Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Letting it go !?!


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Letting it go !?! Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/19/2008 2:13:10 PM   
Lynnxz


Posts: 4813
Joined: 10/3/2006
From: Atlanta
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dnomyar

Mmmmm miss how about letting me hook up a tens unit to that metal stud.


I had the brilliant idea to lick a tens unit probe with two tongue rings in. Was all kinds of eye opening....

Anyway, I don't think he could be worth this much stress. :( At any rate, the ball is in his court now and now you can move on and go get your tongue pierced.

*Offers you a smoothie*



_____________________________

HBIC



(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/19/2008 2:52:50 PM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline 		Thank you owner4sexslave. I love all my piercings, brought forward the tongue one, going tomorrow.
 
Thanks Lynnxz, im pretty sure ill need something cold tomorrow for my tongue.


_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to Lynnxz)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/19/2008 3:06:42 PM   
kiwisub12


Posts: 4742
Joined: 1/11/2006
Status: offline 		Shoot - i hate all this drama for you. Like you , i try to think the best of everyone - but this one isn't looking good.
Having perved your profile, i cannot understand why he is doing (or not doing) this, when common courtesy would dictate a simple " i changed my mind, sorry".
Hope he calls or emails you . hugs.

(in reply to missturbation)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/19/2008 4:29:12 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation
Thank you, i've taken your advice and done just that. My addled brain at present is just not capable of that kind of clear thinking to get to a course of action that makes sense.


That's certainly understandable. There's truth in the saying, "Can't see the forest for the trees." Sometimes, we're just too close to see.

*hugs*

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to missturbation)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/19/2008 7:55:55 PM   
ProlificNeeds


Posts: 1061
Joined: 5/19/2007
Status: offline 		Car accidents, unidentified emergencies, favorite aunts half way across the country dying... doesn't matter. Lie or truth, if they wanted your company or to communicate, they would.
I'd say just get over this fellow who can't hold the communication hot-potato and move along. Sounds pretty far fetched to me, did his car send him into anaphylactic shock?

You deserve someone who wants to talk to you, not someone you have to hound for a reply.

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/19/2008 8:42:38 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline 		Dear Miss...I understand where you are coming from.You dont wish to think negatively of him on the off chance he is telling the truth, you want to trust in the fact that he is who you thought he was..IMO..Master Fire Maam gave excellent advice. This way you are not attacking someone who possibly is legit with the events. But you are also not sitting stewing and wondering, thus the ball is in his court so to speak...I wish you well...Tempting

_____________________________

I have greatly enjoyed the second blooming...suddenly you find at the age of 50, that a whole new life has opened before you.........Agatha Christie.

You must make tracks into the unknown~~Thoreau

(in reply to ProlificNeeds)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/20/2008 5:24:11 AM   
MissLily


Posts: 146
Joined: 8/19/2007
Status: offline 		OP, I think you're giving that person too much respect.

I've been reading both threads and the thing that kept popping into My mind was: next, he's going to have his friend tell her that he's dead. You know? Those who fake their deaths in order to avoid confrontation?

Sure, all his stories could be true, but they could be lies too. I think you've done your share of efforts. Now it's his turn.

For My part, I just think he's ignoring you and all he said was untrue. If he shows up again, please take what he said with a grain of salt. From what I read, he's a wanker and a coward. If he shows up again, and sweet talk you into a relationship again, I'm pretty sure this will happen all over again.

Lack of closure is really very hard, I know. It hurts like Hell. But as time passes, it WILL get better, and you'll come to see things more clearly.

My advice is for you to sit tight. Stop contacting him, you're obviously waisting your time. If he wants to talk to you again, he will.

Stop feeding this relationship, it's keeping you from thinking clearly. With a little time, you're head will clear and you might just see the red flags more clearly.

And just repeat to yourself over and over again that all this has NOTHING to do with you. He didn,t do all this because of you. He did this because of his own motivations. The person he was doing it with could have been anybody.

Take good care of yourself, you've been through enough lately.
Miss Lily

(in reply to missturbation)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/20/2008 5:31:44 AM   
Aynne


Posts: 740
Joined: 1/25/2008
Status: offline 		Misst,

Sweetie, Lily is right. It sucks so much to go through this, but the guy is a poser, a fake and not honest at all.  You are so much better than that. Chalk it up to learning, move on, and keep your head held high and stop any attmept to contact him. He is not even worthy of that. You are a smart and beautfiul woman, it hurts to be lonely, I know that all to well, but this kind of deceptive mind game hurts worse. Just remember these red flags next time, and don't give your time to anyone not worthy of it, because you are truly worth more than that.
Big hugs .....




quote:

ORIGINAL: MissLily

OP, I think you're giving that person too much respect.

I've been reading both threads and the thing that kept popping into My mind was: next, he's going to have his friend tell her that he's dead. You know? Those who fake their deaths in order to avoid confrontation?

Sure, all his stories could be true, but they could be lies too. I think you've done your share of efforts. Now it's his turn.

For My part, I just think he's ignoring you and all he said was untrue. If he shows up again, please take what he said with a grain of salt. From what I read, he's a wanker and a coward. If he shows up again, and sweet talk you into a relationship again, I'm pretty sure this will happen all over again.

