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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/7/2008 10:39:30 PM

Asherdelampyr

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I just got a funny image of you in a pink sundress cleaning a toilet, thanks for that, I needed the laugh!

also, what you say makes sense, therefore, it must be wrong :P

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/7/2008 10:46:09 PM

Saffleur

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That's rather rediculous. Nuture is a word that covers a broad spectrum of things. Infact, training a slave is nurturing them. So it defeats the whole purpose of Mastering a woman. It becomes a rhetorical question because to nuture is to help grow and to help grow into the depths of what a slave can and should be.

If a person discredits a man for nuturing their slave then they are ignorant to the definition of the word itself and being narrowminded to the point of laughability. Crack open a dictionary folks. Just because a word sounds "soft" doesn't mean it is.

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/7/2008 11:12:58 PM

ownedgirlie

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Some do, some don't. It's not a requirement, in either direction.

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 2:05:06 AM

HeavansKeeper

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<QR>

The right answer is the least interesting:

Depending on the terms of the relationship, yes and no. In a very pure, hardcore, TPE, slave = object PERIOD relationship, a slave owner (master) would not HAVE to do anything. True, it would be negligent, but he is free to be negligent with his property.

I've never seen such a relationship exist. Most people can't help but get cuddly. My Pet considers me her master, and I nurture her a great deal. In fact, I nurture more than I humiliate, use, and degrade her.

Boring, P/C, and correct.

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 3:26:02 AM

RavenMuse

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Masters can't nurture? Did I miss the memo?

Total and utter codswallop! I am most certainly NOT the only Master who has both a TPE Dynamic and a strong element of DaddyDom thrown in the mix (And that isn't the only way nirturing can express itself within a Dynamic, just the way it does so in O/ours!)

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 3:44:25 AM

gypsygrl

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quote:

You've become aware of a perspective?

You are so right. That phrasing is terrible and I troubled over it for a little while. Its in the passive voice and sounds totally bureaucratic.

But, I did come accross it laid out very boldly reading web pages. Then I started "sensing" it lurking all over the place as a hidden premise. I'm not sure if that was because I had just become sensitized to that particular point of view so was reading too much into things, or because it really is a common point of view and I just hadn't noticed before. So, I decided the passive phrasing isn't all that off the mark and I decided to keep it.

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 3:49:00 AM

gypsygrl

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quote:

The "mastercard" thing was very good.

Thank you, but I have to credit my former for that one. "Pulling out the mastercard" is a phrase we used to refer to giving the sort of order that can't be refused. Its a really cool phrase. :)

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 3:55:13 AM

gypsygrl

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quote:

I don't know if I would refer to myself (or if anyone else would refer to myself) as nurturing - as most of the time I will not go out of my way to fix a casual date's problems...only to mop up what I've done.

I wouldn't call that nurturing, just responsible. :) I mean, I think its a good idea to clean up after ourselves and not leave any messes, just in a general sense. But, in my mind, an M/s relationship is very different from a casual relationship and implies some level of committment from both sides of the slash.

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 5:34:06 AM

MasterFireMaam

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Ok, I rarely say things like this, but....that's just dumb. Some relationships where there isn't nurturing exist and work. But to say that we CAN'T...yeah, that's dumb.

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 6:20:14 AM

happypervert

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quote:

The thing is it boils down to how one views their responsibility that comes with ownership. I really like to use the word stewardship when I talk about these responsibilities.

I'll put a somewhat cynical spin on this, and say that nurturing can be a tool in a master's bag of tricks that is used to keep a submissive's desire to submit strong. Eliminate it, and plenty of submissives will simply walk away to greener pastures.

So I think anyone claiming that masters can't nurture is just being simpleminded -- they should at least appreciate nurturing as a purely manipulative tactic.

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 9:27:50 AM

FRSguy

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I do a hell of a lot of nurturing for someone that cant do it...LOL.
Its my responsibility to protect my girl emotionaly and otherwise. Part of that is nurturing. If I didnt do that somehow I think calling her fuckmeat just wouldnt have the same meaning.

