How do you know U R submissive? (Full Version)

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takemepleaseme -> How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 7:24:03 PM)

Clearly I am new to this, I have been told I am submissive, but I don't feel that way. I sometimes feel mean and bossy in bed, and I love dirty talk. Can some of you who are experienced in this area give me some insight into what makes a sub and what makes a dom? Can a woman who is independent still be a submissive?




Madame4a -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 7:37:12 PM)

you might do better posting this in Ask a slave/submissive...that said...

don't let anyone else tell you who you are... do some research.. some searchs around here... attend some events, munches and meetings in your local area.. and talk to others... see where/if you might fit in...




SleepyDom -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 7:47:10 PM)

How do I know I am submissive?  Hmmmm. [scratches his head for a while]  Good question, I guess I don't.  Oh wait, I'm not submissive at all, never mind.

Seriously, do you like to submit?  Do you like to obey another person?  Does it excite you to be controlled?  All good indicators of submissiveness.




takemepleaseme -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 7:53:56 PM)

I guess what concerns me is the overall concept of submission. I think I can submit in the bedroom, but I don't think I could submit outside of it. So where would I fit?




Daddysredhead -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 8:08:40 PM)

Maybe you are more of a bedroom submissive or a bedroom bottom as I've heard it called.

I knew I was submissive when the Magic 8 Ball said I was.  But I asked it later, and it said, "no."  So, I decided I was a switch.  ~ tongue planted firmly in cheek ~   [;)]




RedMagic1 -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 8:11:23 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Madame4a
don't let anyone else tell you who you are... do some research

The best type of "research" being meeting/dating/relationshiping with people you like and trust, and finding out who you are by interaction with others.  Solitary navel-gazing can only go so far with this stuff.




laura2161 -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 8:11:40 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: takemepleaseme

I guess what concerns me is the overall concept of submission. I think I can submit in the bedroom, but I don't think I could submit outside of it. So where would I fit?


Some would describe that as simply a bedroom submissive or a bottom.

I'm wondering though, if you may be confusing being submissive to being kinky. If you enjoy the hair pulling, spanking what have you....but not really any form of submission or dominance, then there is nothing at all wrong with simply saying you are kinky or a bottom. :-)

Just a thought.




kittinSol -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 8:12:15 PM)

I realised something was up when I spontaneously orgasmed from nearly missing the deadline for turning in an essay in my final year at high school (I made it). I can still feel it pumping to this day [8D] : it wasn't 'normal' to be turned on by fear and anxiety so much. And indeed, I wasn't normal, not normal at all.





BRNaughtyAngel -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 8:13:20 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: takemepleaseme

I guess what concerns me is the overall concept of submission. I think I can submit in the bedroom, but I don't think I could submit outside of it. So where would I fit?


You may not be submissive at all.  Who knows!  To me, being submissive is an orientation and is totally seperate from BDSM play (kinky play and kinky sex).

You think can submit in the bedroom, and your OP said you sometimes feel mean and bossy in bed.  If you enjoy both topping and bottoming, then you'd be a switch.

Me..... I'm a kinky, service oriented, submissive woman.  All three of those things are seperate, but are all a part of me.




GreedyTop -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 8:13:46 PM)

but you're cute, KS... normal doesn't matter when you're as hot as you *grin*




MontrealPhoenix -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 8:14:32 PM)

Easy, my former Master told me i am...
 
phoenix aka imp




kittinSol -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 8:14:52 PM)

Toppy!




SleepyDom -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 8:20:53 PM)

kittinsol, that's actually quite normal, we all have spontaneous orgasms when we nearly miss the deadline for turning in an essay in our final year at high school.




Griswold -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 8:21:26 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: takemepleaseme

Clearly I am new to this, I have been told I am submissive, but I don't feel that way. I sometimes feel mean and bossy in bed, and I love dirty talk. Can some of you who are experienced in this area give me some insight into what makes a sub and what makes a dom? Can a woman who is independent still be a submissive?


It was when I errantly, in an eyeball to eyeball contest, took a parking space from a woman clad in leather. 

When she violently jumped out of her car with a baseball bat and mentioned that my dangly bits would make a splendid addition to her rear view mirror, I suddenly found myself eager to assist her in any way possible...

(I knew I was sub from that moment on).




kittinSol -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 8:22:18 PM)

You just ruined the past seventeen years of memories [:D] .




faerytattoodgirl -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 8:32:09 PM)

i knew i was submissive when i first tasted chocolate an diet pepsi... MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM




slavegirljoy -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 10:13:03 PM)


i was submissive long before i knew i was submissive because i had never heard of the word "submissive" when i first started submitting to men.
 
When i did learn the word, i realized that there was a name for the way i respond to a man i am intimately involved with.  i have always behaved the same way in every intimate relationship i have had, whether i was with a Dominant or not.  i always did whatever the man wanted me to do, i never tried to assert myself or take charge of the relationship, and i am always at his beck and call, ready, willing, and eager to serve him and pamper him.  It's simply how i have always treated the man i am involved with.
 
Being submissive doesn't mean you can't be independent.  For several years, i was a single, working mom, going to school full time, while holding a job, and living on my own, completely independent from anyone else.  But, i didn't stop being submissive.  i have never been submissive outside of my intimate relationship but, within it, i am submissive all the time, not just in the bedroom.  Any time i am involved with a man, i treat him with absolute deference to him, all the time.
 
joy
Owned servant of Master David




LuckyAlbatross -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/21/2008 10:20:59 PM)

Why do you need a name now?  Take time to name yourself.




Justme696 -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/22/2008 12:26:57 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: takemepleaseme

Clearly I am new to this, I have been told I am submissive, but I don't feel that way. I sometimes feel mean and bossy in bed, and I love dirty talk. Can some of you who are experienced in this area give me some insight into what makes a sub and what makes a dom? Can a woman who is independent still be a submissive?


if you don't feel that way, then you are not
no one decides who you are.




Owner4SexSlave -> RE: How do you know U R submissive? (5/22/2008 1:07:51 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: takemepleaseme

Clearly I am new to this, I have been told I am submissive, but I don't feel that way. I sometimes feel mean and bossy in bed, and I love dirty talk. Can some of you who are experienced in this area give me some insight into what makes a sub and what makes a dom? Can a woman who is independent still be a submissive?


Ummmmm... perhaps you are a "switch"?




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