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feeling neglected - 5/21/2008 11:38:23 PM

sexytia

Posts: 5
Joined: 5/21/2008
Status: offline

Greetings Everyone
Me and Master have been together over a year. Due to the distance between us, we only see each other every 4/5weeks, in between meetings we use email, phone etc. ...However the last few weeks it all changed, He is never on line, days go by and i don't get a text ( 6 days been the longest) . I have stared to feel neglected, frustrated and angry. I was angry at the point that i disobeyed just to provoke a
reaction. I have tried to talk To Master and explain how i feel but is answer is that i should wait patiently and enjoy the little moments we have together.

Post #: 1

RE: feeling neglected - 5/21/2008 11:51:37 PM

zhouwuatsien

Posts: 60
Joined: 8/28/2007
Status: offline

One of my slaves is in the same situation... I don't pick up her calls because I'm busy with work or school. I just don't have the time to call her back and she seems to have so much more time than I do... Although we don't see each other very often. I fly to Florida to be with her only once every three months... However even if she gets no answer she deligiently calls me. She never argues or provokes me... She just... Tells me how much she misses me. tells me how much she feel me and all. And honestly speaking. I wish she would argue because that would make me feel less like shit.

A slave is a Master's responsibility... At least, the way I do it. But to me, the Slave always has the option to leave the Master. But if you're going to serve him... Be obedient and Loving. -Shrugs- Just my take on it.

(in reply to sexytia)

Post #: 2

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 12:33:04 AM

Estring

Posts: 3314
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Obviously something has changed. If you have tried to talk with him and have not received an explanation, it doesn't look good for the relationship. He could just be busy, but if it were me, I would make sure my slave understood that that was all it was. Good luck.

_____________________________

Boycott Whales!

(in reply to sexytia)

Post #: 3

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 2:02:37 AM

eyesopened

Posts: 2798
Joined: 6/12/2006
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline

It is perfectly natural that if something feels good, we should want more of it and it's perfectly natural that if something feels good and we suddenly get less of it, well, to feel deprived.

Your Master wants you to be patient during the times apart and enjoy the times together. That doesn't seem like an unreasonable task, albeit not always an easy task but then tasks don't have to be easy to be obeyed.

Nature abhors a vacuum and it's human nature to fill a void of information with speculation. Sadly, speculation tends to be more negative in scope than the reality. That's why communication is often the answer to most situations on these boards.

my Master and i have not seen each other for 3 months! And we won't see each other for another two months! However, in our case there is a purpose for this and the purpose is to save every dime to use toward my relocation. See, the next time i see my Master, it will be forever.

People get busy, there may be simple issues of timing. One thing my Master and i do without fail is to say goodnight every single night. No matter how busy or how complicated our day-to-day lives might get, at some point in the day the day ends and its time to go to sleep. Was easy to form the habit of calling right before crawling into bed to say goodnight and i love You. Just a suggestion....

_____________________________

Proudly owned by InkedMaster. He is the one i obey, serve, honor and love.

No one is honored for what they've received. Honor is the reward for what has been given.

(in reply to sexytia)

Post #: 4

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 2:27:40 AM

incantatrice

Posts: 38
Joined: 1/23/2008
Status: offline

I am an old fashioned Master (Master to incantatrice) and I have done long distance relationships to the end. They arent easy on either side but time needs to be made by both.
Yes work loads seem to be increasing for all, but there is always time to send a text, pen a letter, type a quick email or pic up the phone.

Your between a rock and a hard place here. You need to bring the situation up and discuss it with your Master, but in the same time treat him with the respect he would have earnt, but that door goes both ways!
I have been taught that slaves have the easier part of the relationship, as they only have to put one person first where as a Master has to put his feelings first but also take into account the slave. To fully own and control someone a Master must understan this and juggle it well and that means allowing the slave to have a way to ask questions or voice its opinion, and this you need to do.

As for disobeying just to get a reaction, becareful as this can also be taken the wrong way and could backfire on you.

(in reply to eyesopened)

Post #: 5

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 3:36:21 AM

Dnomyar

Posts: 7933
Joined: 6/27/2005
Status: offline

Be glad he is not in the service. Then six days would seem a short time. If you need more attention then find someone closer to you.

(in reply to incantatrice)

Post #: 6

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 6:30:06 AM

antipode

Posts: 1787
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline

Maybe it is because you don't have a profile

(in reply to sexytia)

Post #: 7

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 6:49:25 AM

sabirah

Posts: 97
Status: offline

lack of profile ? I seriously doubt that. The ole mighty profile, easy cure to the fix it all problems.

quote:

ORIGINAL: antipode

Maybe it is because you don't have a profile

_____________________________

sincerely,
sabirah

The room is silent, absolutely silent, except for the decisive click of the collar lock.
It is a sound the girl will never forget.

(in reply to antipode)

Post #: 8

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 7:08:37 AM

CelticPrince

Posts: 3613
Joined: 4/15/2005
Status: offline

quote:

People get busy, there may be simple issues of timing. One thing my Master and i do without fail is to say goodnight every single night. No matter how busy or how complicated our day-to-day lives might get, at some point in the day the day ends and its time to go to sleep. Was easy to form the habit of calling right before crawling into bed to say goodnight and i love You. Just a suggestion....

eyes,

A great solution to the old distance problem; good to see it in a post.