Lack of closure is really very hard, I know. It hurts like Hell. But as time passes, it WILL get better, and you'll come to see things more clearly.

My advice is for you to sit tight. Stop contacting him, you're obviously waisting your time. If he wants to talk to you again, he will.

Stop feeding this relationship, it's keeping you from thinking clearly. With a little time, you're head will clear and you might just see the red flags more clearly.

And just repeat to yourself over and over again that all this has NOTHING to do with you. He didn,t do all this because of you. He did this because of his own motivations. The person he was doing it with could have been anybody.

Take good care of yourself, you've been through enough lately.
Miss Lily


_____________________________

*Yes I know I have no profile at this time...

I looked in your eyes
Without saying a word
I told you what I am
And I hoped that you heard

~Owned and Loved by Master Sifu~

*founder of I Love Lushy Inc.*

(in reply to MissLily)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/20/2008 5:41:34 AM   
Kalista07


Posts: 4240
Joined: 7/1/2007
Status: offline 		Missturbation,
i apologize because i have not read the responses in Your thread yet.... Which is something i almost always do before i respond.  Today, however i am tired, sore, and going to be late for work if i keep reading this...{See how much effort that didn't take?}
Anyway, i want to let You know i have been pretty much where You are at... Sadly, though i was apparently too stupid, or whatever, to see the writing on the wall.... i had met a man through CM and we had not met personally yet. We had made plans to meet in person and then he 'disappeared'.  One of his friends finally contacted me and said, he was in the hospital.....i was still angry and hurt because i don't think it takes more than two seconds to pick up the phone and tell someone what's going on, but okay..........So, he resurfaced and things went forward.  Time came to meet up again and *Poof* he was gone.......  A while later his friend contacted me again..... And said had i heard from him, was he with me no one had heard from him in weeks.  Then his friend's slave contacted me to find out some information.............And eventually the friend contacted me to tell me he had been walking to the store after getting off the phone with me, and he was hit by a drunk driver....... He was in the hospital.  Eventually, the friend contacted me again and said he died. i was devastated...Too make things worse the friend began to  persue me and told me things like "He wanted to marry You".... and "His brother wants to talk to You since You were such an important part of his life".  Bottom line?? The 'friend'? Yeah, it was him......  Color me stupid apparently...
Anyway, i just wanted to let You know that if You need anything or want to talk i'm generally around.
Kali


_____________________________

“Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I really need it.”
~~Sweedish Proverb


(in reply to missturbation)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/20/2008 5:42:25 AM   
cjan


Posts: 3513
Joined: 2/21/2008
Status: offline 		Ditto what Aynne and a lot of peeps have said, misst.

If I was in a car wreck or whatever on my way to see someone I was interested in, nothing short of being in a coma would stop me from contacting her. And, apparently, he's not comatose.


_____________________________

"I never saw a wild thing sorry for itself. A bird will fall ,frozen , dead, from a bough without ever having felt sorry for itself."- D.H. L

" When you look into the abyss, the abyss also looks in to you"- Frank Nitti



(in reply to Aynne)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/20/2008 5:45:25 AM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: kiwisub12

Shoot - i hate all this drama for you. Like you , i try to think the best of everyone - but this one isn't looking good.
Having perved your profile, i cannot understand why he is doing (or not doing) this, when common courtesy would dictate a simple " i changed my mind, sorry".
Hope he calls or emails you . hugs.


Thank you hun, im just at the point now where all i want is an 'im ok'. Not much to ask for i dont think.
 
quote:

That's certainly understandable. There's truth in the saying, "Can't see the forest for the trees." Sometimes, we're just too close to see.

*hugs*

Master Fire

There certainly is. Thanks for your help, i feel calmer about it all now.
 
quote:

You deserve someone who wants to talk to you, not someone you have to hound for a reply.

My hounding days are done lol.
I sent my final piece of communication yesterday, the balls in his court now.
 
quote:

Dear Miss...I understand where you are coming from.You dont wish to think negatively of him on the off chance he is telling the truth, you want to trust in the fact that he is who you thought he was..

Other than recent turn of events i have had no reason to doubt his word. We have spoken off and on for about 12 months. Im 50 / 50 at the moment but i have followed master fires advice so we'll see what happens.
 
Thank you miss lily and Aynne, i really appreciate your words x
 
 




_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to kiwisub12)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/20/2008 5:54:58 AM   
NorthernGent


Posts: 8730
Joined: 7/10/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

So why? 
 


Where a man's heart is in it, he'll make the effort.

A lack of effort = his heart isn't in it = time to say goodbye.

_____________________________

I have the courage to be a coward - but not beyond my limits.

Sooner or later, the man who wins is the man who thinks he can.

