a study done a few years ago, where pollsters went from campus to campus, asking simple, "fifth-grade"-type questions.  At state universities, most of the students got the answers wrong, often saying they had no idea.  At Ivy League schools, however, the students answered the pollsters clearly and distinctly, explaining exactly what the answer was and why.  But -- they got the answer wrong just as often as the state school students.  Only the marketing was different.


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to OldBastardly1)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 5:10:13 PM   
petitespitfire64


Posts: 182
Joined: 10/4/2007
Status: offline
To submit...I must have a HIGH level of respect for a man. This respect stems from many qualities he shows..integrity, honesty, kindness, self esteem, etc. Intelligence is one of the things I look for most. He doesn't have to be smarter than me at EVERYTHING... but he'd have to be able to hold his own.
I had one of those mechanical geniuses who could barely read and who I had to explain words to. Got rid of THAT one.


_____________________________

**Daneene**
"The right thing to do isn't always the popular thing to do"

(in reply to hejira92)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 5:20:23 PM   
lronitulstahp


Posts: 5392
Joined: 10/17/2007
Status: offline
         Hmmm..are we talking a very smart, worldly sub, and a slightly illiterate D-type?  Probably not....
       But for people with a bit less of a difference between the levels of intelligence, it should be workable.  In order for it to work, the D-type would have to be self-assured, strong, and comfortable with themselves and their abilities as a Dominant figure...oops, i just described what i would expect in a Dom regardless of how smart i find them.

(in reply to atljerbear35)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 5:26:34 PM   
DesFIP


Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline
I'm smarter in some areas, dumber in others. I've had more travel in Europe, he's traveled more in Asia.

I'm more worldly than almost anyone I know, comes with the background I have.

None of which matters to me. I'm not looking for someone who looks down at me all the time, always telling me how stupid I am in comparison. I've got enough self esteem issues that being nothing in comparison to his high-and-mightiness is not what is good for me.

What mattered to me is his moral and ethical compass. And that he isn't insecure in the areas he is inexperienced in. But that he's willing to learn, even from me. As I am willing to learn from him.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!


(in reply to tolovetolaugh)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 5:27:37 PM   
SoulPiercer


Posts: 374
Joined: 5/27/2007
Status: offline
"I am generally smarter then most of the men I meet."

I never attended a day of college. If you spoke to me, you would never know it, unless I told you.

I work with people who have 4-12 years college, earn $20k to $40k more THAN I do, yet they do not KNOW the difference between your, you're and yore, no and know, there, their or they're and of course then and than .. as illustrated above.

I think the relationship can work fine, as long as the s-type doesn't decide that because they have a higher education, it somehow makes them better THAN the d-type. After all, as a d-type myself, it certainly never occurred to me that I am better than s-types simply because I hold the whip.

_____________________________

Do you have any idea how many bones you have left for me to break? - Batman

(in reply to hejira92)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 5:30:16 PM   
lronitulstahp


Posts: 5392
Joined: 10/17/2007
Status: offline
quote:

  I think the relationship can work fine, as long as the s-type doesn't decide that because they have a higher education, it somehow makes them better THAN the d-type. After all, as a d-type myself, it certainly never occurred to me that I am better than s-types simply because I hold the whip.

 That's a really good way of looking at it...i feel smarter after reading that

(in reply to SoulPiercer)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 5:33:36 PM   
FlamingRedhead


Posts: 451
Joined: 3/4/2007
From: Georgia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: atljerbear35

What if you are smarter, more worldly, or just far better educated than your Dom/me or One that you are considering applying to?  Can such a relationship work, or even be worth exploring? Can TPE even be a legitimate option if such is the case?


I have a vocational college education and have yet to travel the world.  I like to think I have above-average intelligence, though.  At least, that's what the last IQ test I took said...ppfftt
 
Soooo....to answer your question....NO....not for me, anyway.  If I can constantly outsmart him, I will quickly lose respect for him.  He can't be my dominant if I'm pulling the strings.

_____________________________

I'm so addicted to
All the things you do
When you're going down on me
In between the sheets
Or the sound you make
With every breath you take
It's unlike anything
When you're loving me

(in reply to atljerbear35)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 5:36:40 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
Grammar is education and the desire to remember it, not intelligence. Ability to remember things also has little to do with intelligence. I personally favor the idea that the real point of education is not knowing everything, but knowing how to find it and use it effectively. I can't tell you the rules for any citation or paper formating at this moment, but I can tell you how to find it and, having found it, I can use it quite well as I have done many times.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 5/6/2008 5:40:13 PM >


_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to SoulPiercer)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 5:52:33 PM   
Quivver


Posts: 1953
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline
Short term?  not a problem. 
Long term I believe problems would crop up.  If the Indian has better sense then the Cheif that tribe is doomed. 


_____________________________

The problem with communication ... is the illusion that it has been accomplished. ~George Bernard Shaw

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 6:11:31 PM   
CelticPrince


Posts: 3613
Joined: 4/15/2005
Status: offline
quote:

This is really aimed at the subs, but A/all feedback is welcome.
We all come to this lifestyle from different backgrounds, professions, and even educations- and I'm wondering if other subs have encountered or dealt with this problem- What if you are smarter, more worldly, or just far better educated than your Dom/me or One that you are considering applying to? Can such a relationship work, or even be worth exploring? Can TPE even be a legitimate option if such is the case?


bear,

It may work if the relationship is sex based, but if there is a power factor to be considered, In my opinion it will ultimately fail.

CP

(in reply to atljerbear35)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 6:16:27 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Quivver

If the Indian has better sense then the Cheif that tribe is doomed. 


