Can someone explain please? (Full Version)

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EagerToPleaseYou -> Can someone explain please? (5/10/2008 10:41:50 PM)

I just recently received a training collar from a new Dom. I am assuming that he has accepted the responsibility of training me and that at some point he will decide whether he'd like to own me. My question is: What is the difference between being under consideration and being in training? Are they the same?

Any help would be appreciated. I pretty new to all of this and don't have all of the jargon down [:)] 



mbes -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/10/2008 10:50:14 PM)

Shouldn't you ask him what it all means? I don't think I'd assume much at all.
People here don't agree on any definitions, I can't think why they'd know what he meant?
In the meantime, I hope you're also deciding whether he's the one you'd like to have in your life.



Focus50 -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/10/2008 11:00:55 PM)

"Under consideration" is bullshit used by some for impressing naive lifestyle newbies with their take charge domliness.  Fact is in any relationship, *BOTH* parties get to decide if they wanna be together - assuming both parties are mature adults....
 
Training is where I teach my girl all the little things that please me - for eg, how to address me, when to speak and when not to, how to take direction in general, the consequences of not doing as directed, how I like her groomed (for eg, I *hate* shaved pussy - but I don't like rampant bush, either) and on it goes....  Since it can take months or more to learn, I don't waste my time on fruitless online relationships - it hasta be real time and she hasta be MY girl, ie, we're in a relationship together....
 
Have you actually met your "new Dom" real life?  BTW, training is a little like the lifestyle "jargon"; the more you familiarise, the easier it gets....
 
Focus.



FangsNfeet -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/10/2008 11:03:43 PM)

In most cases

Under Consideration means that you and another are talking and getting ready to hook up to see what happens. You're both interested in each other and want to see where it can go.

Being In Training means that the two of you have hooked up and are in the physical act of the things you talked about. You where considered to be trained, and now, you are being trained.

That's how I call it. However, it's more important for you to ask the dom you're being trained by what it all means to him.



EagerToPleaseYou -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/10/2008 11:18:38 PM)

You guys are great! Thank you so much. I met this man through a vanilla site and then found out that he is an experienced Dom. It was a dream come true for me because I like him very much and I have always wanted to really explore this lifestyle. He is a good man in his vanilla life and does have another sub. I trust him.

I just didn't want to appear completely ignorant in front of him! I've been doing a lot of reading and still hadn't figured out the difference between the whole consideration thing and a training collar. I appreciate your opinions!

[8|] [:D]



mbes -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/10/2008 11:30:59 PM)

So you're good with the poly thing? Good for you, and even better that you are going into it with your eyes open. [:)]
The two terms have a myriad of meanings, there really are only two people who can know the answer--- you and your partner.
Oh, and just to warn you, be careful of asking the difference between a sub and a slave, that one can get interesting! [:D]



kinkypuppy2 -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/11/2008 12:49:10 AM)

Think of the difference between a wedding band and an engagement ring.



EagerToPleaseYou -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/11/2008 1:01:23 AM)

Thank you kinkypuppy! That's kind of a sweet way to put it . . .

[:D]



antipode -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/11/2008 2:28:31 AM)

I don't really know, I operate under the assumption that "under consideration" is mostly used by people who spend too much time on the internet, the insecure chappies that think they become Whole Males by using titles like "Sir" and "Master" in their alias, and obese women with words like "cute" and "little" in their aliases.



batshalom -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/11/2008 4:48:46 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

I *hate* shaved pussy - but I don't like rampant bush, either


~hooting with laughter~ Thanks, Focus.



CelticPrince -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/11/2008 5:27:16 AM)

quote:

Any help would be appreciated. I pretty new to all of this and don't have all of the jargon down <http://www.collarchat.com/image/s1.gif>



eager,

I just checked you profile // just looking????///

Seems you another that just jumps in without taking time to learn first. Ther are many in your group, that commit to something and then want answers. Your question shoukd go to your "Training Dominant"

Good Luck.

CP



SeeksOnlyOne -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/11/2008 5:43:06 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: EagerToPleaseYou

I just recently received a training collar from a new Dom. I am assuming that he has accepted the responsibility of training me and that at some point he will decide whether he'd like to own me. My question is: What is the difference between being under consideration and being in training? Are they the same?