(in reply to missturbation)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/20/2008 6:05:13 AM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline
quote:

Bottom line?? The 'friend'? Yeah, it was him......  Color me stupid apparently...
Anyway, i just wanted to let You know that if You need anything or want to talk i'm generally around.
Kali


God, thats awful. I'm sorry you had to go through that.
Fingers crossed this doesn't get that bad.
However i did look at the friends messages really carefully because the guy in question is a terrible speller and i mean baaaaaaaaad and none of the usual spelling mistakes were there. But then again maybe he was just sat with a dictionary next to him lol. See how paranoid does this situation wanna get me? Thankyou for the offer of a chat, im pretty sure ill take you up on that. xx
 
quote:

If I was in a car wreck or whatever on my way to see someone I was interested in, nothing short of being in a coma would stop me from contacting her. And, apparently, he's not comatose.

I really don't think i have ever had that kind of devotion from a man, how sad is that?
 
quote:

A lack of effort = his heart isn't in it = time to say goodbye.

I did kind of

Right time to go get my tongue pierced  







_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to Kalista07)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/20/2008 6:54:03 AM   
cjan


Posts: 3513
Joined: 2/21/2008
Status: offline
quote:

quote:

If I was in a car wreck or whatever on my way to see someone I was interested in, nothing short of being in a coma would stop me from contacting her. And, apparently, he's not comatose.

I really don't think i have ever had that kind of devotion from a man, how sad is that?


That's not devotion, misst. Devotion comes later and is much deeper. What I'm talking about is  concern for the other person, for one thing, to make sure she doesn't have to go through what you have been going through in this instance.


_____________________________

"I never saw a wild thing sorry for itself. A bird will fall ,frozen , dead, from a bough without ever having felt sorry for itself."- D.H. L

" When you look into the abyss, the abyss also looks in to you"- Frank Nitti



(in reply to missturbation)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/20/2008 7:09:01 AM   
subtee


Posts: 5133
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline 		~FR

Lovely Miss...

May I ask you, is this attractive to you? Down to brass tacks, is the way that he is behaving--even if it is all true--is it interesting, alluring? Is the mystery intoxicating or is it the man? If it is the man, why? What is compelling about him in terms of his actions (or lack thereof) since you have decided to meet? I'm not suggesting anything but that you think (and it's only a suggestion), about what is attractive, interesting, sexy, desirous to you.

Reason and passion are two sides of a coin. Passion without reason will burn to destruction.

Hugs



_____________________________

Don't believe everything you think...

(in reply to missturbation)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/20/2008 7:31:30 AM   
Andtrinitymakes3


Posts: 1
Joined: 1/27/2008
Status: offline 		I am sorry for your pain...... I am also healing my broken heart. After 3 great weeks with a sub I would have sworn was going to be "The one!"  He has dissapeared. As a Domina I will only ask a few times. Women outnumber the men 10  to 1 on these sights. If a man lets you pass by -  it is his loss! Reset your bait, cast your line, sit back and relax!!!!!

Angel

(in reply to Dnomyar)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/20/2008 10:05:52 AM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cjan

quote:


quote:

If I was in a car wreck or whatever on my way to see someone I was interested in, nothing short of being in a coma would stop me from contacting her. And, apparently, he's not comatose.


I really don't think i have ever had that kind of devotion from a man, how sad is that?


That's not devotion, misst. Devotion comes later and is much deeper. What I'm talking about is  concern for the other person, for one thing, to make sure she doesn't have to go through what you have been going through in this instance.


To me its a form of devotion. The following through on what you started.

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to cjan)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/20/2008 10:10:46 AM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: subtee

~FR

Lovely Miss...

May I ask you, is this attractive to you? Down to brass tacks, is the way that he is behaving--even if it is all true--is it interesting, alluring? Is the mystery intoxicating or is it the man? If it is the man, why? What is compelling about him in terms of his actions (or lack thereof) since you have decided to meet? I'm not suggesting anything but that you think (and it's only a suggestion), about what is attractive, interesting, sexy, desirous to you.

Reason and passion are two sides of a coin. Passion without reason will burn to destruction.

Hugs




First and foremost i would like to know he is ok.
Secondly i would like to just have the closure of 'no i have no intention of meeting you' or 'yes i still have every intention of meeting you.'
Probably no more no less than that.
 

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to subtee)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/20/2008 10:15:09 AM   
NorthernGent


Posts: 8730
Joined: 7/10/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

'yes i still have every intention of meeting you.'



I'd bet a pound to a penny he does, which is why he hasn't closed the door. His intentions are clear though: the door revolves around his life, and will open and close when he's good and ready (possibly at the drop of a hat).

_____________________________

I have the courage to be a coward - but not beyond my limits.

Sooner or later, the man who wins is the man who thinks he can.

(in reply to missturbation)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Letting it go !?! - 5/20/2008 10:31:47 AM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: NorthernGent

quote:

ORIGINAL: missturbation

'yes i still have every intention of meeting you.'



I'd bet a pound to a penny he does, which is why he hasn't closed the door. His intentions are clear though: the door revolves around his life, and will open and close when he's good and ready (possibly at the drop of a hat).


I'll cross that bridge if / when i come to it.
I think it would take a lot of talking and stuff for me to agree to a meet now.

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to NorthernGent)
Profile   Post #: 60
Page:   <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Letting it go !?! Page: <<   < prev  1 2 [3] 4   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.109