I'd agree with that in a sense, I think most wise rulers have known when to take the advice of those more intelligent, insightful or educated on the subject at hand. Problems in any relationship will arise when one partner doesn't have the sense to listen when it's important. Being able to control effectively is not always being the smartest, but being best able to use your resources - whatever they are.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Quivver)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 6:31:00 PM   
DominantJenny


Posts: 645
Joined: 4/6/2008
Status: offline
*nods at AquaticSub* And one of a dominant's resources is her or his submissive.
As it happens, I am much smarter/more intellectual than my slave, and, in a great many ways, much more worldly. However, he has social skills that most people only dream of.
But perhaps the best example is this: I'm cautious, he's a risk-taker. As the one who makes the final decisions, I could deny him every risk he wants to take. But I don't. I've learned over the years to trust his instincts more often than not when it comes to taking a risk, and rarely have we made an error, and many of those risks have paid off big. At the same time, he's learned to appreciate my caution, which has prevented us some burns along the way.
Very little is black and white, and this certainly isn't one of those things.

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 6:52:28 PM   
pinkwind


Posts: 367
Joined: 1/9/2005
Status: offline
Our compatibility comes from a multitude of different elements that we have each brought into our relationship and which, for the most part, compliment rather than mirror each others life experiences, be it academic achievements, professional accomplishments, upbringing, social mores, personal morality or just differing life experiences in general.

Master Andy is more practical, whereas i am more intellectual, but both have needed to be cerebral beings in our own fields, analytical to differing degrees, me probably more emotional.

Bringing our different life experiences into one entity has given us both so much more to learn about each other, so much more to hold our interest in how we work so well as a D/s, M/s couple, and has helped form a very unique partnership.

Pure academic achievements have been in totally different fields and because of that there is little to be gained from oneupmanship about which one of us reached the highest levels of education. Our disciplines were as different as chalk and cheese, after all.

What has made our relationship work is that it isn't a style adopted, just life lived together for the fulfillment of both, and that we have not let apathy set in and gnaw away at it's foundations. That's where the intelligence comes in.



(in reply to atljerbear35)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 7:07:13 PM   
Evility


Posts: 915
Joined: 12/19/2007
Status: offline
Can any relationship work with that sort of disparity?

(in reply to atljerbear35)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 7:08:40 PM   
lusciouslips19


Posts: 9792
Joined: 9/8/2007
Status: offline
It wouldnt work for me. I need to be challenged by my Sir.

With that being said, they dont have to be more educated than me. They do have to be my intellectual equal or superior. b

< Message edited by lusciouslips19 -- 5/6/2008 7:15:52 PM >


_____________________________

Original Pimpette,
Keeper of Original Home Flag and Fire of Mr. Lance Hughes
Charter member of Lance's Fag Hags,
Member of the Subbie Mafia
Princess of typos and it's my prerogative

(in reply to Evility)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 7:17:47 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: atljerbear35
What if you are smarter, more worldly, or just far better educated than your Dom/me or One that you are considering applying to?  Can such a relationship work, or even be worth exploring? Can TPE even be a legitimate option if such is the case?

Whether or not this can work depends alot on the attitude of the Dom/me in the situation. If they are done learning, have no intention of becoming more worldly or better educated then it might cause a problem. If they are not willing to learn, from life and from their sub, there might be issues.
Not everyone is going to be equal, but they do need to be compatible. If the D type is happy with what they know, can hold a good enough job to support themselves and can carry on a decent conversation, it shouldnt matter what piece of paper they hold giving them accredation. However, if they are ignorant, unwiling to expand themselves and sheltered,  I cant see it happening becasue to control someone you have to learn with them, about them and gain knowledge in how to do that.

DV


_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to atljerbear35)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 7:38:37 PM   
Leatherist


Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline
There is a distinct difference between education and wisdom.

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 7:46:08 PM   
OldBastardly1


Posts: 651
Joined: 7/22/2006
From: Atlanta, GA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

There is a distinct difference between education and wisdom.

Absolutely. Education and wisdom. Education and intelligence. Education and common sense.

_____________________________

Old Bastard

"You cannot make footprints in the sands of time if you're sitting on your butt. And who wants to make buttprints in the sands of time?" -- Bob Moawad



(in reply to Leatherist)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 7:51:00 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline
I disagree. I believe education and wisdom are very related. I do not, however, believe tha a school is the only place you get an education. We learn constantly, or at least we should. Wisdom does not happen on its own, you have to learn before you can become wise.
I didnt sat book smarts. I said Educated. There are things you will never learn in school. You learn on the job, you learn from friends, and family, and even enemies. But you are always being educated, unless you stop trying to learn.

My humble opinion of course
DV


_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to OldBastardly1)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than &quo... - 5/6/2008 7:54:25 PM   
stella41b


Posts: 4258
Joined: 10/16/2007
From: SW London (UK)
Status: offline
Developing a harmonious, loving relationship with your own child or being able to program a network of computers - which is more valuable to society?

And how do you measure intellect or wolrdliness? A college degree? A doctorate? I don't have any of these things, I have never graduated anywhere in my life apart from school and night school, and I don't think I need them either.

Maybe I see things differently, but I don't compare and contrast myself with potential partners but I see two people joined together as a unit, a team, Dominant and submissive, which together have both strengths and weaknesses, virtues and faults, baggage, pasts, issues, and everything else which makes people human and it's sort of held together by some sort of emotional connection which often grows and develops, sometimes stagnates, but while it exists it defines the relationship.

_____________________________

CM's Resident Lyricist
also Facebook
http://stella.baker.tripod.com/
50NZpoints
Q2
Simply Q

(in reply to pinkwind)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive >> RE: Does D/s work if "s" is smarter than "D"? Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094