CP

(in reply to eyesopened)

Post #: 9

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 9:23:53 AM

BRNaughtyAngel

Posts: 1821
Status: offline

Every LDR is different, and you've gotten some good replies so far. I'll give you my experience too. My former owner did neglect me terribly. We were only two hours apart and both had plenty of free time to get together, but he'd always make excuses and ignore my expressions of loneliness, etc....

Long story made short....... he is no longer my owner.

My Master refers to my former owner as the biggest idiot on the planet, but is thankful he was the biggest idiot on the planet because that's what brought us together.

(in reply to sexytia)

Post #: 10

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 10:40:10 AM

xxblushesxx

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

Long distance relationships work for many, but, I like mine up close and personal. Makes it lots harder to be neglected.

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to BRNaughtyAngel)

Post #: 11

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 10:41:37 AM

camille65

Posts: 5746
Joined: 7/11/2007
From: Austin Texas
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: xxblushesxx

Long distance relationships work for many, but, I like mine up close and personal. Makes it lots harder to be neglected.

The loneliest and most neglected I've ever been was when I was married and sleeping in the same bed as my husband.

_____________________________

~Love your life! (It is the only one you'll get).

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

Post #: 12

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 10:51:50 AM

xxblushesxx

Posts: 9318
Joined: 11/3/2005
From: Kentucky
Status: offline

I understand. Long distance relationships do work for many. But not me.

_____________________________

~Christina

A nice girl with a disturbing hobby

My femdom findom blog: http://www.MistressAvarice.com

(in reply to camille65)

Post #: 13

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 6:38:19 PM

Quivver

Posts: 1953
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline

Neglected is a needy word. As yourself if your needy or if something is breaking down. If it's the later, it's a lack of Maintenance. Sometimes it's all in the wording.

_____________________________

The problem with communication ... is the illusion that it has been accomplished. ~George Bernard Shaw

(in reply to xxblushesxx)

Post #: 14

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 7:17:05 PM

Roselaure

Posts: 672
Joined: 4/12/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: camille65

The loneliest and most neglected I've ever been was when I was married and sleeping in the same bed as my husband.

Amen sister.

_____________________________

Once conform, once do what other people do because they do it, and lethargy steals over all the finer nerves and faculties of the soul.
-Virginia Woolf

(in reply to camille65)

Post #: 15

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 7:57:24 PM

katie978

Posts: 352
Joined: 7/21/2007
Status: offline

   It's difficult to say whether your master is trying to teach you to be patient or just ignoring you because he's been messing around. You likely know better than any of us as to whether your man is just being all domly, or has been unusually busy, or something fishy is up.

   Personally, I think that communication in a long-distance relationship is pretty much the essense of that relationship. I live about 3 hours from my master, and, although we see each other every weekend, if we went so much as 3 days without talking to each other, I would be driving down there to see what was wrong.

   Again, I can't speak for your relationship, but if you've been with your master for a year, you ought to know what he's generally up to, and you know or can guess the reasons he'd be ignoring you. If you think it's something benign, like he's switched to a different shift at work or is caring for a sick family member, and you're just having trouble dealing with it, I suggest you try and find a hobby or something you can do just for you, so you don't miss him so much. If you think something shady is going on-you're probably right. Maintaining a long-distance relationship is hard, and some people aren't cut out for it.

Good luck.

_____________________________

"That's the plan. Rule the world. You and me. Anyday ::wink::"

(in reply to sexytia)

Post #: 16

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 9:02:40 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

If that is his answer, you then decide whether that situation is fulfilling for you or not. You can ask if there's a reason for the change in communication, often knowing the reasoning can help a slave process things much better, but there's no saying he'll respond or give you the answer you find good.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to katie978)

Post #: 17

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 9:22:51 PM

ResidentSadist

Posts: 12580
Joined: 2/11/2007
From: a mean old Daddy, but I like you - Joni Mitchell
Status: offline

FYI - sexytia has no profile,,, as in no account.

Profile Not Found

_____________________________

-=BDSM Book List=- Reading is Fundamental !!!
I give good thread.

(in reply to sexytia)

Post #: 18

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 9:24:29 PM

TemptingNviceSub

Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sexytia

Greetings Everyone
Me and Master have been together over a year. Due to the distance between us, we only see each other every 4/5weeks, in between meetings we use email, phone etc. ...However the last few weeks it all changed, He is never on line, days go by and i don't get a text ( 6 days been the longest) . I have stared to feel neglected, frustrated and angry. I was angry at the point that i disobeyed just to provoke a
reaction. I have tried to talk To Master and explain how i feel but is answer is that i should wait patiently and enjoy the little moments we have together.

Before assuming anything..maybe you should simply wait until you are once again face to face..and then sit down and have a heart to heart discussion. Seems from your usual habits one will be coming up soon...Tempting

_____________________________

I have greatly enjoyed the second blooming...suddenly you find at the age of 50, that a whole new life has opened before you.........Agatha Christie.

You must make tracks into the unknown~~Thoreau

(in reply to sexytia)

Post #: 19

RE: feeling neglected - 5/22/2008 10:55:00 PM

sexytia

Posts: 5
Joined: 5/21/2008
Status: offline

Thank You All for your for your input, I know that it's hard to give advice on a relationship from just a few lines.
My appologies for not having a profile, i only joined yesterday and i was in a bit of a rush. My profile has been updated

(in reply to TemptingNviceSub)

Post #: 20

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