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 9:45:33 AM

Dnomyar

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Will nurturing cut into my fishing time??

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 10:00:34 AM

gypsygrl

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quote:

I'll put a somewhat cynical spin on this, and say that nurturing can be a tool in a master's bag of tricks that is used to keep a submissive's desire to submit strong. Eliminate it, and plenty of submissives will simply walk away to greener pastures.

So I think anyone claiming that masters can't nurture is just being simpleminded -- they should at least appreciate nurturing as a purely manipulative tactic.

Yes! With this frame of mind its possible to be nurturing and a manly man at the same time!

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 10:03:25 AM

gypsygrl

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quote:

Will nurturing cut into my fishing time??

Not if you take your slave fishing with you. Duh. I mean, do you want to be carrying the tackle box and worms yourself? And the cooler? Coolers get heavy, having a pack slave along with you on your fishing trip would be a benefit.

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 10:11:26 AM

amayos

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quote:

ORIGINAL: gypsygrl

I've recently become aware of a perspective on M/s that says that Masters don't nurture. Ever. This strikes me as counter intuitive, but I'd like to hear a range of thoughts on the matter.

Are Mastery and nurturance mutually exclusive categories?
Does a Master lose his or her mastercard if he gets caught nurturing his or her slave?

The idea that males—dominant or otherwise—cannot or do not nurture is simply misandrist drivel. It's just as foolish as saying a father cannot nurture a child. Are all males good nurturers? Certainly not. It doesn't take someone with extraordinary observational skills to see this. Are all fathers good dads? Nay, but then again, not all mothers are good mothers, either.

Nurture and dominance often fit well together, from what I've seen and experienced. In many ways, to nurture is to teach, to encourage, shape and even discipline. I can't imagine how nurture and dominance could possibly be at odds with each other. I will say that nurture isn't a requirement in dominance, however. That's where many go wrong in their thinking, I imagine.

< Message edited by amayos -- 5/8/2008 10:13:30 AM >

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 10:13:10 AM

sambamanslilgirl

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imo, it doesn't make Daddy less of a dominant because He chooses to nurture me. it's one of the many things He does as a DaddyDom.

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 10:13:43 AM

gypsygrl

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quote:

Makes me feel safer and more nurtured than I ever have in my life...

I'm not sure why this led me along the specific tangent it did, but when I read it I thought that even if the Master didn't do a lot of direct nurturing---the sort of stuff you decribe in your post--I think for a slave, just being in a specific relationship could be a form of nurturing if it provided what the slave needed. I mean, its hard for me to imagine a Master not doing some form of nurturing, either direct or indirect, if the relationship is worth having. Even if the only reason the Master is doing it is to keep the slave coming back (see HappyPervert's comment) it would seem that some nurturing is inevitable.

I'm pretty close to concluding that Masters have to do some form of nurturing otherwise there'd be no relationship. lol

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 10:23:50 AM

gypsygrl

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quote:

I will say that nurture isn't a requirement in dominance, however. That's where many go wrong in their thinking, I imagine.

I agree, but I was talking specifically about Master/slave relationships which I take to involve some kind of committment. Its entirely possible to dominate someone without nurturing them, and historically I think thats a very common form of domination particularly where labor is plentiful.

But, can you have a committed M/s relationship without any nurturance? At the very minimum, slavishness would have to be maintained, and that would seem to require nurturing, in some form.

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 10:25:14 AM

Leatherist

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RE: Masters can't nurture? - 5/8/2008 10:30:13 AM

ownedgirlie

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quote:

ORIGINAL: amayos
Nurture and dominance often fit well together, from what I've seen and experienced. In many ways, to nurture is to teach, to encourage, shape and even discipline.

This is a view I lacked seeing for a long time. I equated "nurture" with "affection" - not necessarily the same but in the same family. But when I think about it, nurture means to grow, to develop, to feed... And all these things you mentioned fit into that. Somehow though, when I have thought of someone who is nurturing, I thought only of the element of gentle loving and affection. But to think that way is incomplete thinking.

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