Any help would be appreciated. I pretty new to all of this and don't have all of the jargon down [:)] 



havent read any of the replies, but seems to me these questions should have been answered by him before you took a collar......im sure things have different meanings to different folks, so only his answers really matter...



KatyLied -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/11/2008 6:26:56 AM)

quote:

but seems to me these questions should have been answered by him before you took a collar


I have to agree.  It's best not to accept the sort of relationship that requires you to receive input from a group of strangers in order to understand what is going on.



Bound2One -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/11/2008 6:33:17 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: EagerToPleaseYou

I just didn't want to appear completely ignorant in front of him! I've been doing a lot of reading and still hadn't figured out the difference between the whole consideration thing and a training collar. I appreciate your opinions!


You're new, so he should expect that you have *tons* of questions.  No question is an ignorant one.  Ask him what it means.  You may be thinking one thing, and he's on a completely different page.  He may think it means something completely different than what anyone here has said.  Keep reading and gathering opinions, by all means, but be sure to turn to him with the questions - he is your guide, and it can lead to lovely conversations with him. 



Madame4a -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/11/2008 6:54:39 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: EagerToPleaseYou

I just recently received a training collar from a new Dom. I am assuming that he has accepted the responsibility of training me and that at some point he will decide whether he'd like to own me. My question is: What is the difference between being under consideration and being in training? Are they the same?

Any help would be appreciated. I pretty new to all of this and don't have all of the jargon down [:)] 



Don't assume anything, just because someone gives you a collar doesn't mean you can't ask what their responsibility to YOU is... goodness, sometimes I think people leave their brains at the door the minute the word 'collar' is mentioned.

and if you don't know what those things mean, ask HIM... because you'll get a different definition for each person you ask...

personally, I don't use all that stuff.. training, consideration.. blah blah blah... I collar you or I don't --- thing is, its going to take a really long time for me to put a collar around someone's neck and they will know exactly what it means




Maya2001 -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/11/2008 6:55:54 AM)

Here is an article you should read as well  -->  sub frenzy 



DarkSteven -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/11/2008 7:14:04 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: EagerToPleaseYou


I just didn't want to appear completely ignorant in front of him! I've been doing a lot of reading and still hadn't figured out the difference between the whole consideration thing and a training collar. I appreciate your opinions!

[8|] [:D]

Actually, if you're wearing His training collar, it signifies that He has accepted the responsibility of teaching you.  Let Him do so.




SimplyMichael -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/11/2008 7:35:43 AM)

Considering he hasn't told you then it they both mean "give me lots of sex in whatever form is available and I will hold out the next collar as the prize for swallowing this load of horseshit"

You are in Arizona, home to APEX one of the larger bdsm groups
http://www.arizonapowerexchange.org/index1.htm



IronBear -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/11/2008 8:45:35 AM)

I'm not going to get hard nosed and stiff assed and rubbish what others do. each Dominant has his or her own dynamic Some prefer the Collar of Consideration which is a time where both parties assess each other as part of the decision making process leading up to a Full Collar. I've found that this is where at least some training takes place as a part of the process. Some use this period to bring the sub/slave up to speed on the basics of what is required.

I prefer to have a Probationary Collar which is precisely what it sounds like, the slave is on probation (as we are too) and here I train in all the basics and genaeral areas I require. If she is awarded a House Collar then some of the advanced stuff like serving a table and guests on a formal occasion (including Silver Service) is done. The Probationary also serves to assess where she is best suited as far as a servant goes and what other areas she may be of use (sexual and/or BDSM).

Iron Bear
Master of Bruin Cottage
(A Victorian Lifestyle poly home)

"I judge a Man by what I see him do and not by what others tell me he does." (Captain Sir Edward Pellew of the HMS Indefatigable to Midshipman Hornblower ~ C.S. Forrester)




Justme696 -> RE: Can someone explain please? (5/11/2008 12:13:00 PM)

Ask him as suggested above...and skip the posts that say that all people who use "under consideration" are bad or wannebees. (no, I don't use it)
It is the sub/slave who accepts the "under concideration"also, so why judge so harsh about the Owner.



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